招聘实习生

Hey, I'm gonna go to the bathroom real quick.
我要去一趟洗手间 很快回来
I want to look in the mirror
我想去照照镜子
and make sure I'm still dead in the eyes.
确认下我的眼神依旧死气沉沉
You think you can handle my section?
你觉得你能应付好我这区吗
Uh, yeah, I think I can handle it.
当然 我觉得我完全应付得过来
Hey, Earl, I don't know if you noticed,
厄尔 不知道你有没有注意到
but I'm running the whole diner right now.
但现在整间餐厅都归我管耶
What, what?
厉害吧
The customer at table ten appears to be choking,
十号桌的客人好像噎着了
And I would help,
我想去帮忙
but the last time I gave a white woman the heimlich,
但我上次对一个白人女性实施海姆利克法
注释：海姆利克法 是一种使堵住喉咙的异物被吐出的急救方法
I did six months in the Birmingham city jail.
被抓进伯明翰的监狱关了六个月呢
Oh, my God, are you choking?
天啊 您是噎着了吗
Oh, my god, I feel like you're choking!
天啊 我感觉您像是噎着了
Is anyone here a doctor?
这里有人是医生吗
What am I saying? I forgot where I am.
我在胡说什么 这里哪会有医生来
Has anyone here ever seen Scrubs?
这里有人看过《实习医生风云》吗
注释：《实习医生风云》 美国医疗喜剧
What do you do when a girl is choking?
当有姑娘噎着时该怎么做啊
I just back up a few inches.
我会从她嘴里"拔♥出♥来"一点
What do we do?
我们该怎么办
What do we do? This woman is choking!
怎么办啊 这个女人被噎着了
Thank you so much.
非常感谢
You're welcome.
不用客气
And feel free to tip me what you think your life's worth.
你觉得自己的命值多少 就给多少小费吧
I feel 3 bucks coming my way.
感觉要有三块钱入袋啦
Here you go, guys. I'm the only waitress.
上菜啦 各位 这家店就我一个服务员
Sorry you waited longer for the burger
您等这汉堡的时间
than you did for that Cosby sweater to come back.
比科斯比毛衣再流行还久 真对不住
注释：比科斯比毛衣，得名于喜剧演员比尔·科斯比 是上世纪90年代初流行的一种颜色丰富图案复杂的毛衣
Max, look at my face. I'm very upset.
麦克斯 看我的表情 我非常不爽
Is that what that means? I just assumed you were constipated.
原来是不爽啊 我还以为你是一脸便秘相呢
Caroline is late again.
卡洛琳又迟到了
And she better not use your new cupcake shop as an excuse this time,
她最好别再拿你们新蛋糕店当借口
cause sister, that crap ain't gonna fly.
因为妹子 老娘才不信那屁话呢'
First of all,
首先
stop talking like you're in a Tyler Perry movie.
请不要学黑人疯婆子电影里的语气说话
注释：泰勒·派瑞 好莱坞黑人导演 其主要作品有《疯女人日记》和其续集《玛蒂的家人重
逢》
And secondly,
其次
Caroline's here; she's in the kitchen.
卡洛琳在呢 她在厨房啊
Oh, really? 'cause when I was in there,
是吗 刚才我在厨房
you told me she was out here.
你跟我说她在外面
You play me, fool.
你耍老娘啊
Stop talking like you're in a Tyler Perry Sequel.
请别学黑人疯婆子电影续集里的语气说话
And secondly I'll ask Earl.
其次... 我问厄尔好了
Earl...
厄尔
Ow!
哎哟喂
What happened? Why did you scream?
怎么了 你干嘛尖叫
I accidentally sat on one of my boys!
我刚不小心坐到我的"蛋"了
Have you seen Caroline tonight?
你今晚有见过卡洛琳吗
Of course I have, man.
当然有啦 兄弟
I just saw her go down the hall to the ladies room.
我刚看见她走到那头去洗手间了
There. Happy?
瞧 开心了吧
You've solved the big mystery, Shortlock Holmes.
你破解了大谜题 小洛克·福尔小厮
Wait, she didn't pick up any of her
慢着 她没有端任何她的...
Caroline?
