参加格莱美

Girls, I have made a big decision.
姑娘们 我做了个重大决定
You're having a sex change?
你要做变性手术?
I totally support you, but be careful, Han.
Han 我举双手赞成 不过得小心点
Female to male is very tricky.
从女人变成男人很难的
Well, you would know.
哦 你做过当然知道了
Me ow!
哇塞!
He must have already started on the hormones.
手术还没做呢他就已经满身女性荷尔蒙了
Now, here's my big decision.
给你们瞧瞧偶滴重大决定
We're moving from those icky glass ketchup bottles
我要把粘糊糊的玻璃番茄酱瓶
to modern, new squeeze bottles.
换成摩登 崭新的塑料挤挤瓶
Wow, that is some fresh, outside the box thinking.
哇哦 真是推陈出新 打破常规啊
It's like being an intern at Apple during the summer of '76.
就好像76年在苹果公司做实习生一样新鲜(苹果1976年创立)
That's right. Call me "Han Jobs."
没错 叫我"Han Jobs"吧 (Han意指自己像乔布斯)
Oh, I will only call you "Han Jobs."
哦 你也只能叫"Han Jobs"(Han Jobs谐音hand jobs 讽Han只能打♥飞♥机 找不着女人)
I can't believe everybody else is gone,
为什么其他人都走了
and we're stuck here doing this.
我们却还得干这苦逼活
Eew, this has a really toxic plastic smell.
呃 一股有毒的塑料味
Give me that.
给我
Max, are you huffing a ketchup bottle?Max
为嘛要吸番茄酱瓶?
Mm hmm. I'm hoping it kills the brain cells
嗯啊 我想杀掉些脑细胞
that'll remember I'm stuck
好忘掉在周五晚上
doing ketchups on a friday night.
装番茄酱这种痛苦经历
Max, give it to me!Max
给我!
Whether you believe it or not, you're above that.
信不信由你 你没那么苦逼
And you know what? We're above this.
知道吗? 咱俩都没那么苦逼
Forget this. Let's go out.
别管这些了 咱们出去玩
I mean, I'm newly single, and you're not picky.
我刚恢复单身 而你要求又不高
True.
也是
I'm ready to let my hair down
我准备放松一把
and have one of those crazy
过一个疯狂而省钱的
yet fiscally responsible kind of nights.
狂欢之夜
You mean steal other girls' drinks
你是说趁其他女孩上厕所的时候
when they go to the bathroom?
把他她们的饮料偷走?
Seriously, what can you do in Williamsburg
说真的 手上连20块钱都不到
if you have less than $20?
去威廉斯堡能干啥?
Hang out on the sidewalk and look good till you turn 35.
在门口等着 直到等成半老徐娘
Then turn to your friends and say, "I have to move home."
然后对朋友说 "我得回家了"
Hey, you know what?
嘿 知道吗?
The Raveonettes are playing the Lorimer Lounge.
Raveonettes Lorimer Lounge(丹麦摇滚组合)要演唱
We got a little tip money and lot of deeds.
我们有点小费 身材又很不错
So let's just watch the magic unfold.
就让我们一起见证奇迹吧
I haven't seen the Raveonettes live
自从在丹麦见到Raveonettes之后
since I saw them in Denmark.
就再没看过他们现场表演了
That is crazy because I first heard of them
真的吗 我第一次听说他们的时侯
when I was dry humping a guy named Mark in his den,
是在一个叫Mark的破房子里和他跳贴身舞
So...twinsies!
瞧咱们这共同点!
Wow, my life has really changed.
哇哦 我的生活真是变了
The last time I was in an alley behind a club,
我上次出现在夜店后面的胡同
I was in an SUV with one of the Olsen twins.
是和其中一个奥尔森姐妹一起坐在越野车里
注释：Olsen twins 双胞胎电视明星
I still don't know which one.
但我到现在还不知道是跟哪个坐一起
Hey, speaking of the Olsen twins,
嘿 说到奥尔森姐妹
I once woke up next to a garden gnome.
有一次我醒来发现身边有个花园土地神
Well, so much for our plan.
我们的计划还没实行
Yes, we've still got "doze," but no tickets.
