9号秘事

(欢聚如梦)
(当季不开放)
劳伦斯
Laurence!
天哪
Oh, my God!
你还好吗
How are you?
你好 卡勒姆
Hey, Callum!
你气色不错
You're looking good!
我最后一次见到你是在本世纪吧
I think the last time I saw you was this century, wasn't it?
没错 肯齐的婚礼 在2010年6月
It was. Kenzie's wedding, so June 2010.
是吗
Was it really?
天哪 可怜的老肯齐
Yeah. God, poor old Kenzie.
他的妻子才可怜
Poor Kenzie's wife.
确实 他们还在一起吗
Well, quite. Are they still together?
不在了 他现在住在德国
No, no, no. He lives in Germany now.
我们在脸书网加上了好友
We're Facebook friends.
是吗 我从来不用社交网络那些破玩意
Are you? Well, you know, I don't do any of that social media crap.
我看出来了
No, I noticed.
你不太愿意上领英网 我加了你几次都没通过
You didn't want to be LinkedIn, in spite of several attempts.
你的心意我领了 劳伦斯 但我的年龄太大了
Bless you for trying, Laurence, but I'm too old.
更喜欢与人面对面地交流
I prefer seeing people face-to-face.
每12年交流一次
Every 12 years.
正是如此
Exactly.
总之
Anyway,
-你能帮我推一下吗 -好
-Can you give me a hand with this?-Yeah!
这里好安静啊
It's very quiet.
你没有刻意找借口把我骗到这里来吧
You haven't lured me here under false pretences, have you?
这里在冬天不对外开放
Closed for the winter.
由邦妮的一个朋友负责管理 她把钥匙给了我
A friend of Bonnie's runs it. She let me have the key.
邦妮怎么样 我们今天能见到她吗
How is Bonnie? Will we get to see her today?
能 她稍后就来
Ah, yeah. Yeah, she'll be...here later.
你的另一半怎么样了
How's...your partner?
你说帕布萝吗
Pablo?
我们还算过得下去
Oh, you know, we muddle through.
现在正在网上学习视觉艺术
He's doing an online course in fine art at the moment,
我听不太懂 不过没关系
which is bewildering to me, but never mind.
-我对象会喜欢这里的 -没错 这里很美
-He'd have loved this.-Yeah. Beautiful, isn't it?
有没有想起过去的美好时光
Remind you of the good old days?
哪段美好时光
Which good old days?
大学
Uni!
我们过去常在湖边散步
We used to go for those big walks round the lake.
是啊 想起来一点
Yeah. A little bit.
现在很少有地方能让你真正感到平静
So few places nowadays where you can actually find peace.
喂 小腊肠
Oi, oi, saveloy!
天哪 你从来没有告诉过我达伦要来
Oh, Jesus, you never told me Darren was coming.
我说过这是一场团聚 你好 达扎
I told you it was a reunion. Hi, Dazza!
太好了 兄弟们 近来怎样
All right, lads? How are we?
过来 我们拥抱一下
Come here! Give us a hug!
见到你真好 兄弟
Ohhh! So good to see you, mate!
见到你也是
Yeah, you too.
你还戴着那条旧的大学围巾 真是老土
Hey, you've still got the old university scarf, you saddo!
这是我的第三条了 样式一直在更新
This is my third one. They keep updating it.
这条的条纹细一点
I think this one has got a slightly...
卡尔穿着一身
And Cal's all glammed up
马莎百货公♥司♥卖♥♥的“蓝色港湾”服装
in his Marks & Sparks Blue Harbour gear.
这可是雨果博斯 你别瞎说
Er, Hugo Boss, you cheeky sod!
你再看看自己的打扮
What have you come as?
就像个无家可归的摇滚歌♥手
You look like a homeless Shakin' Stevens.
这是最新的时尚
Eh, it's the latest fashions.
在伦敦没有穿这样衣服的人吗
Do they not have this in that London, eh?
真是好久不见了
It's been a while, hasn't it?
上次见面是肯齐的婚礼
Kenzie's wedding, apparently.
天哪 没错 他也要来吗
Oh, God, yeah, course. Is he coming?
不 他在德国
No, no, he's in Germany.
