难得幸福（2015）

你在使国王分心"
You're distracting the King."
打搅一下
Excuse me.
我们能在来一轮苹果马提尼
Could we get another round of appletinis
和一些芝士棒吗
and some more mozzarella sticks?
- 好的 - 天呐
- Sure. - Oh, my God.
我告诉过你 那是个好主意
I told you. This was a good idea.
哦 不 妈妈 那主意绝了
Oh. No, mama, this was a great idea.
我15年后的最后一天
My last day after 15 years.
你知道我最自豪的是什么吗
You know what I'm proudest of?
魔术胸罩 绝佳的支撑
Wonderbra. Supporting greatness.
嘿 我遗传了这项运动
Hey, I inherited that campaign.
混♥蛋♥ 它现在是你的了
It's yours now, asshole.
是的 用不着提醒我
Yeah, don't remind me.
你想最后在你离开之前再选一对吗
Do you wanna pick one last pair before you leave?
"我们将会使这个牌子
"We are going to take this brand
从乳♥房♥♥变成女英雄"
from hooters to heroines."
那其实是玛雅说的
Maya actually said that.
然后她给我们展示了幻灯片
And then she took us through her slideshow
展示了拥有丰满胸部的成功女性
of great women with great racks.
- 我知道 - 埃莉诺 罗斯福
- I know. - Eleanor Roosevelt.
果尔达 梅厄 芭芭拉 布♥什♥
Golda Meir. Barbara Bush.
嘿 伙计 芭芭拉的都变形了
Hey, Babs had a rack on her, man.
好吧 老布♥什♥太喜欢蹂躏乳♥房♥♥了
Well, Bush '41 was a tit man.
是的 每届总统都喜欢蹂躏乳♥房♥♥
Yeah, well, all presidents are tit men.
额 不算奥巴马 奥巴马喜欢蹂躏肛♥门♥
Mm. Not Obama. Obama's an ass man.
是的 是的 这可能是椭圆办公室的笑话
Yeah. Yeah, there's probably a joke about the Oval Office,
但我觉得一点儿都不好笑
but I can't be bothered.
还记得我们第一次见面的时候吗
Do you remember when we first met?
应该是15年前的现在吧
It's gotta be 15 years ago now.
我进来然后说 嘿
I came in here and I said, "Hey...
拉里 纳什 热爱你的工作 我就是从这里开始的
Larry Nash, love your work. I just started here."
- 你知道你说了什么吗 - 什么
- You know what you said? - What?
"我很抱歉听你这么说"
"I'm sorry to hear that."
是啊
Yeah.
你最骄傲的是什么
So what are you most proud of?
15年一直在这家破公♥司♥
That in 15 years in this fucking business
这家我一直都憎恨着的公♥司♥
I never once stopped hating it.
真好
Good for you.
我认为最困扰我的
I think that's what bothers me the most
你知道吗 就是那些年轻人
about these younger guys, you know?
认为他们自己很潮
That they think it's cool.
而且他们还很喜欢这种感觉
You know? They like it.
他们也不介意给撒旦工作
They don't mind working for Satan.
你知道的 工资很高
You know, the pay is fantastic.
但你也不能忘记那是撒旦啊
But you can't forget it's Satan.
你叫了达尼吗
Did you call Dani?
好吧 说实话 我为自己曾经也是那个样子感到很羞愧
You know, I'm ashamed I was ever good at it, to be honest.
我认为是这里的一切才是让我很高兴回来的原因
You know, I think it was the stuff that made me happy back then.
这个品牌 这些我年轻时候的东西
You know, the brands and the things when I was younger.
耐克 李维斯 宝马
The Nikes and the Levis and the BMWs.
成为其中的一员真的很开心
It was fun to be a part of.
能参与其中也很高兴
It was fun to get involved with.
因为产品本身
Because the products themselves
就会使我感到开心 你知道吗
actually made me happy, you know?
然后在35岁的时候发生一些事情
And then somewhere around 35 or something, something happens.
一些使你不再开心的事情
It stopped making you happy.
我记得几个月前我看着我的房♥子
I remember looking around my house a few months back,
里面有价值5000美元的沙发
and it's just filled with $5,000 couches
还有没有灵魂 毫无生机的艺术作品 我就想
and dead, soulless art, and I just thought,
"这些该死的都是什么东西"
"What the fuck is all this shit?"