卡洛琳
Can't talk now, Han.
没功夫搭理你 阿憨
And how many more times do I have to ask you
我得跟你说多少遍 你才愿意
to fix this damn pie carousel?
修好这个放派的转盘啊
I mean, the temp just isn't cool enough,
温度一点都不够凉
and those tapiocas are gonna turn bad.
西米露很容易会变质
If you do want a lawsuit, just keep ignoring me.
如果你想吃官司 就继续忽视我的话吧
Max, can I see you in the kitchen
麦克斯 能进我几分钟前
where I was just a couple minutes ago
就待过的厨房说说话吗
after I got out of the ladies room?
虽然我后来去上了个厕所
Yeah, get on that temperature thing.
对啊 赶紧弄那玩意的温度
There's so much mold growing in there
里面霉菌那个多呀
that cherry pie's gonna need a pap smear.
樱桃派都得来个子♥宫颈抹片检查了
That was some ballsy, bold,
刚才还真是有种够胆
in your face awesome lying.
牛逼哄哄的扯谎呀
I learned it by watching you, dad.
虎父无犬子嘛 父亲大人
Had to lie. We need every minute
不撒谎不行 为了蛋糕店
we can steal away from here to get the cupcake shop ready.
我们得尽可能偷时间 能偷多少是多少
We still have to do the second coat of paint,
我们还得再刷一遍漆
figure out tables and chairs...
搞定桌椅...
What? Didn't have time for lunch.
看什么 我没时间吃午饭
Oh, I don't care.
我又不在乎
I'm surprised you're using a spoon.
我只是惊讶你居然还用勺子
I just stick my face in it.
我通常直接把脸埋进去吃
So, my brilliant idea of how we get this all done
我有个能把这一切搞定的绝妙主意
is we should get an intern to help.
就是招个实习生来帮忙
What? No.
什么 不行
I can't be a person that has an intern.
我当不了用实习生的老板
I can barely be a person that doesn't have an intern.
我连当个没实习生跟班的老板都很勉强了
Max, all businesses use interns.
麦克斯 所有企业都用实习生啊
We just have to post an ad online
只需在纽约大学或哥伦比亚大学的网上
at NYU or Columbia,
发个招聘广告
And we'll have 20 applicants battling it out
就能收到雪片般飞来
to do our grunt work for credit.
争先恐后求这苦差事的申请
You make it sound like The Hunger Games: college edition.
被你说得像是《饥饿游戏之大学版》
注释：《饥饿游戏》 少男少女弱肉强食 互相残杀求生存的电影
Sorry, I'm against getting people to work for free.
抱歉 我反对不给钱让人干白活
I'm with you, Max.
我同意 麦克斯
My people were interns for 436 years.
我们黑人免♥费"实习"了436年呢[黑奴]
I am just getting used to the idea of having my own business
我才刚习惯拥有自己的小生意这个念头
and now you want me to be someone's boss?
现在你就要我当别人的老板啊
I am not the boss.
我不是当老板的料
I'm the person who talks behind the boss's back.
我是那种在老板背后说他坏话的人
Pick up.
上菜
Thanks. Isn't han a tool?
谢了 阿憨是个傻♥逼吧
Total tool. Yeah, a tiny tool.
纯傻♥逼 一个小傻♥逼[工具]
Like the kind you fix your eyeglasses with.
就像拿来修眼镜的小工具一样
See?
看见了吗
That's my wheelhouse.
那才是我擅长的事
Look, I don't want to ask someone to work for free.
我不想让人来免♥费帮咱们工作
We can do it all ourselves.
我们可以自己做啊
You want to do it all yourself? Great.
你想一切都自己搞定吗 没问题
I'll write everything you need to do on a to do list.
我会列个待办清单 你得去办好一切
Why don't you to do that?
为什么你不"去办"呢
And I will to tear it up.
然后我"去把它撕成碎片"
What're we tearing up?
我们要把什么撕碎
cause if it's that ass, I already got that covered.
如果是卡洛琳的翘臀 那我已经搞定了'
Hi, Andy. That's so sweet and dirty.
安迪 那番话真是又甜蜜又下流
Easy, easy. What are you, shipping off to war?
