9号秘事

是啊 如果我没记错 她戏份少得可怜
Yeah, and if I remember rightly, she was hardly in it.
她得奖是因为她是尚娜·安德鲁斯
She won it because she's Shona Andrews
如果她某年演了某部作品
and it is completely unacceptable
却不给她颁个奖 那是完全不可接受的
to not give her an award if she's been in a programme that year.
拜托 这么说不公平
Oh come on, that's not fair,
她获奖是因为她天资过人
she wins because she's an exceptional talent.
我没否认这点
I'm not denying that,
但如果我是在家观看颁奖礼的观众
but equally my heart would sink a little bit
发现她又上台领奖 我会觉得索然无味
if I was watching this on telly and she gets up again.
-他说的有道理 -我同意 真的太过了
- He's got a point. - I agree, it's too much.
各位 这简直是胡说八道
Oh, guys, this is rubbish.
我的意思是 我们能不能做一个
All I am saying is can we be the jury
不要因为尚哪·安德鲁斯存在
that doesn't just hand the award to
就直接把奖颁给她的评审团
Shona Andrews simply for existing?
那我们来投票吧
Well, let's take a vote.
同意将尚娜从获奖名单中剔除的人请举手
All those in favour of removing Shona from the list.
多数人都同意
Well, that's a majority.
那么尚娜被剔除了
Shona is off the list.
不过能被提名已经非常了不起了
Though still a very great honour to be nominated.
好了 如果能再剔除一个就好极了
Right, if we could lose one more, that would be great.
再回顾一遍大家对安娜的评价
let's recap what was said about Anna.
鲁伯特没被她的表演打动 觉得她也口齿不清
Rupert wasn't impressed, thought she was another mumbler.
克莱夫说她棒极了 非常真实
Clive said she was fantastic, great authenticity.
戈登觉得她驾驭不了那个角色
Gordon thought she was out of her depth.
克莱夫后来改变主意 同意戈登的意见
Clive then changed his mind and agreed with Gordon.
-我有权更改 -行了 剔除她吧 赶紧完事
- I'm allowed. - Yeah, she's gone, let's wrap this up.
你不能催促大家 这可是非常重大的决定
You can't hurry this, these are such important decisions.
是啊 我真是迫不及待想知道
Yeah, cos I can't wait to find out
是谁赢了构建现实奖呢
who won Constructed Reality
好吧 那这么说吧
Right, well, let's put it this way, then.
有人觉得安娜贡献了最佳表演吗
Does anybody think Anna gave the best performance?
那么 她也只是一个获提名者 并非得奖者
In that case, she's another worthy nominee, but not our winner.
现在只剩下最后两位了
So, it comes down to these two.
多洛希女爵 评价包括 「国家瑰宝」
Dame Dorothy, "A national treasure",
「闪耀」 偷走了宝拉的心
"Twinkly", stole Paula's heart,
凯莉也偷走了宝拉的心
and Kelly also stole Paula's heart.
-她们都做到了 -「非常感人」
- They all did. - "Very moving",
「平胸」 不过这与评奖不太相关吧
"Flat-chested" - not sure that's really relevant.
或许有点太肥皂剧了 但是
A bit soapy, perhaps, but -
我觉得接下来这点很重要
and this is very important, I think -
她确实让杰姬和她妈哭出来了
she did make Jackie and her mum cry.
那这样几乎是定下了
Well, that just about nails it, then.
能快速举手表决一下吗
So, can we take a quick show of hands,
好了解一下现在的情况
just to get the temperature of the room?
支持凯莉的请举手
All those for Kelly.
支持多洛希女爵的呢
And for Dame Dorothy?
现在两位女士每人都有三票
So, both ladies have three votes each.
天呐 我刚叫了车
Oh, Jesus Christ, I just requested my Uber.
能别尊称为「女士」吗 一副居高临下的态度
Can we not call them ladies, please? It's really patronising.
-那该叫什么 袋鼠吗 -她们是演员
- What are they then, kangaroos? - They're actors.
-是女演员 -我也不喜欢这这个词
- Well, actresses. - I don't like that either.
算了 我改票
OK, you know what? I switch.
-什么 -我刚刚投给谁了
- Sorry? - Who did I vote for?
直接改成另一个就行了
Just change it to the other one.
好了 现在凯莉四票 多洛希两票
All right, so now it's four to Kelly and two to Dorothy.
你不能这么做 宝拉 这不公平
You can't do that, Paula, that's unfair.
你瞧好了
Watch me.
等等 如果她要改为支持凯莉
Well, hold on, if she's changing to Kelly,
那我就改为支持多洛希女爵
I'm changing to Dame Dotty.
-天呐 -现在又是三平了
- Oh, for goodness' sake. - So, it's back to three-all.
好吧 我也改投给多洛希
Yes, I switch to Dorothy as well.
那就是多洛希四票 凯莉两票
Now that's four to Dorothy and two to Kelly.
