黑疯婆子的葬礼

看见绿灯了 你就可以走了
If you see green light, that mean go.
要是看到蓝灯了
If you see blue lights,
一脚油门到底
that means you better blow your engine
能他妈跑多远是多远
trying to get the hell away from 'em.
我给你看下我要怎么做好么
I am gonna show you something here, okay?
你这蠢蛋要吃枪子了
Your ignorant ass about to get shot.
玛蒂亚 发现问题所在了么
Madea, this is the problem, okay?
这就是那么多人吃枪子的原因
This is why so many people are getting shot.
因为他们违反法律 还不服从命令
Because they're not obeying the law, they're not complying.
又不是每个警♥察♥都很坏
Every officer is not a bad officer,
我们靠边停车就行了
so we just pulled over.
好吧 我以后你的墓碑上写
Okay. All right, I'm gonna put that on your tombstone.
除了那位把我打死的警♥察♥
"All officers are not bad officers,
其他警♥察♥都很好
"except the one that shot my ass."
求你们别说了行吗
Will you guys please just stop it?
我们都要死了
Oh, we all about to die.
我从来没想过我会这样死
I never thought I'd die like this.
我以为我会死在脱衣舞夜♥总♥会♥里
I thought I'd die at the strip club.
你想要我们停下来吗
You wanna stop?
好吧 看好了
Go, stop. Watch this.
你在干什么
What are you doing?
别往车外扔东西
Do not throw anything out of this car.
没有人要往窗外扔东西
Ain't nobody throwing nothing out the window.
我们不想吃枪子所以把手伸到窗外
We putting our hands out the window cause we don't wanna get shot.
我勒个去 这简直就是疯了
You know what? This is absolutely crazy.
我确定那些人就是因为这个被枪击的
I'm sure that's why all these people got shot.
知道为啥吗 他们不服从命令
You know what they were doing? They weren't complying.
小子 你真♥他♥妈♥疯了
Boy, you damn crazy.
你难道没看见服从的那些人
You ain't seen all the people complying
也一样被那些傻♥逼♥警♥察♥枪击了么
and the damn officers still shot 'em?
有个人躺在街上
Man laying down on the street
想帮一个病人
trying to help a patient,
结果警♥察♥还是把他打死了
and they shot him?
这些人并没有疯啊
All them people ain't crazy.
我会给你做个示范的
I'm gonna show you and teach you
当一位警官朝你的车走来时
that this is how you comply
你该如何服从命令
when an officer is walking up to the car.
你瞧着吧
All right, you'll see.
不 是你瞧着
No, you will see.
有人带手♥机♥吗 可以把这都录下来
Somebody get their phone out, so y'all can record 'em.
滚吧 我才不会去拿我的手♥机♥
Hell, no. I ain't finna reach for my phone.
他以为我要拿枪或者其他的啥呢
He might think that I'm trying to reach for a gun or something.
好啊 你要是拿个枪
Good! You reach for a gun,
他们就他妈会毙了你
they'll shoot your ass,
然后我就解脱了
and put me out of my misery.
你是说让他解脱了吧
You mean put him out of his misery.
不 我是说让我解脱了
No, I mean put me out of my misery
因为他要是死了 我可不就解脱了么
'cause if he dead, I won't be miserable no more.
我会有一份很好的保险
I'll have a nice little lump of insurance.
前面的车 熄火
Driver, turn off your engine.
真新鲜 他们可从没对我说过这个
That's new. They never said that to me before.
看来你一点都不了解警♥察♥
Boy, you don't know nothing about no police.
你根本不了解警♥察♥
You don't know nothing about no police.
我再说一遍 前面的车 熄火
Driver, I repeat. Turn off your engine.
他要生气了 他都说两次了
Oh, he getting mad. He done said it twice.
他们不喜欢说两次 布莱恩
They don't like to talk twice, Brian.
你最好让这该死的车启动
Hey, you better leave that bitch running
这样我们就可以离开这里了
so we can get up out of here.
爸 你们别说了 好吗
Daddy, I want y'all to stop, okay? Just stop it.
把你的脚从刹车上挪开
Take your foot off the brake.
