极品老妈

Mom S04E22

Part 3 Jan. 3, 2020, 10:31 p.m.

I do all those things!
我只是不拿出来炫耀
I just don't brag about it.
我很谦虚
I'm humble.
好吧去你们的
All right, screw all of you!
你能相信这景色吗
You believe this view?
难怪有钱人小瞧我们
I get why rich people look down on us.
因为看起来真小
It's 'cause they really do.
这些都是装模作样
This is all pretentious crap.
瞧啊
Oh, look,
我可以把白兰地装在水晶瓶里
I can keep brandy in a crystal decanter
适度地饮酒
and drink moderately.
以后我也想坐在这样的办公室里
Someday I want to sit in an office like this,
穿着香奈儿西装拿着普拉达包
wearing a Chanel suit and a Prada bag,
同时帮助穷♥人♥
all the while helping the poor.
如果你打算帮助穷♥人♥
If you plan on helping the poor,
那包肯定是假货
that bag's gonna be a knock-off.
雷
Hi, Ray.
克丽丝蒂很高兴见到你
Christy, good to see you.
邦妮
Hi, Bonnie.
跟国税局有点麻烦是吧
So, little trouble with the IRS, huh?
是啊我搞砸了
Yes, I screwed up,
孤儿院没教税法
but they didn't cover tax law in the orphanage.
你从未去过孤儿院
You were never in an orphanage.
这是诗的破格
It's poetic license.
这样吧也许我们该先谈谈
You know what, maybe we should talk about
显而易见的问题
the elephant in the room first.
问题是我们的妈妈抛弃了我
The elephant being I was abandoned by our mother
而留下了你吗
and you were kept?
邦妮我懂你受到了不公平待遇
Bonnie, I get it. You got a raw deal.
但你明白直到三个月前
But you do understand I didn't know you existed
我才意识到有你这个人吧
until three months ago?
我知道只是
I know that. It's just...
瞧瞧你的人生
I mean, look what you've done with your life,
再看看我的
and look at mine.
这是谁你的男友吗
I mean, who is this, your boyfriend?
他是模特吗
What is he, a model?
他是我丈夫是模特
He's my husband. And yes.
拜托
Oh, come on.
抱歉这对你来说很痛苦
Look, I'm sorry this has been so painful for you.
也许你的税收问题也有好处
But maybe there's a silver lining in your tax problems.
我们可以借此来了解对方
We can use this to get to know each other,
做好姐弟
be brother and sister.
你怎么能不喜欢他啊
How can you not like this guy?
我都能想办法不喜欢你而你这么萌
I find ways not to like you, and you're adorable.
邦妮让我帮你
Bonnie, let me help you.
不附加条件
No strings attached.
好吧但你欠我个人情
All right, but you owe me one.
等等为什么
Wait, why would I...
算了
Never mind.
帮我弄弄明白
So clear this up for me.
哪种人20年不纳税啊
What kind of a person doesn't pay taxes for 20 years?
我喜欢自认为是民族英雄
Well, I like to think of myself as a folk hero.
你把没付给政♥府♥的钱
So the money you didn't pay the government
给了穷♥人♥吗
you gave to the poor?
作为一个穷♥人♥ 是的
Well, speaking as a poor person, yes.
好吧我跟你说我们要怎么做
All right, I'll tell you what we're gonna do.
下周我们去国税局
We'll go to the IRS next week
想办法达成协议
and try to cut some kind of a deal.
看见你有真律师时会发生什么吗
See what happens when you have a real lawyer?
别这么谦虚
Oh, don't be so humble.
我要用你的笔记
I'm gonna be using your notes.
真的吗
Really?
你做得很好
You did some nice work in here.
实际上
In fact,
我回国税局时你也跟着一起来吧
when I go back to the IRS, why don't you come with me?
你没必要这样做
You don't have to do that.
我没在帮你忙你会对我有帮助
I'm not doing you a favor. You'd be a big help.
太棒了我很乐意跟你们去
That's great. I'd love to join you guys.
她不去
Oh, she's not going.
是吗
I'm not?
天啊绝对不要
Oh, God, no.
这是你犯的唯一一个错
That's really the only mistake you made.
真的吗我危在旦夕之际
Seriously? You're just gonna watch hockey
你就打算看冰球吗
while my life hangs in the balance?
我有点难踱步邦
Kind of hard for me to pace, Bon.
我只是想告诉你如果我进了监狱
I just want you to know if I go to jail,
你得再找个女友
you need to find someone else.
我不希望你等我
I don't want you to wait for me.
好
Okay.
拜托你都不骗我吗
Come on. You're not even gonna lie to me?
这是季后赛邦我没听
It's a playoff game, Bon. I'm not really listening.
可能是克丽丝蒂
Ooh, this could be Christy.
该死吉尔
Damn it, Jill.
不我不要把你介绍给我同母异父的基佬弟弟
No, I am not introducing you to my half-gay brother.
难以置信我们胜诉了
I can't believe we won!
严格说来我们没胜诉
Well, technically, we didn't win.
我们和解了
We settled.
在我家和解就是胜诉了
In my family, settling is winning.
我要打给我妈妈告诉她
I'm gonna call my mom and let her know.
等等
Whoa, hold on.
第一课绝对不要告诉客户
Lesson number one: never tell the client
你只花了15分钟就做完了一天的工作
it took 15 minutes to do a day's work.
叫"计时收费"是有原因的
They're called "Billable hours" for a reason.
我们就该让她在家坐着出冷汗吗
So we're just supposed to let her sit at home and sweat?
仔细想想吧
Think about it.
天啊我迫不及待要当律师了
Oh, man, I can't wait to be a lawyer.
你会成为一名好律师的
And you're gonna be a good one.
实际上
As a matter of fact,
如果没有更好的律所把你抢走
if you don't get snatched up by a better firm,
也许你可以来为我做实习生
maybe you could come intern for me.
我很乐意
I would love that.
就这么说定了
Consider it done.
大部分律所不是禁止裙带关系吗
Don't most firms have a policy about nepotism?
克丽丝蒂
Christy...
看看我们
look at us.
你说得对我想我们可以不被发现
You're right, I think we're gonna get away with it.
还有你们所有人从未放弃我
And to all of you, for never giving up on me,
我从心底里道谢
from the bottom of my heart, thank you.
亚当
Adam,
我的爱人
my love.
我女儿克丽丝蒂
My daughter, Christy.
我亲爱的朋友们
My dear friends.
没有你们的支持我做不到
I couldn't have done it without your support.
她是觉得自己获奖了吗
Does she think she won an award?
多谢我失散多年的弟弟雷
And thanks to my long-lost brother Ray,
国税局给我十年时间付清债务
the IRS is giving me ten years to pay off my debt.
真是一群蠢货
What a bunch of suckers.
总之很高兴我们终于有机会
Anyway, I'm glad we're finally getting a chance
好好了解一下了
to know each other.
是啊
Yes, we are.
谢谢你邦妮
Thank you, Bonnie.
我不由自主地想着你和克丽丝蒂
I can't help thinking that you and Christy
来到我的生活之中
coming into my life...
也许不是个巧合
maybe it wasn't a coincidence.
也许是有原因的
Maybe there's a reason for it.
天啊真难开口
Boy, this is hard to say,
但我想最好是跟你们说
but I guess you're probably the best people to say it to.
我如今已经
I've gotten to a point where...
每天都吸可♥卡♥因♥
I'm snorting coke every day.
-欢迎来到我们家我们在 -过来弟弟
- Welcome to the family! We're here! - Come here, little brother.
真棒