我邻居特德经过
My neighbor Ted was over,
我就说 "特德 这些该死的都是什么"
and I said, "Ted, what is all this shit?"
他怎么说
What did he say?
他给了我两千美元买♥♥了那张沙发
He offered me two grand for the couch.
你叫了达尼吗
Did you call Dani?
- 是的 - 然后
- Yeah. - And?
她说脸书员工的平均年龄是26岁
She said the average employee age at Facebook is 26
谷歌♥是31 苹果是33
and at Google it's 31 and at Apple it's 33.
我不知道更糟的情况是什么 你离开或者我留下
I don't know what's worse, your leaving or my staying.
好性感啊
This is sexy.
你认为呢
What do you think?
你女儿穿上应该不错
It would look good on your daughter.
贝拉 看这个
Bella, look at this.
这个看起来不错 你穿上很漂亮
This would look great... you'd look awesome in this.
真的很性感
This is really hot.
贝拉 那不是性感
That's not hot, Bella.
那很可笑
That's ridiculous.
- 和巴里有关吗 - 什么
- Is this about Barry? - What?
你没必要为了吸引他的注意力
You do not need to dress like a teenager
穿的跟个青少年一样
to keep him interested in you.
喔哦 操♥你♥妈♥
Wow. Fuck you.
他拥有你就应该很开心了
He should be happy to have you at all.
我就是这个意思啊
That's all I'm saying.
看看是谁要给我上一堂关于开心的课
Oh. Look who's gonna lecture me about happy.
看看你 李
Look at you, Lee.
你有完美的婚姻
You have a good marriage.
你有可爱的孩子
You have a beautiful child.
你有家 你有工作室
You have a home. You have a studio.
但你还在生气
And you are still pissed off.
你还不满足
You are still dissatisfied.
李 为什么 恩
Why is that, Lee? Huh?
你还想要什么
What's it gonna take?
你需要多完美
How perfect does your shit need to be
才能使你自己感到一点儿快乐
before you let yourself even feel an ounce of joy?
别跟我谈幸福 好吗
Don't talk to me about happy, okay?
别跟我谈任何事情
Don't talk to me about anything.
听着 阿托米克 我不认为我们应该再继续看下去了
Listen, uh, Atomic, I'm not sure I can take much more of this.
是的 我听到了
Yeah, I hear ya.
如果你是要挑一个模特 我觉得这个就挺好的
Look, if you wanna choose the model, that's fine by me.
我都不知道他们为什么要用模特
I don't even know why they use a model anyway.
这样有一种此地无银三百两的感觉
It's not like anybody doesn't know what they do.
或者是奶♥子♥长什么样
Or what tits look like.
正解
Exactly.
好吧
All right.
你看 我在想
You know, I was thinking...
或许他们不应该
maybe they shouldn't even
雇佣任何一个魔术胸罩的模特
have a Wonderbra model anymore, you know?
我是说 我不 你是
I mean, I don't... you're
一个很有创意的导演 你了解的比我多
the creative director. You know better than me.
但是 她们需要做的
But, like, maybe all they need to do
是让自己的乳♥房♥♥大一些
is own big.
好吧 这是我这项工作的第一天
Well, this is my first day on the account,
你知道吗 咱俩的想法一样
so, you know, your guess is as good as mine.
我就想 所有一切
I just think, like, all this
"绝佳的支撑" 该死 伙计 那很弱
"Supporting greatness" Shit, it's weak, man.
感觉好像他们自己很尴尬
It's like they're embarrassed to be who they are.
所有人都喜欢大奶♥子♥
People like big tits. All people.
如果有人不喜欢 让他们去死吧
Except for the people that don't, and fuck them.
无论如何 他们是不会买♥♥魔术胸罩的
They're not buying Wonderbras anyway.
让我们自己变大就好
So let's just own big.
美国人喜欢大
Americans like big.
大汉堡 大卡车 大奶♥子♥
Big burgers, big trucks, big tits.
你都不需要去看那些妞 知道吗
You don't even need to see some chick, you know?
你不需要看这些产品
You don't even need to see the product.
你就只要展现
You just open up on, uh... on...
我不知道 你展现中国的长城
I don't know, you open up on the Great Wall of China, right?
让人们知道它有多大
And you see how huge it is, right?
它太巨大了 好多好多英里这么长
You know, it's gigantic. Miles long, all that shit.
然后 标题就出现了
And then the title comes up.
"没有人去过世界的另一边
"Nobody travels halfway around the world