好想做一次（2020）

-Sounds like Aneesa. -Who's Aneesa?
她就像我的杰克森医生 烂死了
She's my Dr. Jackson, and she sucks!
大家都说 "天啊 她好棒棒 "
Everyone's like, "Oh my God, she's so cool!"
"你们都是印度人 应该当好朋友"
"You should be best friends because you're both Indian."
-说真的 这样讲有点歧视 -什么？
-Honestly, it's a little racist. -What?
-她是印度人？你们应该当好朋友 -什么？不要
-She's Indian? You should be best friends! -What? No!
她姓什么？老家在印度哪里？
What's her last name? Where in India is she from?
-有兄弟姐妹念名校吗？-我不知道
-Do her siblings attend Ivies? -I don't know.
"我不知道"是什么意思？礼拜五邀她过来吃饭
What is this, "I don't know"? You invite her over for dinner on Friday.
可是艾莉诺礼拜五要来这里过夜
But Friday, Eleanor is coming over for a sleepover.
那更好 让她一起来 她一定不会讨厌你的怪朋友
Perfect. She can join. I'm sure she won't mind your weird friend.
-艾莉诺哪有怪啊 -拜托你
-Eleanor's not weird. -Oh please.
这下可好 你总算能交印度人朋友了
This will be good. I want you to have an Indian friend for once.
我跟表姐是好朋友啊
I'm friends with my cousin!
才怪
No, you're not.
你对卡梅拉很没礼貌 老是想害她变丑
You're rude to Kamala and constantly scheming to make her ugly.
她差点剃掉眉毛 因为你说很流行
She almost shaved her eyebrows because you told her it was a trend.
我在帮她 她变丑就不会被拐去卖♥♥淫
I was being helpful. She's not gonna get sex-trafficked if she's not hot.
也许这个印度少女会让你变好
You know what? Maybe this Indian girl will be a good influence on you.
她礼拜五一定要过来吃饭 就这么办
She's coming over to dinner on Friday. Conversation over.
我猜出我妈的网飞密♥码♥ 关掉限制级保护功能
I figured out my mom's Netflix password and turned off the parental restrictions.
所以现在能看讲脏话 露屁♥股♥的电影
Now we can watch movies with bad words and butts and stuff.
今天晚上一定超棒的
Oh, tonight's gonna be so lit!
两位女王好
'Sup, queens?
谢谢你邀我到你家玩
Thank you so much for inviting me to your house.
我可以带东西吗？零食 汽水 摇♥头♥丸♥？
Can I bring anything? Snacks, soda, MDMA?
-真的吗？-什么？
-Uh, for real? -What?
假的 对不起 我搞笑的
No, I'm sorry. That was a joke.
我拿不到毒品 不过我能拿到超上瘾的零嘴
Don't have access to drugs, but I do have access to some highly addictive snacks.
没关系 我们都准备好了
That's okay. I think we're all good.
好 那等一下再见了
Cool. I'll see you guys later then.
我觉得你邀她很好
I think it's great you invited her.
我们要给好人一个机会
It's important to give nice people a chance.
艾莉诺
Eleanor!
雪伦 你怎么来了？
Ugh. Sharon, what are you doing here?
-王妈妈好 -你好
-Hi, Mrs. Wong. -Hi.
小艾 今晚见
See you tonight, El.
嗨 小朋友
Hi, kiddo!
办公室氮气外泄 所以我想过来看看
There was a nitrous leak at the office, so I thought I'd come and see
你去外面过夜前要不要逛街
if you wanted to hit the mall before your sleepover.
喔 不用了 我还有很多功课要做
Oh, I don't think so. I think I have a lot of homework I need to do.
好吧 不过我有时也想跟你一起逛逛
Okay. But sometime, I'd love to have a girl-hang with you.
不然我们一起用抖音跳舞吧？
Hey, what if we do a TikTok dance together?
我看过很多母女这样做
I've seen mothers and daughters doing that.
我也学了不少很棒的尊巴舞步
And I've learned a lot of really cool moves from Zumba.
雪伦 我们不是母女关系
Sharon, we're not mother and daughter.
你只是我的后母
You're just my stepmom.
小姐 早安
Bonjour, mademoiselle.
早安
Bonjour.
-他是谁啊？-麦坎
-Who is that? -Malcolm.
你喜欢麦坎吗？
And do we like Malcolm?
当然没有 我的男友是奥立佛
No, of course not. I'm with Oliver.
那也不代表你不喜欢麦坎啊
That doesn't mean you don't like Malcolm.
那也不重要 他根本就不喜欢我
It doesn't matter. He doesn't even like me.
他这么有名 我却
He's basically famous, and I'm…
算了 我们回家时可以买♥♥汉堡吗？
Forget it. Can we get In-N-Out on the way home?
我饿了 我要吃双层肉三明治
I'm hungry, and I wanna house a Double-Double.
-买♥♥一杯奶昔两人喝好吗？-雪伦
-Do you want to share a milkshake? -Sharon!
迪薇为朋友过夜做准备时
As Devi prepared for the sleepover,
心里想着今天要好好对待阿妮莎
she promised herself she would be on her bestxa0behavior with Aneesa.
也许她只是反应过度了
Maybe she was overreacting.
阿妮莎又不是处处都完美
It's not like Aneesa was actually perfect.
金莎巧克力金字塔 好高雅
Ferrero Rocher pyramid! How elegant!
请进
Come in, come in!
开什么玩笑？
Are you kidding me?
