难得幸福（2015）

Happyish S01E09

Part 1 April 17, 2021, 9:31 a.m.

难得幸福前情提要
Previously on "Happyish"...
你还记得我们的初次见面吗
Do you remember when we first met?
我进到这然后说
I came in here and I said,
你好拉里纳什我喜欢你的工作
"Hey, Larry Nash, love your work.
我是这的新人你猜你怎么说
I just started here." And you know what you said?
-说得什么 -我深表同情
- What? - I'm sorry to hear that.
嘿你们不能炒了拉里
Come on, you can't fire Larry.
他刚有个孩子
He's just had a baby.
他们是感情牌
They're stock photos.
他把这个当手牌所以我们不忍♥心炒了他
He puts them up so we don't fire him.
这太天才了
That's genius.
-他们移了你的办公室 -为什么
- They moved your office. - Why?
这是全新的概念室
This is the new ideation room.
一个全新的概念室 -一个概念室
An ideation room? - An ideation room.
冥想处
Contemplation corner.
那么你知道的说句实在话
Well, you know, to be fair,
这确实有助于我思考
it helps with the "Au-think-ification."
啊
Ah.
这可能是我们国外的敌人
These may be our enemies abroad.
这些是我们国内的敌人
These are our enemies at home.
-家长们 -操蛋的侦查员
- Parents. - Fuckin' boomers.
汤姆你对任何一次军事行动都有不好的预感
Thom, you feel bad about every Army assignment.
这就是我们爱你的原因
That's why we love you.
或许我应该入伍
Maybe I should enlist.
我会带上尤利乌斯把你的儿子带上战场
I'll bring Julius. Take your son to war day.
我希望我们不至于如此绝望
I'm hoping we don't get that desperate.
如果感到幸福你就拍拍手
If you're happy and you
-对不起
- - Sorry.
怎么了
What's up?
额
Um...
汤姆额
Thom, uh...
拉里昨天晚上自杀了
Larry committed suicide last night.
什么
What?
我今天早上才知道的
I just... I found out this morning.
丹妮给我发了篇文章
Dani sent me an article.
他在家里一直很烦躁而且
He'd been having trouble at home, and...
额他
uh, he...
你在说什么啊
What are you talking about?
他最近被他工作了
He was recently terminated
很长时间的地方解雇了
at his longtime place of employment.
他和他妻子吵了一架
He had a fight with his wife.
他们最近矛盾多多
They'd been having troubles.
然后他说他要自杀了
And he said he was gonna kill himself.
他走进地窖那个丙烷罐
He went down in the cellar... the... propane tanks.
他的妻子和孩子
His wife and kids
刚好在那时候出去了
got out just... just in time.
是啊
Yeah.
而且他们不知道他打算
And they don't know if he was trying to...
你知道的是不是想把他们两个也杀了
you know, if he was trying to kill them too.
关于自杀的这件事我想就是这样
The thing about suicide, I think, is this.
我们理解
We get it.
真的表示理解
We totally get it.
终结一切扔到垃圾桶里去
Ending it, throwing in the towel.
操♥他♥妈♥的全都操♥他♥妈♥的
Fuck it. Fuck all of it.
我们不哀悼我们不原谅
We don't condone it. We don't forgive it.
但我们表示完全的理解
But we totally, totally get it.
你好这是拉里请给我留言
Hey, this is Larry. Leave me a message,
我会尽快回复你的多谢
and I'll return it as soon as possible. Thanks.
你好拉里这里是汤姆
Hey, Larry. It's Thom.
额我刚到办公室
Uh, I just was in the office,
我听说你昨晚自杀了
and I... I heard you killed yourself last night.
所以我觉得我有必要
So I just thought I'd call
以办公室的立场打几个电♥话♥
on behalf of the office and, uh,
给你的朋友和你的家人
your friends and your family
你的老婆和你的孩子
and your wife and your kids,
并且我觉得也要打给你然后告诉你
and I thought I'd just call you and tell you
我真觉得你是个大怂逼
