美式主妇

American Housewife S05E11

Part 2 March 23, 2021, 10:39 a.m.

那里你会找到答案
That's where you'll find your answers.
这有点侵犯她们的隐私吧
That feels like an invasion of their privacy.
有别的东西像是在侵犯她们的隐私
Something else feels like an invasion of privacy.
是什么呢
What is it?
对了是你
Oh, yeah, you.
你最后会爱上我的
Oh, you're gonna end up loving me.
每次都这样
That's how it always is.
具体有谁最后爱上你了呢
Now, exactly who has ended up loving you?
暂时还没有人是暂时而已
No one yet. Yet!
把他们名字发给我我马上查查
Alright, send me their names. I'll get right on it.
要多久
How long is that gonna take?
好了我查到了
Mm-hmm. Alright, here's what I got.
领英说这位
According to LinkedIn, uh, this one,
小腹紧致平坦我可以当切菜板用的女性
whose belly I would use as a charcuterie board...
正在找工作
is looking for a job.
但这位她刚通过了我的好友申请
But this one, who, oh, just accepted my friend request
小可怜
p-poor thing.
她在费尔菲尔德的咖啡店工作
Ah, she works at a coffee shop over in Fairfield.
-搞定 -天你真厉害
- Boom. - Wow. You are amazing.
也有点吓人
Also a bit terrifying.
你的口气好像我所有前任
Aw, you sound like all my exes.
我们现在就去看看她
Let's go check her out now.
等等你意思是我们从第二顿早餐
Wait, you mean we're going from Second Breakfast
直落到第三顿早餐吗今天真是赛高啊
to third breakfast? This is the best day ever.
你好
Yeah, hi, hi.
我已经坐了五分钟了
I have been here almost five minutes,
你还没拿菜单给我
and you have not brought me a menu.
我可没点你这狗屁态度
Yeah. I didn't order the attitude.
她很漂亮友善
She's pretty, friendly,
而且似乎也没找错钱
and she seemed to give the exact change.
但我好像对她没什么认识
But I don't really feel like I have a sense of her.
她聪明吗运动神经发达吗
Is she smart? Is she athletic?
她的牙和牙龈比例是多少我可不想要大牙龈宝宝
What's her teeth-to-gum ratio? I don't want no big-gum baby.
我去观察她你在这等着
I'll go check her out. You hang back.
如果生育中心发现了你的所为
If somehow the fertility place finds out what you're doing,
绝对会拒绝你这个客户的
they will definitely drop you as a client.
你最好了
Oh, you're the best.
我要用你名字给宝宝命名
I'm naming this baby after you.
天呐真的吗
Oh, my God. Really?
其实让我再考虑一下
Actually, let me think about it.
或许就选个K开头的名字
Maybe just something with a "K."
我不能保证
Don't hold me to that.
我要三杯拿铁
Hi. I need three lattes --
一杯热的一杯冰的一杯温的
one hot, one iced, and one just warm.
热的加一份香草糖浆冰的加杏仁奶
Shot of vanilla in the hot one, almond milk in the iced one,
温的要半低咖♥啡♥因♥
and then the warm one is half-caf.
一杯热香草拿铁一杯冰杏仁奶拿铁
One hot vanilla latte, one iced almond milk latte,
还有一杯温半低咖♥啡♥因♥拿铁
and a half-caf latte, warm.
对吗
Is that right?
也许对吧
Uh, maybe.
记性不错
Quite the memory!
很聪明
Very smart.
我可以付硬币吗
Okay if I pay with coins?
手眼协调能力强运动神经发达
Good hand-eye. Athletic.
而且你很漂亮
And you're very pretty.
这多亏了我外婆
Aw. You can thank my grandmother for that.
你遗传了她的美貌
Oh, you got her genes.
不是继承了她的遗产
No, I got her money.
她死后我用她的钱去整容了
When she died, I used it to spruce myself up.
我做了丰唇隆鼻隆胸丰臀和瘦肚子
I did my lips, nose, boobs, butt, tummy.
连蹼足都矫正了
Even got my webbed feet taken care of.
终于能穿人字拖一定很爽吧
It must be nice to finally wear flip-flops.
是啊
Totally.
我知道外婆从天上看见我有朝一日
And I know Grandma will look down on me and smile
实现了上《单身汉》真人秀的梦想也会笑的
when I achieve my dream of getting on "The Bachelor."
抱歉你刚没通过