我们虽然有"D杯" 却拿不到门票
There's gotta be a way for us to get in.
总得有办法进去
What up, ladies?
嗨 姑娘们
Hi. Moo. Whatever.
嗨 "哞" 神马的
You need tickets?
需要门票吗?
Well, Bessie, we might be interested.
奶牛哥 我们很感兴趣
How much?
多少钱?
You can have 'em for free if the blonde one milks me.
要是这个金发小妞给我挤挤奶 就免费赠送
How bad do you want those tickets, Caroline?
Caroline? 你是有多想要这些票呢
Ha, not that bad.
哈 也不是很想要
Bye. Moo. Whatever.
拜 "哞" 神马的
Sorry, Max, but I can't come back
对不起Max 我可不想
from pulling a strange man's teats.
挤一个陌生男人的奶头
You think that, and then you do it, and it's not so bad.
既然已经想了 就动手做吧 没那么恶心的
Wow, New York without money is like no magic.
哇 在纽约没钱就没奇迹啊
There's magic all over the city with or without money.
不管有没有钱 这个城市到处都有奇迹
You just have to make your own.
只要你肯动手去创造
By drinking.
喝酒就可以了
Oh. Purse beer.
哦 包包里有啤酒
Sorry there's no purse nachos.
抱歉 包包里没辣玉米片
I ate them all.
我都吃光了
Best I can do is, uh,
我最多只能给你留点儿
the cheese dust down near the birth control.
奶酪渣 旁边还有个避孕套
Okay, this is ratchet.
太悲催了
We're just standing here like a couple of Beckys.
我们俩只能站在这里意淫了
Where's your magic now? Oh, you wanna see magic?
说好的奇迹呢? 哦 你想见证奇迹吗?
Abracadabra.
妈咪妈咪哄
Let me in, dumbos.
让我进去 蠢货
Abra ca damn dabra!
妈咪 妈 咪 哄!
You know, I don't know what that trash bin said to you,
我不知道那个垃圾桶对你说了些什么
but you make a cute couple.
不过你们挺配的
I think it'd be a shame to break up
分手太可惜了
before you got to see what your kids would look like.
你们的孩子一定很漂亮
Well, it's been a rough couple of years for us,
没办法 这几年我们过得太难了
What with me considering grad school
我想读研
and him being a trash can, but what can I say?
而他却是个垃圾桶 我能怎么办呀?
It's love. I understand.
谁让我们相爱呢 可以理解
Americans love their garbage.
美国人都爱垃圾
How else would you explain
不然怎么会有那么多人爱看
the Real Housewives of everything?"
真人主妇"呢(美国真人秀)?
You're welcome for Euro Disney, by the way.
顺便说一句 欢迎你来欧洲迪士尼
My name's Graham. I'm with the band.
我叫Graham 是乐队成员
Max. I'm with the blonde.Max
我是和金发妞一起来的
You two can come and hang backstage if you like.
你们愿意的话可以到后台来玩
Your boyfriend can stay outside and get trashed.
不过你的男朋友只能待在外面装垃圾了
Hey, ratchet ass becky, we're in.
嘿 意淫妹 我们可以进去了
Earl, I'm worried.Earl
我很担心
I haven't seen Max since she leftMax
昨晚和那男的走了之后
with that guy last night.
我就再没见到她
I've called her a million times. She picked up once,
我给她打无数次电话了 她接了一次
and she was either having sex or fighting a bear.
她要么在滚床单 要么在和熊搏斗
Don't you worry. Max can take care of herself.
别担心Max会照顾好自己的
I once saw her push a truck out of her way with her mind.
有一次我看见她用意念推走一辆挡道的卡车
Hey, everybody.
嗨 同志们
Hey. Pardon.
嗨 很抱歉
Pardon my appearance,
原谅我疏于打扮
but I was just in the park
我刚才在公园
running after the high school boys' track team.
跟高中男子田径队赛跑来着
I told her it was fine with me.
我跟她说 我不会介意的
I know she will never catch one of them.
我知道她追不上这些小青年的
Oh, says you.
哦 随你怎么说
I'm going to the prom with Brandon.
我要和Brandon一起去舞会喽
Yeah, if his...if his dad will lend him the car.
