出柜家庭（2016）

The Real O'Neals S01E03

Part 4 Aug. 27, 2020, 11:24 a.m.

The guy from the parking lot.
哪个妈妈不会盼着这天呢?
What mother doesn't dream of this day?
你撒谎了
You lied to me,
你打破了你的誓言你发誓不再隐藏秘密的
and you broke your pledge to stop keeping secrets.
拜托!
Come on!
你唯一生气的理由就是
The only reason that you went all lent crazy
你看到我和瑞奇调情了
was because you saw Ricky and I flirting.
我的意思是
I mean, what you
你想我四月斋
really want me to give up
不要做同性恋了
for lent is being gay.
只是40天的时间而已
It's only 40 days.
根本没必要我一直就是个同性恋
Doesn't matter! I am gay all the time...
四月斋圣帕特里克节万圣节
lent, St. Patrick's Day... Halloween for gays...
对我们同性恋来说
that's like our... that's like our...
就像我们的足球节一样
our big football ti... day.
超级碗?
The Super Bowl?
生来如此!
I would have gotten it eventually!
给
Here you go.
这是什么泰瑟枪? 养老计划盒?
What's this? A taser? A retirement plan?
这是你的姨妈工具箱
That is your period tool kit.
有止痛药还有巧克力
It's got ibuprofen, a little chocolate.
我看一个叫"凯西"的四格漫画说巧克力对月经好
I read a "Cathy" Comic strip that said chocolate helps.
还有个药店的储值卡
And a drugstore gift card
因为你以后
because you should be in
得自己买♥♥女性用品
charge of your own feminine...
什么的
Wingy things.
好吗?
Okay?
哦太好了你来了
Oh, good. There you are.
我们游♥行♥少了个人
We're down one for the parade.
肯尼不来了别问为什么
Kenny's not coming. Don't ask.
莎伦呢?
Where's Shannon?
她感觉不舒服
Eh, she's not feeling too great.
我觉得她也会在家
I think she's gonna stay home.
她怎么了?
What's the matter with her?
额...她让我不要告诉你
Well, uh, she told me not to tell you this,
但她来月经了
but she got her period.
她不想告诉我?
She didn't want to tell me?
我是她妈诶!
But I'm her mother!
我知道别担心我搞定了
I know. And don't worry. I handled it.
我是在地下室知道的
And it did happen in my basement,
你让我自己处理地下室的一切事情
and you said to handle things down there.
是但不是说是我们女儿"下面的事"
Yeah, but not when it's our daughter's "Down there."
我不敢信她竟然没跟我说
I can't believe she didn't come to me.
你强调了别怀孕
Did you stress how important it is
有多重要吗?
for her not to get pregnant?
所以她才不来找你...
That's why she won't come to you...
因为你太...
because you can be a little bit...
吓人
Terrifying.
看看
Check it out.
我加了尖叫声
I added the screams of the damned.
这是啥?
What is this?
这在圣帕特里克节游♥行♥怎么合适?
How does this fit into a St. Patrick's Day parade?
- 确实不合适 - 你喜欢吗妈妈?
- It doesn't. - Do you like it, Mom?
我叫吉米把它弄得更像四月斋一样
I asked Jimmy to steer it more towards lent
让他想想如果人们不遵从上帝的指引会怎样
and what will happen if people don't get right with god.
噢我的天..
Oh, for the love of...
这对个彩车来说要求太高了艾琳
Well, that's a lot to ask of a float, Eileen.
这个很吓人又很有审判意味
It's terrifying and judgmental,
正是你要求的
which is exactly what you asked for.
我想它更严肃一点
I wanted it to be more serious
我觉得那才是我们要的
because I thought that's what we needed,
现在莎伦女生的私事也不和我说
but now Shannon won't talk to me about woman things,
肯尼偷偷摸摸的去同性恋约会
Kenny's sneaking around on gay dates.
所有的事都一团糟
Everything's going to hell.
按错了我不是故意的...
It slipped. I don't...
你想再来这吃我还挺惊讶的
I'm surprised you wanted to come back here.
你上次看起来好像不太喜欢这里的菜
You didn't seem like you liked the food that much last time.
哪有? 这是我们的地方啊
Are you kidding? This is our place.
我就是在这了解了
