保佑哈特

Bless The Harts S02E18

Part 1 April 20, 2021, 11:37 a.m.

谁放屁了
Oof, who farted?
不是我我这辈子都没放过屁
It wasn't me. I haven't farted a day in my life.
你们谁放的老实交代
Which one of you did it? Fess up.
请别说屁了
Please stop talking about farts.
我们能回到外婆说
Can we circle back to Gram saying
她这辈子从没放过屁吗
she's never farted a day in her life?
-烧烤好了 -我不吃
- 'Cue's up! - Ugh, none for me.
因为你臭气熏天的后院我已经没了胃口
I lost my appetite due to your ass-smelling yard.
嗯今年臭鼬的数量暴涨
Oh, yeah. The skunk population is exploding this year.
不知道发生了什么但是臭鼬度过了
I don't know what happened, but the skunks have had
一个很饥渴的春天
a very horny springtime.
这个饥渴的春天
Well, that horny springtime
正在变成一个恶臭的夏天
is turning into a very stanky summer.
-你得把这清理了 -它们不在我的院子里
- You need to clean this up. - They're not in my yard.
是夏卡巴蒂大夫的我去找她
It's Dr. Chakrabarti's. I'll go talk to her.
你好韦恩
Hi, Wayne.
别拍我马屁夏卡巴蒂大夫
Okay, now, don't try to sweet-talk me, Dr. Chakrabarti.
你得对你的院子做点什么
You got to do something about your yard.
我的院子我们已经就此事谈过了韦恩
My yard? We've been over this, Wayne.
我为什么会允许臭鼬在我的地盘上季节性群♥交♥
Why would I allow a seasonal skunk orgy on my land, huh?
它们麝香气味的性♥爱♥毁了我的帕帕桑椅子
They ruined my papasan chair with their musky lovemaking.
不不不这些臭鼬是你的问题韦恩
No, no, no. These skunks are your problem, Wayne.
不夫人我的土地止于那个车轮
No, ma'am. My property ends at that truck tire.
所以才放了个车轮在那
That's why the truck tire's there.
不不不我的土地止于那个彩虹球
No, no, no. My land stops at the iridescent orb.
夏卡巴蒂大夫彩虹球不具有法律效力
Dr. Chakrabarti, an iridescent orb is not legally binding.
轮胎也没有
Neither is a truck tire.
我们要彻底解决这事
Okay, we're gonna settle this once and for all.
争议土地就在此
The land in dispute is right here.
臭鼬镇
Skunktown.
臭鼬镇是什么鬼
What the hell is Skunktown?
又是一个错过了
Yet another person who missed
我关于绿点历史的
my five-part library lecture series
五部图书馆讲座系列的人
on the history of Greenpoint.
我怎么会错过的
Oh, how did I miss that?
你能简单给我们讲讲吗
Yeah, could you just give us a quick...
臭鼬最初在1794年殖民了这块土地
Skunks first colonized this land in 1794.
欧洲殖民者到来后
With the arrival of European settlers,
人类和臭鼬之间达成了不稳定的休战
an uneasy truce was established tween man and skunk.
交换了礼物
Gifts were exchanged.
签署了条约
Treaties were struck...
然后又打破
and broken.
引发了纠纷
A feud ignited,
造成了臭鼬镇之战
resulting in the Battle of Skunktown.
臭鼬和人类都有伤亡
Skunk and man lost life.
臭鼬得到了血的教训
The skunks learned the hard way
你不能带肛腺去参加枪战
you can't bring an anal gland to a gunfight.
有人该把这话印在T恤上
Somebody should put that on a T-shirt.
我已经在搞了
I'm already on it.
那土地呢
So, yeah, about the land?
是的臭鼬镇在1970年
Yes. Skunktown was annexed
兼并到了狄普顿街843号♥
in 1970 to 843 Tipton Drive.
不那是我家地址
No! That's my address.
你在逗我吧
Aw, you got to be joking.
看样子我们要和臭鼬战斗了
Ugh. Looks like we've got some skunks to battle.
最好给你的肛腺做好准备韦恩
Better prep your anal glands, Wayne.
保佑哈特
第二季第十八集
好极了现在我得应付这些臭鼬
Great. Now I have to deal with these skunks,
更别说还要
not to mention the headache
移走我的边界轮胎
of having to move my property line tire.
要是那轮胎的形状
Yeah, if only that tire was in the shape of something
能更容易移♥动♥就好了
that would make it move easier.
韦恩赶走臭鼬在你的土地上
Wayne, get rid of the skunks and build something