没错 只要...只要他爸肯把车借给他
Sophie, I always love when you wear that outfit.Sophie
我最爱看你穿这身衣服
It makes me wanna xana do you.
让我想占有你
Sup?
嗨
Pip pip and cheerio.
哼哼哈兮
Max, thank god. I was so worried.Max
谢天谢地 我都担心死了
Wait, why do you look extra pretty?
等等 你怎么变漂亮了呢?
Probably the new shades I didn't pay for,
也许是因为没花钱得来的墨镜吧
Or the hours of him going downton on my abbey.
又或者是他直捣我的"唐顿庄园"之时
Hold up. No spoilers.
等一下 别剧透行吗
I haven't started season three yet.
我还没开始看第三季呢
Earl, you watch that show?Earl
你也看那部剧吗?
Yes, I do.
那是当然
I enjoy any show where the help is white.
只要是白人当服务员的剧 我都爱看
So you slept with that guy?
所以你跟那家伙睡了?
Oh, I really slept with that guy.
噢 我可是和那家伙睡了全♥套哟
You go, girl.
有你的 爽翻了吧
Don't stop till you get enough!
你没爽够就绝不要停!
I'm surprised you spent the night.
我很惊讶你在外过夜
Don't you usually leave before they realize
你不通常都是趁他们发现钱被偷光之前
there's nothing in their wallet?
就先行溜之大吉的吗?
Last night you were complaining about no magic.
昨晚你总是抱怨这世界没有奇迹
Then I woke up this morning to a view of the park
但是我今天早上起床就看到了公园的风光
and hot cinnamon rolls.
还有香喷喷的肉桂卷
Now I'm back at the diner but full of cinnamon rolls.
我现在回到餐馆但是肚子里塞满了肉桂卷哦
Boom. Magic. Suck it, David Blaine.
这就是奇迹 承认吧 魔术大师
Well, at least you had fun. The only fun I had last night
至少你还挺爽的 我昨晚唯一的乐子
was when that cow dude passed out on his feet,
就那个奶牛男摔倒的时候
and I tipped him over.
是我绊了他一脚
So are you gonna see him again?
那你准备再去他那儿吗?
Sunday.
周日
And I realize you haven't heard these words
我知道在你破产之后
since you lost your money, but you're invited.
很久没听到这样的话了 但是你也被邀请了
So you're asking me to be the third wheel
你是叫我去跟你们搞3P吗
on a two night one night stand?
加入你们第二次的"一♥夜♥情"?
So I guess a private plane and two tickets
所以一架私人飞机 加上两张格莱美音乐奖的
to the Grammys in L.A. Won't do it for you either?
门票 也请不动大小♥姐你咯?
Cause, bitch, we're invited!
咱们可是被邀请去看了哟!
The Grammys? That's so exciting.
格莱美? 乖乖隆地咚
Oh, and my self esteem could really use
当别人误以为我是Taylor Swift时
being mistaken for Taylor Swift right now.
我顿时觉得自尊倍增呀
Which tells you how low my self esteem is.
这也说明我现在已经没啥节操了
The guy is sending a private plane for me.
他可是派了一架私人飞机给我哦
A private plane!
一架私人飞机
That's how good I am in bed.
这说明姐的床上功夫一流啊
We're going to the Grammys! What is all of the excitement?
我们就要去看格莱美啦! 什么事情那么兴奋
Han, we need the weekend off. We're going to the Grammys.Han
我们这周末要请假 我们要去看格莱美啦
The Grammys? On the real real?
格莱美? 你是指去现场看?
Do you think you'll meet 2 chainz?
你们能看到2 chainz吗?(美国著名嘻哈歌手)
That's my boi!
他可是我的最爱!
No, he can't be your boi, he's my boi.
不不不 他不是你的最爱 是我的最爱
2 chainz is the man. He sings my anthem.
2 chainz是真汉子 唱出我的心声
We represent the lollipop guild?
咱们这会儿成了矮子合唱团了?
I'm talking about his ode to big booty hos.
我说的是他那首翘屁♥股之歌
Birthday song is my song.
生日歌是我的饮歌
No, birthday song is my song.
