我为养生狂（2023）

Something, um, bold, then?
不要太甜
Not too sweet.
好,不能太单调,对吧?
Yeah. Definitely complex, right?
顺滑,如天鹅绒一般
Smooth, like velvet.
我想我有正合妳意的
I think I've got the perfect thing.
谢了
Thanks.
也太辣了吧
That was hot.
是我九天来最火♥辣♥的一次
And, like, the most action I've had in about nine days.
我和道格上个月好像忘了例行开机
I think Doug and I missed last month's maintenance root.
你们真的这麽机械式吗?
Is that as mechanical as it sounds? - Meh, gotta keep the wheels greased.
总得随时保持运转才行
好喔,所以婚姻就是减少性♥爱♥ 但浴室多了男性阴毛
Right, so marriage is just less sex and more male pubes in the shower.
-再提醒我一次结婚的好处 -串流服务可以省钱?
Why did you do it, again? - Save on streaming services?
难怪妳这麽紧绷拜託,妳不能老是独守空闺
No wonder you're so tightly wound. Come on, you've gotta get the D in the V.
我的闺房♥生活很满足亲密关係不只有性
I'm getting what I need. Intimacy is more than sex.
道格和我没事
Doug and I are fine.
我爱妳,但我坚持妳要重拾高♥潮♥
I love you, but I insist you revisit coming.
真的很美好
It is so good.
-我有跟妳提过那个健身房♥勐男? -有
Did I tell you about the guy at the gym? - Yeah.
他的股沟受伤了
He's got a groin injury.
但妳还是会跟他上♥床♥?
But you're gonna have sex with him anyway?
阿嘉的确说过我需要多多提高心率
Well, Gaz did say I need to get my heart rate up more regularly.
拜託,别把妳的性♥爱♥马拉松记录到妳弟的健身手錶裡
Ew, please do not log your sex marathons in your brother's Fitbit. Ew.
谁要试酒?
Uh, who'd like to taste?
对,你可以直接倒在这杯子裡
Yeah, you can just pour a glass right here. Thank you.
接着倒,没关係 这是我第四杯也是最后一杯,好吗?
You can just keep going, that's fine. It's my fourth and final drink, okay?
很好,谢谢
Yeah. Sure. Thanks.
谢谢
Thank you.
不客气
No worries.
谢了
Thanks.
亲爱的,我全身上下只穿了你最喜欢的T恤
Honey, I'm wearing your favorite T-shirt and nothing else.
宝贝,醒醒
Babe. Babe, wake up.
宝贝?
Hmm? - Babe?
转过去
Turn over.
好喔
Oh, okay.
晚安
Night night.
(滑翔健身房♥)
妈,什麽事?
Hey, Mum, what's up?
妳把我的杏仁奶都喝光了
You drank all my almond milk.
对不起
Oh, sorry.
-顺便买♥♥酒回家,好吗? -没问题
Can you bring home some wine as well? - Sure.
-还有卫生纸 -还要什麽?
And toilet paper. - Uh, anything else?
没有了,就是杏仁奶 葡萄酒和卫生纸
No, just the almond milk, wine, and toilet paper.
好诡异
Oh, that's grim.
(艾美:我严重宿醉)
(莉维:我也是!)
-嘿 -嘿
[Isaac] Hey. - Hey.
(莉维:我去三温暖逼汗 没去什麽魔鬼训练)
(莉维:阿嘉气死了!)
[Isaac sighs]
所以妳又回健身房♥了?
[Isaac] So you back in the gym?
-阿嘉一定被妳累坏了 -我就是会把人操爆
You must've worn Gaz out. - Yeah, I have that effect on people.
妳很幸运,他是很棒的教练
You're lucky. He's a great trainer.
-这裡每个人都喜欢他 -他到九岁还会尿床
Everyone around here loves him. - He wet the bed till he was nine.
所以你是什麽来历,艾萨克? 结婚了没?
So, what's your story, Isaac, huh? You married?
我结过婚
Uh, I was.
-有对象? -曾经有
Dating? - I was, yeah.
现在呢?
And now?
乏善可陈
Not so much.
-听来好神秘,那就回头见了? -对了...
On that mysterious note, see you around?
我股沟的伤还没好
Yeah. Uh, I'm still trying to iron out this groin injury,
我们明天上课见
so I'll probably, uh, catch you in the class tomorrow.
对了,你的大股沟伤
Ah, yeah, the big groin injury.
其实是...
Oh, like-- The--
伤得很大
The injury is big.
我不是说你的...可能是...
I'm-- I'm not saying that your-- Prob-- You probably--
-我要走了 -好
I'm gonna go. - Okay.
