第二十二条军规

德国人投降 你以为接下来会怎样
So the Germans fold, and then what do you think happens?
我回家
Then I go home.
你知道我们在太平洋上打仗吧
You do realize we're fighting a war in the Pacific right now?
欧战一结束
And as soon as Europe is done,
如果你尚未正式退伍
if you haven't already been formally discharged,
你会被直接派往那里
they're gonna ship you straight out there,
你可不想去那里
and you do not want to go there.
那里有疟疾 嗯
They got malaria there. Yeah.
还有真菌 两种真菌
They got fungus. They got two kinds of fungus.
有种能钻进你大脑 吃掉它的真菌
They got a fungus that gets in your brain and eats it.
还有寄生虫 水蛭
They got parasites. They got leeches.
如果我是你 就去飞你的九次任务
I'd fly your nine missions, if I was you.
长官
Hello, sir?
德·科瓦里少校 长官
Major de Coverley, sir?
你好 长官
Hello, sir.
抱歉打扰 长官
Sorry to interrupt, sir.
但我想您会想看看这个
But I think you're gonna want to see this.
什么 这是哪来的
What? Where'd you get these?
苏格兰高地 长官
From the highlands of Scotland, sir.
-是吗 -是的 长官
- Is that so? - Yes, sir.
这是高地羊排
These are highland lamb chops.
这些羔羊 他们整天在英国
These lambs--oh, they're fed on the richest,
吃最丰茂葱绿的苜蓿
greenest clover in all of Great Britain all day long.
我有个朋友就在唐布里斯托的英国皇家空军基地
I have a friend at the RAF base in Donibristle
他在一架货机上清出了块地方
who manages to clear a little space for an icebox
放了个小冰箱
on one of the courier planes.
我可以每周叫人给您送来 长官
I could have these for you every week, sir.
唐布里斯托
Donibristle.
我们可以管这叫周日羊排
Sunday lamb chops, we could call them.
跟我走
Walk with me.
这玩意不是那么容易找
They're not the easiest things to come by.
如果我们苏格兰的朋友能稳定地为我们
If our friend in Scotland is sending us a steady supply
-提供羊排 -好
- of lamb chops-- - Okay.
-再给我一个 -好的 长官
- Give me another one of these. - Of course, sir.
如果我们苏格兰的朋友能稳定地为我们
If our friend in Scotland is sending us a steady supply
提供羊排
of lamb chops,
那我应该回报他点东西
I really should be giving him something in return.
别误会 他是个好人
Now, don't get me wrong. He's a lovely man.
但羊排...
But the lamb chop situation--
我们都知道 长官 这是个商品世界
As we all know, sir, ours is a mercantile world.
这是个付出索取的世界
It's a world of give and take.
比如说 我们苏格兰的那位朋友
Our friend in Scotland, for instance,
偏爱西西里橄榄 这我能拿到
has a fondness for Sicilian olives, which I can get.
如果我是司务长
Now, if I was Mess Officer,
我就能控制货机上的飞行货单
I'd have control of the flight manifests of the cargo planes--
出去的 进来的
the outgoings, the incomings,
如此等等
and so on and so forth.
我们的苏格兰朋友会拿到橄榄
Our friend in Scotland would be happy
在北方迷雾里感到开心
in the northern mists with his olives.
而您则能开心地得到羊排
You'd be happy with your lamb chops.
我可以全心投入地办妥这些事
I could devote my full attention to such matters,
而且不仅仅是唐布里斯托
and it's not just Donibristle we're talking about.
您喜欢卷心饼吗 长官
Do you like strudel, sir?
谁不喜欢卷心饼 小子
Everybody likes strudel, son.
没错 长官
That's exactly right, sir.
您上次吃卷心饼是什么时候了 长官
And when was the last time you had strudel, sir?
-最近没吃过 -我也是
- Not recently. - Me neither.
-我好想念 -我也是
- I miss it. - I miss it, too.
-我也是 -我也是
- As do I. - Me too.
我们不必空怀念的
Well, it needn't be this way.
我们不必空怀念卷心饼 长官
We shouldn't have to miss strudel, sir.
如果我是司务长 我就能解决
If I was Mess Officer, I could fix it.
你叫什么 小子
What's your name, son?
我是迈洛·迈德邦德 长官 我27了
I'm Milo Minderbinder, sir. I'm 27 years old.
今天一帆风顺 各位
Clear sailing today, fellas.
就像在国内一样
Like a day in the country.
前方天空晴朗
Clear skies up ahead.
天气晴好 任务轻松 各位
Beautiful day for a milk run, boys.
蓝天 白云
Blue skies. Cloud nine.
保持稳定248
Holding steady at two-four-eight.
Two-four-eight, 70,200.
得飞到上面 报告我们方位
Got to be on top of it. Where we at?
靠近目标了 还有30秒
Closing in on target. 30 seconds to run.
收到 30秒
Copy that. 30 seconds.
约约 你准备好了吗
Yo-Yo, you ready?
约约 快投弹 然后我们赶紧走
Yo-Yo, drop them, and let's get the fuck out of here.
保持稳定
Holding steady.
该死
Oh, shit!
稳住 我们行的 稳住
Oh, hold on! We got it! Hold on!
小心 你能不能快点
Look out! Will you hurry the fuck up?
天呐
Jesus Christ.
该死 这下可不轻松了 各位
Shit. Not a milk run anymore, fellas.
又来了 稳住
Here we go again. Hold steady.
哈维 我们在哪
Harvey, where we at?
麦克沃特 前往066
Hey, McWatt, bring her to 066.
收到
Roger that.
稳住 稳住
Steady! Steady!
好了 各位 我们靠近了
All right, boys, we're approaching.
约塞连 报告方向
Yossarian, what's your heading?
约塞连 你得到我上面
Hey, Yossarian, you got to get above me.
约塞连 你听到了吗
Hey, Yossarian, you hear me?
约约 下面什么情况
Yo-Yo, what the fuck is going on down there?
约塞连
Yossarian.
我去
Holy shit!
那是怎么回事
What the fuck was that?
我去
Holy fuck!
邓巴怎么了
What happened to Dunbar?
他背伞包了吗
Was he wearing his chute?
我们靠近了
We're getting close!
稳住 76
Hold steady. Seven-six.
我来了
Here I go!
好吧
Okay.
你在吗 约约
You there, Yo-Yo?
稳住 稳住了
Steady! Hold steady!
投弹吧 约约
Drop them, Yo-Yo.
该死 内特利 我们在等待
Go, goddamn it! Nately, we're holding!
闭嘴吧
Shut up!
约塞连 我们靠近了 收到吗
Yossarian, we're approaching. You got that?
收到
I got it, I got it!
10秒
Ten seconds.
稳住
Steady.
该死
Oh, shit!
准备
And...
投吧
Drop them!
好了 投弹
Okay, bombs away!
好了 麦克沃特 带我们离开
Okay, uh, McWatt, get us out of here!
快带我们离开
Get us the goddamn fuck out of here!
该死
Oh, shit!
该死
Oh, fuck!
他的脸
His face...
就在那里
it was right there.
就是那种时刻
And it was one of those moments when...
知道吗
you know...
肯定连半秒的时间都不到
It couldn't have been more than half a second--less than that.
但他...
But he was...
我可以看到一切
I can see everything.
他鼻孔里的每根鼻毛 他的歪牙
Every hair in his nostril, that crooked tooth.
他的眼睛
And his eyes...
他眼前根本没有闪过他的一生
there was no life flashing before them or any of that.
只有恐惧
It's just terror.
仅此而已