不 生日歌是我的饮歌
Every morning in the shower I rap
我每天早晨洗澡的时候都在唱
all I want for my birthday is a big booty ho ##
我想要的生日礼物就是个翘屁♥股 嗬 #
Wow, that actually makes you look whiter.
哟 你唱这歌的时候显得人更白了
I'll give you the weekend off
我可以让你们周末请假
if you get him to sign my concert t shirt.
但是你们要给我弄到他的签名T裇
Well, we're never gonna meet him, but done.
好吧 虽然我们不可能遇到他 但是就这样说定了
All my dreams are coming true!
我的梦想都要实现!
This is so exciting.
真是太激动人心了
I am finally going a plane ride.
我终于能坐飞机了
Max, you've never been on a plane?Max
你还没坐过飞机吗?
I've never been on a plane.
我还从来没坐过飞机呢
Max, even snakes have been on a plane.Max
连蛇都坐过飞机啊
Good morning, madame. Welcome aboard.
早上好女士 欢迎登机
It's a lovely day for a flight, yes?
今天真是个适合飞行的好天气 不是吗?
I am Agnes, and if there is anything that you need at all,
我叫Agnes 如果你们有任何的需要
you can just let me know. Hmm?
尽管吩咐
Cool. Cool.
好的 好的
Please don't lag behind.
你别去丢脸了
I just got French bombed, and I have no idea what she said,
我刚刚简直被法语轰炸了 我连个字母都没听懂
but I think we should tip her.
但我觉得我们该给她小费
Oh, my god.
天啊
I can't believe...
真不敢相信...
I'm back on a private plane.
我还能再坐上私人飞机
Max, thank you so much for having sex with that stranger.Max
真感谢你和那陌生人上床
Aw, it was my pleasure.
不用客气 应该的
Literally.
我说真的
Welcome aboard, I am Agnes.
欢迎登机 我是Agnes
I can take those for you.
你们把行李给我就行了
Do you have luggage?
您有行李吗?
Oh.
哦
Agnes 我是Caroline 她是Max
谢谢你
噢 你们好
Oh, thank you. I'm not Angelina Jolie.
哦 谢谢你 我可不是Angelina Jolie
I get that a lot.
我经常被认错
You speak french very well.
你的法语说的真棒
这是一堆法语 实在不好意思编.. 故不译了
That's all I know.
我就知道这点法语
And every time you ice me out with her,
当你把我冷在一边 跟她聊得正欢时
that's what's coming your way.
我就会发出这种声音
Okay, so how does this work?
好吧 我们接下来该干什么
Do we need tickets? Where do I sit?
我们需要买票吗? 我该坐在哪儿?
Because I don't wanna embarrass myself
我可不想让自己难堪
in front of French Stewart.
坐在法国版的Stewart对面
Max, there are no seat assignments.Max
私人飞机是不排座位的
You can sit anywhere.
你可以想坐哪儿就坐哪儿
Oh, cool. Like a.a.
太棒了 跟自助似的
I love a g5.
我太喜欢G5私人飞机了
This reminds me so much of the plane we used to have.
这让我想起从前我们家也有一辆这样的
Wait, Max, this plane looks very familiar.
等等Max 这飞机听起来怎么这么眼熟
Max, this was my plane.
Max 这飞机以前是我的
Well, it's my plane now.
好吧 现在是我的飞机咯
Wait, if this was my plane... Which it isn't.
等等 如果这架是我的飞机的话... –要是不是呢
There'd be something I hid down here for emergency.
我肯定在这里藏了些应急用品
Money? Gold? Kettle corn?
是钱? 金块? 还是好吃的?
Yep. My channel lip gloss.
找到了 是我的香奈儿口红
Abra ca damn dabra.
麻哩麻哩哄
You were a billionaire,
你是个亿万富翁
and for an emergency, you hid lip gloss?
你就藏个口红来应急?
Just in case something went wrong.
这是为了防止意外情况呀
I wanted to look good if I was going down.
万一迫降了 我也能美美地下飞机
You know they don't care what you look like
你知道当你低下身子给别人干那档子事时
as long as you go down.
别人才不会关心你长啥样
What the hell is wrong with me?
我到底是怎么了?
