燃情克利夫兰

Hot in Cleveland S01E01

Part 3 May 4, 2020, 8:50 a.m.

that I should mention.
你怎么把房♥子租给了妓♥女♥
Why are you renting to prostitutes?
这位是爱尔卡·奥斯特洛夫斯基
This is Elka Ostrovsky.
她是随屋附送的门房♥
She's a caretaker who comes with the house,
前提是你们想留下她的话
if you wish to retain her.
她住在小客房♥里
She stays out in the guest cottage.
我不打扰了你们慢慢聊
I'll leave you to get all that worked out.
你好我是梅兰妮
Hi. I'm Melanie.
我租下了这房♥子
I'm gonna be leasing the place.
我已经在这里当了50年的门房♥
I've been the caretaker of this house for 50 years,
不过你可以把我赶走
but you can kick me out.
-我我不会... -没什么好担心的
- I-- I wouldn't-- - Oh, no worries.
能从纳粹魔掌里逃生任何难题都不是问题
If you can escape from the Nazis, you can handle anything.
你从纳粹魔掌里逃生
You escaped from the Nazis?
从纳粹魔掌里逃生跟我的其他磨难相比不算什么
Escaping from the Nazis was the least of my worries.
这话可不容易听到
Well, you don't hear that very often.
您老高寿百年人精吗
So what are you, like, 100?
姐不喜欢你
I don't like you.
你是不是电视剧里的那个女的
Aren't you that girl from that show?
是的我是你是粉丝吗
Yes, yes, I am. Are you a fan?
不是
No.
那部剧被砍时我大呼"砍得好"
When it was cancelled, I said, "Good riddance."
不过我很喜欢苏珊·露琪演的那部
But I do like that one with Susan Lucci.
你们有闻到大♥麻♥的味道吗
Does anyone else smell pot?
你谁啊警♥察♥吗
What are you, a cop?
不是
No.
那关你屁事啊
Then what's it to you?
等不及要告诉汉克了
I can't wait to tell Hank.
他说会打给我的
He said he'd call.
男人都说会打电♥话♥的
They all say they'll call.
是他是他
It's him. It's him.
真丢人
That's shameful.
我从1949年起就没正眼瞧过其他男人了
I haven't even looked at another man since 1949.
一旦丈夫死了妻子也就死了
When the husband dies, you die.
可你还活着
But you're not dead.
心死了
Inside you die.
不过这娇躯还是要保持得好好的
Oh, you still maintain the shell.
我要去约会了
I have a date.
25年来的首次约会
My first date in 25 years.
他邀我在"风高艇港"见面
He wants me to meet him at the windy highland marina.
你知道在哪里吗
Do you know where that is?
卖♥♥淫♥女♥去的地方
It's where whores go.
你已经老得不能这样放荡了
You're too old to act like this.
她不老 40岁现在只能算30
She's not old. 40 is the new 30.
50岁现在只能算40
And 50 is the new 40.
那80岁呢
What's 80?
还是80岁
It's still 80.
姐还是不喜欢你
And I still don't like you.
显然我有了个门房♥
Well, apparently I have a caretaker,
尽管不知道什么意思
whatever that means.
我还有了个约会
I also have a date.
汉克要在他的船上为我做晚餐
Hank is making dinner for me on his boat.
克利夫兰的水暖工竟然有钱买♥♥船
Plumbers in Cleveland can afford boats?
这太疯狂了
This is crazy.
你要为了在酒吧认识的某男彻底颠覆你的生活
You're uprooting your whole life for some guy you met at a bar?
你对他的了解到底有多少
I mean, what do you even know about this guy?
我只知道自己从未这样有活力
I know that I've never felt so alive.
知道吗
And you know what?
也许在我们这个年纪
Maybe at our age,
就应该有种豁出去的精神
we're just supposed to pounce on these things.
我的孩子们在上大学
My kids are in college.
安德斯已经开始了新的人生
Anders has clearly moved on.
我急着回洛杉矶回到那空空的房♥子做什么
So why am I gonna rush back to L.A. and a very empty house?