This is where I learned
你只喜欢吃洋蓟的一小部分
that you can't eat most of an artichoke.
那我很高兴我们又在这了
Well, I'm glad we're here.
你带我昨晚发给你的
Oh, hey, did you get that list of personal questions
私人问题单了吗?
I e-mailed you last night?
我没收完打印机没纸了
Not all of them. My printer ran out of paper.
所以我想我们可以直接聊聊
So I thought maybe we could just talk.
那遭了
Oh, bummer.
你估计没有收到
Okay, so that probably means
最后一页上
that you didn't get the last page
有我订的Lollapalooza音乐节的门票
about the tickets I found for us to Lollapalooza.
- 音乐节要五个月之后啊 - 其实是六个
- At's like five months away. - Six, actually,
但是我看了看地图如果我们走的快的话
but I looked at the map, and if we walk real fast,
我们还可以赶上拉娜·德雷和街趴乐团的表演
we can make it to Lana Del Rey and Bloc Party.
你看我知道你是新手而且很兴奋
Look, you're new at this, and... and you're excited,
这是好事
which is a good thing,
但是我们对我们关系的定位不太一样
but I'm in a different place than you.
我...本来...希望来享受初识的兴奋
And... Like, I... I was hoping it was just first-date jitters,
但是我意识到
but I'm realizing that, you know,
你需要一个和你差不多的人
you need to date someone who's more where you are.
瑞奇不断的解释
Ricky kept talking and explaining
他决定背后的各种原因
all the reasons for his decision,
我是我已经听了所有我需要听的了
but I'd heard everything I needed to hear.
我迎接了我的第一次约会和第一次被拒绝
I'd had my first date and my first rejection.
我现在只需要个高雅一点的退场语
I just needed a classy exit line.
我的尿快到喉咙了
I've got to pee so bad I can taste it.
你在这坐着干嘛?
Why are you sitting out here?
看样子我们家今年
It doesn't seem like The O'Neals
是参加不了游♥行♥了
are gonna make the parade this year.
你跟你的停车场绅士玩得愉快吗?
Did you have a good time with your parking-lot gentleman?
挺... 砸的
That was... that was kind of a bust, too.
这是不是意味着你试过了但是不合适
Does that mean you tried it and it didn't work out
所以你打算变回来了?
and now you're gonna go back to the other thing?
不是这样的
That's not how it works.
你想谈谈吗?
Do you want to talk about it?
不
No.
要是我保证我会特别
Well, would you want to talk about it
特别努力不评头论足
if I promise to try really, really hard
你会愿意谈谈吗?
not to be judgmental?
并不全因为是四月斋...
And not just because it's lent...
是我真的想你能跟我谈天说话
because I really want you to be able to talk to me.
我终于有了个喜欢的人但他却不喜欢我
I finally liked a guy, and he didn't like me back.
如果他不喜欢你
Well, if he didn't like you back,
他明显是个蠢货而且没品位
then he's obviously stupid and has no taste.
你为什么一定要跟一个又蠢又没品位
Why would you want to date a stupid boy with no taste
整天住在一个停车场里的男孩约会呢?
who lives in a parking lot and accosts innocent people
他还骚扰来买♥♥东西的路人
who are just trying to buy crafts?
我真的特别爱说别人而且特别可怕是吗?
Am I really judgmental and terrifying?
你真的是
You are.
但是这次你用你的能力做了好事
But this time, you used your powers for good.
他都不吃肉
I mean, he doesn't eat meat.
为了四月斋?
You mean for lent?
不是从来不吃
No, like, ever.
这样啊他会孤独终老的
Well, he's gonna die alone.
妈你得过来看看
Hey, Mom, you got to come check this out.
爸他们来了
Hey, Dad, here they come!
吉米我们俩把吓人的东西都弄下来了
Jimmy and I stripped off all the scary stuff.
留了路西法
Well, except Lucifer.
因为... 我钉得太紧了
I... I used, uh, too many nails.
我觉得能行啊
I think it's okay.
我搞定了
I think I made it work,
我们还是能去游♥行♥的
and we should still go to the parade.
妈你怎么看?