修建点什么
on that land it turns out you own.
你可以修建一个迷你高尔夫球场
You could build a mini golf course.
或者一个户外密室逃脱
Or an outdoor escape room.
如果是户外的那人们不可以直接离开吗
If it's outdoors, could people just, I don't know, leave?
如果墙是镜子就不行
Not if the walls are mirrors.
一群疯子
Couple of loonies.
我们去微醉河庆祝吧
Let's celebrate with drinks at Tipsy River.
我不想去微醉河
Uh, I don't want to go to Tipsy River.
我不想在我外婆工作的时候打搅她
I don't want to bother my meemaw while she's working.
我们就别逼他了
Let's not push it.
他觉得他的乡下外婆很丢人
He's embarrassed of his country-ass grandma.
别为你外婆感到丢人韦恩她很逗
Don't be embarrassed of your meemaw, Wayne. She's fun.
他来了从我小妹妹
There he is. The son of the cutie
生出的美女的儿子
who shot out of my ha-hooey.
那是我外孙呼哈
It's my grandson, y'all. Hoot 'n' Haw!
大家一起跟我喊
Come on, everybody, say it with me.
-呼哈 -呼哈
- Hoot 'n' Haw! - Hoot 'n' Haw!
这是爱德华兹家的人打招呼的方式
That's what we Edwards do when we see each other.
是的外婆我们知道
Yes, Meemaw. We all know.
呼哈喊起来韦恩
Hoot 'n' Haw! Come on, Wayne.
呼哈
Hoot 'n' Haw!
呼哈
Hoot 'n' Haw.
吉米·李你的汉堡好了
Hey, y'all. Jimmy Lee, your burger's up.
你能去拿下吗我得跟我外孙聊聊
You mind getting it? I got to talk to my grandson.
你们有听说我和奈德分手了吗
So, did y'all hear me and Ned broke up?
老天
Yeah. Lord.
我发现那个饥渴老态龙钟的矮子
I caught that horny-ass, dried-up gnome
在搓他侄儿后姨的脚
rubbing his nephew's step-aunt's feet.
小声点外婆
Uh, keep it down, Meemaw.
收拾了行李带上汤米叔叔
Packed my things, took Uncle Tommy
离开了那里
and hauled ass out of there.
漂泊在外真的很难
It's a hell of a thing being adrift.
没有能称之为家的地方 -这太完美了外婆
- No place to call home. - Well, this is perfect, Meemaw,
因为韦恩刚发现他多了一块土地
'cause Wayne just discovered he got a whole other parcel of land.
不过幸运的是我不需要
But luckily, I'm good.
罗伯特·普兰特这周末要来大剧场
Yeah. Robert Plant's coming to the coliseum this weekend.
我们会跟他住
We're gonna crash with him.
等等是齐柏林飞艇的罗伯特·普兰特吗
Wait, like, Led Zeppelin's Robert Plant?
是的小维外婆以前是骨肉皮
Yeah, Vi. Meemaw used to be a groupie.
不是在他作为齐柏林飞艇成员期间
And not during his crap Led Zeppelin era.
而是在Honeydrippers乐队的时期
We're talking Honeydrippers.
相信我在午夜
And you can bet there's gonna be
会有"超棒的滚床单"
some "Good rockin' at midnight."
我们打败过你一次臭鼬
We beat you once, skunks.
我们会再次打败你饿们
We'll beat you again!
臭鼬镇的第二次战役
The Second Battle of Skunktown
比第一次还血腥
was threatening to be even bloodier than the first.
不韦恩我们寡不敌众
No! Wayne, we're being overrun!
太多屁了
I'm taking so many butt spurts.
我也是珍妮
Me, too. Oh! Jenny.
-珍妮 -在
- Jenny! - Yes?
我们要叫灭虫公♥司♥的人吗
Should we just call Exterminex?
好的
Yeah, let's do that.
我去他们真厉害
Damn, they are good.
看看你的土地韦恩太美了
Look at your land, Wayne. Oh, it's beautiful.
我好激动我想把这打造成
I'm so excited. I want to make it into something
一个能让你和贝蒂骄傲的地方
that'll make you and Betty proud.
不
Oh, no.
各位我们要搬进来了
Hey, y'all. We're moving in.
呼哈
Hoot 'n' Haw!
不不不外婆等等
No, no, no. Meemaw, wait.
你不是要跟罗伯特·普兰特住吗
What happened with Robert Plant?
他老婆发现我藏在商务中心
His wife found me hiding in the business center.
被抓到了然后我意识到
Yeah, busted. Then I realized
我可以停在韦恩的新土地上
I can park myself on Wayne's new land.
外婆不不行
Meemaw, no. No, no, no.
我们得叫她离开如果她卸下了行李
We got to get her out of here. If she unpacks,