难以伺候

丹妮斯 关灯
Denise, lights.
来自比尔: 休斯敦整周都会下雨
谢谢你 丹妮斯
Thank you, Denise.
星期三
有谁今晚想去喝一杯吗
Does anyone want to get a drink tonight?
-我的天 当然去 -太好了
- Oh my God, yes! - Great!
必须去
Hell yeah!
-我们现在就去吧 -好啊 我无聊死了
- Can we go now? - Yeah, I'm totally down.
你们知道吗 多年以前
Did you guys know that years ago,
在克岛监狱 犯人们会抗♥议♥
Rikers Island, the prisoners struck
因为他们不想整天吃龙虾
because they didn't want to get served lobster anymore?
-为什么 -什么
- Why? - What?
因为他们那时候成天给犯人们吃
'Cause they used to serve it all the time.
而现在龙虾成了有钱人才吃的了
And now it's like rich people food.
什么
What?
-太蠢了 -这个好
- Stupid! - That's good.
太蠢了 但是是好笑的那种蠢
Stupid, but like funny stupid.
-我喜欢你的头发 很可爱 -谢谢
- I like your hair. It's cute. - Thank you.
靠
Fuck.
-很不错 -是啊
- Pretty good, huh? - Yeah.
-你想来一块吗 -不用了
- You want one? - Uh, no, I'm good.
来吧 你想来一块
No, you want a tot.
-好吃吧 -嗯
- It's good, right? - Mm-hmm.
你喜欢软式棒球吗
You like softball games?
软式棒球 你知道我当了十四年的捕手吗
Softball? Did you know I was a catcher for 14 years?
-真的吗 -所以我的胯完全是开的
- Oh, really? - And that's why my hips are really open.
因为你蹲着的时候 胯就是打开的
Because when you squat, your hips open up,
这样你就能劈叉了
and so then you can do the splits.
-你能劈叉吗 -横竖都行
- You can do the splits? - On both sides.
他对她影响不好 他会带坏她的
He's not good for her. He's gonna bring her down.
过去两周她都没抬过手
She hasn't raised her hand in the last two weeks.
谁 高个子艾利克斯还是怪眼艾利克斯
What, who? Tall Alex or weird-eye Alex?
-姐妹儿 怪眼啊 -他有双怪眼
- Girl, weird-eye. - He has a weird eye?
-你懂的 他就像... -我喜欢他俩在一起
- You know, he's like... - Ooh! I like them together!
不 不行 他们绝不可能对上眼 贝蒂
No, you can't. They'll never see eye to eye, Betty.
-他们对不上 -你太坏了 太坏了
- They'll never see... - That's mean, that's mean.
我就 再近一点
I'm just gonna-- Little bit closer.
你家有《呐喊赤子心》什么的吗
You don't have anything like Shout at your apartment, do you?
-我觉得我弄完了 -嗯 我也是
- I-- I think I'm done here. - Yeah, same.
大伙 我的胃有点不舒服
Well, friends, my stomach's doing janky things,
所以我先回去了
so I think I'm gonna just head out.
-什么 不要啊 -拜托
- What? No! - Aw, come on.
你猜怎么的 我也该走了
You know what? I should probably go, too.
-什么 -别啊
- What? - No!
要拼车吗 你想不想...
Hey, can we split a car? Do you want to just--
-留下 她留下 -行 好吧
- Stay. She's staying. - Sure. Okay.
我也该离开了
I should probably get out of here, too.
-像苍蝇般纷纷离去 -好 撤了 拜
- Oh, dropping like flies. - Okay. Gonna go, bye!
好了 再见 明天见好吗
Yes, okay, bye! See you guys tomorrow, okay?
-没问题 -大伙 今天太有趣了 对吧
- All right. - You guys, this was super fun though, right?
能认识了解你们每个人非常棒
It was awesome to, like, get to know each and every one of you.
-拜拜 -回见
- Bye. - See ya.
你说会劈叉还真不是开玩笑啊
You weren't kidding about the splits, huh?
对 没错
Yup. Yup.
比尔来电
舒服吗 舒服吗
Yeah? Yeah? Yeah.
-慢点 -这样更好
- Okay. Slow. - That's better.
-慢点 -我来动
- Slow? - I'll do it.
好
Okay.
-真舒服 -闭嘴
- That's good. - Shh.
怎么怎么怎么了
What, what, what, what?
我两周前做了胆囊切除手术
I just had my gall bladder out like two weeks ago.
-天哪 你还好吗 -嗯 没事
- Oh my God. Are you okay? - Yeah, I'm good.
-好的 -你还好吗
- Okay. - You okay?
