窈窕淑女队（1992）

当你们今天早上起床照镜子的时候
When you got up this morning and you looked in the mirror,
你们就是失败者！
you were losers!
当你们今天早上来到这里的时候 你们还是失败者！
When you came here this morning,you were losers!
现在好好看看自己
Now look at you!
想要在这个世界上立足
To succeed in this world,
我们必须竭尽所能表现得有成功的范儿
we must do everything we can to appear successful.
所以当别人批评你时
So when people criticize you,
向你注入不安和自卑的负能量时
fill you with insecurity and self-doubt,
就大声地喊！
whip it out!
我很棒！我很完美！
I am great! I am wonderful!
我是万人迷！
Everybody likes me!
起立！
Stand up!
喊出来！
Whip it out!
我很棒 我很完美
I am great. I am wonderful.
我是万人迷
Everybody likes me.
我很棒 我很完美
I am great. I am wonderful.
我是万人迷
Everybody likes me.
坐下！
Sit down!
恭喜了 女士们先生们
Congratulations, ladies and gentlemen.
现在 已经万事俱备 你们可以去追求自己的成功和事业了
You are now prepared and equipped to take your rightful places
比如企业的领头羊
as captains of industry.
你们已整装待发！
You are ready and armed!
最后记住 当你获得职位后
And remember, when you get a job,
一定要保证你的上司要高你一等
make sure your boss is taller than you.
那样的话 就更容易拍他的马屁了
That way it's easier to kiss his ass.
我开玩笑的 玩笑玩笑
I make a joke. I make a joke.
好了诸位 起立！
Okay, everybody, stand up!
我很棒 我很完美 -我很棒 我很完美
I am great. I am wonderful. -I am great. I am wonderful.
我是万人迷 -我是万人迷
Everybody likes me. -Everybody likes me.
我很棒 我很完美 -我很棒 我很完美
I am great. I am wonderful. -I am great. I am wonderful.
我是万人迷 -我是万人迷
Everybody likes me. -Everybody likes me.
停下！
Shut up!
你好？ -我就提醒下你
Hello? -I just want to remind you,
你和马伦先生之间的会面
you have a meeting with the man himself, Mr. Mullen.
明天上午十点 在他办公室 所以千万别忘了
10:00 tomorrow, in his office.So don't forget.
目前为止这就只是一次普通的谈话 所以你别指望太多
So far it's just a meeting, so, you know, don't count on anything.
你开什么玩笑？这跟探囊取物似的
Are you kidding? It's in the bag.
还有我才不在乎你怎么想的 朱莉
And I don't care what you think, Julie
那些思想教育课 就是 冯肯普博士教的 真的管用
those seminars with Dr. Von Kemp really paid off.
祝你好运 切斯特 你值得拥有
Good luck, Chester. You deserve it.
我是切斯特 我很棒 我很完美
My name is Chester.I'm great. I'm wonderful.
我是万人迷
Everybody likes me.
我是切斯特 我很棒 我很完美
My name is Chester.I'm great. I'm wonderful.
我是万人迷
Everybody likes me.
嘿 切斯特 老子叫哈林
Hey, Chester. My name's Harlin,
管你是谁 在我眼里你就像一个巨型混♥蛋♥
and to me, you look like a giant asshole.
好吧 就算我是一混♥蛋♥ 那也是有原因的
Well, if I'm an asshole,there's a reason for it.
你就是混♥蛋♥源头
You're contagious.
哦 是吗？
Oh, yeah?
世界如此美妙 人间多么美好
All those beautiful people in this neighborhood
让我们美化家园吧
Hey, let's beautify the neighborhood
天呐 亲爱的
Oh, honey.
你还是呆屋里吧
Stay indoors.
我和你缠绵在去年夏天 但你也毁了我的春天
The way you made love last summer You ruined my spring
嘿 马修 接着
Hey, Matthew, catch.
接的真漂亮 你妈呢？ -不知道 我忙着呢
Nice try. Where's your mother? -I don't know. I'm busy.
嘿 马修 别靠电视太近 你看你眼睛都直了
Hey, Matthew, not too close.You'll strain your eyes.
不然一会儿你其他部位也得直了
And later on in other places.
猜猜我是谁 -汤姆克鲁斯
Guess who. -Tom Cruise.
不是 很接近了
No, close.
我不知道 你给点提示呗
I have no idea.You have to give me a hint.
是一个为了你 愿下火海
It's the man who for you would swim the deepest ocean,
上刀山 为你的笑容所倾倒的男人
climb the highest mountain and sees bluebirds when you smile.
你这疯丫头 -切斯特 嗨
You crazy girl. -Chester, hi.
噢 花啊
Oh, flowers.
行了 今天不是我生日 你又干啥坏事了？
All right. It's not my birthday.What have you done wrong?
亲爱的 什么都没错 一切都是对的
Honey, nothing is wrong.Everything is right.
明天早上十点 我要见见大老板 马伦先生
10:00 tomorrow morning,I'm seeing the big boss, Mr. Mullen.
我的升职志在必得 我都能听到咱俩婚礼钟声响啦
My promotion is in the bag.I can hear those wedding bells now.
啊是的 听上去不错 切斯特 不过我之前都听说了
Yeah, it sounds great, Chester,but I've heard it all before.
而且 马修和我比以前相处得更好了
And Matthew and I,we're getting along better.
去年圣诞节的时候我们还一点都合不来
Last Christmas we weren't getting along at all.