Sorry, you just failed a test
你不知道正在进行的测试
you didn't even know you were taking.
但我会看你在《单身汉》的精彩表现的
But I'll watch for you on "The Bachelor,"
然后是《天堂单身汉》《老大哥》
then "Bachelor in Paradise," Then "Big Brother,"
《道路规则》和《名人康复所》
then "Road Rules," Then "Celebrity Rehab."
谢啦
Thanks.
欢迎有什么能帮你的
Welcome. Can I help you?
我们爸爸要竞选市议员
Our dad is running for City Council.
我们能把他的竞选标牌
Would it be alright if we put his campaign sign
放在你店里吗
up in your store?
可以随便放哪都行
Sure, anywhere you want.
给我胶带
Hand me some tape.
如果你礼貌点没准我会给你
Throw a "please" on there, and I might.
麻烦你给我胶带
Please hand me some tape.
-不给 -快给我啦
- No. - Give me that.
不别对我指手画脚
No, don't tell me what to do!
你们太糟糕了
You two are terrible.
我没兴趣在店里摆那个牌子
I'm not interested in putting that sign up in my store
也没兴趣投票给教出这种没家教小孩的男人
or voting for a man who raised such awful children.
我没法争辩
Can't argue with that.
你在这啊
There you are!
该死格雷格
Ugh! Damn it, Greg.
我不是说过别偷偷在背后靠近我吗
I have told you about sneaking up on me.
所以我们才决定我不该有枪
This is why we decided I shouldn't have a gun.
抱歉我就是在找监护人这问题上卡住了
Sorry. I'm just kind of stuck on the guardian search.
那是你的领域
That is your area.
我知道但这事很重要
I've gathered that, but this is a big deal.
-也许我们一起的话... -我不想聊这个
- Maybe together -- - I don't want to talk about it.
但我问过所有人了在我看来...
Yeah, but I've gone through everyone, and the way I see it --
你似乎没弄明白我来跟你说清楚
You don't seem to be getting it, so let me make this clear.
别这样我需要你的意见
Come on. I could use your input.
这不是我的领域
Not my area!
你表现得很幼稚
You're acting like a child.
啦啦啦啦啦啦
La! La! La! La-la! La! La! La!
格雷格我不能被打断
Greg, I can't be interrupted.
我真的很想看完这一章
I really want to finish this chapter.
那是你的书保险箱用来放你的巧克力棒的
That's your book safe where you keep your Krackel bars.
我们得好好谈谈
We need to talk about this.
-我没法谈 -为什么
- I can't. - Why?
因为思考谁来当安娜凯特的监护人
Because thinking about who Anna-Kat will go to
意味着想象我的宝贝被其他人抚养大
means thinking about my baby being raised by someone else,
想到她的成长过程没有爸爸妈妈
about her growing up without a mom and dad.
这太痛苦了
It's too painful.
我也不开心
It upsets me, too,
但那不代表我们不用去处理
but that doesn't mean we don't have to deal with it.
你无视了那张60块的违停罚单
You ignored that $60 parking ticket.
-现在罚金滚成800块了 -该死
- Now it's like $800. - Oh, damn.
我真该去付钱了
I really should pay that.
迟点再去吧
Eh, I'll do it later.
在我看来我们唯一的选择是凯瑟琳
The way I see it, our only option is Kathryn.
卢瑟很聪明啊
Luthor's pretty smart.
坐下
Sit!
还是比我妈强
Still better than my mom.
我也不认为她是理想人选
I'm not thrilled about her either.
在我考虑签字前
Before I even think of signing off,
我们得先测试她
we're going to test her.
这主意很棒
That's a great idea.
谁知道呢没准她会给我们惊喜
Who knows? She might surprise us.
她的确很擅长给人惊吓
Oh, she's good at that.
高中那会儿我撞见她和我男朋友亲热
In high school, I walked in on her making out with my boyfriend.
我真是惊吓极了
I was very surprised.
要照顾孩子需要做到三件"育"结尾的事
Okay, to care for a child, you need the three N's.
必须对孩子进行养育培育和安全教育
You have to be able to nourish, nurture, and nicely protect.
最后一项是我编的为了全是"育"结尾
I fudged the last one to make them all N's.
我肚子有点饿
I'm getting kind of hungry.