退休警察烦事多（2016）

Kevin Can Wait S02E08

Part 2 Aug. 11, 2020, 9:04 a.m.

从现在起
Starting now.
所以如果有人今天踩到芝士摔倒了
Okay, so if somebody slips in hot cheese today,
我们就没事
we're good.
好吧你可以损我我活该
Okay, I will give you that. I deserve it.
我只是担心他会不会告我们
I am just worried about his whole suing us.
他不会告我们的相信我
He's not gonna sue us. Believe me.
我了解他知道吗
I know him, all right?
真的吗有多了解
Really? Okay. How well?
非常了解我非常了解他
Very well. I know him very well.
他是我邻居他是...荷兰人
He's my neighbor, all right? He's... Dutch.
非常了解非常了解
Lot of stuff, lot of stuff.
-没错 -是吗
- Yeah. - Yeah?
他姓什么
What's his last name?
我不想打探他的私事好吗
You know, I don't like to pry into his personal affairs, okay?
相信我他不会有事的
Believe me -- he's gonna be fine.
我们也不会有事的
We're gonna be fine.
他随时会从那扇门进来
He's gonna come through that door any minute
手里拿着盒甜甜圈像骏马一般强健
with a box of doughnuts, healthy as a horse, okay?
-人呢人呢 -他来了吧
- Hello, hello. - There he is, all right?
我说什么来着
What'd I say, huh?
抱歉我迟到了我早上去做了核磁共振
Sorry I'm late. I had an MRI this morning.
结果不太好
Not good.
我买♥♥了甜甜圈
I brought doughnuts.
我说对了一半
I was half right.
他在做什么
What is-What is he doing?
他在拍照好传到脸书上
Oh, he's taking pictures for Facebook.
脸书
Facebook?
他就是在那摔倒的
That's exactly where he fell.
他在拍摄事故现场
He is documenting the scene.
不不是的
No, he's not.
等一下
Wait a second.
他在拍炖锅的照片
He's taking pictures of the Crock-Pot.
你认为那是为了告我们用的吗
You think that's for, like, a lawsuit or something?
不他拍炖锅的照片不过是因为
No, no, he's just taking a picture of the Crock-Pot
他想买♥♥个一模一样的
'cause he wants one just like it.
当然是为了告我们
Yes, it's for the lawsuit.
鲁特格尔亲爱的
Rootger? Honey?
你为什么要拍炖锅的照片
W-Why are you taking a picture of the Crock-Pot?
它是嫌疑人吗
Is it a suspect?
我说过了是为了发到脸书上
I told you, it's for Facebook --
社交媒体啊
social media.
谁会在脸书上发炖锅的照片
Who puts pictures of a Crock-Pot on Facebook?
其实我就发过一次是我做的辣椒酱
Actually, I did once. I made chili.
收到了一百多个赞呢
Got over 100 likes. I mean...
有个人说他不喜欢但他是个嫉妒的喷子
One guy said he hated it, but he was a jealous idiot.
我把他丫的屏蔽了
Blocked his ass.
行了别再说...
Okay, enough about the...
如果他告我们
Hey, if he did come after us,
那是只涉及公♥司♥利益
would it just be, like, a business thing
还是会影响我的个人财富
or could it affect my personal wealth?
他可能会瞄上你的股权和资产
He could go after your stock options and assets.
我要是你就把你的游艇
If I were you, I would move your yacht
立即开到公海上去
into international waters immediately.
好吧
Okay, fine.
这样如何
How about this?
我们...我们告诉他
We just -- we tell him
我们要做个员工考核之类的
we're gonna do, like, an employee review
我们叫他进来套他的话
and we call him in here and get him to talk.
-好好主意 -好吧
- Yes. Good idea. - All right?
很好好的
Yes. Good, okay.
-鲁特格尔 -鲁特格尔
- Uh, Rootger? - Rootger.
鲁特格尔能麻烦你过来一下吗
Rootger, uh, could we just see you one second, please?
-我现在行动很困难 -是啊
- It's very difficult. - Yeah.
是啊知道了
Yeah... okay.
首先我们想感谢你对公♥司♥的贡献
First off, we want to just thank you for your service here.
是的非常感谢你
Yes, thank you very much.
我们现在要做的