要这么激♥情吗 你又不是要被送去打仗
Here. Take this giant bag of skittles
来 这大包彩虹糖给你
and look the other way. I'm not that easy.
别插手这事 老娘可没这么好哄
Ooh, new mystery flavors?
哇 新的神秘口味
We getting together after you get off work?
下班后再见对吧
It'll be really late.
今天会非常晚
Max and I still have to go to the cupcake shop
我和麦克斯还得去小蛋糕店
and tape up the windows so we can start the trim tomorrow.
用胶带把窗户粘上 这样明天好开工装修
Okay, I'm not very good at painting,
好吧 虽然我不擅长刷漆
but I can do this while you paint.
但你刷漆时 我可以在一边做这个
Yeah.
对
Yeah, roll that paint on that wall.
就这样 把油漆刷到墙上
You are so freaking cute.
你真是可爱到爆
Ugh, white people.
白人果然都是白♥痴
Look, why don't you guys just get an intern?
你们何不找个实习生呢
That's what I did when I opened my shop.
我当初开店的时候也是这么做
You two are like evil warlords
你们俩简直就是魔鬼军阀
mining the souls of innocent zombies.
开采着无辜丧尸的灵魂
Oh, and keep your eyes peeled at your store.
对了 要注意看看你的店
The janitor told me he saw some rat droppings.
门卫说他发现里面有老鼠屎
But all you gotta do is set up some traps.
不过你们只需弄几个扑鼠器就行了
Oh, gross. Who's gonna do that?
真恶心 谁来干这活啊
The intern?
实习生吗
So, Ruth, you are a sophomore at NYU, majoring in finance?
露丝 纽约大学大二生 主修金融是吗
You know you're not gonna get paid.
你知道是无偿干白活吧
No money at all.
一分钱都没有哦
Yup, it's in internship.
对啊 实习就是这样啊
I mean, it's all good, right?
我是说 没关系的 对吧
It's all good until you need money.
直到你需要钱就有关系了
Well, we're a startup company,
我们是家刚起步的公司
and we're launching our very first retail store,
刚开设我们头一家零售店
so there's a lot of details that you'll be responsible for.
所以你需要负责很多小事
There's a lot of carrying things,
很多搬运工的事
maybe some trapping things.
可能还有些捕猎的事情哦
Oh, it's cool. I have a car.
没关系 我有车
You have a car and you want to be an intern?
你是有车一族 居然还想当实习生
How 'bout if we switch places?
不然咱俩换一换
I'll be the intern with the car,
我来当有车的实习生
and you can sit on a broken folding chair
你来坐这张烂的折叠椅
next to Donna Trump over here.
坐在女版唐纳德·川普[大亨]的旁边
Well, Max and I need to have a little meeting right now,
我和麦克斯现在得开个小会
so if you could go over to the waiting room, that'd be great.
你最好去那边的等候区稍等一会
Okay, Ruth?
可以吗 露丝[同情心]
I just wanna say I know my name is weird,
我想说我知道我的名字很奇怪
but like it's too late, right?
但现在改名太晚了 对吧
Max, why are you trying to convince her
麦克斯 你干嘛试图说服她
to not be our intern?
不要当我们的实习生啊
Why are you not saying,
你又干嘛不告诉她
You may get rabies and bubonic plague from our rats?
你可能因老鼠而染上狂犬病和黑死病啊
Don't mention the rats.
别提老鼠
You're chasing them away.
你会吓跑人家
And we do not have rats. We have rat droppings.
而且我们这里只有老鼠屎 没有老鼠
Let's not jump to conclusions.
别过早下结论
You're right, the rats are probably
你说得对 老鼠可能只是
just coming in here to use the bathroom.
来这里借个厕所而已
Look, we need an intern.
我们需要一名实习生
Now, who do you like so far?
目前为止 你最喜欢哪一个
The one with the big boobs.
大咪♥咪的那个
I knew it. All you big boob people stick together.
我就知道 你们大咪♥咪星人都相互帮助
Hi, girls.
姑娘们
Are you having a beauty contest and didn't invite me
你们是在举行选美比赛吗 没邀请我
to give the other girls a chance?
是为了给其他姑娘一个机会吧
We're interviewing people to be our intern.