I'm glossing like a rich gal.
我涂的口红可是高级货
This has gotta last me two years.
这东西我得用上两年才行
Would you like a towel?
需要热毛巾吗
How much?
多少钱一条?
Max, they're free.
Max 毛巾是免♥费的
Oh, like the doughnuts at A.A.
就像免♥费的甜甜圈
Jeez, that's hot!
烫死姐了!
You should warn a bitch.
也不提醒下啊 贱♥人
So sorry. It's her first time on a plane.
抱歉 这是她第一次坐飞机
请不要介意 对了 请给我们端两杯香槟吧
你真是有范儿 我这就去给你们端香槟
Every time.
每次我都这样
We only are waiting for one more passenger,
我们只需再等一位乘客
and then we'll be departing.
便能起飞了
Champagne?
香槟?
Merci beaucoup.
谢谢你
Ooh, the last time I had champagne
上次我喝香槟酒的时候
was at a Filipino wedding I crashed at a DoubleTree.
还是混入DoubleTree酒店时 在一场菲律宾婚礼上
Another passenger? I wonder who it could be.
另一位乘客? 会是谁呀
Probably my mother.
可能是我妈
Every time something great is about to happen to me,
每次我有什么好事要发生
she shows up and ruins it.
她出现 就会把一切都毁了
In 20 hours, we went from beer in an alley
20个小时前 我们还在小巷子里喝啤酒
to DOM on a plane.
而现在却在飞机上喝着香槟
That's pretty magical.
还挺神奇的
Yeah, this could not get any better.
是呀 没什么会更美好了
Max, it did just get better.Max
还真会更美好
That's 2 Chainz. I can't believe it.
那是2 Chainz 真是不敢相信啊
Good morning. How y'all doing?
早上好 还好吗?
Cool. Cool.
挺好 挺好
All right.
好的
Monsieur Deux Chainz, good morning.2 Chainz
先生 早上好
Coffee, water, champagne?
咖啡 茶水 还是香槟?
No, I'm really tired. I just wanna crash.
不用 我很累 想睡一会(也有"坠落"之意)
Not the plane.
我不是说飞机
Do you have any sleepy time tea?
有没有宁神茶?
sleepy time tea"?"
宁神茶"?
That is so gangster!
太爷们了!
Oh, we're moving.
哦 开动了
Max, buckle your seat belt. We're about to take off.Max
系上你的安全带 我们就要起飞了
I'm a little scared.
我有点害怕
What's it gonna feel like?
会是什么感觉呢?
Oh, that's it? That feels familiar.
就这样? 似曾相识啊
Guess I have a private plane in my nightstand.
看来我床头也有个"私人飞机"
I can't believe this.
不敢相信
I'm standing in a flying living room eating ham.
我在空中阁楼吃着火腿
That's prosciutto from Italy.
那是来自意大利的熏火腿
It's ham from right over there.
这是火腿 来自那边
And I'm about to go ham on this ham.
我要吃翻这些火腿
It's been two hours.
已经2个小时了
When is 2 Chainz gonna wake up? I want a picture.
2 Chainz什么时候会醒啊? 我想拍张照
You want him to wake up for a picture?
你想等他醒了拍照?
I'll handle that.
看姐的
Anything?
有反应不?
Nothing. Do it again.
还没 再来一次
Wow, that sleepy time really knocks you out.
哇 那宁神茶真是让他睡翻呀
He must have two bagged it.
他肯定泡了两包
He's totally out. Let's just do it.
他都睡死过去了 我们直接拍吧
Wait, we're just gonna take his picture,
等等 我们只拍照
nothing else, right? Yes.
不干别的 对吧? 对啊
Okay, 'cause I can see how these things
好 因为我担心
can get out of hand.
我们会一发不可收拾
Okay, I'm first. No, no, no, I'm first.
好吧 我先来 不不不 我先来
It's my plane. Well, actually it's my plane.
这是我的飞机 其实是我的飞机
Was your plane. It's mine now.
以前是你的飞机 现在已经是我的了
I had morning sex for it with a leg cramp.
我为了它 早上可是嘿咻到腿抽筋了
Wait, do another, do another.
再来一张 再来一张
Good one.
