纽约屁民（2016）

Animals. S02E09

Part 5 Nov. 17, 2020, 11:30 a.m.

JK. But I really would have. All right.
开个玩笑啦但我没准真的会那么做好吧
Mission Food, engage.
目标食物行动
On the ground, our worm friends partake
在地上我们的虫子朋友用一种
in a rare practice known as the inch of shame.
被称为方寸羞耻的少见方式行进着
Inch, get it? 'Cause they're worms.
方寸懂吗因为它们是虫子
Hey, didn't I ask for a water?
我不是要了杯水吗
Dude, fucking Daphne was into me, man.
伙计达芙妮看上我了哥们
Like, I know it sorta ended on a question mark with all of us,
就像我知道最后不一定能在一起
but like, oh my God. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.
但就像我的天哪闭嘴别说了
She was fucking... Fucking shut the fuck up, okay, dude?
她真是... 你♥他♥妈♥闭嘴行吗老兄
Okay. Whoa, Phil.
好吧菲尔
No! No, no! The same exact fucking scene
不不相同的事情
played out that always plays out!
总会一遍又一遍的上演
Things were going great, and then you got us high on cocaine,
刚开始都很顺利然后你就带我们去吸可♥卡♥因♥
and then everything got ruined! We almost died!
然后约会就被你给毁了我们差点死了
Oh, I'm the problem? I think you're
是我的错吗我倒觉得
Yeah! conveniently forgetting
是你忘记了
that you were dragging down
是你让整个晚上
the entire table the entire night!
整个饭局都变得超级无聊
Things were going great with me and Laura!
当时我和劳拉聊得很好
You were talking about accounting the whole night.
我们整个晚上都在讨论会计师的事
Fuck you.
去死吧
She was looking at me!
当时她一直在盯着我
She loves the Snake Man! Are you kidding me?
她很喜欢蛇男你在逗我吗
I honestly don't want to be worms with you anymore.
坦白说我再也不想和你做同一条虫子了
I swear to fucking God.
我他妈对天发誓
All right, you can't Fight Club me two times in one day.
行了一天之内你不能吓唬我两次
That's not how it works, dude.
不能坏了规矩哥们
I'm not Fight-Clubbing you.
我没有吓唬你
I'm fucking scared.
我要被吓死了
Oh fuck, dude.
我靠哥们
Oh, here we go.
找到了
Okay, so this is a worm.
好了所以这就是虫子
This is what all the hubbub was about, huh?
肚子咕咕叫就是想吃这个啊
Yeah. I could see eating this.
我明白了就是吃这个
What the fuck are we gonna do?
我们该怎么办
Maybe the bird will think I'm a snake?
没准这只鸟把我们当成了蛇呢
Yeah, hiss at it.
说的是冲它斯斯啊
Oh God, it's not working! Is it working?
天哪这招不管用有用吗
Okay, maybe she'll think we're Eddie Murphy
要是我模仿一段没准她以为
if I do some bits. Do some bits.
我们是艾迪·墨菲来一段
Okay. Do the one about Chinese people!
好吧来中国人那段
Ah, that feels hard to say. Yeah, I know it's dated.
那段好难是啊我知道那是好久之前的了
It's dated. It's dated.
那段都老掉牙了太老了
Oh, you tried to get away, but you can't.
你们想跑但没用的
I got ahold of you with my little, tiny feet.
我用我的小爪爪抓住你们啦
Oh God!
天哪
You taste like sweat and... is it cocaine?
你们尝起来甜甜的这是可♥卡♥因♥吗
All right, I got this. I got this.
好吧我明白我明白该怎么做
This doesn't look appetizing at all,
那只鸟看起来一点也不好吃
but I can do this.
我能做到
Prey has become the predator.
现在捕食者又成了猎物
Oh God!
天哪
What is that? What is that?
什么鬼这是什么
Jesus. That does not taste good.
天哪一点也不好吃
I mean, the texture alone... that is tough stuff.
我是说就说口感这东西太硬了
All right. Worm number one.
好了第一条虫子
You got this, Matthew. And five, four, three...
你能做到马修倒数五四三
Oh God, you're so fierce.
天哪好可怕
