流金岁月（2015）

Another Period S01E06

Part 1 March 30, 2021, 3:21 p.m.

今天是我的生日
Today is my birthday.
我简直爱死十一月十一日了
I love September 11th.
谢谢你
Thank you.
哦椅子你一定激动不能自已
Oh, Chair, this must be so exciting for you.
这是你过的第一个莉莉安的生日
It's your first Lillian's birthday.
为什么没把这些钻石放进陶饰彩罐里
Why aren't these diamonds inside the piñata?
你这是在玩忽职守
You're asleep at the switch of danger.
手脚麻利点在
Now hurry, before--
开始啦
Here we go.
我说过我想要纯金的小马
I said I wanted a gold pony,
但你送我的马是镀金的
and the one you gave me is only painted gold.
是的亲爱的我们试着把小马放入融化的金子中
Yes, dear, we tried to dip the pony in molten gold,
但它奋死反抗
but it put up such a terrible fight.
我简直不敢相信这就是我家人
I cannot believe this is how I'm being treated
在我生日当天对我施加的
by my own family on my...
残暴虐待
birthday!
呃
Ugh!
你们毁了我的一生
You're ruining my life!
自从莉莉安开始每月来大姨妈后
Ever since Lillian first began her womanly bleeding,
她的生日就是彻头彻尾的灾难
her birthday has been a menagerie of horrors.
我说我要纯金的小马
I said a gold pony!
我亲爱的小香肠
Hello, Wiener.
爸爸回来了
Daddy's home.
我一看到那个
When I saw that pile
人♥渣♥查尔斯·庞兹
of human excrement Charles Ponzi,
我就退回到我神圣纯粹的卧室中了
I retired to the sanctity of my bedroom.
她怎么敢带另一个男人进这栋房♥子呢
How dare she bring another man into this house?
我可不想被扣上大绿帽
I refuse to be scandalized.
塔布在我发表激动人心的赔罪演说的同时把这些礼物分发给大家
Tabu, dispense the gifts while I give a rousing amends speech.
这个小家伙是塔布
This little fellow's Tabu.
是我从科里奇赢回来的战利品
Won him in a game of Kariki.
请恕我自卖♥♥自夸他可是个超级可爱的棕皮肤小鬼
One of the cuter brownies,if I do say so myself.
我喜欢这个
I love this.
我打算给它起名为弗雷德里克
I'm going to name it Frederick.
我姐姐12岁时庞兹丢下她逃婚了
Ponzi left my sister at the altar when she was 12.
他就是个自私的混♥蛋♥
He's a selfish jerk,
他压根儿就配不上莉莉安
and that's the total opposite of Lillian.
我亲爱的莉莉安
My darling Lillian.
我不想为把你一个人丢在圣坛前找借口
There was no excuse for me leaving you at the altar,
同样不想为在我的更衣室里
nor for me banging that hermaphrodite
和阴阳人交合找借口
in my dressing chambers.
我那时我那时就是个混♥蛋♥
I was-- I was a mess.
我怎么不知道后一件事来着
Don't think I knew about that last part.
别担心你比她好看多了
Don't worry,you're much prettier.
很抱歉各位
I am so sorry, everyone.
塔布
Tabu...
谁允许你
Who told you it was okay
让气流通过你的声带和嘴唇的
for air to pass through your lips and vocal cords?
没人
Nobody.
当然没人
Nobody, no.
现在去把给仆人们的礼物拿来
Now go get the servant gift.
去吧
Go!
这是普芬比利蒸汽机送给仆人们
It's a Puffing Billy,for your servants.
采用新技术快速吸除灰尘
New technology,sucks the dust right up.
嘀嗒神圣的时刻已经来临
Tick-tock,the time has come.
打开我送你的礼物我又大又粗的小香肠
Open your gift,my fat, little Wiener.
这是七蛇宝石
It's the jewel of the seven snakes.
据说每次触碰
They say every time you touch it,
都将导致世界上某个地方的村落
