难得幸福（2015）

我最近超级生气
I've been kinda pissed off lately.
其实这不是我的风格
And it's not just me.
每个我认识的人最近都超级生气
Everyone I know has been pissed off lately...
贝拉 莫妮卡 爱里森
Bella, Monica, Allison.
没人知道为什么生气
None of us knows why.
不是勃然大怒 也不是怒不可遏
It's not rage or fury.
不是莫名的不安 也不是倦怠
It's not malaise or ennui.
我指的是 见鬼 我倒希望是由具体的什么引起的
I mean, hell, I wish it was something specific,
具体到我可以用手指指着它说
something I could just point my finger at and say,
医生 看看 就是这里疼
"Doctor, look. Here's where it hurts.
就是这里在流血
Here is where I'm bleeding."
但不是
But it isn't.
我的意思是 我唯一能想出的描述是
I mean, the only way that I can describe it is this.
我觉得我像一个希伯来人
I feel like an Israelite.
你知道的 我记得我还是小孩的时候
You know, I remember as a kid
听过沙漠中的希伯来人的故事
that story of the Israelites in the desert
他们寻找了四十年
and how they wandered around for 40 years,
他们被告知 这里是完美的居所 希望的土地
being told about this awesome place, this promised land.
你知道最后他们到达那里发现了什么
And you know what they found when they got there?
一片操蛋的沙漠
A fucking desert.
噢 贝拉 这是个坏点子
Oh, Bella, this was a bad idea.
噢 不要这样 值得一试
Oh, come on. It's worth a shot.
这里有超过四百间商店
There's over 400 stores in here.
总有可以提神的东西
Something in here has to lift our spirits.
－购物疗法 －啊 购物疗法
- Retail therapy. - Ugh. Retail therapy.
你知道对谁来说购物疗法管用
You know who retail therapy helps?
－店员 －我在试着帮忙 李
- Retailers. - I'm trying to help, Lee.
你想要花一百块
You wanna spend a hundred bucks
让心理医生乱婊你妈妈
bitching about your mother to some shrink,
还是想花在毛边牛仔短裤上
or do you wanna spend a hundred bucks on some foxy cutoffs?
不 不 不 不
No, no, no, no.
贝拉 啊
Bella. Ugh.
操
Fuck.
如果你很快乐你就
If you're happy and you
对 嗯 很性感
Yes, yeah, that... that's hot.
非常好 真的非常好
Very nice. Very nice indeed.
好吧 换一个角度
All right. Can you go the other way?
非常好
Very nice.
奥托米 哥德法
Atomic Goldfarb.
你觉得 这是一个传统的犹太名字吗
Is that a traditional Jewish name, you think?
奥托米
Atomic?
他们说他很棒
They say he's good.
拜托 他就是想摆脱我
Please, he's been brought in to push me out.
或许是吧
Probably, yes.
我不知道为什么我要做这个神奇胸罩的事情 ［一款在1990年代成为世界知名品牌的上托式胸罩内衣］
I don't know why I'm doing the Wonderbra thing, anyway.
我正在流失我自己的客户
I'm buried in my own accounts.
操♥你♥妈♥ 托姆 你应该感谢我
Fuck you, Thom. You should be thanking me.
这是拉里唯一一个
This is the only account of Larry's
人人都求我的客户
that everyone's been begging me for.
就是这样 就是这样
That's it. That's it.
看看这
Look at that.
我一定要告诉你 这对我来说什么意义都没有
I gotta tell ya, this does nothing for me anymore.
和丹尼做♥爱♥就是完全另外一♥码♥事了
Having sex with Dani is just like a whole different thing.
她的身体就像是
Her body is like...
她人生的地图
it's like a map of her life.
噢 老天爷
Oh, God.
我指的是 一开始我就像是
I mean, at first I'm like,
嘿 这是我做过的最老的女人
"Hey, this is the oldest woman I've ever had sex with,"
但现在 我觉得她或许是唯一
but now I think she may be the only real woman
我做过的唯一一个真实的女人
I've ever had sex with.
每个四十岁以下女人的身体
Every female body under 40
看上去像是从同一本商品目录里面买♥♥的
looks like they bought it from the same catalog,
她们也的确这样
which they did.
三十岁以下的女人像是宜家家具
And women under 30 are like Ikea furniture.
你知道的 看上去好 可是人手一件
You know, it looks good, but everyone's got it.
