节哀顺变（2018）

Sorry for Your Loss S02E03

Part 5 Aug. 21, 2023, 3:10 p.m.

其实只有一小部分
it's, like... it's just a fraction of that.
其他时候，你就跟壁纸没两样
And the rest of the time, you're just wallpaper.
你们小时候
You know, when you were little
做完噩梦会爬到我床上
and you would crawl into my bed after a nightmare,
那种感觉…
it's like...
我觉得自己被需要了
then you just... you feel really necessary.
对吧
Right? Right?
然后…
And then...
你们满10岁后，就没这种事了
well, then you turned 10, and it just stopped,
我…
and I was just...
我很难过
I was just crushed, and...
我心想「不，没关系的」
and then I thought, 'No, no, you know, it's okay.'
「这是第二阶段」
'This is, like, phase 2.'
「之后会变怎样」
'What is this gonna look like?'
我…
I just...
我…
I just...
我没想过我会变得越来越不重要
I just never thought I'd start disappearing.
然后…
And then...
你搬回来，茱尔丝戒酒
you know, you moved back in and Jules got sober,
感觉就像…
and it was just...
你们做了宇宙史上最可怕的噩梦
it was just like you were crawling back to me
然后爬回来找我
after the worst nightmare in the history of the universe,
我知道这么想很糟糕
and I mean, I know that this is really ugly,
但有那么一瞬间
but just for a second, I just...
我感觉自己又完整了，你知道吗
I just felt really whole again, you know?
我…
And it's just...
没有人会教你怎么当妈妈
and they don't tell you that in mom school.
他们不会告诉你
They don't tell you that you're just...
你会把自己的一部分献给你的孩子
gonna give pieces of yourself to your children and then...
那些部分会活在他们内心
and that those pieces are gonna live inside of them
永远拿不回来了
and you're never gonna get them back.
天啊
Oh, God.
没人会告诉你，你会变成隐形人
And they also just don't tell you that you're gonna become invisible.
变得毫无用处
And also just completely useless,
如果没有火可以扑灭
because I mean, you know, how can you call yourself a fireman
你怎能自称消防员
if there aren't any fires to put out?
我是谁
So who am I?
当孩子不再需要我时，我是谁
When my children don't need me anymore, who am I?
我告诉你们吧
Well, I'll tell you.
一个盲目的傻瓜
A blind idiot...
一个懦夫的情妇
and a coward's whore.
谢谢招待
Thank you for the meal.
你今晚最好别回来过夜
Probably best if you don't stay over tonight.
伊薇
Evie!
对不起
I'm sorry.
把道歉留给你需要道歉的女儿吧
Just save your apology for the daughter who needs it.
请进
Come in.
你有睡吗
Were you able to sleep?
睡得很沉
Like a rock...
但充满了羞愧感
a shame-filled rock
我为昨天的行为感到内疚
who feels just awful about her behavior yesterday.
我很抱歉
I am so sorry.
你们不该那样得知我和李察的事
You didn't need to find out about me and Richard like that.
伊薇跟萨布丽娜还好吗
How are Evie and Sabrina?
别告诉我，我不想知道
Oh, don't tell me. I don't wanna know.
我本来想写邮件，重写了四、五次
I started an email, like, 4 or 5 times, and I just...I...
但都没办法寄出
I couldn't send it. I mean,
如果你见到他们，也许能替我…
maybe if you see them, you can apologize for...
算了
oh, no.
你要走了？　　你在做什么
-You're leaving? -What are you doing?
我得处理一些事
I've gotta fix some things.
我不能在这里做，所以我要离开
So I can't do it here, so I'm going.
不，别走
No, don't go.
爸爸和萨布丽娜会解决问题的
Dad and Sabrina, they will sort themselves out.
这和他们无关
It's not about them.
我的思绪很乱
I'm just curdling.
我想…这对任何人都不好
And that's... that's not good for anybody.
好吧，你要离开多久
Okay. For how long?
我不知道
I don't know.
你要去哪里
To where?
阿♥拉♥斯加
Alaska.
我在塔基特纳附近找到一间民宿
I found an Airbnb near Talkeetna.
那是个山间小镇
It's a mountain town.
好，为什么
Okay, why?
我没去过
Never been.
你就带这些行李？
And that's all you're packing?
你讨厌寒冷的天气
You hate the cold.
你没有雪裤或雪靴
And you have no snow pants or snow boots.
只有一件羽绒外套，它甚至不防水
You have a fashion puffer, and that's not even waterproof.
阿♥拉♥斯加有卖♥♥外套
Well, there are coats in Alaska.
好了
So...
这是应急文件
emergency documents.
我有传短讯给蕾西，让她知道情况
I texted Lacey so she's in the loop,
我们的账单都设定成自动转账了
and all our bills are set to autopay.
网上评论说…
The online reviews say that the...
民宿的收讯不好，但对街的咖啡厅
reception at the apartment is spotty
but that the cafe across the street has Wi-Fi.
有无线网络
还有什么事…
So, what else?
没了，就那样
Nothing. That's it.
我得赶快叫车了
I gotta call my Lyft soon.
不然我会失去勇气
Otherwise, I'm gonna lose my nerve.
告诉我，你们会好好过生活
So tell me you can do this.
请告诉我，你们会好好过生活
Please tell me you can do this.
好，我们会没事的
Yeah. We'll be okay.
你们已经做得很好了
You already are.
车来了
Oh, here he is.
好，我爱你
Okay. I love you.
我也爱你　　爱你
-Love you too. -Love you.
降落后传短讯给我们　　我会的
-Text us when you land. -I will.
好
Okay.
我们的心理治疗还剩下四次
We still have 4 more sessions of therapy left.
她没办法参与了
She's not gonna be able to go.
也许她会要司机回头
Maybe she'll make him turn around.
我打赌她明晚就会回来
I bet she's back by tomorrow night.
对
Yeah.
麦特的学校要办活动纪念他
Matthew's school is throwing him an event to honor him.
他们办活动纪念他是件好事
It's nice that they're doing something to remember him.
对，但他们不认识麦特
Yeah, but they didn't know Matt.
我不认为他觉得自己对这里很重要
I don't think he felt like he meant much to this place.
他总说这间学校让他变得多疯狂
He was always talking about how crazy this school made him.
丹尼　　要勇于在乎，老兄
-Danny. -Dare to care, man.
我改的时间比你写作的时间还长
I spent more time grading this than you spent writing it.
有谁想分享想法或回忆吗
Anyone have thoughts or memories?
我觉得你很擅长跟小孩相处
I think you're really good with kids.
我不知道怎么当爸爸
I don't know how to be a dad.
我只是在想有没有这个可能
I'm just wondering if it will ever be a possibility.
各位，格里老师的老婆今天也在场
Guys, Mr Greer's wife is here with us today.
你想说几句话吗
Would you like to say a few words?