好,我想我喜欢天然棉但达伯特提过皮革,所以...
Okay, I think I like natural cotton, but Dalbert mentioned leather,
现在我拿不定主意
so now I'm not sure.
-妳说呢? -当然好
What do you think? - Totally.
-妳根本没在听 -当然好
You're not even listening. - Totally.
还给我,猪头,我在写一篇重要报导
Give it back, dickhead. I'm working on an important story.
跟我有关吗?
Oh, is it about me?
对,没错
Yep. Yeah.
标题是《妇女在採买♥♥无聊东西时
It's titled "Woman Strangles Little Brother to Death
勒死胞弟》
while Shopping for Boring Shit."
是妳说要帮忙婚礼的
You said you'd help with wedding stuff.
你挑哪一种有差别吗?
Does it really matter which one you pick?
达伯特觉得有
It matters to Dalbert.
他希望我们的大喜之日很完美
He wants our big day to be perfect.
好吧
Okay.
这个
This one.
当然要选这个 如果阿达不喜欢,叫他去死
Obvious choice. If Dally doesn't like it, he can suck it.
妳觉得他会不喜欢?
Do you think he won't like it?
天啊,你要把我逼疯了
Oh, my God, you are killing me.
怎麽了?
What?
妳的步数已经连续两天落后了
Well, your steps are lagging for the second day in a row.
好
Fine.
我们再走一圈
Let's do another lap while
投入令人目眩神迷的座位牌世界
we dive into the riveting world of place cards.
好吗?你最爱座位牌了
Yeah? You love a place card.
-妳真是大猪头 -再买♥♥几支书法笔
You're a dickhead. - Get some calligraphy pens.
-你好 -妳好
Hi. - Hi.
我在找酒,我很喜欢你那天的推荐
Uh, I'm after some wine, and I really enjoyed your recommendations.
没问题
Sure.
是艾美,对吧?
It's, um, Amy, right?
对
Yeah.
妳想找怎样的?
Uh, what are you looking for?
有点冒险的?
Something a little adventurous?
好
Okay.
这是很棒的西班牙红酒
This is an excellent Spanish red.
有劲、充满表现力
It's powerful, expressive,
还有点辣
and a little bit spicy.
对,这就是我要的感觉想来一杯吗?
Ooh. Yeah, I'm definitely feeling that. - Would you like a glass?
有人在吗?妈
Hello, Mum? Mum?
老妈?
Mother?
妳在哪裡?
Where are you?
怎麽回事?
What's going on?
大家熟知且喜爱的洛琳到哪儿去了?
What happened to the Lorraine we all know and love?
她死了,跟着她的事业没了
She died, along with her career.
妳把旅程最精彩的一段打断了
Oh, you stopped it at the best part of the journey!
妈,我知道妳被开除很伤心
Mum, I know it sucks that you lost your job,
可是妳不能这样整天坐着
but you cannot sit here forever.
奥莉薇,妳建议我做什麽好呢?
What do you suggest I do, Olivia?
主厨的招牌菜
[waiter] The chef's masterpiece.
-请享用 -抱歉,不好意思
Enjoy. - Sorry, excuse me.
请问这是蔬食吗?
Do you know if this is vegan by any chance?
这是解构的橙汁鸭
Uh, no, this is a deconstructed duck à l'orange.
鸭胸慕斯上面有一层脆皮
It's a breast mousse with a suspended crispy skin.
还有粉状白酒、芫荽鱼子酱
There's powdered white wine, coriander caviar,
以胡萝卜泡沫为基底
the essence of carrot foam base,
所以...不是蔬食
so... not vegan.
谢谢。
Thanks.
-天啊 -看起来好可怕
Oh, man. - It looks scary.
竟然从妳这位 在休旅车后面生老二的女人口中说出
Said the woman who gave birth to her second child in the back of a Tarago.
这让我想起黏液栓塞
That's what it reminds me of, a mucus plug.
妳知道我喜欢什麽吗?
Oh, do you know what I love?
鸭肉搭配黏液栓塞
A duck with a side of mucus plug.
妳现在给我吃,然后告诉我感想 好让我写评论
Now, you need to eat it and tell me what it's like for my review.
-这是作弊 -少来了,妈
That's not ethical. - Oh, come on, Mum.
阿嘉一直盯着我不能乱吃
Gaz is on my case about eating clean,
可能还要八间餐厅才能找到加布列
and it might be another eight restaurants until I find Gabriel.
薇乐莉对我寄予厚望
Valerie's counting on me.
-拜託妳吃一口 -不要,我已经知道我不喜欢了
Please just put it in your mouth. - No. I know I'll hate it already.