我可以毁掉你

I May Destroy You S01E04

Part 1 July 16, 2020, 11:37 a.m.

我知道你的名字阿♥拉♥贝拉·埃西杜
So, I have your name, Arabella Essiedu.
还知道七周前有个陌生人
Next to that, Stranger One,
对你进行了毒品性侵
seven weeks ago DFSA,
也就是"毒品导致的性侵犯"的简称
which stands for Drug-Facilitated Sexual Assault.
所以接下来由你跟我分享你的故事
So, anything else I come to know will be what you share with me
我会严格保密
and is confidential.
好
Ok.
-开始了吗 -治疗吗
- Has it started? - The session?
-是的 -开始了
- Mm. - Yeah.
好
Ok.
我可以毁掉你
第一季第四集
? Gotta give thanks way too much peace ?
? When I two step to the beat, that feels sweet ?
刚才很爽
? Way too blessed, that's me ?
? Back then things got messy ?
你在超♥市♥里吗
? Way too stressy ?
? Now good vibes at the ready ?
在
? Tell a man grab a little bevvy' ?
? Shout out Femi my joy they ain't taking any ?
你太性感了来厕所中间的隔间
? These are the days ?
? We prayed for ?
? The sun still shines on me ?
-这会持续多久... -一个小时
- How long does this...? - One hour.
好
Ok.
-这很难 -是的
- It's tough. - Yeah.
你怎么样
How are you doing?
我挺好的
I'm great, great.
只要我周围有人我就没事
I'm great as long as I'm around people.
我一个人的时候...
When I'm alone...
回忆闪现
Flashbacks?
有时候会更严重
It's just sometimes it gets a bit much.
更严重的时候你会怎么办
What do you do when it gets a bit much?
我确保我周围会有人
I ju... I just make sure I'm around someone, anyone.
如果没有的话我会说
Yeah, and if I'm not I say,
有许多饥肠辘辘的孩子有许多饥肠辘辘的孩子
"There are hungry children, there are hungry children,
有许多饥肠辘辘的孩子叙利亚还在战争中
there are hungry children. There's a war in Syria,
叙利亚还在战争中叙利亚还在战争中"
There's a war in Syria, there's a war in Syria."
或者 "不是所有人都有智能手♥机♥
Or "Not everyone has a smartphone,
不是所有人都有智能手♥机♥ 不是所有人都有智能手♥机♥
Not everyone has a smartphone, not everyone has a smartphone."
让我自己看看全局
To remind myself of the bigger picture.
有时候我们极力想看到全局...
Sometimes, when we try our best to see the big picture...
我们会错过许多细节
we lose sight of the little one altogether.
而细节就是你
The little detail here is you.
强♥奸♥创伤综合征有几个普遍的症状
Rape Trauma Syndrome. It's got some common symptoms
经常闪回的记忆
frequent flashbacks,
在会让你回想起侵犯场景的地方或情况下
high irritability in places or situations
会高度易怒
that remind you of the assault,
注意力难以集中情绪麻木
difficulty focusing, emotional numbing,
有时候你自己都不知道
which can sometimes be a hard one to know you have.
你有什么方法能帮我集中注意力吗
Do you have any advice for focus?
因为我的书马上该交初稿了
Cos I have the first draft of a book due.
在这事发生之前我还好但现在
I was doing all right before everything, but now
我脑子有点...
my head's just sort of...
对
Yeah.
他们派了一个人
They have given me
来帮我
a guy to help me.
你有没有申请休息
Have you asked to take a break?
我只有交了初稿才有薪水
I don't get paid until I've delivered my first draft
所以请假对我没好处
so a break isn't going to help me.
他们能替我付的只有这次治疗的钱
The only thing they're paying for is this therapy.
明白了好吧
I see, OK.
我只能提醒你
I can only remind you
尽可能地照顾好自己
to take care of yourself whenever possible.
还有那个
And that one.
和家人在一起吗
With family?
家人吗
Family?