我们是在面试实习生
Who doesn't get paid.
没钱拿哦
Well, this is for you.
这是给你们的
You didn't have to do that.
真的不必了
You already gave us the money for the shop.
你都给我们开店的钱了
I know, I'm too wonderful.
我知道 我就是人太好了
But it's for good luck,
但这是求好运的
and sounds like you're gonna need it.
而且你们可能会很需要好运
Oleg says that it's rat central station around here.
奥列格说这一带是老鼠的中央车站
Not rats, Sophie, just rat droppings.
没老鼠 苏菲 不过是几颗老鼠屎而已
Oh, just rat droppings.
几颗老鼠屎啊
Oh, okay, no problem there.
好吧 那就没问题了
Are you out of breath
你上气不接下气
because you jogged here all the way from 1974?
是因为你是从1974年跑过来的吗
Sexy, huh?
很性感吧
You should see his badunkadunk when he jogs.
你们真应该看看他慢跑时的小翘臀
Well, here they are. 60 rat traps.
东西给你拿来了 60个扑鼠器
Girls...
姑娘们
I don't want to interfere with your business,
我不想插手你们的生意
but what the hell is goin' on here?
但这到底是怎么回事
There's no fancy tables or pretty chairs.
这里没有好看的桌子 也没有漂亮的椅子
I mean, this place is so unappealing,
这里毫无吸引力
even I don't look good here.
连我都不艳惊四座了
No worries.
别担心
We have some adorable old school ice cream tables and chairs
我们有些老派冰淇淋店的可爱桌椅
on hold at a kooky, fun staten island junkyard.
暂放在斯塔顿岛一个古怪有趣的垃圾场里
I can't believe you didn't just shoot a blood clot
真不敢相信你居然面不改色地
trying to make dump furniture sound cute.
把垃圾堆家具形容得这么可爱
Okay, girls, well, call me when you have a real business.
好吧 姑娘们 等你们正式开门再打给我
Yeah, and I'm I'm gonna take this,
对了 我要把这个带走
you know, so that the rats don't poop in it.
以防老鼠在里面拉屎
Come on, badunkadunk.
走吧 小翘臀
Oh, and, uh, Max...
对了 麦克斯
Oh, she's good. Yes.
她不错 真的
I knew it. All you big boob people stick together.
我就知道 你们大咪♥咪星人都相互帮助
Well?
好了
Here we are.
终于到了这一刻
The final three.
就剩最后三人了
Well, you know the one I like. I'll give you a clue.
你知道我喜欢哪个 我给你个提示
One, two.
左第一 右第二
Standing in front of me I see two beautiful,
站在我面前的是两位美丽
qualified young women.
条件良好的年轻女性
Is she really going all Top Model right now?
她现在是要学《全美超模大赛》那套吗
If only. They pay.
是就好了 人家是给钱的
I'm out, Tyra.
我退出 泰拉[超模主持人]
Ruth, congratulations.
露丝 恭喜你
You've been selected to be our intern.
你被选为我们的实习生
Max, will you get Ruth started on something?
麦克斯 你能让露丝开始干活吗
Yup, I got the internship.
对 我得到实习的机会了
You know what? I got it.
这样吧 我来弄
It's not like you're getting paid.
又没花钱请你
Big boob people are so much easier.
大咪♥咪星人肯定更好说话
As a kid, people told you
你小时候 是不是
everything you did was amazing, didn't they?
做什么屁事大家都称赞你啊
I was given a lot of positive reinforcement.
那是通过赞赏来强化我的积极度
I think it gave me the confidence
我觉得这也是我去年
that's gotten me through this last year.
有信心撑过难关的原因
Well, it's time you heard the truth.
是时候告诉你真♥相了
You stink at stuff.
你做啥事都很烂
Like painting.
比如刷墙就很烂
Fine. And you stink at stuff too.
行 你也做啥事都很烂啊
Like telling an intern what to do.
连叫实习生做事这事都不会
Ruth had to go to that concert.
露丝必须得去那演唱会嘛
She had the tickets for weeks.
人家好早就买的票了
It was Ashley D and Ashley B's joint birthday. Duh.
