崩溃人生（2017）

Crashing S01E04

Part 3 July 15, 2020, 11:20 a.m.

我的俱乐部就在那边我传♥单♥发得挺不错
My club is right down there. I got a good thing going.
喜剧格林威治喜剧俱乐部很棒的演出
Comedy. Greenwich Comedy Club. Great show.
你看他们朝着我的俱乐部方向去了
You see? They're walking towards my club.
我才离开了多久三分钟吗
What was I gone, three minutes?
三分钟如果你有个停车位
Three minutes, so if you have a parking spot
然后你开走三分钟
and you drive off for three minutes,
这个停车位是不是下半辈子
is that supposed to be your parking spot
都是你的了
for the rest of your life?
你认为城规是这样的吗
Is that how you think cities work?
我明白你这个类比但这不是个停车
I understand the comparison, but this isn't a parking--
滚吧
Just walk away.
不我只是我们能不能
No, I'm just-- Could we--
滚开
Walk away.
天啊
Geez.
-滚开 -好吧
- Walk away. - I-- Okay.
超棒的现场喜剧秀想看喜剧吗小姐
Great live comedy. Would you like to see some comedy, Miss?
真的是很棒的演出你会喜欢的
It's a really nice show. I think you'll like it.
今晚我们那有吉姆·加菲根出席吉姆
Hey, we got Jim Gaffigan tonight. Jim--
拜托哥们
Come on, man.
今晚有现场喜剧秀
Live comedy tonight!
就在波士顿喜剧俱乐部
Boston Comedy Club!
今晚我们那有戴夫·查普尔出席哥们
Hey, we got Dave Chappelle tonight, man.
戴夫·查普尔
Dave Chappelle!
就知道你喜欢戴夫看过《抢救肯尼小子》吧
I know you like Dave! Half-Baked? Half-Baked?
你喜欢太棒了
Yes, you love it. Hey, cool.
今晚的现场喜剧秀
Live comedy tonight!
-波士顿喜剧... -你怎么样哥们
- Boston Comedy... - What's up, man?
-干嘛 -我遇上个麻烦
- What? - I'm having a problem.
有个格林威治喜剧俱乐部的人过来
Somebody from the Greenwich Comedy Club came over
想把我从那个街角挤走
and they're trying to shake me from my corner.
-有人要把你从你的街角挤走 -是的
- Someone shook you from your corner? - Yes.
为什么你说得好像你在《火线》里似的
Why the fuck are you talking like you in The Wire?
美国HBO电视台2002年播出的罪案电视剧
我没看过《火线》
I haven't seen The Wire.
-什么 -我不想告诉别人
- What? - There's no good way
我没看过《火线》
to tell people you haven't seen The Wire.
这个人占了我的街角
Look, this guy is on my corner.
我只是想问问你我该怎么处理这种情况
I'm just asking you how-how do I handle that?
我不知道该跟你说什么好
Listen, man. I don't know what to tell you. All right?
你不竭尽全力就不会有进展
'Cause if you don't get five, you don't get on.
你会怎么做
What would you do?
我会告诉那个人从我的街角滚开
I would tell the guy to get the fuck off my corner.
-你觉得有用吗 -你现在就没滚啊
- You think that would work? Just... - It's not working now!
-好吧 -好的
- Okay. - Okay!
我这就走因为我是一个通情...
I will leave because I'm a reason--
-对不起 -做个通情达理人然后就离开吧
- I'm sorry. - Be reasonable and leave!
-我就是 -走
- I'm being... - Go!
谢谢
Thank you.
超棒的现场喜剧秀
Great live comedy.
喜剧
Comedy?
不看吗
No?
超级棒的现场喜剧
Great live comedy.
女士们今晚有超棒的现场喜剧秀
Hey, ladies, great live comedy tonight,
离这只有几个街区
just a couple blocks away.
恭喜
Congratulations.
今晚有场超棒的现场喜剧秀
Great live comedy tonight.
沿着路走三个街区然后右转
It's just three blocks this way, to the right,
左手边第一个街区就是
one block up on your left.
我们在找蓝调酒吧
Uh, we are looking for the Blue Note.
我们今晚有超棒的现场喜剧秀
We got-we got a great live comedy show though.
你们一定会喜欢的单口相声
You guys would love it. Stand-up comedy.
不不不不看喜剧爵爵
No, no, no... No, no comedy. Uh... Jaejue.
