退休警察烦事多（2016）

Kevin Can Wait S01E16

Part 3 Aug. 10, 2020, 2:49 p.m.

But if you think my age is a problem...
-你有孩子气的魅力 -完全不是
- You've got a boyish charm. - ?No! Not at all.
当然如果我
Definitely. I mean, if I --
如果我染发再穿上紧身牛仔裤
If I dye my hair ?and throw on some skinny jeans,
和摇滚乐队"火柴盒20"里的那个人一模一样
I look exactly like the guy from Matchbox 20.
不可思议
It's uncanny.
吸气
Breathe in.
呼气
And exhale.
好了
And that's it.
结束了
You're all done.
你太厉害了
You -- You're amazing.
谢谢
Thanks.
出去的时候拿些手工自♥制♥的香蕉面包
Oh, uh, make sure to grab some homemade banana bread on your way out.
我会的
I will.
你在这里
There he is!
你来做什么
What are you doing here?
我来看看你是否有空
I-I just came to see if you had an opening,
但他们说你今天不上班
but, uh, they said that you were off today, so, uh...
今天我通常做文书工作
Today's the day ?I usually do office work.
我可以为你挤出时间
I could make some time for you.
不要不要你做你的事
No, no, no, no! You, uh -- You do your thang.
我下次再打你电♥话♥
I'll just give you a call another time.
给你做治疗我肯定能挤出时间
I always got time ?to make an adjustment for you.
得让你为击球练习做好准备
We got to get you ready for batting practice, huh?
-是 -你直说就行
- Yes. - You've just got to say the word.
直说
The word.
老天
Oh, gosh.
亲爱的床下没有巧克力豆了
Honey, there are no more M&M's under the bed.
我今早吸尘了
I vacuumed this morning.
他又按坏我了唐娜
He did it to me again, Donna!
什么
What?!
亲爱的他今天不是不上班吗
Oh, honey! But he was supposed to be off today.
我知道但显然我是VIP
Oh, yeah, I know, ?but apparently, I'm a V.I.P.!
还有厉害的我走的时候
And here's the kicker -- as I'm walking away,
他发现我的髋骨不对
he notices one of my hips is out of line.
他说你得预约明天再来
So, he says, "You got to make an appointment for tomorrow""
我不去唐娜我不干了
I'm not going, Donna. I'm not doing it.
亲爱的你必须去
Honey, you have to.
我今天和杰姬聊过
I talked to Jackie today.
他们让我们下周住他们佛州的房♥子
They're gonna let us use their place in Florida next week,
我单位上也休假了
and I got the time off of work,
肯德拉会照顾弟妹亲爱的
and Kendra's gonna watch the kids and, babe,
我真的很想要这次海滩度假
I really want this beach vacation.
你想要你去找捏爆骨医生
You want it? ?You go to Dr. Cracks-A-Lot.
好的好的我去
All right, fine. Yes, I will.
说实话我觉得你有点夸张
I mean, honestly, I think you're exaggerating a little bit.
凯文今天不能来太遗憾了
Well, that's too bad ?Kevin couldn't make it today.
我身体有些僵硬
No, you know, I was actually a little stiff,
他把治疗机会给我了
so he gave me his appointment.
-真是大方 -对
- What a generous guy. - Yeah.
深吸一口气
Okay, take a nice, deep breath in.
然后呼气
And ex...hale!
这一下挺不错的感觉到了吗
Oh, you got some nice movement there. You feel that?
是的
Yes.
你肩膀上有只瓢虫
Got a little ladybug on your shoulder.
什么
What?
呼气
And ex...hale!
治疗怎么样
How'd your adjustment go?
很好皮特很棒
Oh, fine. Peter's great.
只是
It's just...
你真没用
You're such a baby.
过来坐我旁边
Why don't come on over and have a seat with me?
你走路的样子很怪
You're walking kind of funny.
没就是走路你看我的样子很怪
Nope. Just -- Just walking. You're looking at me funny.
少来了
Cut it out.
对了
Oh, there you go.