是她好友艾希莉D 艾希莉B的联合生日会呢
And so the intern's out having fun,
所以实习生在大玩特玩
and here we are, the bosses,
而我们这两位老板
painting the walls at 3:00 A.M.
半夜三点来这刷墙
Well, I'm painting.
我是在刷墙啊
You got a kind of autistic ballerina thing going on over there.
而你看起来像是自闭芭蕾舞者在犯二
Can I ask you something?
我能问你件事吗
I don't like Maroon 5.
我不喜欢魔力红
注释：魔力红乐队 美国知名新灵魂摇滚乐队
No matter how many times you ask,
你再问几次也一样
the answer will always be no.
不喜欢就是不喜欢
Not that.
不是要问这个
Would it be okay if I told Andy not to come over tonight
你觉得我今晚让安迪别来我们家合适吗
cause I'm so exhausted,
我今天太累了'
or is it a little too early in the relationship to be all,
还是你觉得才在一起不久 我就说
"I don't think I can have my legs up around my ears tonight"?
"我今天没精力把双腿开到耳旁 任你..."
It's fine.
没事的
You don't think he'd enjoy a night off
你觉得他就不会想要
from constant Maroon 5 badgering? He would.
放一晚假 不用被魔力红魔音穿脑吗
Feels awkward. Can't.
太尴尬 算了
My legs can go up there. They're fine.
双腿开到耳后 任他... 没问题的啦
I don't want to have that conversation right now.
我还不想跟他说到这事
Hey, look, I get it.
我懂你
There are conversations you don't want to have.
常有事情难以启齿 不想谈到
Like, "Hey, Ruth, here's $0.
例如 "露丝 这里是0圆薪水
Put down some rat traps."
去把捕鼠夹放好"
We have a box right here that's not touched.
那还完全没人去搞呢
Look, we're not talking about your relationship anymore.
都说了你的性事部分已经谈完
We're done.
别再说了
Relax. It's probably not even a rat,
别紧张嘛 不见得是大老鼠
it's probably a mouse. Not a big deal.
可能只是小小鼠辈 没事的
Oh, my God! Oh, my God, I see it! There it is!
妈呀 我的老天啊 我看到了 在那里
The mouse? That is not a mouse!
那小老鼠吗 才不是小老鼠
That is a car that a mouse drives!
那简直是有小老鼠开的车那么大
Oh my God. Where did you see it?
天啊 你看到它在哪
It was in the middle, right?
刚是在中间 对吧
Why are you whispering?
你干嘛那么小声
I don't want him to hear me.
我怕被他听见我
How do you know it's a he?
你怎么知道是个"他"
He looked at me kind of rapey.
他好像用眼神强♥奸了我
There! He just ran behind the thing!
那边 他跑到那玩意后面了
What thing? That thing!
什么玩意 那个玩意啊
This thing? Waah!
这个玩意吗
What? Did you see it?
怎么 你看见它了吗
I don't think so.
不确定
Oh, you'd know so. It has a saddle.
哪能不确定 它背上有马鞍呢
Oh, my God.
天啊
He just opened the door with the strength of his whiskers.
他刚靠胡须的巨力把那门顶开了
He's gone. He went into the kitchen.
他进了厨房 不见了
Oh, what should we do?
我们该怎么办啊
Should we call the cops?
要不要叫警察叔叔来
He doesn't have a gun.
他又没持枪
Let's just get out of here.
咱们就赶紧闪人
We'll call an exterminator in the morning.
然后明早让除害虫公司来搞吧
Too late, he's coming back!
晚了 他又回来了
Aah! He's charging us! He's gonna bite me!
他朝我们冲过来了 他要来咬我了
Waah! You can stop now!
可以停手了
You painted him to death.
你把人家活活刷死了
I just got a glimpse of you at a Barneys sample sale.
我仿佛看到了你在巴尼百货大抢购的画面
What a mess. Who's gonna clean that up?
血肉横飞 谁去清理啊
The intern?
实习生吧
Oh, Andy...
安迪...
I know. I'm good at this.
我知道 我龙精虎猛
What? Is there another rat?
怎么了 又有老鼠吗
What are you doing?
你干嘛啊
I forgot Andy was here!
