燃情克利夫兰

Hot in Cleveland S01E09

Part 2 May 4, 2020, 8:52 a.m.

当然可以的非常可以
Sure. Sure. It's cool. Very cool.
要我带你去客房♥吗
Do you want me to show you where the room is?
-我自己能找到 -是啊你自己能找到
- I'll find it. - Yeah. You can find it.
你很聪明的
You're good like that.
他能找到的
He can find it.
我希望到时候
I hope it's your daughter
为你养老送终的是你的女儿
who's gonna decide which home to put you in.
很开心嘛我们两个
Well, this is fun. The two of us.
终于有机会聊聊叙叙
Getting a chance to talk and catch up...
侃侃
and shoot the breeze.
学校那边怎么样
So how's school?
很好
Good.
看来你有不少话要说
Well, you certainly have a lot to say
对别人说
to someone.
-什么 -没什么
- What? - Nothing.
我也发短♥信♥ 潮语我都懂
You know. I text. So I get it.
不好意思你说什么妈
Sorry, what did you say, mom?
就那些缩写 "笑死我了" "我的天"
You know, LOL. OMG.
我的什么天
Om-- you know what--g.
妈只说字母不算是脏话
You know it's not cursing if you say a letter, mom.
当然了
Oh, sure. Sure.
F F[操]"F." "F!"...
听我说儿子
You know, honey.
我们一直没机会说说我和你♥爸♥离婚的事
We never got a chance to talk about the divorce.
如果你愿意我们可以谈谈
And we can do that, if you'd like.
不我明白世事无常不用谈了
No, I get it. Stuff happens. I'm good.
好的
Okay.
你知道吗
Did you know
克利夫兰原本的拼写是多个字母A的
that Cleveland was originally spelled c-l-e-a-v-e-l-a-n-d?
克利夫兰的拼写
The Cleveland spelling?
你竟然憋出了这句
You went to that?
我当时无计可施了
I was desperate.
对此你有何感想梅兰妮
And how does that make you feel, Melanie?
什么
What?
这问题让人抓狂吧
It's an annoying question, isn't it?
可所有的心理医生都会问
But all the therapists ask it.
我每天见一个
I've been trying different ones every day.
有点约会的调调
It's a little bit like dating
不过我不用隐藏自己疯狂的本性
except you're not trying to hide how crazy you are.
两位你们好
Hello. All.
维多利亚你还好吗看起来筋疲力尽的样子
Victoria, are you okay? You look exhausted.
太好了
Oh, good.
我确认下效果
I was just making sure
基金会的人马上就来了
'cause the foundation people will be here soon.
威尔的短♥信♥
Oh, that's Will's phone.
为什么除了我这个妈他跟谁都有说不完的话
Why is it he can talk to everybody else but not to me?
千万别责怪自己
You mustn't blame yourself.
我为我那两个孩子也是鞠躬尽瘁死而后已
Now I-I did absolutely everything I could for both my kids.
你有三个孩子
You've got three children.
如果这手♥机♥能说话该多好
Oh, if this phone could only talk.
你想的话就可以
Well, it can if you want it to.
你想知道的关于威尔的一切都在手♥机♥里
Everything you want to know about Will is right in there.
他的朋友他喜欢的音乐一切
His friends, his music, everything.
不行我不可以侵犯他的隐私
No, no, I-I can't invade his privacy that way.
我可以
I can.
不行快放下有人发短♥信♥给他了
No, put that down. Someone's texting him.
斯蒂芬妮发的
It's from Stephanie.
「告诉你妈了吗她有没有吓傻」
"Did you tell your mom yet? Did she freak?"
吓傻什么事有什么事要告诉我
Freak? About what? What does he need to tell me?
你自己找答案吧
Well, find out yourself.
扮成威尔回复她
Pretend you're Will and text her back.
我不能这么做
I shouldn't do that.
但作为母亲
But as a mother,
为了知道儿子出什么事了