这张不错
New facebook default.
脸书新头像
In fact, this is my new default pic for everything
我所有的头像都要换成这张
including my tombstone.
墓碑也这张
Since you did boobs, I'm gonna put my booty in his face,
你都放胸部了 我就放屁♥股到他脸上
cause all he wants for his birthday is a big booty ho.
因为他的生日愿望就是要个大屁♥股哟
Closer. I can't get both of you.
近一点 拍不进去
Get closer.
再近点
I never get tired of waking up like this.
要是每次都这么醒来就好了
Oh, Mr. Chainz, I am so mortified.Chainz
先生 我太羞愧了
I didn't wanna bother you. I was just gonna be cool.
我没想吵醒你 只是开个玩笑
Oh, that ship sailed with the butt pic
先给人家一屁♥股
and then crashed with "Mr. Chainz."
然后尊称"Chainz先生"
I just wanted a picture because I am such a huge fan.
我只是想拍个照 因为我是你的忠实粉丝
And I wanted to wish you luck tonight at the Grammys
我希望今晚你能拿到格莱美大奖
because your music means a lot to me.
因为你的音乐对我来说意义重大
And I totally related when you said
而且听到这些歌词我非常有共鸣
When I die bury me inside the Gucci store ##
当我死了 把我埋在Gucci店 #
True. # When I die #
对 # 当我死了 #
bury me inside the Louis store ##
把我埋在LV店 #
Unh. # All I want for my birthday #
额哦 # 我所有的生日愿望 #
is a big booty ho ##
就是要个翘屁♥股哟 #
All I want for my birthday is a big booty ho ##
我所有的生日愿望 就要个翘屁♥股哟 #
Yeah.
赞
Hey, what's the party, players?
嘿 歌手们 派对可好?
I heard "booty" and I heard "ho",
我听到了"屁♥股"和"哟"
so I had to do a pop in.
就想进来看看
Always some weird white guy coming to crash a party.
总是有奇怪的白人闯进来破坏派对
Chainz.
Chainz
Stop. No way.
好 不可能
I can't believe it's you flying this plane.
我不敢相信是你在开飞机
Caroline, it's been so long since I've seen you.Caroline
好久不见
Bring it in. Oh, Max, this is Bill.
抱一个Max 这是Bill
The pilot. The pilot?
我们的飞行员 飞行员?
Why is he walking around?
那他怎么走出来了?
Brace for crash! Brace for crash!
小心坠机! 小心坠机!
It's okay, it's on autopilot.
没事 现在是自动驾驶
Autopilot. That's how I live my life.
自动驾驶啊 我就是这么过的日子
Pilot Bill is an old pal.
飞行员Bill是老朋友了
He used to fly my friends and I around in college.
他曾经载着我和朋友在大学转悠
Yeah, good times.
是呀 美好的回忆
This is my friend, Max,
Max 这是我的朋友
and it's her very first time on an airplane.
她第一次坐飞机
Hey, mine too.
好巧 我也是
J.K.
开玩笑
Listen, Max, why don't you take a stroll down thereMax
你要不要去那边逛逛
and check out the cockpit?
试试驾驶座?
The cockpit?
驾驶座?
If it's anything like the gay bar
如果那里像是14号大街上同志吧
on 14th street, I'm not dressed right.
我这么穿可不大适宜哦
It is so good to see you.
能见到你太棒了
And, God, I'd forgotten how beautiful you are.
天哪 我都忘了你长得这么漂亮
Oh, thank you, pilot Bill.
Bill 嘴真甜 飞行员
You know, I never thought I had a chance with you before
知道不 我从没想过有机会能跟你一起
because you had so much money and I was 20 years older,
因为你是白富美 而且我还大你20岁
but now you're broke and I had a facelift,
但你现在破产 而我去做了脸部拉皮
so we're kinda on the same level.
所以咱们现在貌似水平相当了
Oh, a facelift?
脸部拉皮?
That's why your face is so tight and pink?
怪不得你的脸这么粉红紧绷
I thought maybe you were in a fire.
我还以为你是欲♥火焚身呢
But you look good.
但你看起来不错
Sure, let's go out. Great.
可以啊 我们约会吧 太棒了
I'm gonna grab a coffee.
