出柜家庭（2016）

The Real O'Neals S01E06

Part 1 Aug. 27, 2020, 11:25 a.m.

我真挺爱我爸和我哥的
I really love my dad and brother,
只是有时候我看不太懂
But sometimes I don't fully understand
他们交流感情的方式尤其是这个
Their male-bonding rituals, especially this one.
- 约架吗! - 约!
- boy battle! - boy battle!
来吧开始
Let's go. Come on!
你这样怎么赢下周的区域赛
How are you gonna win regionals next week
连基础法则都搞不清楚?
If you don't know the fundamentals?
即使在我看来有些方式也是太基了
Some of the rituals are just too gay, even for me.
好吧如果掐咪♥咪♥不犯规的话
Okay, if purple nurples are legal...
啊! 天呐! 啊!
Aah! Oh, god! Ah!
听着吉米够了!
Jimmy, listen, that's enough!
嘿嘿嘿!
Hey, hey, hey!
要打去你的单身公♥寓♥里打
Take your fight club down to your divorce apartment.
抱歉我要纠正一下你这么说真奇怪
I'm sorry I fought for that, 'cause it really sounds weird.
能好好说地下室吗
Let's just call it a basement.
还有我刚在清理车♥库♥
Also, I was cleaning out the garage.
这帐篷你准备咋办?
What would you like me to do with this tent?
看
Look at that.
这是你出生时我买♥♥的
This is the tent I bought when you were born
这样我就能带你露营了
So I could take you camping.
我可不记得
I don't remember that.
再说一次你刚出生
Well, again, you were just born.
吉米你看
Well, what do you say, Jimmy?
这周末带她出去物尽其用如何?
You want to take her out this weekend, break it in?
我们能用树叶当草纸嘛?
Can we use leaves as toilet paper?
我早就想试试
I've always wanted to try that.
当然可以不是所有树叶都可以哦
Oh, of course we can, but not all of them.
记住 "三片叶别碰它"
Remember, "Leaves of three, let them be,"
你的屁♥股♥事关重大
especially when it comes to your butt.
真是一个好主意帕特
That's very good advice, Pat.
还有如果有灰熊攻击的话憋跑
Also, if a grizzly bear attacks, don't run.
秀出肌肉让你看起来比较勇猛
Just puff yourself up to make yourself look bigger.
玩的愉快
Have fun.
这会很棒对吧?
Well, this is gonna be great, huh?
奥尼尔家的男人们开启一项新传统
Start a new tradition with the O'neal men.
你们有没有忘了什么?
Aren't you forgetting something?
提醒到位肯尼
Oh, good call, Kenny.
艾琳你能帮我们做几个三明治嘛?
Eileen, could you make us some sandwiches?
真男人自己做三明治!
Uh, real men make their own sandwiches!
这不是我要提醒你们的
That's not why I went "Ahem."
我要提醒的是
I went "Ahem"
如果你们要搞父子野营的话
Because if you're going on a father/son camping trip,
不应该带上你所有的儿子吗?
Shouldn't you take all of your sons?
有啥好笑的?
What's so funny?
肯尼得了吧你讨厌大自然
Kenny, come on. You hate nature.
我才不
I do not.
你真不记得你去蝴蝶保护区
Don't you remember what happened
那天发生的事情吗?
When you went to the butterfly sanctuary?
在那个骚年的肩上的
There, on that young man's shoulder,
是非常罕见的白炽月娥
Is the very rare incandescent luna moth.
美国现仅存30只
Only 30 of them exist in the united states.
我的意思是就仅仅因为我是基佬
My point is, just because I'm gay
并不意味着我不能做男人的事情懂?
Doesn't mean I can't do man things, you know?
就像跟我哥和我爸一起去野营联络感情
Like bonding with my brother and my dad on a camping trip.
《魔法黑森林》可是我最喜欢的音乐剧之一
I mean, "Into the woods" Is one of my favorite musicals.
如果你很想来
Listen, if this is something you really want to do,
当然可以
Of course you can come.
来吧
Come on.
首先把帐篷拿出去
First job take that tent outside,
- 检查防雨涂层 - 雨?!
- Make sure it's got a rain fly. - Rain?!
你觉得会下雨?
You think it might rain?
好的噻我要去坚信礼课了
Okay, I'm off to confirmation class.
最后一课哦
Your last one.
这真不是什么大事妈
It's really not that big of a deal, mom.
是最大的事
It's the biggest deal.
一个星期内大主教就会认可你
In just a week, the archbishop will confirm you
