瘟疫（2025）

好啦 安静 安静
Alright. Quiet down, quiet down.
行 谁给新来的朋友介绍一下水球
Alright, so for the new guys, water polo -
是个什么东西
What is it?
有人吗
Anybody?
一项运动
A sport?
能再具体点吗
Can you be more specific?
全接触 哇喔 -可以了
Full contact. Whoo-whoo! -Okay
还有其他人吗
Anyone else?
还有吗
What else?
就 在水里
I mean, it's in the water.
哎哟
D'oh!
来吧 各位 还有谁
Come on, guys. Anyone else?
你怎么样 中间这位
What about you, in the middle?
什么 我吗
What? Me?
对 -额 好吧
Yeah. -Uh, yeah.
额
Yeah. No. Um..
这主要跟是否能齐心协力有关
It's just about working together,
就像是
uh, like,
一个大家庭之类的
as one big family or whatever.
哎哟
D'oh!
还有吗
What else?
额 不 额
Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. No. Um...
多沟通 -别粘球
Communication. -Don't hog the ball.
好吧
O...kay.
我们要沟通
We have communication.
咱们有 -能拿住球
We have.. -Ball handling.
很好 非常好
Very good, very good, very good.
哦 真机灵 很不错
Oh, so very smart. Very good, very good.
哈哈哈 真牛啊
Ha-ha-ha. Very good.
额 你知道
Uh, you know,
只允许在这儿待一刻钟
you're only supposed to be in here for 15 minutes.
只有一刻钟哦
Um, only 15 minutes
在训练营的第一天 还活着
First day of camp.Still breathing
挺不错的对吧 -是
Pretty good, huh? Yeah. -No. Yeah, yeah
挺好的
Good.
我刚才跟你妈妈聊过了
So I spoke to your mom earlier.
不用担心 她是个好人
No cause for concern. She's a nice lady.
就是聊了几句
Just having a cha
她说你们刚从波士顿搬来
She said you guys had just moved from Boston.
对 -大老远的
Yeah. -Yeah, that's a big move.
挺刺♥激♥的 害怕吗
Should be exciting. Scary?
我记得 我是10岁那年搬到的圣地亚哥
You know, I remember, uh, moved to San Diego when I was 10
感觉就像踏上了另一个星球 懂吗
and that was like stepping onto another planet, you know?
总之 我是想要你明白 我不仅是你的教练
Anyway, I just wanted you to know I'm your coach,
还是在你愿意聊天时的倾听者
but I'm also here if you wanted to, you know, talk.
我知道这会让你有些不知所措
I know this whole thing could be a little daunting, you know?
好吗 -谢谢
Okay? -Thank you.
走吧
Go.
对了 得填一下这张愚蠢的表格
Alright, now we got to fill in this stupid form.
额 “我今年夏天结束前的目标是
Uh, "My goals by the end of the summer
空白 空白 空白”
are to blank, blank, and blank."
我勒个去
Holy shit.
显然是他妈的珠穆朗玛峰啊
Obviously fucking Everest.
...降落伞 -要是你想靠这玩意儿飞走
...parachute. -If you try to fly off that,
你♥他♥妈♥就死定了
you're fucking dead.
行 药味不错
Yeah, medicine tastes good.
所有樱桃和葡萄类水果都带着点药味
Any cherry and grape kind of both taste like medicine.
从珠穆朗玛峰跳下去啊 哥们儿
...Jumping off fucking Everest, dude.
我就这意思
That's what I'm fucking saying.
这他妈是我这辈子
This is the dumbest fucking argument
听过的最蠢的论调
I've ever heard in my entire fucking life.
你干嘛非得整些这个
.Yeah. Why did you even make that?
不好意思 抱歉
Excuse me.Sorry.
抱歉
Sorry.
你是不是嗑药了
Are you on something?
你明知道其他口味都比葡萄味好吃
You know any other flavor is better than grape.
好吧 好吧
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay
等一下
Hold on.