我忘了安迪来了嘛
And your sex voice is the same as your murder voice.
而且你的浪♥叫跟杀人叫声如出一撤
So are you just gonna stand there?
你还要在那边继续看啊
Are you offering me a three way?
你是在邀请我"三人行"吗
Well, it looks like we're about to be a full blown orgy.
看来要激化成为杂交派对了
It's 2:00 A.M. Who could this be?
都半夜两点了 会是谁啊
It's Ruth.
是露丝
Ruth? Yes. I'm late, right?
露丝 对 我是不是来迟了
Why is she here?
她干嘛来啊
I texted her and said you needed an enema.
我发短信告诉她你需要灌肠剂
Okay, now, this is some industrial strength girl talk.
这是高强度工业等级的姐妹私房话吧
I had to do something to show her who was boss.
我得做出行动 让她知道谁主谁仆啊
I learned it while interning at Conde Nast.
我去康泰纳仕实习时学到的
注释：康泰纳仕 全球最著名的媒体集团之一 以生活方式杂志闻名
We've all gotten someone an enema in the middle of the night,
我们实习生都帮人半夜买过灌肠剂
it's a rite of passage.
算是个"通过仪式"
For someone to get their passage right?
帮助别人"通道"顺畅的仪式吗
Beat me to it.
抢了我台词啊
There. Go open the door.
到了 去开门吧
You know what has to happen.
你知道这非做不可
Max has to put Ruth in her place
麦克斯得让露丝干她的活
so she can learn how to be a boss.
她才有办法学着当个老板
Oh. That's all? Good.
就这样啊 那就好
Cause I thought from your tone,
刚才听你语气'
you were gonna force Max to have an enema.
我还以为你让她非做不可的是灌肠
Sorry I'm late.
抱歉我来晚了
I had the tiniest pot cookie and had to pull over to take a nap.
我吃了一小块大♥麻饼干 得停车打个小盹
Anyway, here is your enema. Enjoy.
好了 这是你的灌肠剂 慢慢享用
They only had the triple pack.
他们只卖三合一包
Wait, Ruth?
等等 露丝
Max has something she wants to say to you.
麦克斯有话想对你说
Max, what did you want to say to Ruth?
麦克斯 你想对露丝说什么来着
Um, thanks for the triple?
谢谢你买的三合一包
Three times the fun.
三倍药量 三倍享受
You sure you don't want me to help you with that?
你确定不要我帮忙吗
Oh, no, it's okay.
不用 没事的
You took the rat traps out of the box, you need a break.
你把捕鼠夹都拿出箱子呢 需要休息一下
Plus, we couldn't afford the game mouse trap when I was a kid,
而且 小时候我家买不起捕鼠夹桌游
and this is the closest I'm gonna get.
这是我能玩到最像的版本了
So, when do you make the cupcakes?
那你打算什么时候烤小蛋糕啊
I guess I could make them now.
我可以现在就做啊
Fun. I'll go get the coffees, right?
太好了 那我去喝个咖啡 好吧
Sure, of course. Do whatever.
当然可以 没问题 随你吧
You got a life. Who am I to tell you what to do?
你有美好人生 我凭什么对你颐指气使
Well, here's our Martha Stewart blurb,
这是玛莎给我们的宣传文宣
All blown up
放大印制
and ready to roll out and paste up on that wall.
准备好要摊开贴上墙了
Where's Ruth? She's in the kitchen.
露丝呢 她在厨房里
I was just in there. Then she's in the bathroom.
我刚从厨房出来 那她是在厕所吧
Oh, my God, you're Haning me!
天啊 你在把我当阿憨耍
She took a coffee break.
她去喝咖啡休息一下嘛
What? She didn't need a break.
什么 她才不需要休息
She just started 20 minutes ago.
她20分钟前才开工呢
Your rich is really coming out,
你的有钱人姿态又露出来了
and it is not pretty.
真是面目可憎啊
Forgot my phone.
忘了拿我手机了
I mean, get it together, Ruth, right?
上紧发条啊 露丝 你们说是吧
Watch and learn.
看我示范 学着点
Ruth, can you put the rat traps down, one in each corner,
露丝 可以去把捕鼠夹放到店里每一个墙角吗
and then you can get coffee later after interning.