对我偶尔见见他们
Yeah. Yeah, I see... I see 'em a bit.
我猜你还没告诉你妈妈吧
You haven't told your mum, I guess?
但是我有朋友
But I've got friends. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
我的朋友们都知道发生了什么
And my friends they, you know, they all know what happened so...
找到自己信任的人是有帮助的
It's helpful to identify people you trust,
接下来试着做一些令人放松的
and, then, from there, try doing relaxing,
有新意的事
creative things together.
比如
Like?
你可以去散步
You could go for walks,
瑜伽慢跑冥想
yoga, jogging, meditation,
-画画 -画画
- painting. - Painting?
做手工
Handicrafts.
我不知道手工是什么
I don't think I know what handicrafts is.
填色画
Colouring in.
我朋友不会...
My friends aren't really going to be...
本他喜欢这些玩意
Ben, actually. This is his kind of shit.
本会喜欢...
Ben will be into...
我给他发信息
I'll just text him.
他在输入
He's typing.
他今晚不行
He's not in tonight.
该死乐队排练
Fuck. Band practice.
我会搞定的
I'll sort it.
我没事我会没事的好了
I'm OK, I'll be fine. I will... Yeah, OK.
我知道我要做什么我会没事
Yep, I know what I'm going to do. I'll be fine.
开始
Go, go, go, go.
你们是浴火重生的凤♥凰♥ 你们是什么
You are the phoenix rising from the flames. What are you?
-凤♥凰♥ -你们是什么
- Phoenix! - What are you?
-凤♥凰♥ -那就展翅飞翔
- The phoenix! - Now rise.
飞过敌人的尸体
Take flight over the bodies of your dead enemies.
你们是什么
What are you?
你们要成为凤♥凰♥还是沦为鸽子
Are you going to be the phoenix or the pigeon class?
-凤♥凰♥ -很好
- The phoenix! - Good!
不行不行两倍速度两倍速度
No, no, no, no, no, double time. Double time!
你们说什么你们说什么
What you saying? Huh? Huh? What you saying?
你们大家不必伪装
Right, yous lot, you don't need to pretend to be someone you're not.
你们每天上班的时候
You do that every day at work,
在地铁上和家人在一起时都要伪装自己
on the train, at home with your family.
但你在我这里我允许你们
When you're here with me, I give you permission
做自己
to do you.
高抬腿跳四
Knee pumps. Four,
三二
and three, two,
一很棒
one, well done!
很棒我的凤♥凰♥们
Well done, my phoenixes.
好休息两分钟喝点水
All right, two minutes water break.
调整呼吸很好
Right, get your air inside you. Good.
-你来了 -你好
- Yo. - Hey.
我奶奶很喜欢你今早的课
My grandma really liked your class this morning,
-水中有氧操 -我很开心
- the, um, aqua aerobics. - Oh, I'm glad.
我看到你在窗户外面
Yeah, I saw you in, um... I saw you in the window.
对
Cool, um...
这是我最后一节课了
You know, it's actually my last class so
如果你想跟我喝杯咖啡什么的
if you want to grab a coffee or something,
我30分钟就好
I'll be done in 30.
好了各位一分钟后继续
OK, everyone, back in one minute.
我其实挺同情他的
You know what, I actually feel a bit sorry for him.
是吗
Yeah?
是的他从加纳过来看我
Yeah, he's visiting from Ghana.
大部分时间他甚至不能直视我
Most days, he can't even look me in the eye.
我就会叫他 "你好老爸"
I'm like, I'm like "Hey, Dad!"
他皱着眉头骂骂咧咧的
He's scrunching his face, cursing the house.
无所谓了
It's whatever.
他明天就走了
One more day and he gone!
我从没和你这类人聊过天...
I've never really spoken to a brother who was, um...
哪类同性恋吗
What, gay?
拜托你能说我们在英国
Come on, you can say it, we're in Britain...
没人会把我赶出去
no-one's going to throw me off a building,
拿着棍子追我
chase me with a stick.
你可以说