蛋糕店创业派对

Earl, time to play Marry, sleep with, or kill:
厄尔 来玩结婚 上床 或杀掉游戏之
Diner edition.
餐厅版吧
Ladies, booth one?
一号卡座的妞们
Sleep with, sleep with, slept with.
上她 上她 上过她
Nice.
厉害
Okay, Max, the dude at table ten.
到你了 麦克斯 十号桌男的
Is there a throw food in the cage and run category?
有丢食物进笼后就跑的选项吗
Hey, jump in.
过来参一脚
We're playing Marry, sleep with, or kill:
我们在玩结婚 上床 或杀掉游戏之
Diner edition.
餐厅版
No, if I slept with anyone in this diner,
不 如果我跟这餐厅里任何一人上过床
I'd kill myself.
我会想杀了自己
Even in a fictional scenario,
就算只是假设一下
I cannot permit myself to go there.
我也不能这么无下限
Girl, you'd take the fun out of the punch bowl full of cocaine.
妹子 嗑药再兴奋都被你一扫而光了
Okay, fine.
好吧 玩就玩
Sleep with Earl, marry you.
上厄尔 娶你
Not us! Jeez.
靠 别说我们啊
What are you, a freak?
你是怪胎还是变态啊
I feel uncomfortable, Caroline.
卡洛琳 你弄得人家好不舒服
Like, I don't know how to look at you anymore.
人家都不知道怎么面对你了
Now, I can only see you in a creepy lady tux.
你在我心里变成穿怪怪女燕尾服的怪人了
You said it was just a game!
你自己说只是个游戏的
I'm not in love with you. Back off!
我一点都不爱你 离我远点
It was just a joke, Earl.
厄尔 只是说着玩而已啦
The things we say in jest, darling.
亲爱的 开玩笑也要有个度
The things we say in jest.
没度就是无下限啊
Oh, my God,
天啊
look at the RSVP list for our opening party.
你看同意出席开幕派对的人数
Max's homemade cupcakes is at capacity.
麦克斯自制小蛋糕店要塞不下啦
Hey, we might even be overbooked,
出席人数可能不止这些
because in my experience, even when guys
根据我的经验 很多男的
say they're not going to come, they do.
都说不会来[不射] 最后还不是都来了
Caroline, booth two has been waiting
卡洛琳 二号卡座等上菜
for service for ten minutes!
都等了足足10分钟了
And Han knows how frustrating that is,
阿憨绝对了解那烦躁感
cause he's been waiting to be serviced for years.
因为他多年一直都等不到人上菜'
Not that it's any of your business, Max,
虽然这完全不关你鸟事
but I have a very active sex life.
但我可是有着丰富的性生活呢
So then, Han, will you be bringing a date tomorrow night?
既然如此 阿憨你明天会带妞出席吗
Ah, no.
不会...
You do understand that sex involves two people, right?
你知道性♥爱这事得有两个人吧
And that one of those people has to be you?
而且你自己得是其中一个哦
What is all this dirty talk?
一直说这些龌龊言语干嘛
This is a diner, not a dirty talking place.
这里是餐厅 不是龌龊言语之地
Sorry, Han, I know we still work here at night.
抱歉 阿憨 我们知道自己还是员工
I'll go right over to the booth.
我立刻就去上菜
We were just talking about our big opening party.
我们刚是在谈我们盛大的开幕派对
All you ever talk about is your big opening.
你们整天就会说那大开幕
Now who has the potty mouth?
到底谁才龌龊啊
Max, I need your guest list names.
麦克斯 给我你的宾客名单
Oh, okay, I'm still waiting for them to confirm,
我还在等他们确认出席呢
so just put me down for ten.
先算个10个人吧
Okay, but I need their names ASAP.
行 但是你得尽速给我名单
I'm running a tight door.
我会把门禁搞得很严
I got a bouncer from a local club to donate his time.
我请了附近酒吧的保安来免♥费帮忙
I told him it was a charity event for eczema.
我说我们是为湿疹病人做慈善募款
What? We'll make a big donation when we're successful,
干嘛 哪天功成名就了再捐一大笔钱嘛
But, for tomorrow, every now and then, scratch a little?
不过明天记得 有空就抓个几下痒哦
Hi, everybody! I got great news.
各位 我有个大好新闻
What? You finally found the thing we lost in there?
你找出我们弄丢在里面的东西了吗
No. I knew we should've tied a string on it.
没呢 我当时就知道该拿线绑上
No, look. I got a fax from Poland.
我收到了来自波兰的传真
My dream house is done! Isn't it amazing?