我去拿个咖啡
I'll be right back.
马上就回来
What you doing going out with a guy like that?
你干嘛跟那种人约会?
Well, here's the thing,
原因是这样的
You don't tell the pilot flying the plane you're on
你绝对不能在坐飞机时
That you don't wanna go out with him.
拒绝飞行员的邀约
Got you.
懂了
You just keep flirting with him until we land.
在着陆前 你要继续勾搭他
I gotta make it to the Grammys.
我一定得出席格莱美
So, Max, you've really never been on a plane before?
Max你之前真的没坐过飞机?
Well, technically it's my second time
嗯 硬要说的算的话 这是第二次
If you count rock o plane ride at the carnival.
如果在游乐场的摇摇飞机也算
Guess I was rockin' that plane too hard,
估计那飞机被我摇惨了
Cause halfway through the ride,
玩到一半的时候
My mini 747 fell off its gears, and I crashed to the ground.
那架迷你飞机从掉了下来 我坠机了
There would have been a lawsuit,
本来是要打官司的
But the carnie paid me off with a snow cone,
但是游乐园只请我吃冰沙了事
And also no one cared about me as a child.
而且我小时候 爹不疼娘不爱的
Well, go ahead, put your hands on the wheel.
嗯 来吧 去抓方向盘吧
Give it a spin. No, I'm good.
转一转 免了 这样就好
Wow, we are really up there.
哇 我们飞的真高啊
I have never been this high.
我从未飞得这么高
And trust me, I have been high.
但是相信我 我绝对嗨过
Yeah, I hear that.
对 我听到了
No one liked to get high more than me.
我比谁都爱嗨
I did everything... Pills, weed, coke,
什么都玩过... 摇♥头♥丸 大♥麻 可卡因
And what's that called when you crumble the coke on your weed?
还有那种吧可卡因卷在大麻里的 那种叫什么?
Anyway, I loved to get high.
反正 我喜欢嗑药
But that's all way behind me now.
但是我已经改邪归正了
I've been clean and sober
一身轻松 神志清醒
Ever since that Denzel flight movie came out.
自从丹泽尔的飞行片上映后 我就改过了
It's still in the theaters.
这电影还没下映吗
Yep, saw it last week.
对啊 我上礼拜看的
Maybe I will put my hands on the wheel.
我觉得我还是抓紧方向盘吧
You know, just in case.
你知道的 以防万一嘛
It's the carnival ride all over again!
游乐场的悲剧重演了!
I broke the plane! I broke the plane!
我把飞机搞坏了! 飞机被我玩坏了!
Okay, everything's under control.
安啦 一切都在控制之中
Just sit down, sit down. Put your seat belt on.
坐下就好 坐下 系上安全带
And, uh, Caroline, here's my cellular.
Caroline 这是我的号码
嗯
Of course, you can always still get me at my mom's, so...
当然啦 你也可以去我妈妈那儿找我 所以...
Go save the plane!
快去救场
Yeah. Yeah.
好啦 好啦
We'll be fine.
没事拉
I was not meant to die as the second banana
我才不要成为那种在异地约炮之时
in a cross country booty call.
死掉的丑角
What did she say?
她说的什么?
I have no idea.
完全听不懂
I heard "love" and "why now?" so just in case.
我听到"爱"还有"为什么是现在?" 做好最
I should tell you I took $10 out of the cupcake fund
我该告诉你 我从创业基金里拿过十块钱
For a big mac and never told you.
去买巨无霸 还瞒着你
I should tell you I took $100 out of the cupcake fund
我也告诉你 我也拿过100块
To keep my hair this naturally blonde.
为了让我头发金得自然
Okay, everybody. We got a bit of a situation.
好了 各位 这里出了点情况
Looks like my new girlfriend's friend broke the plane.
看起来 我新女友的朋友搞坏了飞机
No, I'm just kidding. We had some engine trouble.
没有啦 我开玩笑的 引擎出了点问题
We're going to have to make an emergency landing in Kansas.
所以我们要在迫降在肯萨斯
Go, chiefs!
上啊 机长!
Hey, blondie.
嘿 金发妞
Why don't you keep us in the air?
