离婚

我打算约你出去
I was about to ask you out.
我问过罗伯特了 他完全没意见
I ran it by Robert, and he's totally cool with it.
他在许可单上签字了吗
Did he sign the permission slip?
《离婚》前情提要
我明晚可以带晚餐过去
I was thinking I could bring dinner over tomorrow night.
你为什么想那样做
Why the hell would you wanna do that?
我希望你和亨利见面
I would like you to meet Henry.
-见新男人啊 -是啊
- Meet the new man. - Mm-hmm.
好啊
Yeah... yeah!
我是泰勒的祖父 那个小偷
I'm Taylor's grandfather. The shoplifter.
有敌意的祖父
Hostile grandpa.
你让我明白了
You straightened me out.
我感觉我欠你一顿晚餐
I feel like I owe you a dinner.
亨利 杰里米 他征求我的许可
Henry, this guy, Jeremy, asks my permission
想约弗朗西丝出去
to ask Frances out on a date.
我讨厌弗朗西丝跟杰里米约会
I hate the idea of Frances going on a date with Jeremy.
我都没跟她结婚了
And I'm not even married to her anymore.
不 我希望弗朗西丝做她喜欢做的事
No, I want Frances to do whatever she likes.
我打算选择相信你不是那意思
You know what? I'm gonna choose to believe you don't mean that.
我不明白了 结局是什么
I don't understand. How did you leave it?
谁知道呢 但显然
Oh, who knows? But apparently,
我想做什么都可以
I'm at liberty to do whatever I want.
我还是觉得你应该按他的话去做
I mean, I still say you should take him at his word.
他说你想做什么都可以
He said you could do whatever you want,
那就继续啊
so proceed.
空车道
Open lane.
玩一玩
Whip it out.
天啊 拜托别闹了 这是一次高中篮球之旅
Oh, God, please stop. It's a high school basketball trip.
没人要玩什么
Nobody's whippin' anything out.
-你能打开后备箱吗 -好的
- Can you pop the trunk? - All right.
你又不是加入了第12大街
I mean, it's not like you're jumping into some wild orgy
一间奇怪公♥寓♥里纵情狂欢
in a weird apartment on 12th Avenue.
这叫跟别人约会
It's called "Seeing other people."
别说了
Stop.
好吧
All right,
我想我比你还享受这事
I guess I'm just having more fun with this than you are.
我想是的
I guess you are.
好吧 朋友 那就是
Okay, and that, my friend,
问题所在
is the trifle in question.
12点方向 罗马人长相
Twelve o'clock. Roman profile.
格子围巾
Tartan scarf.
-那是杰里米吗 -是啊
- That's Jeremy? - Mm-hmm.
没错
Yep, yep, yep, yep.
我求你了 为了我们所有人 睡了他吧
Oh, I beg of you, please fuck him for all of us.
天啊
Oh, God.
离婚 第三季第五集
该死 我找不到我的手♥机♥了
Goddammit. I can't find my phone.
你能给我打电♥话♥吗
Can you call it?
小混♥蛋♥在那里啊
There's that little prick.
我正式疯了
Officially losing my shit.
手♥机♥在药柜里
It was in the medicine cabinet.
你脑子里有很多事情
Well, you have a lot on your mind.
很多分心的事情
A lot of distractions.
这的确是个重要的周末
Well, it is a big weekend.
-压力很大 -至少弗朗西丝会在
- You know, stressful. - At least Frances will be there.
那挺有趣的 一点额外奖励
That's fun. A little bonus.
不管怎样我都不在乎
Like, I don't really care one way or the other.
她只是监护人
She's just a chaperone.
希望你俩有机会玩一玩
Well, hopefully you guys will get to hang out a little bit.
杰姬
Jackie.
你得停止这样了
You really gotta stop with this stuff.
拜托
Come on.
我不再爱她了 好吗
I don't have feelings like that for her anymore, okay?
-莱拉 这里 -莱拉
- Lila, over here! - Hey, Lila.
我带了你的谷物棒 盐水喷雾剂
I, um, got your Kind bars, saline spray.