我的梦想豪宅盖好了 很厉害吧
It is amazing.
的确很厉害啊
I haven't seen a fax in, like, five years.
我都好几年没见过传真了
Sophie, it's so pretty!
苏菲 好漂亮啊
Look at all this sweet gingerbread woodwork on the porch.
你门廊上的那些木工活 超棒的啊
Oh, I'm so excited.
我超兴奋的呢
I'm going to be on Air Poland flight right after big party.
等明天派对结束 我就搭机回国
You are going to Poland? That's news.
你要回波兰 新闻啊
And when were you going to tell me?
你打算何时跟我说这事呢
Um, now, yeah.
现在啊
Um, I'm going to be gone for a month.
我会回去一个月
Oh, okay.
好吧
It will be good to have some time away
休息一阵 不玩老玩的那
from the old ball and chain.
球加链也好
Yah, he's not talking about me.
他不是在说我
We use a ball and chain in our lovemaking.
是说我们做♥爱时用的链球
That's the thing I can't find.
弄丢的就是那个玩意
Okay, yeah.
就这样吧
Well, buh bye.
好啦 我走了
I'll see you tomorrow night at my big going away party!
明晚我的盛大告别派对上见啦
Sophie, the party's for our cupcake business.
苏菲 明晚是小蛋糕店的开幕派对
Oh, see, this is why I don't like you so much.
瞧 所以说我太不喜欢你嘛
Guys, thanks again for donating your time.
各位 谢谢你们的义务帮忙
It's fundraisers like this that will help
举办这样的隐睾症募款会
put an end to undescended testicles.
病友们才能有免受苦难的一天
Hi!
你好
I'd like to meet the owner of this awesome
想见见这超牛逼 又超酷的
and totally cool cupcake shop?
小蛋糕店的老板
Oh, nevermind! That's me.
不用麻烦 因为老娘就是老板
Max, you got a blow out!
麦克斯 你让人给你吹了头
Yeah, I'd figured I finally see
是啊 我就想着去见识一下
what all the fuss about getting blown is.
别人老说着的 去给人吹是怎样
Oh, hi, we're not quite ready for guests yet.
您好 还没到我们开始宴客的时间呢
Girl, I'm your doorman, Nevel.
女孩们 我是你们的门卫 涅维尔
Oh, I'm confused. I thought my doorman was
抱歉 我还以为我们的门卫是...
Straight, white, and boring? He was.
无聊白人直男吗 本来是的
Then, boring came down with the flu.
但是无聊男染上了流感
Now, you've got gay, black, and definitely not boring.
所以就换成了又黑又基又不无聊的我啦
So what's the charity tonight?
今晚是为什么疾病募款呢
Eczema. Undescended testicles.
湿疹 隐睾症
People with eczema and undescended testicles.
为身染湿疹与患有隐睾症的人募款
Lord, child. That is a cross to bear.
神啊 这也太悲催太凄惨了吧
Get me the door list,
把宾客名单给我
and let's make those poor, itchy boys some money.
赶紧帮这些可怜的蛋痒男募款治病吧
Another fake charity?
又瞎编了一个慈善项目啊
You've got some balls, even if they aren't descended.
你真有种[睾丸] 还是隐睾症的睾啊
Max, we so lucked out.
麦克斯 我们太幸运了
Nothing says successful party
有个毒舌基佬门卫
like a bitchy, gay doorman!
最能显现派对办得很成功了
Give me your guest names. I'll write them down.
给我你邀请的宾客名单 我写下来
Okay, fine.
好吧 念给你
Put down Tommy, Dylan, Robbie, Johnny
帮我写下 汤米 迪伦 罗比 强尼...
Robbie and Johnny?
罗比跟强尼吗
Wait, Max, are these all your ex boyfriends?
等等 麦克斯 这些全是你的前男友吗
Perhaps.
大概吧
Max, the invited guests
麦克斯 邀请的宾客
were all supposed to be business contacts.
应该全是有生意往来的朋友啊
See, this is why I didn't tell you sooner.
你看 所以我才不想太早告诉你
You're a control freak.
你是个超级控制狂
And for the record, these guys have all had contact
而他们也都跟我的生意本钱
with my business.
有过往来啊
You're using our launch party
你是在用开幕派对
to get back at ex boyfriends?
来羞辱你前男友们吗
Uh, yeah!
废话
That's what success is for,
成功不就是为了这个吗
to say suck it to people who dumped you.
让你可以对甩掉你的人说 你去死吧[吸它]
See my blown out hair? Suck it!