a village somewhere in the world
全面爆发食肉菌感染
is afflicted with a flesh-eating disease.
哦多么迷人啊
Oh, how charming!
哦查尔斯我一直想要一颗被诅咒的宝石
Oh, Charles, I've always wanted a cursed jewel,
自从我看到那颗血腥猫眼石在
ever since I saw that blood-soaked opal in...
摩洛哥展出
Morocco.
那是个多么美好的仲夏
What a summer that was.
当时我11岁
I was 11,
正处在女人一生中的性高峰期
the height of a woman's sexual peak.
我之前从未看过那么多的艺术大作
Never before had I seen so much art
以及体验过那么多次的性♥爱♥
or had so much humping.
直到今天如果没有尝庞兹的香蕉酱
To this day,I still can't look at an African
我就无法直视非洲人
without tasting Ponzi's semen.
皮珀斯添点香槟
Peepers, more champagne.
喳
Yes.
请原谅我
Excuse me.
哦简直是耻辱
Oh, the shame.
你准备去哪儿
Where are you going?
你直到三月份才有假期
Your break isn't until March.
我还记得当年我们不得不把男管家撤换掉的时候
I remember when we had to put our butler down.
霍顿斯小姐我不想多管闲事
Miss Hortense,I don't mean to be meddlesome,
但你的月经杯空空如也
but your menstruation cup is empty.
什么
Oh?
你要么就是提前进入更年期了
Either you've hit menopause early
要么就是怀孕了
or you're up the duff.
这不可能
That's not possible.
我不孕不育呀
I'm barren.
你怎么知道你不孕不育
How do you know you're barren?
从我八岁起我的妹妹们就经常这么说我啊
My sisters have yelled it at me since I was eight.
我曾经验过一堆女人
I've had my fingers in a lot of women,
我一摸就知道你是否怀孕
and I know a pregnant vagina when I feel it.
不
No!
哦这太糟糕了
Oh, this is awful.
我是说我没法怀孕
I mean, I was the barren one.
这是我独一无二之处
It's what made me special.
这是属于我的荣耀
It's my thing!
你难道不明白吗
Don't you see?
这是上天给予你的恩泽
This is a blessing.
你可以向你的朋友们道别
You can say good-bye to your friends,
跟你的作家梦说拜拜
your dream to be a writer,
每天只待在家里给你的宝宝
and simply stay home and wipe dirt
擦屁屁
off your baby's butt.
我得走了
I must go.
松鸡肝没法给自己去寄生虫
The grouse liver won't deworm itself.
等等
Wait.
一定有办法摆脱这个孩子
There must be something I can do.
据说有个偏方是
There is an old folk remedy
"自己从楼梯上滚下来"
called "throw yourself down the stairs,"
但这样会搞得一团糟
but it gets a bit messy.
你很幸运
Lucky for you,
我恰好知道这种情况下谁能帮你
I know someone who helps girls in this situation.
真的吗
Really?
皮珀斯
Peepers!
小甜甜皮珀斯
Sweet Peepers!
来人啊快叫医生啊
Somebody call the doctor!
不别叫医生
No, no doctors!
加菲猫去我房♥间
Garfield, go into my room.
在我床下
Look under my bed...
找我的铁肺
And find my iron lung.
- 好的 - 赶紧去
- Yes. - Go.
- 哦 - 去吧
- Ow. - Go.
好的
Yes!
准备好高脚酒杯
Get the sherry glasses ready.
整理好酊剂
Rearrange the tinctures.
补充些宵夜时吃的松饼
Refill the night biscuits.
等等停下
Wait, stop.
我天
My God.
我从未从这个角度观察过我们的屋子
I've never seen the house from this angle.
我们得开始新一轮♥大♥扫除了
We need to begin a whole new dusting regimen.
哦你在这儿
Oh, there you are.
我一直非常忧虑
I've been very concerned.
谢谢你夫人我感觉好多了
Thank you, madam.I'm feeling much better.