出柜家庭（2016）

The Real O'Neals S01E02

Part 4 Aug. 27, 2020, 11:24 a.m.

正常
Normal.
所以只要我是正常的你就不在乎我开不开心!
So, you don't care if I'm happy as long as I'm normal!
是的!
Yes!
你为什么不能跟一个我无法忍♥受的荡♥妇♥
Why can't you just spend the rest of your life
共度余生?!
with a trampy girl I can't stand?!
你知道么今天真是难以忍♥受的一天
You know what? This has been a tough day.
我要走了
I'm gonna go.
她在浴室里很安静至少这点还挺好的
She's quiet in the bathroom. I'll give her that.
妈妈我可不可以进去准备我的项目?
Mom, can I go in and set up my project?
不行
No.
我们要等你♥爸♥爸来然后我们就可以一家一起进去了
We're waiting for your father so we can go in as a family.
是啊我们要做正常人莎伦记得么?
Yeah, we've got to be normal, Shannon, remember?
尤其是我所以小姐们看好你们的胸部
Especially me. So, ladies, guard your fun bags.
因为这里有个直男在狩猎
cause this heterosexual is on the prowl.
这都什么跟什么?
What in the world?
抱歉我们来晚了
Sorry we're late.
你应该把这个东西卖♥♥掉的
You were supposed to sell that thing.
我知道
I know.
你为什么闻起来像恶魔之汤?
Why do you smell like the devil's chowder?
你为什么爱莫斯科?
Why do you love Moscow?
我不想说
I don't want to talk about it.
无论如何
Anyway, whatever.
我们要一起走进去一家人
Let's just walk in together, as a family.
我们要把莎伦的冠军和我们的尊严拿回来
We'll get Shannon's blue ribbon and our dignity back.
让我们告诉他们我们不需要他们的火腿
Let's show them we don't need their ham.
好吧重启主计划
Okay. Initiate Master Plan.
吸引全校的目光... 完成
Gather entire school... check.
有最聪明的孩子完成了头等荣誉的项目... 完成
Have smartest child finish blue-ribbon project... check.
让所有人看到你们
And make sure everyone sees you
如同完美的一家走进去... 完成
walk in as the perfect family... check.
看看我妈妈多高兴
Look how happy my mom is.
这是她的闪亮时刻
This is her shining moment.
艾琳!
Eileen!
我真高兴能在这里看到你
I'm so happy to see you here.
好了让我给你展示一下天主教的妈妈的言谈
Okay, let me show you some catholic mom-speak.
你们家最近真不容易啊
Your family's just been through so much.
你收到我的火腿了么?
Did you get my ham?
我收到了火腿很好吃
Yes, I did, and it was delicious.
谢谢你这么好心
Thank you for your kindness.
表演结束
And scene.
电脑越来越智能化了对吧?
Computers are getting smarter and smarter, am I right?
根据摩尔定律
Well, according to Moore's law,
电脑很快就会有
computers will soon have the capacity
虚拟另外一个
to run simulations of multiple universes
人们信仰自己的意识的宇宙的能力
where the people in them believe in their own consciousness.
所以我们现在所生活的现实
So, there's a very good chance that the reality
很有可能是一个电脑的虚拟场景
we're experiencing now is a computer simulation.
因此我的假设是
Therefore, my hypothesis is...
世界上没有上帝
there is no god.
我们为什么不能做一个
Why can't we just be a normal family
选择做蠢火山的正常家庭?
who does stupid volcanos?
可能因为我们就是座火山
Well, maybe because we are the volcano.
莎伦...
Shannon...
我很遗憾地通知你
I'm sad to say
你的 "无神论" 项目没有达到
Your project disproving god doesn't fit the parameters
圣巴克利科学展的标准
We've set for our science fair here at St. Barklay's.
我们爱科学但是这太过了
We love science, but this is pushing it.
你被取消资格了
I'm afraid you've been disqualified.
莎伦
Shannon.
妈妈是对的
Mom was right.
我就该做一些她想要的正常的项目
I should have just done a normal project like she wanted.
起码你还能做正常的项目
Well, at least you can do a normal project one day.
我永远都是令人失望的孩子
I'm gonna be a disappointment forever.
是吧?
You know?
好好想想
I mean, think about it.
等等
Hang on a second.
克莱门斯小姐...
Miss Clemens...
你可能不认可这个项目
You may not agree with this project.
其实我也不认可这个项目
In fact, I don't agree with it.
我也不太明白里面的远离
I don't actually understand it.
我也不能容忍♥它的结论
And I certainly don't condone what it says.
但我爱这个项目
BUT I LOVE THIS PROJECT.
我从它是个小... 就爱上它了
I've loved it since it was a little...
小项目
Project.
可能它并不正常
Maybe it's not normal.
但是正常并不是最重要的东西
But maybe being normal isn't the most important thing.
对于一个项目来说
For a project.
哈! 太好了! 我们赢了! 第一名!
BLAM! YES! WE WON! FIRST PLACE!
这只是参与绶带
That's just the participation ribbon
每个孩子都有
That all the children get.
妈妈谢谢你的支持
I appreciate your support, mom.
对我意义很大
It really means a lot.
你直到相信上帝之前不准出门
You're grounded until you believe in god.
谢谢你之前说的那些
Thank you for what you said back there.
我不懂你为啥谢我
I don't know why you're thanking me.
我是为了莎伦说的
I was talking about Shannon.
那谢谢你为莎伦说了那些话
Well, thank you for what you said about Shannon.
不客气
You're welcome.
我知道你很难过我没赢得比赛
I know you're upset that I didn't win,
但那真的不是什么大事
But it's really no big deal
因为我证明了这一切都是假的
Since I proved none of this is real.
你零花钱没了
And now you've lost your allowance.
随你吧
Whatever.
金钱只是政♥府♥用来
Money is just a ponzi scheme
控制民众的庞氏骗局
That the government created to control the masses.
你先走
You go.
不不亲爱的你先走
No, no, no, honey, you go.
不你先
No, you go.
不用你先
No, no, go on.
你先走
You can go.
我了个去...
Oh, for the love of...
你先吧甜心
Go ahead, sweetheart.
你先
You go.
我想到一个
I think I figured out a way
可以让你吃到你妈做的五色饭的办法了
for you to have your mom's five-layer dip
而且你周日还可以跟我一起看球
And still watch football with me on Sundays.
我搬到地下室去
I'm gonna move into the basement.
太棒了!
Awesome!
爸你的决定太英明了!
You are making some good choices, dad!
谢谢儿子听着
Ah, thanks, buddy. And listen.
如果你有任何不顺心的事
If there's anything you're ever worried about
或者只是想找我聊聊随便什么...
or you just want to come and talk to me... anything...
你和妈妈还会是朋友吗?
Are you and mom still gonna be friends?
希望是吧
I hope so.
可能会成为更好的朋友
Maybe we'll be better friends.
不讲真你先走
No, no, really, you go.
真的?
Really?
是的
Yes.
好吧
Okay.
你让我走的!
You told me to go!
你们这些人怎么回事?
What is wrong with you people?!
蜜蜜我们这些人问题真的很多
There's a lot wrong with us, Mimi.
让你一天内多次受伤
Causing bodily harm to you multiple times
只是刚刚开始
in a single day is only the beginning.
伙伴们我不会难过
You guys, I'm not gonna be offended.
和我说实话
Just tell me the truth.
女式衬衫
Blouse.
讲真?
Really?
那这件呢?
This one.
划分十个等级的话
On a scale of 1 to 10...