我挺好的
I mean, I'm fine, yeah.
你不能直接把石头拉出来吗
So it's not the kind that you pass?
不不 那是肾结石
No, no, that's a kidney stone.
对对
Oh, right, right.
嗯
Yeah.
-笑什么 -没什么 就是太疯狂了
- What's funny? - Nothing, it's just crazy.
-没事 -好 继续 继续
- It's okay. - All right. Keep going, keep going.
西班牙2006
卡茨基尔和哈德逊河谷
泰国
老天 看看这些弹出广♥告♥
Aw, man. Look at all those pop-up ads.
欢迎来到布鲁克林角落民宿
请好好享受住宿时光
网络/无线网
网络名称
翻译 在这
Uh, translate. Right there.
好
Okay,
"如果你想像真正的布鲁克林夜间匪徒那样行事
"If you want to roll like a real Brooklyn night gangster,
"请致电或写信至此号♥码
"Then call or write a letter to this number
并说明你是查德的朋友"
and say you are a friend of Chad."
"长毛销♥售♥员
"The hairy sales person
不久将给你粘骨朵"
will bring you sticky buds in a while."
这网站很流行吗
This is a popular website?
是的 这网站针对那些想了解酷炫地方的游客
Yes, it's for tourists who want to know what's cool.
绝对解开了一些谜团
Well, it definitely explains some things.
谢谢你给我展示
Thank you for showing me.
你能给我发个链接吗
And, uh, could you send me a link?
嗯 我想翻译那些评价
Yeah. I wanna translate the comments.
希望你们享受剩余的旅程
Well, I hope you enjoy the rest of your trip.
-不好意思 -怎么了
- Excuse me, um... - Yeah?
你知道我们你在哪能找到班克斯艺术作品吗
Uh, do you know where can we find a Banksy art work?
我告诉你们一个小秘密
Oh. Let me let you in on a little secret.
我就是班克斯
I'm Banksy.
对 就是我
Yeah, it's me.
-快进来 -近来如何
- Hey, hey. Come on in. - Hey. What's going on?
就那样 你呢
Not much. How's it going?
老样子
Uh, not much.
谢谢你过来 老兄
Um, thanks a lot for coming out here, man.
很显然我现在不在家
I'm obviously not at home right now.
在一个朋友家
At a friend's place.
-嗯 没事 -那就好
- Yeah, that's cool. - Cool.
无论如何 谢了
Yeah. Anyway, thanks.
我们喝了一些酒 然后你懂的
We had some drinks and you know how it goes.
-懂 你好啊 -你好
- Yeah. Hey, what's up? - Hey.
这位是我同事 法拉德女士 法拉德太太
Oh, uh, this is my colleague, um, Ms. Farad-- Mrs. Farad.
-叫我凯伦吧 -凯伦你好
- Karen. - Hi, Karen.
布鲁克林夜间匪徒 我懂你
Couple of Brooklyn night gangsters, I got ya.
什么
What?
没什么 当我没说
Never mind. Forget it.
要头带大♥麻♥还是太空女王
So, uh, Headband, Space Queen?
都要
Both.
-行 一百块 -好极了
- All right, that's a hundred. - Great.
我能用微末支付吗
Can I Venmo you?
-通常他不 -我猜可以从现在开始接受
- Usually he doesn't-- - I guess I'm gonna start.
-天哪 -怎么了
- Oh, God. - What?
我觉得也许我犯了很蠢的错误
I think that might have been a really dumb move.
-怎么了 -他认识我老婆
- Why? - He knows my wife.
-我们每周都和他见面 -他不在乎
- We see him like every week. - He doesn't care.
如果他在乎怎么办 他们关系挺好的
What if he does, though? They kind of have a rapport.
她还帮他拔过脚上的肉刺呢
She took a splinter out of his foot one time.
我跟你保证 只要你出钱买♥♥他的大♥麻♥
I promise you, as long as you pay him for weed,
他就根本不会在乎
he couldn't care less.
也对 你可能是对的
No, yeah, yeah. You're probably right.
对 他不会跟雷根说什么的
Yeah, he wouldn't say something to Reagan.
没必要
Why would he?
我在这里除了开放的夜晚什么都没有
I got nothing but open nights here.
-我真♥他♥妈♥讨厌当老师 -我也是
- I fucking hate being a teacher. - Oh, me too.
周四约吗
Thursday?
好
Um, yeah.
不 我周四可能得回家
Well, no, I should-- I should probably be home on Thursday.
反正比尔要23号♥才回休斯顿
Well, Bill's gonna be in Houston till the 23rd, so...