好了
All right, fine!
亲爱的他把我按坏了
Oh, baby, he mangled me!
我跟你说了会这样
Yeah, I told you this would happen!
所以我不喜欢新朋友
This is why I don't like new people!
至少我们可以去佛州了不用谢
Well, at least I got us our Florida trip, so you're welcome.
好
Yeah.
不
Oh, no.
如果你还有点爱我你就起来开门
If you love me at all, you will get up and answer that.
我已经跟脚说了站起来它们没反应
I already spoke to my feet. They're not responding.
拜托
Oh, come on.
-进来 -进来
- Come in! - ?Come in!
我想着把公♥寓♥需要的东西给你们拿来
So, I thought I'd drop off everything you need for the condo.
都在这里停车证地图
It's all in here -- parking pass, maps, and uhh --
我得请你们帮个忙
Ooh, I have a favor to ask,
你们可以拒绝
and you can totally say "No."
我女儿演奏小提琴
So, my daughter plays the violin, and it's kind of --
-不 -闭嘴
- No. ?- Shut up.
老凯他开玩笑的
Kev -- He's kidding.
继续说
Oh. ?Keep going.
她今晚要演出
Well, she's got this recital tonight and, well,
我不想做那种妈妈但我们想
I hate to be "That kind of mom"" But we would just love
邀请你们去看
to have you guys there in the crowd.
不用说了我们会去
Say no more. We'll be there.
-太好了 -好的
- Great. - Okay, perfect.
我走了你们不必送因为你们...
So, do I see myself out, 'cause you guys are --
-你走吧 -门在那里
- You can do it. - The door's still there.
进来
Come in!
咋样啊家里人
What up, family?
凯尔叔叔你做了什么
Uncle Kyle, what did you do?
我不知道你在说什么
I don't know what you're talking about.
我想她说的是发型衣服
I think she's talking about the hair, the outfit,
还有吓人的蓝眼
and the shockingly blue eyes.
这是美瞳
These are contacts.
颜色是冰蓝
The color is called "Ice blue"...
很多人说我像年轻的丹尼尔·克雷格[现任007]
and a lot of people say I look like a young Daniel Craig.
或是年老的西伯利亚哈士奇
Or an old Siberian husky.
我一直在写祝酒辞
I've been working on your toast,
我先让你们尝尝鲜
and I'd like to give you a little taste
看看味道如何
to see what you'd be getting.
好的
Okay.
欢迎大家我是凯尔·盖布伴郎
"Welcome, everyone. I'm Kyle Gable, the best man.
我要怎么形容肯德拉和切尔呢
What can I say about Kendra and Chale?
世间最幸运的两个孩子找到了真爱
Two of the luckiest kids in the world that found true love""
我也找到过真爱我想娶她
"I found love, once. I wanted to marry her,
但她说没感觉
but she said she wasn't... feeling it.
向前看布兰达
Moving on, Brenda.
我希望你和泰德真的开心
I hope you and Ted are really happy,
我不在乎他拥有多少家运动品牌店
and I don't care how many Lady Foot Lockers he owns.
没错在亚普汉克你妈家外
And, yes, that was me watching you
看你的人是我
outside your mom's house in Yaphank."
好了凯尔叔叔
Okay, Uncle Kyle!
我想我们尝到味道了
You know, uh, yeah, ?I think we get the flavor of it.
很多味道
A lot of flavor, right there.
你们不喜欢
You hate it?
我就知道
I knew it.
我太刻意了
I-I was squeezing the bat too hard.
难怪我从来没做过伴郎
No wonder I've never been a best man.
做不成我兄弟的伴郎现在又做不成你们的
I blew it with my brother, and now I blew it with you guys.
不凯尔叔叔别走
No, Uncle Kyle, stop.
我们希望你能做伴郎
We want you to be the best man.
什么
What?
我很荣幸有你支持我
I would be honored to have you stand up for me.
任何愿意这样牺牲的人
Anyone that's willing to go through all...that
会做一个非常优秀的伴郎
would be a brilliant best man.
我们会帮你写祝酒辞