这对印度人来说 就像糖果礼盒的劳力士
For Indian people, that's the Rolex of confection gift boxes!
阿妮莎 你好
Hi, Aneesa.
你已经见过我妈和我奶奶了 妈 奶奶 这位是阿妮莎
I see you've already met my mom and grandma. Guys, this is Aneesa.
-阿姨好 -你好
-Namaste, auntie. -Namaste!
你的身体怎么样？
How is your health?
亲爱的 我很不好 我全身老是在痛
Uh, very poor, kanna. My whole body is in constant agony.
你摸摸我的手 很冰吧？
And feel my hand. See how cold it is?
哇 超冰的
Wow, that is very cold.
阿姨 我要帮什么忙？
So how can I help out, auntie?
抱歉 没人问过我这个问题
Sorry, um, no one's ever asked me that before.
迪薇这15年来
In her 15 years,
从来没见过哪个朋友
Devi had never seen one of her friends
用她家人喜欢的方式打招呼
greet her family the way her family wanted to be greeted.
哇 我在路上喝了整杯思乐冰 现在非尿尿不可
Yo! I drank a whole Slurpee on the way over, and I gotta wazz!
脱鞋
Shoes!
对喔
Oh yeah!
请上楼 我要做最拿手的印度脆饼
Please, come upstairs. I'm just making my special pani puri.
你不能做披萨卷之类的吗？
Can't you just make pizza rolls or something?
我最爱印度脆饼了
Pani puri is legit my favorite.
也是我的最爱
That's my favorite.
我可以去厨房♥帮忙吗？
Can I help you prep in the kitchen?
不用 孩子 你上楼跟其他女生玩
Oh, no, no, kutty, you go upstairs. You enjoy with the girls.
好难过 法碧欧拉去参加机器人比赛
I'm sad Fabiola's away at a robotics competition.
她一定会爱死你 阿妮莎
She's gonna love you, Aneesa.
她也会爱死你徒手画直线的本事
And your ability to freehand-draw really straight lines.
好想赶快见到她
I can't wait to meet her.
如果她跟你们一样 我就邀她加入我的朋友圈
If she's like you, I'm stoked to have her in my new gang.
看到阿妮莎在自己的地盘从容自在 迪薇心里非常不爽
Devi was not loving how comfortable Aneesa seemed to feel on Devi's turf.
阿妮莎 你为什么从有名的私立学校
So, Aneesa, why did you transfer from a fancy private school
转来雪曼橡树这间烂校？
to a dump like Sherman Oaks?
我们图书馆只有山达基教会
Our library is just 100 copies of Dianetics
捐的100本心灵书籍
donated by the Celebrity Centre.
雪曼橡树高中不错啊
I think Sherman Oaks is cool.
你们也知道私校有钱女生的德性
You know how it is with rich, private school girls.
老是爱闹得很夸张
Like, so much drama.
这边也很夸张啊
Well, there's drama here too.
迪薇几个礼拜前办轰趴
A few weeks ago, Devi had a party
结果害全校最帅的男生被车撞
where she made the hottest boy in school get hit by a car.
我没害他被车撞
Mm, I didn't make him get hit by a car!
明明就是你害的
I mean, you sort of did.
他发现你交两个男朋友后就被撞了
It was right after he found out he was one of your two boyfriends.
哇咧 两个男朋友？我爸妈连一个都不让我交
Damn! Two boyfriends? My parents won't even let me have one.
我妈也不让我交啊 但我还是交了 这就是我
My mom won't let me date either. But I just did it anyway. Classic me.
哇 我没见过叛逆的印度小孩 猛
Whoa! I've never met a rebellious Indian kid before. Go off!
麦坎：你好 笑死
天啊
Oh my God.
麦坎史东刚刚发消息给我 他好幽默
Malcolm Stone just texted me. He's so funny.
虽然我没资格说人劈腿 但你还记得自己有男朋友吧？
I'm not one to talk about infidelity, but you remember you have a boyfriend?
我当然记得 我只是尊重演员同行
Yeah. Of course! I just respect him as a fellow actor.
你是很酷的人 我该回什么？
Aneesa, you're cool. What should I text back?
是亲亲的表情？还是眨眼的表情？
Like a kissy face? Or a winky face?
现在连迪薇的朋友 都问阿妮莎的意见了？
Now, Devi's friend was looking to Aneesa for advice?
太过份了
This had gone too far.
你知道要怎么比互传消息更好吗？
You know what would be better than texting with him?
-要是你溜出去跟他见面呢？-什么？真的吗？好耶
-What if you snuck out and met with him? -What? Really? Yes.
我从来没偷溜出去过 我也要
I've never snuck out before. I'm so down.
迪薇对这个计划有点紧张
Devi was a little nervous of this plan,
但是在2.0版的迪薇面前丢脸
but right now, the fear of losing face in front of Devi 2.0
比接受妈妈的惩罚更可怕
was scarier than any punishment from her mom.
好 那就等大家都睡着后出发
We'll wait until everyone's asleep and then we'll dip.
我不喜欢这里
I don't like it here.
这里很像叛逆青少年被杀的地方
This is like where bad teens get chainsawed to death.
麦坎？
Malcolm?
嗨 是我 艾莉诺
Hi! It's me, Eleanor.
跟你传消息的？记得吗？"你好 笑死"
From the text chain? Remember? "Sup, LOL"?
我怎么能忘记？过来吧
How could I forget? Come join me.