成为教会的成人成员
As an adult member of the church.
我小小的天主教女儿
My little catholic girl
就要成为小小的天主教女人啦
Is becoming a little catholic woman.
我准备顺走一个小小的天主教苹果
Well, I'm gonna grab a little catholic apple.
这个你也要直播吗?
You want to get some coverage of that, too?
憋搞笑了我当然要拿好苹果
Don't be ridiculous. of course I do. Hold it up.
肯尼人呢?
Where's Kenny?
你觉得他改主意了吗?
Do you think he changed his mind?
肯定没有啊!
He most certainly did not!
汉子们准备好了吗?
What’s up, muchachos?
肯尼就一晚上不是一辈子
Kenny, we're going for one night, not one lifetime.
我造啊我造这可能看上去有点多
I know. I know this seems like a lot,
但昨晚我看了一个荒野专家
But last night, I watched a wilderness expert
展示荒野求生的技巧
demonstrate the ins and outs of outdoor survival.
- 贝尔·格里尔斯?[美国探险家主持人] - 瑞茜·威瑟斯彭[美国女演员]
- Bear Grylls? - Reese Witherspoon.
我可是看了两遍《涉足荒野》(2014年电影)
I watched "Wild" Twice.
所以我们所需要的一切都在这三个包里
So, anything we might need is in these three bags.
谁想要能量棒?
Oh, hey, who wants a luna bar?
"女士专用全能营养棒"?
"Whole nutrition bar for women"?
对呀我造我看着这些包包然后看到了月亮
Yeah, I know. I looked at the packaging and saw a moon,
我就想野营耶！
And I thought "Camping!"
肯尼你不能全带挑一个吧
Kenny, you can't take all these bags. Pick one.
求你了这些包里装着
Come on, but the...these bags
求生必须的一切物资
Contain the necessary tools for survival.
我们真需要这个?
We really need this?
卡布奇诺没有泡沫的话就不像样了
I don't know how you're gonna make a cappuccino without foam,
不过我估计你们想搞当纳聚会
But, sure, I guess we're The Donner Party.
来摸摸我的手
Feel my hands.
看看多么柔软
Feel how soft my hands are.
为什么它们这么富有弹性?
Why are they so spongy?
全靠死海矿物泥
Because of the dead sea mineral mud.
我男朋友尤西在商场有一个专柜
It's in the lotion my boyfriend, Yossi,
卖♥♥这种护手霜
Sells at his kiosk in the mall.
希望他对你比上次那个
Well, hopefully he treats you better than the guy
在商场专柜卖♥♥抱枕的男朋友好
Who sells pillow pets at his kiosk in the mall.
我就是忍♥不住嘛我喜欢这一型的
I can't help it. I have a type.
哪条更好?
Which dress do you like better?
我不知道这话该怎么说
I'm not sure how to say this,
想打扮的年轻往往会事与愿违
But trying to dress younger than your age always backfires.
- 还记得我那条背带裤吗? - 永生难忘
- Remember my overalls? - I'll never forget.
你都没穿打底衫
You weren't wearing a shirt underneath.
不是我买♥♥裙子
No, the dress isn't for me.
是给莎伦坚信礼穿的
It's for Shannon's confirmation.
她在上她的最后一节课
She's at her last class right now.
虽然很难启齿但我刚刚在商场里看见她了
I hate to break it to you, but I just saw her at the mall.
真的我可不信
Oh, I seriously doubt that.
你看见的只是个长得很像莎伦的姑娘
It's probably just someone who looks like Shannon.
不可能我说"嗨莎伦" 她回我"嘿朱迪阿姨"
No, I said, "Hi, Shannon." She said, "Hey, Aunt Jodi."
然后我想安利她一些护手霜
And then I tried to sell her some lotion.
啥?
What?
我不是故意的
I'm sorry,
但是尤西要如厕
But Yossi had to go to the bathroom,
我主动提议帮他看店
And I offered to watch his kiosk.
那个专柜只有他一个人啊
I mean, he's all alone out there!
哦你是说莎伦
Oh, you're talking about the shannon thing.
大事不妙
That's not good.
啊这外面真是太热了
Ugh, it's so hot out!
我都能感到汗在我的肚脐眼上积成水池了
I can feel the sweat pooling in my belly button!
我不知道你为什么穿着牛仔裤爬山
I don't know why you chose to wear jeans on a hike,
牛仔布可是最不透气的
Denim being one of the least breathable fabrics.
为了搭配这双人字拖
I compensated with these flip-flops,
世上最透气的鞋
One of the most breathable shoes.
扛着大包感觉如何肯尼?
How you holding up back there, Kenny?
你能搞定你背后的庞然大物吗?