Oh, okay. You're not a bird guy.
好吧你不喜欢吃鸟的
Mmm. That's not bad!
尝起来不错哦
Oh my God. And it's fields of them just ready to be taken.
天哪这才是我们应该汲取营养的来源
Wait a second. This is in our nature.
等下这才是我们的天性
Nature is supposed to be consumed by nature.
大鱼吃小鱼小鱼吃虾米
I mean, please, I'm gonna miss the marinara,
我是说好吧我想吃意面酱了
but I can figure something out.
但我得想个法子出来
Oh my God. Those right there could be croutons.
我的老天爷那个可以做成油炸面包块
That thing fucking chomped us, Mike.
那只鸟居然把我们咬断了迈克
Oh boy. I brought this upon us, man.
我的天哪这都是我招惹来的兄弟
I fucking wished for it. I'm sorry.
我居然希望我们被咬断对不起
I loved being worms with you, dude.
我很喜欢和你做同一条虫子哥们
You're my best fucking friend, man.
你♥他♥妈♥是我最好的朋友
You mean it? Yeah, dude.
此话当真当真兄弟
Oh God. That was a funny burp.
天哪你这嗝打的可真搞笑
Hey, Phil? Yeah, Mike?
菲尔怎么了迈克
Last night was the best night of my life.
昨晚是我这辈子度过的最快乐的时光
Me too.
我也是
This is it. I feel something, man.
这就对了我感觉有什么东西
I feel something happening.
我预感有什么事要发生
Papa? What the?
爸爸什么
I fucking regenerated, dude. Holy shit.
我居然繁殖出下一代了哥们我靠
It's Little Phil! I'm a fucking dad, dude!
这是小菲尔我他妈当爸爸了老兄
Hey, little dude. Invest in a 401k early.
小家伙提前开始交养老金了
Oh my God! A Little Mike!
我的天哪小迈克
Aww, he's got your smile.
他笑起来跟你好像
Oh my God. We're dads.
我的天哪我们是爸爸了
We're dads, dude.
我们是爸爸了哥们
I don't!
我才不...
You cannot say that anymore.
你以后不许再那样说话了
You can't say that anymore. That's...
你不能那样说话那是
Hey. What's wrong, Mike?
怎么了迈克
It's just... I guess that now that we're separate,
就是我想我们现在要分开了
we're no longer gonna be roommates.
我们不再是室友了
I think we should be roommates,
我觉得我们还能住在一起
just now we'll really be friends,
只是现在我们可以做真正的朋友了
because we're choosing to stay together, right?
因为我们主动选择要在一起不是吗
Choosing to be friends? Yeah.
主动选择成为朋友吗是啊
Hey. Jerk me off.
一起飞
Jerk me off.
一起飞
Birth. Regeneration.
出生繁殖
Adaptation. Great movie.
适应环境生命像电影一样壮丽
I got no sister
♪ 我没有姐姐 ♪
Ain't got no mom
♪ 也没有妈妈 ♪
I got an undeveloped wing
♪ 我的翅膀无法飞翔 ♪
And I'm gonna die soon
♪ 我将面临死亡 ♪
Oh my God!
天哪
Oh my God!
天哪
Fine. You know what? Just eat me.
算了知道吗吃了我吧
Who cares? Get it over with!
谁在乎呢随便了
I'm not much to speak of, just two eyeballs
我没什么好说的了两只眼睛
on a bunch of bones, so enjoy.
长在一堆骨头上请慢用
Hey! It's me!
是我啊
Charly! I'm back!
查莉我回来了
Oh my gosh! And guess what? I got worms.
天哪你猜怎么着我抓到虫子了
No! Yup.
不是吧对啊
You did it! Yeah!
你做到了是啊
Do we pay this guy or what's up with...
我们需要付钱给他吗还是怎么回事
I think he just lives on good deeds.
我想他喜欢做善事
Oh my gosh, thank you so much, sir,
我的天哪谢谢你先生
for saving my sister. Oh, save your breath.
救了我姐姐省省吧
He doesn't understand words.
他听不懂我们在说什么
Oh. He's a dumdum? It's not all there.
他是个哑巴不是那样
Okay. Thank you!
好了谢谢你
I'm getting nothing from him. See? Dead eyes.
我一句也没听懂他的话明白了吗死鱼眼
Okay. You ready for this?
好吧准备好了吗
I'm ready! Okay.
准备好了好的
Wait! Hey, hey, don't eat it all!
等等别都吃光了
What? I don't understand.
什么我不明白
Sound like... two words.
听起来像两个字
Open your mouth.
张开嘴