大家都喜欢葡萄
Everybody likes grape.
你倒是给我找出个不喜欢的人来
You tell me one person who doesn't like it.
已经有一个了
I've got one.
你是更愿意食物永远滚烫
Would you rather your food always be hot
永远没办法习惯这种温度
and you never get used to it,
还是愿意失去两个膝盖
it's always hot, or have no knees?
食物没膝盖啊 -没有膝盖吗
Food has no knees. -No knees?
你的膝盖已经没了 -你就没膝盖
Your knees, they're gone. You don't have knees.
没有膝盖吗 -额 等等
No knees? -Uh, wait.
我膝盖都没了 -是跟辣椒一样辣吗
I'd have no knees. -So hot like spicy?
食物本来就没有膝盖 -不 不 听我说
Food already has no knees. -No, no. Listen.
我甚至都没 -好吧 那你更愿意
I didn't even ---Okay, so would you rather -
选A的话
Would you would you guys rather A,
你们每次高♥潮♥的时候
every time you have an orgasm,
破嘴合唱团的《All Star》就会自动播放
the song "All Star" by Smash Mouth plays,
还是选B 每次放破嘴合唱团《AII Star》的时候
or B, every time the song "All Star" by Smash Mouth plays,
你们都会高♥潮♥
you guys have an orgasm.
选B啊 -去他妈的破嘴合唱团
B. -Yo, fuck Smash Mouth
选A会是什么样的情况
How does it play in the A situation?
就像有个小巧但声音强劲的收音机
On like a small but, like, decently powerful boom box
在你高♥潮♥时神奇地出现
that just magically appears when you orgasm.
还是选B吧 -选A
Still B. -A.
去他妈的破嘴合唱团吧 -选A
Fuck Smash Mouth. -A.
等等 过程中整首歌♥都会播放着 还是可以暂停
So wait, does the entire song play or can you make it stop?
整首都放
The entire song
选B -还是选A
Still B. -Still A.
你刚才说什么
What'd you just say?
什么 -你刚才是说能不能“汤”下来吗
What? -You said can you make it "sop"?
没有啊
No.
你刚才就这么说的
What'd you just say, then?
没什么 -他说的是能让它停下来
Nothing. -He said can you make it stop.
他没这么说 -他说了
No, he didn't. -Yes, he did.
没有
He didn't.
什么
What?
你说「停」
Say stop
什么 我不要 为什么
What? No. Why?
你说不出来咯
You can't say it.
谁能连「停」都不会说啊
Yo, who can't say stop?
我 我可以啊
Yes, I-I can.
那就说吧
Okay, then say it.
等等 等等 各位 你们是愿意
Um, wait, wait, so, guys, would you rather -
说啊 -额
Say it. -Um..
说啊 -好啦 你们是愿意
Say it. -Okay, would you rather -
哥们儿 他说不出来的
Bro, he can't say it
看他多不情愿啊
See how he doesn't want to say it?
赶紧说啊
Then say it
说 说 -好吧 好吧
Say it! Say it! -Okay, okay, okay,
汤 汤
Sop, sop, sop, sop.
“汤”吗 -真是“汤’
"Sop"?! -"Sop"!
是“停”
"Stop."
停 停
Stop. Stop! Stop!
你们不觉得这些胡萝卜味道怪怪的吗
Do you guys think these carrots taste weird?
哦 该死
Oh, shit!
是瘟疫 瘟疫
The Plague! The Plague!
哇喔
Whoa
说真的 最后有一股汽油味儿
Frankly, they have kind of a gasoline-like aftertaste
倒也不是很难吃
But not in a bad way, per se.
太刺鼻了 -走 快走
Certainly pungent. -Go, go, go
对我来说还算正常
They taste normal to me
直升机上可没有降落伞 -傻♥逼♥
No parachute on the helicopter. -Yo, soppy.
你会说“意大利面”吗
Can you say pasta?
意大利面 -意大利面
Pasta.-Pasta.