I need to know what's going on with my son
可以不择手段对吗
by any means possible, right?
-的确 -完全同意
- Indeed you do. - Absolutely.
好的
Okay.
"我该怎么跟她说"
"How should I tell her?"
我不该这么做的
Oh, I shouldn't have done that.
我完全侵犯了他的隐私
I just totally violated his privacy.
我不会再犯了
I am done with this.
她回复了
Ooh, she texted back.
「你怎么发个短♥信♥跟老女人似的」
"Why are you texting like an old lady?"
你不该把所有单词都拼写正确
Ah, you shouldn't have spelled everything correctly.
「直接跟她说我们要结婚了」
"Just tell her we're getting married"?
我的妈呀
Oh, my god.
他才20岁
He's only 20 years old.
这女孩我都没听说过
I've never even heard of this girl.
对此你有何感想
And how does that make you feel?
"我妈就是早婚
"My mom got married young
现在还后悔着呢"
and still regrets it."
这样应该可以了
That ought to do it.
「你到底想说什么」
"Are you trying to tell me something?"
这都不懂她蠢吗
What, is she stupid?
"我们还是别太冲动了"
"Just that we should slow down."
「我H8你 D包」
"I h8 u, d'bag."
这是什么意思
What does that mean?
8可能是吃的谐音比如说我吃了什么
Well, 8 could be ate. Like, "I ate something."
D包是不是说好酷
And d'bag is like da bomb?
意思是「我恨你臭屎包」
I hate you, douche bag.
我该怎么办
What am I gonna do?
我害他们分手了他会恨我的
I-I broke them up. He's gonna hate me.
威尔回来啦
Oh, Will. Hi, honey.
你口袋里是我的手♥机♥吗
Is that my phone in your pocket?
还是见到我太兴奋了
Or are you just happy to see me?
改自"你口袋里是装了把手♥枪♥
还是见到我太性奋了"
老天这下流话真是太不合适了
Oh, god, that's all kinds of wrong.
不是我的手♥机♥
Uh, no. Mine.
-好吧我去冲凉了 -好的
- Okay, I'm gonna go shower. - Okay.
快怎么回复
Quick. How do I write her back?
我们爱听什么就回什么
Just text her everything we always want to hear.
就是啊夸她素颜很漂亮
Yeah, compliment her face without makeup,
和她上♥床♥的感觉无人能敌
and tell her it's the best sex you ever had.
这可是我的儿子
This is my son.
基金会的人到了
Oh, they're here.
好了
All right, uh.
我很想继续帮你友情出演你儿子
Look, I'd love to stay and help you pretend to be your son,
可我得去友情出演半死不活了
but I have to go pretend I'm dying.
你们好我是维多利亚·蔡斯
Hello. I'm Victoria Chase.
这位是洛丽·赫尔南德斯医生
This is Dr. Lori Hernandez.
我是罗伯特·穆尔医生
I'm Dr. Robert Moore.
很高兴见到你
It's a pleasure to meet you.
彼此彼此
Likewise.
恕我失礼这样盯着你
I'm sorry for staring,
你气色这么好让我很意外
but I'm just surprised at how well you look.
谢谢其实我感觉很累
Oh, thank you, but I'm tired.
非常累请坐反正我需要坐下了
So very tired. Please sit. I know that I need to.
太奇怪了
That's very odd.
怎么了
What?
你完全没有变瘸
You're not limping at all.
变瘸
Limping?
这个病的第一个症状就是变瘸
It's the first symptom of flett-giordano.
不好意思我稍稍失陪一下
Would you just excuse me for just one moment?
爱尔卡人呢
Where's Elka?
她说这个病没什么症状
She said this thing had no symptoms
害我在外面友情出演瘸腿豪斯医生
and I'm out there limping around like Dr. House.
爱尔卡说她查了维♥基♥百♥科♥的
Elka said she looked it up on Wikipedia.
维♥基♥百♥科♥
Wikipedia?
维基上还说我芳龄37呢
Wikipedia says that I'm 37.
我知道还是我给"纠错"的呢
And I should know. I'm the one who "corrected" it.
好了淡定