等你的实习工作弄完了 要喝咖啡再去
Thanks.
谢了
She's kind of a tool, right?
她挺傻♥逼的 对吧
Max, were you saying something? Nope.
麦克斯 你刚说什么了吗 没有啊
Ouch!
疼啊
Right?
对吧
Oh, look at this cage.
你看这个笼子
I think my mom used to dance in it.
我妈以前在里面跳过舞吧[脱衣舞娘]
Here they are.
就是这个
These are the ones I had the guy hold for us.
我让人家替我保留的就在这了
Only $600 for all of them.
全套只需600块钱
What do ya think, daddy?
你觉得如何啊 干爹
I like 'em, doll. Wrap 'em up.
小美人 挺不错的 统统买了
And can daddy get something he wants?
那干爹可以买点自己想要的东西吗
So cute. Over the counter?
真可爱 放柜台上方吗
And that way when I'm hungover and taking a nap,
这样就算我宿醉在店里打盹
People can still find the cupcakes.
人家也知道小蛋糕在哪卖
We could have Ruth clean it
我们可以叫露丝把它擦干净
and then paint and reupholster these.
然后让她粉刷这些并重换椅面
By the way, where is she?
对了 她人呢
She was supposed to be here an hour ago.
她一个小时前就该到这里了
Text her and find out where she is.
发短信给她 查出她在哪
Why are you so interested in where she is, what she's doing?
你干嘛对人家身在何处 在干嘛有兴趣啊
Are you obsessed with her?
你是迷恋上人家了吗
Max, I don't want to make a purse out of her skin.
麦克斯 我又不是要扒她皮做皮包
I just want her to do her job.
只是让她尽本分而已
Never mind. I'll just text her.
算了 我来给她发短信吧
Well, be careful.
小心点
Don't delete any of my penis with a hat pictures.
别误删我珍藏的鸡鸡戴帽图
Even if I did, it's not a big deal.
就算误删了 也没什么损失啊
Oleg will always pose again.
奥列格随时乐意重拍
Yeah, but I'll never get that little pilgrim hat back.
但是我的感恩节小帽已经一去不返了
WHERE ARE YOU? WE NEEDED YOU HERE YESTERDAY."
你人在哪 你"昨天"就该到了"
All in caps, 'cause bosses talk in caps.
全大写 当老板的都是用全大写
Total tool.
纯傻♥逼
Look at that.
你看
Texted right back, 'cause I'm the boss.
马上回短信 因为我是老板
She says...
她回...
Yesterday was super hard so she's not feeling great
她昨天太累了 她人不太舒服
And she can't come in today?
所以她今天来不了
That's it. She's fired.
我受够了 炒了她
Here. You have to fire her.
给 你来负责炒她
She said she was sick, Conde nasty.
她都说她病了 你个康德那屎
She's not sick, she's just taking advantage
她才没病呢 只是看你好说话
cause you're too friendly with her.
占你便宜 偷懒呢'
She works for us.
她是给我们打工的
Yeah, for free.
对啊 免♥费干白活呢
Why don't you just hollow her out
你怎么不干脆挖空人家
and live inside of her, you monster?
住进她身体里啊 你个禽兽老板
Um, I don't think we were supposed to get this.
她好像是发错还是怎么着了
The dumb one wants me to pick up all this crappy furniture.
白♥痴的那个叫我去弄回垃圾家具
Right?
对吧
As if.
我可能去吗
I'll be at the bar in ten. Order me a bellini.
我十点会到酒吧 先帮我点杯贝里尼酒"
Oh, who's the monster now?
她才是禽兽员工吧
She called you the dumb one.
她叫你"白♥痴的那个"
Uh, she called you the dumb one. 430
她是叫你白♥痴的那个
It's your phone, you're the dumb one.
她是发给你的手机 你才是白♥痴的那个拜托
She knows I don't talk in caps, so that's to you.
她知道我不会用全大写 是在说你呢
You're the dumb one.
你才是那个白♥痴
Fire her. No, you fire her.
炒了她 要炒自己炒
No, you fire her.
不要 你来炒
No, you hired her, you fire her.