你得让我们继续在天上飞啊
How about you go give the pilot a little love?
去给飞行员点爱的力量如何?
Okay.
好了
Okay, thank you.
好的 谢谢你
Well, good news.
好消息是
We're not stranded here.
我们还能脱身
I just got off the phone,
我刚接到的电话
and according to my new boyfriend, captain facelift,
我的新男朋友 拉皮机长告诉我
Your new boyfriend, the Brit, is flying us home tomorrow
你的新男朋友明天送我们回家
on a commercial flight. Coach.
不过是经济舱 坐沙发
What?
什么?
I don't do coach.
沙发我可不能屈就
And I am pretty positive 2 chainz would have taken us
而且我相当确定 我们迫降在玉米地的时候
On that other plane they sent if you hadn't rapped for 30 minutes
要不是你唱了30分钟的饶舌
In that corn field after we landed.2 chainz
会带我们上另一架私人飞机
I don't care what you say.
你爱怎么说都行
I burned that corn field up.
整片玉米地都被我的歌声燃烧了
Here, let's eat something.
来 我们吃点东西
They delivered the food.
他们送吃的来了
Slim jims, cheez its, pizza pringles,
瘦不拉叽的火腿 奶酪 披萨味的品客薯片
and two ham and cheese sandwiches.
还有两根香肠 和起司三明治
Ham? Where's the prosciutto?
吃火腿? 意大利火腿哪里去了?
There is none.
没有了
Mais pourquoi?
真滴木有鸟?
Because we're at a motel in Kansas.
这里是肯萨斯的小破旅馆啊
And the lady at the front desk called me a snob
那个女前台还骂我抠门鬼
For ordering the pizza pringles.
因为点了品客薯片
I can't believe I'm not at the Grammys,
难以置信 我没去成格莱美
And I'm stuck here eating a lousy vending machine sandwich.
还在这里嚼着自动售卖机买来的恶心三明治
Well, it's better than doing those ketchups in the diner.
好啦 总比在餐馆摆弄番茄酱好多了
And crash landing in a corn field with a rap star
我们和个饶舌歌手迫降在玉米地里
with our heads still attached... That's pretty magical, right?
而且咱们还没掉脑袋 这已经是奇迹了 对吧
Yeah, and 2 chainz did say
对啊 而且2 chainz确实说了
he enjoyed meeting us and that we're two fine, big booty hos.
很高兴认识咱们 并赞咱俩的屁♥股很翘哟
That's pretty magical.
真是相当神奇
Han's gonna be so jealous when he finds out
Han 要是知道我们遇见2 chainz
I met our boy.
一定会嫉妒死的
Oh, my god, we forgot to get Han's t shirt signed.
Han要签名了
哦 老天 我们忘了帮
Or did we?
是咩?
When you don't have enough money to fix your own mistakes,
要是没有钱去亡羊补牢
You've gotta make your own magic.
你就得使出自己的魔法
Max, it's 2 chainz with a "z" not an "s."
Max 2 chainz的最后一个字母是"Z"不是"S"
Damn! The one time I know how to spell something,
妈的! 唯一会的一个词 还让我拼错
And it comes back to bite me in the ass.
真的是书到用时方恨少
Ooh, it's starting.
哦 开始了
Ready to go to the Grammys?
准备开始看格莱美了没?
Don't get any Ham on the dress.
衣服不要碰到火腿
We have to return these to get our money back.
衣服还要拿去退钱的
You think beyonce's saying that right now?
你觉得碧昂西会说这种丧气话嘛?
Hey, if we can make our own magic,
嘿 既然咱们也能变魔术
We can make our own Grammys. The Grammys...
咱们就给自己变场格莱美吧 格莱美现场...
Max black, who are you wearing?Max black
你穿的是什么?
Who are you wearing? My roommate's rent.
哪个大师的作品? 是我舍友的房租
You're right, this is pretty magical.
对啦 这真的挺神的
But wait, I think it can get better.
等下 更棒的还没来呢
See?
看到没?
Way more magical.
太神了
You know, this kind of feels like the private plane.
这震动地像是在坐私人飞机
Yeah, the one I have in my nightstand.
我床头柜里那东西震动起来也这样