别忘了你要和我联♥系♥
Oh, and don't forget you've gotta check in with me.
-记住 -妈妈 你让我丢脸了
- Remember... - Mom, shhh, you're embarrassing me.
莱拉 这只是给你送吃的
Lila, it's a... it's a food hand-off.
我又没在停车场跳机械舞
It's not like I'm doing "The robot" In the parking lot.
但我可以哦
But I could.
-妈妈 -怎么了
- Mom? - What?
我只是这周末想和朋友待一起
I just wanna be with my friends this weekend.
别觉得难过
Don't feel bad,
尽量别跟我说话
just try not to talk to me,
开玩笑 或者在我附近
joke around, or be anywhere near me.
一直都是这样吗
The entire time?
妈妈 是的 天啊
Mom, yes, oh, my God!
好吧
All right.
你好严格哦
You're so strict!
好吧
Okay.
我叔叔在教我弹班卓琴
My uncle's teaching me the banjo.
真的吗
Oh, really?
我妈妈讨厌班卓琴
My mom hates banjos.
她说 水淹到
She says, "What do you call
一百个班卓琴演奏者的脖子了 该怎么说
a hundred banjo players up to their necks in water?"
我不知道 怎么说
I don't know, what?
水不够
"Not enough water."
好吧
Oh, yeah. Yep.
这个嘛
Well...
品味不同
Different tastes.
纽约州心理考试委员会职业纪律办公室
他有
He has...
我会说 收藏了50个班卓琴
I wanna say, like, 50 banjos in his collection.
有一个是19世纪的 价值大概
One's from the 19th century, and it's worth, like...
说真的 下次你去罗德岛时
Seriously, the next time you're in Rhode Island,
应该去他的班卓琴博物馆
you should go to his banjo museum.
甚至还有一个买♥♥三明治的小房♥间
There's even a little room where you can buy sandwiches.
我只是
I'm just...
很少去那边
so rarely up that way.
女孩们 听好了
Okay, girls. Listen up, listen up.
这是一次正式的学校旅行
This is an official school trip,
所以学校的行为准则是适用的
so school rules of conduct apply.
有什么规则
All right, what are those rules?
不喝酒 不抽烟 不诈骗
No drinking, no smoking, no wire fraud,
不做任何不当行为
no malfeasance of any kind.
你违反了规则
You break one of these rules,
就不能在比赛中上场了
you're gonna have to sit the game.
好了 抛开这些
All right, now, that aside,
我想说我为这支队伍有多骄傲
I just wanna say how proud I am of this team.
这一赛季你们真的激励了我
You girls really inspired me this season.
我希望也许
And I just hope that maybe
我成功激励了
I've managed to inspire...
天啊 是杰森·坎贝尔
Oh, my God, it's Jason Campbell!
天啊 你得看看我们身后的女人
Oh, my God, you've got to see this woman right behind us.
但是别盯着
Don't stare, though.
她的胸部在她的初中毕业舞会上肯定不是这样的
Her tits sure didn't look like that at her junior prom.
无酒精血腥玛丽尝起来像是
These virgin Bloody Marys taste like
有人尿进了一罐汽油里
somebody pissed into a can of V8.
我真的很享受你的陪伴 黛安
I really enjoy your company, Diane.
我的确会让人们觉得愉快
Yes, I do have that effect on people.
别人跟我说 我是个小爆竹
And I've been told that I'm a bit of a firecracker.
你 你
And, well, you... you...
你有
you have...
你有种迷人的魅力
you... you have sort of an appealing zing about you.
我们为协议加点胶水怎么样
What do you say we add a splash of glue to this little accord?
抱歉 给什么加点什么
I'm sorry, a splash of what to this little what-what?
我们都享受美食 谈话
We both enjoy good food, conversation.
我喜欢看电影 旅行
I love the theater, traveling.
我觉得我们会是有趣的组合
I think we'd make a fun combo.
有趣是个很大的词
Well, fun is a big word.
我想带你看样东西
I'd like to show you something.
我不知道