我不要 你雇用的人 你自己炒
I wanted to go with Molly big boobs.
我想雇的是大奶茉莉
She'd be here right now with four chairs on each boob.
她就会准时 一边奶♥子挂好四椅子准备走了
Why can't you just fire her?
为什么你不炒她啊
It's clear she called you the dumb one.
很明显她就是叫你白♥痴
All right, fine, I know she called me the dumb one.
行行行 我知道她叫我"白♥痴的那个"
But I can't fire her.
但我就是不能炒她
I want to, but there is a block.
我想炒 但我有个障碍
Right here.
在这里
It comes up, and then goes, "nope!"
它会浮上来 说"不行"
It goes right back down.
然后它就继续潜水
I am not supposed to fire someone.
我不应该是炒人的那个
I am the someone who's supposed to be fired.
我应该是当被人炒的那个
So I guess I'm the boss, then.
看来老板得我当了
Sounds like a plan. I'll be in my mom's cage.
这可以 我去我妈的笼子里等你
All right, come on, you lowly worker.
行 那滚过来 你个下层工人
Help the boss pull these chairs out.
帮忙老板把椅子拉出去
Don't yell at me, boss. I'm blocked.
少对我嚷嚷了 老板 我有"障碍"
Wish you had your enemas now, don't you?
后悔没听我的去灌肠 清"障碍"了吧
They followed us! We walked into a trap!
它们跟过来了 我们落入陷阱了
It's a vendetta!
这是鼠辈的复仇
Ugh, I can't believe this!
我真不敢相信
Our intern's out having cocktails
我们的实习生在喝鸡尾酒
and I'm trapped on top of rat mountain!
而我们被困在鼠山鼠海中
He's coming after me!
他来找我报仇了
Oh, my God!
我的天啊
Max! Help!
麦克斯 救我
No, you bastards! Get off her!
不行 你们这些鼠辈 离她远点
Get off!
滚远点
My foot's caught under this thing!
我的脚卡在这东西下了
Max, that was amazing.
麦克斯 你太猛了
You just lifted that giant thing up with one hand.
你单手把那大铁闸给举起了
I know.
我知道
And now I'm gonna fire that bitch!
现在老娘要炒了那小贱♥人
Wow. You suck at this too.
哇 你贴东西也好烂
Sorry I'm late.
抱歉我来迟了
I was having a dream that I was sleeping in,
我做梦梦到了我睡过头
then I woke up, and I was. 473 谁是老板Who's the boss?
醒来之后 才发现真睡过头了
Tony Danza?
托尼·丹扎
注释：托尼·丹扎 美国男演员 曾出演情景喜剧《谁是老板》
No, Max, who's the boss?
不 麦克斯 谁才是老板
I am.
我才是
Have a seat, Ruth.
露丝 请坐
Here?
这吗
Good call.
聪明的选择
In addition to being a boss,
除了是一个老板
I am also a waitress.
我也是个女服务员
But when I do my job, I don't call people dumb.
但当我在工作时 我从不叫人白♥痴
All right, I do, but at least it's to their face.
好吧 我是有叫人白♥痴 但我是当面叫
Oh, you're talking about that thing?
你在说那件事啊
I meant Caroline.
我叫的是卡洛琳啦
No, I know you meant me,
不 我知道你是说我
Because I'm not dumb and neither is Caroline.
因为我不是白♥痴 卡洛琳也不白♥痴
And one thing I figured out is that in business,
而做生意我学到的一件事就是
maybe I have to be a little more Ruthless.
有时候我得更铁石心肠[无露丝]
Meaning no more Ruth. You're fired.
也就是没有露丝 你被炒了
So, I'm not getting college credit?
所以我弄不到大学学分了吗
I'll probably get kicked out of school again,
我大概又要被踢出学校了
But no worries, right?
不过没事啦 对吧
I'm really proud of how you stuck up for yourself.
你站出来为自己说话 我真以你为荣
You're fired. Sorry, I can't stop.
你也被炒了 抱歉 停不住了
麦克斯自制小蛋糕是威廉斯堡必尝好滋味
Look, Max.
你看 麦克斯
We're on our way.
离梦想越来越近了