我为喜剧狂（2006）
30 Rock S05E13
Part 2
June 7, 2022, 4:04 p.m.
算了 那我就一个人去那家爆米花店
Fine. I'll just go to the popcorn place alone,
尽管他们广♥告♥是写着
even though all their advertising suggests
那是一个呼朋唤友一起度过美好时光的地方
it is a place for groups of friends to have a good time.
你好
Hello.
祝你外套好
Good sweatshirt to you.
这外套让你感觉外套吗?
How are you sweatshirting this sweatshirt?
你没事吧 Tracy? - 我想要这件外套!
Is everything all right, Tracy?- I want that sweatshirt!
不行
No.
你不能再把这个夺走了 就像你当初夺走我的节目一样
You can't take this away from me, like you took away my show.
还有我外婆的珠宝盒
And my grandmother's jewelry chest.
难道你想我当时吐在我自己东西上吗?
Was I supposed to throw up in something of mine?
这是你给我的
You gave this to me.
那我就能把它要回来啊 我才是这里的大牌
And I can take it back. I'm the star here.
要是这里只有一件外套 那就应该是给大牌的
And if there's only one sweatshirt, the star should have it.
看它多灰啊
Look how Gray it is.
就给我一下下嘛
Let me just hold it for one second.
让我想想...
Well...
好吧
okay.B
但就一下
ut just one second.
你才不会得到她呢!
You'll never get her!
停下! 外套的属性是个男的!
Stop! Sweatshirty is a boy!
Lemon小姐
Miss Lemon.
Carmen Chao刚刚说想跟你做个访问
Carmen Chao called about an interview.
她是不是在做某个关于受教育女性由于 女权主义导致出现幸福危机的专题啊?
Is she doing an expose on how feminism has led to a happiness crisis among educated women?
不 Kenneth 没什么
No, Kenneth, it's nothing.
我会给Jack打电♥话♥ 然后就没这回事了
I'm gonna call Jack and make it go away.
看这个
Check this out.
我刚在大家乐食堂里 跟这位仁兄在一起
I was up in the everybody dining room, sharing a table with b. Dubs here,
猜他刚跟我说什么
and guess what he told me.
好吧 特大八卦
Okay, gossip alert.
根据我同事Carmen的消息 Liz Lemon怀孕了
According to my colleague Carmen Chao, our friend Liz Lemon is pregnant.
是真的吗?
Dude, is that true?
你怀孕了吗? - 那岂不是天大的好消息啊?
Are you pregnant? - Isn't that wonderful news?
Lemon今天早上告诉我 她被人给搞爽大发了
Lemon told me this morning she got jacked big time.
Lemon 来一下
Uh, Lemon, a word?
这是怎么回事?
What the hell is gong on?
谢谢你那天帮Avery圆场
Thank you for covering for Avery last night.
但现在你又卷进来了 而且Carmen Chao可不是好对付的!
But now you're a part of this, and Carmen Chao is relentless!
就跟只猎犬似的 真的
Like a bloodhound. Perhaps literally.
我们现在还是不清楚她的祖籍
We still don't know her genetic background.
人人都觉得我怀孕了 现在怎么样?
So what, now people think I'm pregnant?
我一定要做这个妈妈专题吗?
Do I have to do this mom news story?
没人在乎什么专题
There is no news story.
Carmen拿Avery没办法 所以她现在对你在虚张声势
Carmen isn't getting anywhere with Avery, so she's trying to call your bluff.
这可是有作用的
Well, it is called.
我这就去跟在场的每个人说我不可能怀孕
I am telling everyone here that there's no way I could be pregnant
因为我大姨妈来了有61天了
because I have had my period for the last 61 days.
Lemon 求求你
Lemon, please.
这可是Avery事业的转折点
Avery's career has never been more important
因为我不知道现在我的事业是怎么了!
because I just don't know what's happening with mine!
什么? 为什么?
What? Why?
大家乐食堂 公开办公时间 有表情的备忘录!
The everyone dining room, open office hours, memos with emoticons in them!
如果这是Kabletown的做法 我不知道 我在这里还有没有前途了
If this is how Kabletown does business, I don't know if I have a future here.
我可是Jack Donaghy!
I'm Jack Donaghy!
Don Geiss可是因为我在他死前 开了一个人所以才把这表给了我!
Don Geiss gave me this watch for firing a man on his deathbed!
等一下 所以你要走吗?
So wait, you might leave?
我不知道我还能不能在这里生存下去了
I don't know if I can survive here.
所以我需要你假装怀孕来帮助我的家庭
So I need you to fake being pregnant to help my family.
我现在在以一个朋友的身份来求你
I'm asking you as a friend.
为什么每次我要你跟我去谋杀谜团♥派♥对时
How come when I try to get you to go to a murder-mystery party with me,
你就总是说 "我们只是工作上的关系 Lemon"?
it's all, "we're business colleagues, Lemon"?
我都不知道我怎么会把你当朋友的
Ugh, I don't know why I ever chose you as a friend.
我们先来搞清楚 是我选了你
Let's just be clear about this... I chose you.