只有我们三个人
It's just us three,
就像过去的美好时光那样 我们三个好朋友
like in the good old days. The three amigos.
什么 我还以为
What? I thought it was
会是一场盛大的游艇派对 很多人都来
like a big fuck-off party cruise with loads of people.
对不起 我是不是白来一趟了
Sorry, have I got the shit end of the stick here?
没有 一定很棒的
No, no, it's going to be great.
我都计划好了
I've got it all planned.
我们去湖上待到天黑
We're going to get out on the lake when it gets dark.
我们有很多事情可做的
We've got so much to catch up on.
烦死了
Fuckin' hell!
这里有没有人有羊蹄叶
Anyone got a dock leaf?
我觉得刚刚被荨麻刺到了我的私处
I think I've just stung me fanny on a nettle.
抱歉 隐私部位
Sorry, "front bum".
大家好
Hiya!
这位是谁
Who's this?
这是我的新欢 唐娜
It's me new bird, Donna.
-我答应她我们要去坐船的 -我们是要坐船
-I promised her we were going out on a boat.-We are.
该死
Oh, shit...
-你们好 -你好
-Hello, hello.-Hi.
我是唐娜 很高兴见到你们
I'm Donna. Pleased to meet you.
-劳伦斯 -你好 我是卡勒姆
-Laurence.-Hi! Callum.
这里挺好的
Hey, it's well nice here, innit?
我妈妈有一个像这样的托盘
Me mum's got a tray like this.
我以后会告诉她
Wait till I tell her!
游艇上有室内区域吗
Hey, has the yacht got an inside bit?
我的胸部快冻僵了
Cos I'm freezing me tits off already.
达伦 你能帮我一下吗
Er, Darren, could you give me a hand?
当然可以
Oh, yeah, course.
你在搞什么
What are you playing at?
邀请只是针对你的
The invite was for you only.
我想给她留下好印象 明白吗
Well, I was trying to impress her, wasn't I?
我们才交往了几个星期
We've only been shagging for a few weeks.
我希望只有我们4个人
I wanted it to be just the four of us.
就是4个人
It is!
怎么了 拉里
What's the matter, Larry?
我只不过希望你能提前告诉我
I wish you'd told me,
这么一来事情变得非常尴尬
that's all. It makes things very awkward.
对我和别人也很尴尬
It's awkward for me, an' all.
我以为是那种自带伴侣 佩戴腕带的高档派对
I thought it was all plus-ones and wristbands.
她可是推掉闺蜜的单身派对来的呢
She's missing her mate's hen do for this.
它能不能把我们送到开派对的大船上
So, does this take us to the party boat?
能
Yeah.
坐上峦铜船 我们就走
Yeah, just, er, jump on the paedo and we'll be off.
你说什么
You what?
我们要坐一段峦铜船才行
We're just going to have a quick go on the paedo.
你说的是脚踏船吗
You mean "pedalo".
原来它叫这个啊
Is that what it's called?
我以为它叫“峦铜船”
I thought they were called paedos.
觉得挺奇怪的
I thought it was a bit weird!
好吧 我们走吧
Right, well, come on, let's cast off.
女士优先
Ladies first.
我才不坐呢 座位都是湿的
I'm not sitting in that. The seats are all wet.
其实冷水会对你的阴♥部♥可以有效的缓解刺痛
Actually, the cold water will help with your vaginal irritation.
对不起 我的隐私部位名叫达伦
Er, 'scuse me, his name is Darren.
她把你逗笑了
She got you!
我们走吧 小心点
Here we go. Whoopsie-daisy.
好了 准备好了吗 抓紧了
Ok? You ready? Hold on tight.
可恶 裤子可是新的
Bloody hell! These are brand-new!
你还好吗 快点
You all right? Come on.
天哪
Oh... Christ!
我们走吧
Here we go.
我已经很多年没有坐过这个了
I haven't done this for years!
太棒了 是不是
Hey, it's great, innit?
就像伊比沙岛一样宝贝
Going to be like Ibiza, babe! Whoo-whoo!
太酷了 对吧
Whoa, this is cool, isn't it?
景色怡人
It's charming.
三个男人同舟 避而不谈那条狗
Three Men In A Boat, To Say Nothing Of The Dog.
对不起 再说一遍
Er, sorry, say that again.