该死的 克莱夫 你能有点主见吗
For God's sake, Clive, will you stand on your own two feet?
-但我同意你的看法啊 -别
- But I'm agreeing with you. - Well, don't.
我不会拍你写的剧的 好吗
I'm not going to do your script, OK?
-什么 -《血橙》 我昨晚看过了
- What? - Blood Oranges, I read it last night.
就是《军情五处》的改写版 烂得跟屎一样
It's just a rehash of Spooks, it's shit.
哪点烂 我会改的
Well, which bit? I'll change it.
-全都很烂 -那我改为支持凯莉
- All of it. - Well, I switch to Kelly, then.
你们必须尊重投票过程
You have to respect the process.
现在又是三平了
And it's three-all again.
能最后投一次吗
Can we just do the final vote, please?
卡里德的车两分钟后就到
Khalid is two minutes away.
何不直接给多蒂算了
Why don't you just give it to Dotty?
你不是已经「给」过她了吗
I thought you already had.
没错 所以他的票不算数
Exactly, his vote shouldn't be counted.
没错 那就是多洛希两票 凯莉三票
Oh, yes, so that's two to Dorothy and three to Kelly.
简直胡说八道
What a load of bollocks.
如果你们不想要专业意见
If you don't want the professional opinion,
在这行50年的经验
50 years' experience,
那你不如去问一个无知的死忠电视观众
you may as well ask some witless couch potato
他们希望谁获奖
who they want to win.
杰姬就是这样的人啊
Well, we do have Jackie with us.
杰姬 你有什么看法吗
Jackie, is there anything you'd like to add to the debate?
没有 谢谢
No, it's all right.
任何意见都行
Every opinion is valid.
哪怕是你的意见
Even yours.
我没你们这么聪明
I'm not clever like all of you.
我以前都不知道还得考虑
I didn't realise you had to think about
这么多外部因素
all these other outside things,
比如她们的年纪
like how old they are,
她们过往已经拿过多少奖了
or how many other awards they've won...
或谁在这行受不受欢迎
Or who's popular in the industry.
这对那些女士不公平 抱歉 是演员
It's not fair on the ladies - sorry, the actors -
不该由我这样的人来评价她们
to have someone like me passing judgment.
我还是走吧 不打扰你们做决定了
I think I'm just going to go and leave you all to it,
不好意思
if you don't mind.
我真是太丢人现眼了 对不起
I've made a fool of myself. I'm so sorry.
邀请大众参与 就是会出现这种情况
Well, that's what happens when you invite the public.
好了 分发一下电子投票器吧
Right, erm, shall we dish out the electronic devices?
记住 这些会记入你们最终的投票结果
Remember, these will lock in your final vote.
现在只剩五个人了 所以不可能是平局
As there are only five of you left, there's no chance of a tie.
最佳女演员
我得走了
Well, I've got to go.
很荣幸跟大家合作
It's been a pleasure.
如果你们想去剧院度过糟心的一夜
If you want a lousy night at the theatre,
下个月去特拉法尔加剧院吧
come to the Trafalgar Studios next month
演出后再帮我借酒浇愁
and help me drown my sorrows in the bar afterwards.
好啊 我很乐意
Yes, I'd love to do that.
我们应该交换下电♥话♥号♥码
We should swap numbers.
我得去参加一个看片会 所以...
Well, I've got a screening to get to, so, er...
继续好好努力吧 各位
Keep up the good work, everyone.
等不及要看你们的下部作品了
Can't wait to see what you all do next.
有谁想去「骑师与马」酒吧
Anyone fancy a swift debriefing session
随便跟那里的人聊聊吗 戈登你去吗
down at the Coach and Horses? Gordon?
不了 谢谢
No, thanks.
如果尚娜·安德鲁斯推掉了 那试试凯莉·马斯顿
If Shona Andrews passes, let's try Kelly Marsden.
我愿意去 我眼下穷得都快没裤子穿了
I'll come. Er, I've not got much cash on me at the moment.
编剧都穷困潦倒 我请你
Typical bloody writer, I'll treat you.
其实我的《血橙》里有个角色
There's actually a part in Blood Oranges
非常适合你 不知你愿不愿意看看剧本
you would be perfect for, if you wouldn't mind reading it.
-是吗 -目前设定的是个30岁的日本女人
- Oh, yes? - It's a 30-year-old Japanese woman at the moment,
不过我不介意改一下设定
but I don't mind changing it...
最佳女演员 正在计票...
抱歉 我忘记拿手♥机♥了
Sorry, forgot my phone.
杰姬
Oh, Jackie.
但愿你不会觉得太受伤
I hope that wasn't too bruising for you.
这帮搞艺术的有时就是喜怒无常 脾气古怪
These artistic types can be fairly temperamental,
我相信你一定也知道
as I'm sure you're aware.
你知道获奖者是谁了吗
So, do you know who won?
是的 我相信你一定会很满意的
Yes, and I think you'll be satisfied.