我送了他一把玩具枪
And I gave him a BB gun,
他给了我一件背上印有牛眼睛的汗衫
he gave me a sweatshirt with a bull's-eye on the back.
我的意思是 他有一种诡异的幽默感
I mean, he has a weird sense of humor.
比方说 复活节那天 他给了我一个装满了泻药的巧克力兔子
I mean, Easter, he gave me chocolate bunnies made of Exlax.
但是我们会填补我们之间的代沟 贝丝 宝贝 听我说
But we'll work it out.Bess, baby, listen to me.
我会成为那个他从未有过的父亲
I'll be the father he never had.
这件事永远都是第一位的 我们会度更多的假
It's going to be first class all the way.We'll take more vacations.
我们会去住最好的旅馆 -然后拿回比之前更好的毛巾
We'll stay in the best hotels. -We'll steal better towels.
嘿 我们会加入乡村俱乐部 -我们都会变成酗酒的势利眼
Hey, we'll join a country club. -We'll become alcoholic snobs.
我们会跟玛丽安和比夫闲逛 然后搭戴得的车 那真是活见鬼
We'll hang out with Maryann and Biff and take Dad's car. That's deuce.
我怎么会如此幸运？
How did I get so lucky?
男人 他们就只想要一件东西
Men. They only want one thing.
但如果他们不想娶我 那啥都免谈
But if they don't want to marry me,they ain't getting that thing no more.
反正不能嫁出去
Because if I can't sell it
那我就守身如玉
I'm gonna sit right down on it
直到我嫁出去为止
Before I ever give it away
太美了 太美了 -喔 切斯特
Beautiful, beautiful. -Oh, Chester.
本来想让你再唱一首的 但我现在很忙 是去见老板的时候了
I'd ask for an encore, but I'm busy.It's time to see the man.
然后一切都会更大更好了
Then it's on to bigger and better things.
所以 再见了 旧办公室 再见桌子 再见椅子
So, goodbye, old office.Goodbye, desk. Goodbye, chair.
你还没跟盆景们道别呢
You didn't say goodbye to the plants.
我平常跟他们唠叨得够多了
I talked enough to them plants.
有人说如果你太过友好了 那是无益的 你懂的
They say if you get too friendly,it's no good, you know.
好运咯 -谢啦
Good luck. -Thanks.
哦 我很高兴你终于没有跟我竖中指了
Oh, and I'm glad you gave me the right finger.
马伦先生将于两点参加董事会会议
Mr. Mullen's board meeting is at 2:00.
然后在四点时他将在一家新商场致辞
Then he has a new mall dedication at 4:00.
嘿 美女 你好吗？ -哦 切斯特啊
Hey, sexy, how you doing? -Oh, Chester.
嘿 不巧我有女朋友了 不过你是我喜欢的那种类型
Hey, too bad I'm spoken for.You're my type.
我喜欢戴眼镜的姑娘
I love girls with eyeglasses.
带她们回家 剧烈的喘息 你知道会做什么的 懂吧？
Take them home, you breathe heavy,you know what you're doing, you know?
嘿 告诉马伦先生 他最好的销♥售♥员在这候着呢
Hey, tell Mr. Mullen his top salesman is here.
你能卖♥♥任何东西 切斯特
You could sell anything, Chester.
我打赌有朝一日你也能卖♥♥点东西出去
I bet in your day you sold a few things yourself.
旧暖炉中的余温犹存 是吧 宝贝？
Plenty of heat left in the old furnace, huh, baby?
你知道 我还是不能相信你一直没结婚
You know, I still can't believe you never got married.
你的眼界太高了 这就是你的问题所在
You're too particular,that's your problem.
要不这样 我们假装打情骂俏直到你碰到你的白马王子怎么样？
What do you say we practice till you meet the right guy?
切斯特！
Chester!
我这就告诉他你在这儿
I'll tell him you're here.
马伦先生...
Mr. Mullen...
马伦先生 切斯特·李在这里等待您的召见
Mr. Mullen,Chester Lee is here to see you.
叫他等会儿 我很忙
Tell him to wait. I'm busy.
又一个以为自己该升职了的员工
Another employee who thinks he's due a promotion.
我得给他泼泼冷水
I have to let him down.
就像我所说的 大卫 现在 布拉德曾是个很棒的教练
As I was saying, David,now, Brad was a great coach,
但是我们现在不再拥有布拉德了
but we don't have Brad anymore.
亲爱的 我们需要一个新教练 一个知道自己在干什么的教练
Darling, we need a new coach.Someone who knows what he's doing,
这样以确保窈窕淑女队能永据鳌头
to make sure the Ladybugs stay a championship team.
现在 我们不会想让我们的女儿是这支鱼腩队伍的一员 不是吗？
Now, we wouldn't want our daughter to be on a team that are losers, would we?
就算是为了我 大卫
Do it for me, David.
你知道 我们喜欢做一些能让彼此高兴的事情
You know we like to do things to make each other happy.
按我说的去做吧 大卫
Act on what I've said, David.
美妙的一天 马伦太太
Good day, Mrs. Mullen.
那是马伦太太 她真是个尤物
That's Mrs. Mullen. She's very classy.
是的 非常惊艳
Yeah, very classy.
我听说当她开车的时候都翘着二郎腿
I heard when she drives her car,she keeps her legs crossed.
是的 先生 你可以上去了
Yes, sir. You may go up now.