爵士
Yeah, jazz.
跳得不错
There you go.
这家伙有点奇怪我喜欢
This guy's weird. I like that.
蓝调酒吧就在第三大道
Yeah, the Blue Note's on Third.
你就往前走到那里往右一转
Uh, you're just gonna go up there, bang a right.
就看到它了
You'll-you'll run into it, actually.
非常感谢
Thank you so much.
不用客气好好玩
You're welcome. Enjoy.
好好好嗯
Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
嗯嗯
Yeah, all right, yeah.
超棒的现场喜剧秀
Great live comedy?
我还会爵士乐口♥技♥
I also do jazz sounds.
我们有超级棒的喜剧现场秀先生
We got a great live comedy show, sir.
-抖一下 -不用谢谢
- Flick. - No, thank you.
哥们超棒的现场喜剧秀
Hey, guys. Great live comedy?
我们有超棒的现场喜剧秀买♥♥♥一♥送♥一♥
We got a great live comedy show. Two for one.
你们喜欢杰瑞·宋飞吗
You guys like Jerry Seinfeld?
好的我们下次再见
Cool. I'll see y'all next time.
好的
All right, man.
太对不起了我没...
I'm so sorry. I-I didn't--
我不知道你们在做生意
I didn't know it was business.
我不是缉毒刑♥警♥
And I'm not a narc.
缉毒刑♥警♥一般会说"我不是缉毒刑♥警♥"
I'm sure that's what narcs say, "I'm not a narc."
他们才不会说"我是缉毒刑♥警♥"
They're not gonna say, "I'm a narc."
他们要这么说就太蠢了
That would be a really bad strategy for a narc.
我真的非常抱歉
I'm really sorry.
你有没有兴趣看喜剧演出
Do you have any interest... in a comedy show?
他们付给你多少钱发这些传♥单♥
How much they pay you to pass those flyers out?
不
Yeah, no.
我没有钱可赚我把这些发出去
I-I don't get paid. I hand these out.
如果有五个人来买♥♥票观看
And if five people pay to come in,
我就可以登台演出
then I get to perform.
那你演出他们付给你多少钱
Well, how much do they pay you to perform?
他们不用付给我钱
They don't-they don't pay me to perform.
这事吧是无偿的
It's... the whole thing is kind of gratis, you know?
靠
Fuck.
是啊
Yeah.
没事
It's all right.
我知道这有点奇怪但可以给我一些建议吗
I know this is weird, but could I ask you some advice?
当然
Yeah.
如果有个人... 比如说这是你的地盘
If somebody, like... This is your turf, right?
然后有人偷了你的地盘
And if somebody stole your turf,
你怎么把地盘夺回来
how would you-how would you get it back?
我还真不清楚
I mean, I don't really know.
实话跟你说我并没有什么地盘之类的
To be honest with you, I don't really have like, a turf.
我就是脸上带着一副
You know, I just kind of walk around
"老子有大♥麻♥"的表情到处走走
with a look on my face that says, "I have weed."
-大♥麻♥表情 -对
- Weed face. - Yeah.
有人怼你了吗
I mean, someone's up in your shit?
是的我...
Yeah. You know, I...
我不知道该怎么办
I don't know what to do.
如果你去了一趟洗手间
I mean, what would you do
回来后发现有个人占了你的地盘
if-- if you went to the bathroom and came back
你会怎么做
and there was another guy here?
我会处理好自己的事情
I'd just handle my business.
那你具体要怎么样处理自己的事情呢
Okay, but how specifically would you handle your business?
我会夺回来
I'd get mine.
跟他干像个男人爷们一点
Set it off. Be a man. Man up.
表明立场
You know, represent, man.
表现态度吗
Like represent an attitude?
你得做出改变
You gotta flip the switch, man.
积极采取行动
You gotta light it up.
抱歉你说的这些听起来就像
Sorry, a lot of these sound like lyrics
《千禧年》专辑里的歌♥词
from the album Willennium.
我需要真正的生活中的建议
I need like, real, like, life application...
步骤之类的
like steps.
听着你要强势一点有点底气
Look, man, just be loud and opposin'.
你可是一个大块头伙计
I'm mean, you're a giant, man.
你这么高大