And what we're doing now
我们基本上要...
is we're basically just gonna do, like...
我们平时有个六周员工考核
what we do -- it's our six-week employee review, you know?
在荷兰通常是六个月一考核
Oh. In Holland, it's usually six months.
欢迎来到美国伙计
Well, welcome to America, buddy.
-破规矩特多 -是啊
- Lot of red tape. - Yeah.
那么你会怎样描述
So, um, how would you describe
你在猴拳的工作体验
your experience here at Monkey Fist?
非常好我特别喜欢在这工作
Excellent. I like working here very much.
但没有什么让你不满的地方吗
But is there anything that, uh, bothers you?
有一件事
Oh, there's this one thing,
但我不想让任何人不快
but, you know, I don't want to upset anyone.
不鲁特格尔这里是安全地带
No, Rootger, look, this is a safe place.
你想说什么都行明白吗
You can say whatever you want, okay?
好的我希望在点午餐时
Okay, I wish when we order lunch,
你能考虑点些素食
you would consider vegetarian options.
不不行不
No! No way! No! No!
-那样的话我三点又饿了 -好了好了
- Then I'm hungry again by 3:00. - Okay. All right.
-我们别跑题行吗 -素食满足不了我
- Can we focus? Focus, focus. - And it doesn't fulfill me.
-别跑题 -可我会饿
- Focus. - But I'm hungry.
好吧
Okay.
那么鲁特格尔
So, Rootger,
你还有其他不满的地方吗
is there anything else that you want to talk about?
没有一切都很好
No, everything's great.
除了我昨天狠狠摔了一跤
I mean, except for that hideous fall I took yesterday.
其实"狠狠"这个词不太准确
Okay, well, "hideous" is a strong word, you know.
我看更像是"我摔倒了是我不好"
I mean, I see it more of, like, a "Whoops! I fell. My bad."
是的我想我们真正想知道的是
Yes, I guess what we really want to know is,
你近期的发展计划是什么
where do you see yourself in the near future?
那是个好问题
That's a good question.
你这么问真巧最近我一直在想
Oh, funny you say that. Lately, I've been thinking,
"鲁特格尔·范德坎普能有怎样的发展"
"What does the future hold for Rootger Vanderkamp?"
"范德坎普"
"Vanderkamp."
这下知道了
Nice.
那答案是什么
And, uh, and what's the answer?
我想努力工作
Well, I want to work hard
利用每一个我遇到的机会
and take advantage of every opportunity that comes my way.
好的 "利用机会" 好的
Oh, yeah. "Take advantage." Okay.
那好我想我们没有其他要问的了
Well, okay, I think we got everything that we needed.
太好了
Great.
可能这样更简单些
This might be easier.
你听到了吗
Did you hear that?
素食门都没有
Vegetarian? It's not happening.
我不能收人家的钱
I can't take people's money.
我根本还不是律师呢
I mean, I'm not even a lawyer yet.
标志上写了
Oh, the sign says that --
用小字写的
in the fine print.
亲爱的重点不是钱
And, darling, it's not about the money.
是给无助的人帮助
It is about giving a voice to the voiceless.
只要他们买♥♥披萨就行
As long as they buy pizza.
是的你唯一要做的
Yeah, yeah, all you got to do is
就是给同胞传播一些法律知识
sprinkle a little legal knowledge to your fellow man
然后小费大增
and rake in your tips.
那好吧但要低调些
All right, fine! But just keep it low-key.
没问题
Absolutely.
一片披萨加法律咨♥询♥ 五美元
好到谁了
All right, who's up?
那好伙计你有两分钟时间
All right, pal, you got two minutes, okay?
当你听到这个声音
When you hear this...
咨♥询♥就结束了明白吗
...session's over, all right?
你移步到那边
You move down the line,
那个面色苍白的英国小子会给你披萨
you collect your slice from the pale-lookin' Brit.
告诉我你们发现了什么
All right. So, what did you guys find out?
鲁特格尔有没有找律师
Rootger seeing a lawyer?
我们跟了他整个上午