别等门哦
Don't wait up.
你要做什么
What are you doing?
做梅兰妮该做的事
What Melanie should have done.
谷歌♥汉克
Googling Hank.
-好主意 -我们来查下这男人的信息
- Good idea. - Let's find out about this guy.
关键词 "汉克水暖工克利夫兰
Put in "Hank, plumber, Cleveland,
风高艇港"
Windy highland marina."
网络的发明就是为了这个
This is why the internet was invented:
男人可以看到女明星的裸照
For men to find pictures of naked celebrities
女人可以网监自己信任的男人
and women to cyber-stalk the men they trust.
看很好有照片
Oh, look. Okay, here's an image of him
一个月前的
from a month ago with...
夫妻合影
his wife.
姐姐我好"意外"哦
Well, who didn't see that coming?
你想做的事情有哪些
So what would be on your list?
-说真话吗 -不用骗我吧
- Honestly? - No, lie to me.
真话是我一直想学...
Honestly, I have always wanted to learn
探戈
to tango.
是的
Yeah.
口含玫瑰所有花招
Rose in my teeth. The whole bit.
天呐我也想学
Oh, my God. Me too!
-是吗 -是的我们一起学吧
- Really? - Yes. Let's do it together.
那可真是我很想
That would be-- I'd really--
很想这样
really like that.
梅兰妮有件事
Melanie, there's, uh--
有件事我觉得应该告诉你
There's something I really think you should know,
我想过了可能向你坦白后
And I have been picturing myself telling you
随之而来的会是很可怕的场景
and coming up with these really awful scenarios.
他有老婆
He's married!
没这么可怕不过也差不离了
Not that bad, but kind of like that.
天呐
Oh, my god.
这就是你打算说的
That's what you were trying--
-梅兰妮 -天呐
- Melanie. - Oh, my god.
-梅兰妮别这样 -不要说了
- Melanie, please. - Oh, no, no.
别过来别说了别说了
Please don't. Stop, stop, stop!
你给我走人吧
You can just leave.
但这是我的船
But this is my boat.
快滚吧
Just go!
别说了
Please just don't.
亲爱的有什么能帮你的
Honey, what can we do?
我们宰了他
Let's kill him.
所有事情你都是这个解决办法
That's your solution to everything.
至少试一次嘛
Well, could we just try it once?
我只是想感觉年轻傻气
I just wanted to feel young and stupid.
现在只有傻气了
Now I just feel stupid.
又傻又老
Stupid and old.
你不老
You're not old.
40岁只能算25
40 is the new 25.
40岁不是算30吗
I thought 40 was the new 30.
反正都是胡说八道还不如说25
Well, if we're just gonna make crap up, I'd rather be 25.
-打扰下 -我叫你滚了
- Excuse me. - I said go away!
我有话要说
There's something I need to say.
你说的和做的已经够多了
I think you've said and done quite enough.
我去酒吧不是为了泡女人的
I didn't go to that bar with this in mind,
可三位漂亮非凡气质高贵的女性
But then three incredibly beautiful, sophisticated women
走进来与我共坐一桌
came in and sat down at my table.
继续
Go on.
梅兰妮你美得夺人心魄
Melanie, you were so breathtakingly beautiful
我是情难自禁
that I couldn't stop myself.
我是一个身陷不幸婚姻的水暖工
I am a plumber who's stuck in a bad marriage
我伤害了自己最不想伤害的人
and who hurt someone he never should have hurt.
对不起
I am so sorry.
作为高贵的女性
Well, for sophisticated ladies,
也许我们不应该那样突然闯进来
maybe we shouldn't have burst in on you like that.
可好姐妹有难
But when one of us is in trouble,
牺牲形象也在所不惜
then nothing else in the world matters.
妈呀我的经纪人
Oh, my god. It's my agent.
各位不许出声他以为我在巴黎