但是搬到家里之后 很容易就坏掉了
By the time you get it home, it's probably gonna be damaged.
但是我要告诉你 我用手托着丹尼的胸的时候
But I'm telling you, when I cup Dani's breast in my hand,
那儿 那儿有生命在跳动 你知道吗
there's... there's life in there, you know?
你无法购买♥♥它
You can't buy that.
无法做手术得到它
There's no surgery you get for that.
这是生活 这是旅程
It's life. It's a journey.
每个凹痕 每个瑕疵 每个不完美
And every dent, every scar, every imperfection
只会让女人更美丽
just makes a woman all the more beautiful.
地心引力铸就了女性的身躯
Gravity does wonderful things to the female body.
没错
Yep.
你吸过松弛的奶♥子♥吗
Have you ever sucked a saggy tit?
哇
Whoa.
她可以把口香糖拿走吗
Can she take that gum out?
我们到了
We have arrived!
等等
Wait.
就这样吗
This is it?
这就是希望的土地吗
This is the promised land?
你在开玩笑吗 这就是个屎坑
Are you kidding me? It's a shithole.
没错 但是是我们的屎坑
Yes, but it's our shithole.
屎坑
A shithole?
这他妈连屎坑都算不上
It's not even a fucking shithole.
什么都不是 屎坑好歹还是个东西
It's nothing. A shithole would be something.
没有什么东西入得了您的法眼
Nothing is ever good enough for you people.
－难怪上帝讨厌你 －胡说
- No wonder God hates you. -This is bullshit.
我知道我们就不该离开埃及
I knew we shouldn't have left Egypt.
至少在埃及我们还可以想着更好的地方
At least back in Egypt we could have imagined someplace better.
噢 操♥他♥妈♥ 回去吧
Oh, fuck it. Let's just go back.
噢 我们不可以试着享受一下这吗
Oh, can't we please just try to enjoy this?
他说我们会在这儿找到什么东西
He said that we would find something here.
他说这里会有什么
He said there would be something here.
一个理由 一个目的 一个意义
A reason, a purpose, a meaning.
他对我们撒谎了 贝儿
He lied to us, Bells.
享受什么
Enjoy what?
蝎子 空虚 漫天黄沙
The scorpions, the emptiness, the sand?
没错 黄沙
Yes! Sand.
沙子很有意思不是吗
Sand is fun, okay?
你有什么反对理由吗
What do you got against sand?
沙堡 沙箱
Sand castles. Sand boxes.
－沙蟹 －沙暴
- Sand crabs. - Sand storms.
噢 难道我们不可以就玩玩沙子吗 同志们
Oh, can't we just play in the sand, guys?
我们不可以就玩玩沙子吗
Can't we just play in the sand?
因为我厌烦了徘徊 行走 等待
Cause I'm so sick of wandering and walking and waiting.
如果玩玩沙子 会振奋人心 好吗
And if we play in the sand, it'll cheer us up, okay?
就玩玩沙子吧
Let's just play in the sand.
看着我 我就在玩沙子
Look at me. I'm just playing in the sand!
我的眼睛
My eyes!
噢 天哪 我的眼睛
Oh, my God. My eyes.
贝拉 我想我要犯病了
Bella, I think I'm gonna have a seizure.
我们可不可以离开这地方
Can we please get out of here?
看看这张照片
Look at the picture on this.
超棒
It's amazing.
海伦凯勒没有错
Helen Keller had the right idea.
又聋又瞎 就是正途
Blind and deaf. That's the way to go.
六十四英寸 两千像素
6♥4♥-inch screen. 2,000 pixels.
你听说莱尼 布鲁斯假吐的事情了吗
Did you ever hear that Lenny Bruce thing about fake vomit?
没 也不想知道
No, and we don't want to.
嗯 他说 你知道为什么他们假吐吗
Mm. He said, "You know why they make fake vomit?
因为假货都卖♥♥得无敌好
'Cause the fake shit sold so well."
三千块 哈 你卖♥♥了很多了吗
$3,000, huh? You sell a lot of these?
噢 卖♥♥得超好的
Oh, can't keep them in the store.
我觉得我有其他你感兴趣的货
I think I have one more in stock if you're interested.
－你有大♥麻♥吗 －大♥麻♥
- Do you have any crack? - Crack?
没错 我在找
Yeah. I'm looking for
不那么成瘾的东西
something that's maybe a little less addictive,
对脑袋没那么有害的东西
maybe something a little less bad for my brain?