what a piece-of-shit pussy I think you are.
你真是个超级无敌操蛋的怂逼拉里
You're a huge, huge fucking piece-of-shit pussy, Larry.
所以操♥你♥妈♥的
So fuck you.
操♥你♥妈♥的你这个怂逼
Fuck you, you fucking pussy fuck!
这对我们大家来说都是一个难熬的早上
This has been a tough morning for all of us.
所以让我们一起努力
So let's... let's just try and get through this
尽快度过难关好吗
as quickly as possible, okay?
是的让我们打起精神来
Yes, let's... let's dive right in.
这其实非常简单
Well, it's very simple.
军队的问题是这样的
The problem for the Army is this.
国家发展起了很大的作用
The country is doing well.
经济下滑入伍人数增加
The economy goes down, enlistment goes up.
经济上升
The economy goes up,
有更好的选择入伍人数下降
better options, enlistment tanks.
是啊我们的冷冻披萨账单
Yeah, we're having the same problem
也存在同样的问题
on the frozen pizza accounts.
当经济好的时候没人吃这个玩意
Nobody eats that shit when things are good.
是啊操蛋的经济复苏
Yeah, fuckin' recovery.
整个事情就是弱化军队的戏码
Whole thing is just a plot to weaken the military.
我猜奥巴马私底下是个穆♥斯♥林♥
Guess Obama really is a secret Muslim.
- 是吧汤姆 - 什么
- Right, Thom? - What?
我说的是米歇尔现在肯定有
I mean, Michelle, surely there must be
经济衰退类似的东西
a recession around the corner or so.
我们是多么幸运
We should be so lucky.
不幸的是所有的经济指数
Unfortunately, all economic indicators
都指向可持续发展
point to continued growth.
我的建议是恐慌
My suggestion... fear.
整个经济会越来越好
The economy might be getting better,
但是这个世界还是像以前那样危险
but the world is as dangerous as it ever was.
不要让那些数字迷惑你
Don't let the numbers fool you.
我们需要提醒人们这个问题
We need to remind people of this.
我们要说这并没有结束
We need to say it's not over.
在长♥期♥内也不会
Not by a long shot.
像个食虫人 -正是如此
The boogeyman. - Exactly.
麦卡锡主义
McCarthyism.
是啊这对麦卡锡适用
Yeah, it worked for McCarthy.
我们有红色恐慌
We had red scare.
我们遭遇了黄♥祸♥
We had yellow peril.
欢迎尝试穆♥斯♥林♥恐慌
Welcome to the new "Turban dread."
- 我喜欢这个 - 黛比：是啊
- I like that. - Debbie: Yeah.
制♥造♥恐慌在任何经济体内都适用
Fear is effective in any economy.
可是难道一定要上色吗
But doesn't it need a color?
你知道的红色恐慌黄♥祸♥
You know, red scare, yellow menace.
那和沙子有关的事呢
What about something with sand?
比如额沙漠
Like, uh... like the desert.
沙子关于沙子的牌子吗
Sand... band. Sand brand?
那关于穆哈穆德的事呢
What about something with Muhammad?
汤姆
Thom?
比如甚至是呆瓜穆德
Like, uh, "Even mo' Hammad"?
他们想要颜色米卡儿
They want a color, Mikal.
哦伊♥斯♥兰♥教恐吓了他们
Ooh. Harem scare 'em.
该怎么样上色
How is that a color?
用他们头巾的颜色怎么样白色
What about the color of their turbans? White?
哦是的白色惊骇怎么样
Oh, yeah. What about "White fright"?
- 哎呦不错哦 - 恩我喜欢白色惊骇
- That's good. - Yeah, I like "White fright."
白色惊骇听起来会不会太过了
It sounds too much like "White flight."
我感觉穆♥斯♥林♥恐慌更加实际
I think "Turban dread" Is more specific.
硬便便怎么样
What about "Tough Shiite"?
阳光韵律如何
"Sunni Tunes"?
惊奇的发明
Amazing inventions.
完美的产品
Incredible products.
欢迎来到比出剪刀手的全新一季
Welcome to another episode of...
你们的主持人吉米扎莱什
"I'll Take Two" With your host Jimmy Zales.
比出剪刀手比出剪刀手
I'll take two! I'll take two!