我听说了 你的好消息 Liz
I heard the blessed news, Liz.
我能亲亲你的肚皮吗?
May I kiss your stomach?
绝对不可以 - 你好啊 小美人
Absolutely not. - Hello, beautiful.
这是Wutzy叔叔
It's uncle Wutzy.
Jack 我们俩一会还有个研讨会呢
Oh, hey, Jack, you and I have a pitch meeting later.
你就是个宝贝 没错
You're a baby.Yes, you are.
你是个小宝贝
Yes, you're a baby...
这节目基本上就是这样
So that's basically the show.
我的助手是个超辣的黑妞 她还能读懂人心思
And my sidekick is a hot black chick who can read minds.
我们还需要一个可以从黄♥片♥迅速 转换到篮球节目的按钮
We need a button that switches from pornography to basketball immediately.
现在的还不够快
What you have isn't fast enough.
我孩子现在问我的问题 都让我无言以对了
My kids are starting to ask questions that I can't answer.
再等一下
This'll just be a minute.
你检查过那灯泡了吗?
Did you check the lightbulb?
别用那语气跟我说话
Please do not use that tone.
现在很多的电视节目 都不适合孩子 基♥督♥徒和老人
So much of television is really not fit for children or christians or the elderly.
要是我们能有个黑条来挡住屏幕的下半截
So what if there was a black bar on the lower half of your TV screen
这样我们不就看不到不良内容了吗?
that kept you from seeing bad things?
就像露点 足球
Like nudity, or soccer.
恭喜你
Congratulations.
到现在为止最烂的主意!
Worst so far!
Liz 我从来都得不到任何东西
Liz, I never get anything.
我只是想要件外套
All I want is one sweatshirt.
别听她的 她不是我
Don't listen to her. She's not me.
怎么回事?
What is going on?
这是我的 - 故事是这样开始的 当海豚主宰地球的时候
This is mine. - The story begins when dolphins ruled the earth.
各位 放过Liz吧 好吧?
Hey, guys, lay off Liz, okay?
你们知道她怀孕了
You know she's pregnant.
真的吗? - 当然 怀了好多呢
Really?- Yeah. Super-pregnant.
恭喜你
Congratulations.
我对当教父一点兴趣没有
I am not interested in godfather duties.
现在说有点早了 但你的脐带我要吃哈
Now's not the time to discuss this, but I will need to eat your umbilical cord.
抱歉我们给你这么大压力
I'm sorry we were stressing you out.
我们不该这么做的
We shouldn't do that.
这样下去孩子会成吸血鬼的
It'll turn the child into a Dracula.
对不起
I'm sorry.
行了 把外套给我
You know what, give me the sweatshirt.
问题解决了
Problem solved.
现在谁也得不到了
Now no one gets it.
姐可是孕妇 你们现在快滚!
Pregnant.Now get out of here!
而且得像好朋友一样手拉手出去
And hold hands like best friends on the way out.
这太神奇了
Oh, that is like magic.
人们对孕妇都很友善
People are nice to pregnant ladies.
我要下楼一趟
I'm gonna run downstairs.
用不用给你带点啥东西啊?
Do you want anything?
记着 你现在是两个人的胃口咯 - 那就两个鸡蛋三明治…
Remember, you're eating for two.- Well, I guess two egg sandwiches...
乘以二 等于四个
Times two is four.
早上好!
Good morning!
员工开放日进行得怎么样啊 Jack?
So how did co-worker pitch day go, Jack?
当然 下属开放日对我来说是个新体验
Well, employee pitch day was,of course, a new experience for me.
说到新体验 我昨晚去了家印度餐厅
Oh, speaking of new experiences, I ate at an Indian restaurant last night.
吃了印度烤饼
I had naan.
先生 我是说 Hank 我很尊重你的工作方式 但我也有我的
Sir... I mean, Hank, I appreciate that you have your way of doing things,but so do I.
我可是"六西格玛"管理理论黑带级别的信徒 腹股沟上烙有证明的
I am a Six Sigma black belt ultra, with the groin branding to prove it.
"六西格玛"是个啥? 摇滚乐队?
What's Six Sigma? Rock band?
我想首先分享一个我的点子
I'd like to start this meeting by sharing one of my own ideas.
听了之后 你会觉得 员工开放日的时间
And after you hear it, maybe we can agree that employee pitch day is time
倒不如用来喝着小酒 欣赏窗外风景
that could be better spent drinking and looking out the window.
好吧 Jack!
Okay, Jack!
看来你对这想法很有自信啊
You're putting it on the line.
说吧
What have you got?
Hank 我们的收视体验中 最值得改进的点是什么?
Hank, what's the one part of the television experience that's not perfect?
我觉得是遥控器
To me, it's the remote control.
太容易弄丢了 是吧?
Too easy to lose, right?
就是! 我经常弄丢
Yes! I lose my remote all the time.
都怪沙发垫!
Grr, couch cushions!
要是你根本就不用遥控器了勒 因为你的声音就是遥控器 想过没?
What if you didn't need a remote control because your remote control was your own voice?
我为喜剧狂（2006）
30 Rock
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