布莱恩 他告诉你怎么做了
Brian, he telling you what to do.
别踩刹车了
Take your foot off the brake.
嘘
Shh!
现在把你的脚挪到油门上
Now put your foot on the gas,
让我们他妈的赶快离开这
and let's get the hell up out of here.
等等 他怎么知道你踩着刹车呢
Wait a minute. How he know your foot was on the brake?
别激动
Calm down.
当你的脚踩着刹车时
When your foot is on the brake,
刹车灯会亮着啊
the brake lights come on, on a car that works.
尾灯是连着刹车的呀
Oh, the tail light connected to the brake.
你看见没 他们就是这样抓到你的
You see that? That's how they get you.
就是这样抓到你的哟
That's how they get you, right there.
布莱恩 你要当一辈子怂包吗
Brian, you gonna be a wimp all your life?
走啊
Just go for it.
你知道图帕克是为啥被枪击的吗
You know why Tupac got shot?
他在等红灯啊
He stopped, at the red light.
你知道比奇是为啥被枪击的吗
You know why Biggie got shot?
他也在红灯啊
He stopped, at a red light.
所以 快他妈开车啊
So you need to go. Drive!
这太有意思了 你心跳都快了一拍
It's so much fun, your heart skips a beat.
你就不想当次勇士吗
Don't you wanna be a daredevil once?
你为啥非得这样规规矩矩的
Why you gotta be such a square?
玛蒂亚 好吧
Madea, all right.
我不会逃避警♥察♥的
I'm not running from the police.
我们今天不会那样做
We're not doing that today.
是吗 真的吗
Oh, really? Really?
我就要给你看看
I'm gonna show you that there is nothing wrong
被警♥察♥拦下来是不会出什么事的
with getting stopped by the police at all.
不会有事 你瞧着吧
Nothing. You'll see.
那可不好玩 海蒂
That ain't funny, Hattie.
把你们的手放在窗户上
Get your hands in the window.
天哪
Oh, Lord.
你好 警官 有什么问题吗
Hello, officer. What seems to be the problem?
把你的手放在我能看见的地方
Put your hands where I can see 'em.
没问题 瞧见没
Oh, okay. They're right here.
别动 别再动了
No, don't move! Do not move again.
我和你说了 你要把手伸出窗外去吧
I told you, you had to put your hands out the window, didn't I?
我只是把我的手放在方向盘上
I was just putting my hands on the wheel.
你今天想玩这种反抗游戏啊
Oh, you wanna play this resistance game today.
不 我在
No, I was...
他在服从命令啊 警官
He's complying. That's what he's doing, officer.
完全服从
Freely complying.
谁让你说话了
Who told you to speak, huh?
今天我说了才算什么是服从命令
I'll be the judge and jury on compliance today.
请出示驾照和行车证
License and registration.
别动
Don't move!
我刚刚说了别动
I just said don't move!
那我该怎么拿啊
Well, how am I supposed to get it?
让我看到你的手
Let me see your hands.
他们就在这
They're right here.
好 听我说
Okay, you're gonna listen to me.
听仔细点 这样你就不会再犯错了
Listen very closely, so there's no mistakes out here today.
左手食指
Left index finger.
左手食指 伸过你的身体
Left index finger. Reach across your body
然后打开那个杂物箱
and open up the glove compartment
用你的左手食指 先生
with your left index finger, sir.
他他妈的在说啥 用你的左手食指
What the hell is he talking about, "Use your left..."
我真想等会对他竖中指
I'm gonna use my middle finger in a minute.
闭嘴
Shut up.
我不知道 我不知道这怎么可能
I don't know... I don't know how that's possible.
先生 左手食指
Left index finger, sir!
当你够到那个储物箱时
When you touch the glove compartment,
把食指换成V字型手势
invert that into the peace sign
然后把证件拿出来
and grab the documents.
那怎么可能呢
How is that possible?
不许回我话 闭嘴
Don't talk back to me! Quit doing it!
该死 我应该给你买♥♥保险的
Damn, I should have paid your insurance.
等等 我的钱包
Wait, my wallet is...
别动 不许动
Don't! Don't!
你就配合吧
Hey. Hey, just cooperate.