看到姐这美爆的秀发了吗 你去死吧
See my cool cupcake shop? Suck it!
看到姐的超酷小蛋糕店了吗 你去死吧
See these in this blouse? You wish you could suck it.
看到姐衣服下的胸器了吗 你死都没得吸了
And here, it is not just boyfriends on my list.
而且名单上不是只有我的前男友们
I also invited the lady from Staples
我还邀请了文具店那
who gives me attitude.
狗眼看人低的店员
She can suck it too.
顺便也让她去死吧
Fine, but how is inviting Johnny
行行行 但你邀请强尼夫妇来
and his new wife a victory?
你是哪里比人家成功呢
Oh, like this.
就像这样
Hi, Mrs. Johnny. Nice to meet you.
你好啊 强尼太太 幸会幸会
You got him, but I got these
你有渣男 姐有逼人胸器
and all this, so suck it.
跟超酷小店 所以你去死吧
I'm not so sure this is healthy.
你这样有点神经吧
Are you kidding me?
拜托哦
This is the healthiest thing I've done in my life.
这是我这辈子最不神经的一件事了
I even thought about inviting my mother to come and suck it,
我还想过邀请我妈来让她去死吧
but then she'd realize maybe I didn't commit suicide
但这样她就知道我两年前留下的
two years ago like my note said.
自杀遗书是骗人的了
I'm about ready to open.
我准备好放人进来了
Shouldn't we be putting up some testicle banners,
但我们不挂一些睾丸横幅
or scrotum posters, or something?
或阴囊海报之类的吗
Also, there's a cute blonde boy out here asking for you
对了 外面有个超可爱的金发男找你
that I'm about to eat alive.
我都想饿基扑男了
That's Andy with the free bar stuff.
安迪带免♥费酒吧的东西来了
Go, I'm gonna stay here
你先去吧 我在这待会儿
and practice my Suck it face for a while.
多练习下等会要用的你去死吧脸
How's this?
如何
That look is so much more suck it
新弄的直发搭配你那脸
with the straight hair.
真是绝配啊
I know, right?
我也这么觉得
There's my cute boyfriend. Hey.
我可爱的男人来啦
How did everything go at spike's liquor?
去酒店买酒的过程如何
Well, I got a little bit confused
我去买的时候有点搞不清
about what charity we're pretending to help,
我们要假装是哪种慈善活动
so I told them my sister's homeless
我就跟店员说 我姐妹是流浪汉
and my balls are up inside me.
隐睾症让我的蛋缩得老高
Now, we just gotta hope spike's not the chatty type.
只希望店员是真懂行 不是乱瞎扯了
Oh! They just dropped.
蛋蛋都回归原位了
Hey, Andy, question.
安迪 问你个问题
What does this face say to you?
你觉得我这是什么表情
I don't know, like, I'm cool.
不知道 我很酷吗
So close! Guess again.
很接近了 再猜一次
Okay, like, I'm better than you.
那是不是我比你强
No, like, I'm it, and you can suck it.
不对 是老娘超♥屌 你去死吧
Yes! Yes! They can suck it!
没错没错 他们去死吧
Is that what you're wearing tonight?
你今晚就穿这样吗
Yeah. No?
对啊... 不行吗
A sweater?
毛衣啊
I always saw you in a suit tonight.
我一直想着你今晚穿西装呢
Run home real quick and put on a suit.
快跑回家换套西装吧
Hurry, people are starting to come.
快点 宾客很快要来了
Uh, Max is still making the face.
麦克斯还在做那副表情呢
I know. I can't stop.
我知道 人家停不下来嘛
I've waited my whole life to make this face.
我这辈子都在等着做这表情呢
Max, look.
麦克斯 你瞧
Our business is open.
我们的生意开张了
Wait, wait, wait. Not quite.
等等 还差一点呢
In five, four, three, two.
倒数 五 四 三 二...
Name, please? Sophie Kuchenski.
您的名字 苏菲·科臣斯基
Guest of honor.
荣誉贵宾哦
How many in your party?
您带了多少位[您派对有多少人]
See, I knew it was my party!
看 我就知道是我的派对
Max, there's a line all the way down the hall
麦克斯 队伍排满了整个走廊呢
And I've given out, like, a hundred business cards!
我都发出去快一百张名片了
You know what that means?
你知道这代表什么吗
Being poor can suck it!
贫穷去死吧
Girl, the fire marshal just dropped by,
女孩们 消防局的人刚来了
and told me we can't let anymore people in
说法规限制 里面宾客过多
till some of these folks go out.
得走一批才能再进新的人
Nevel, none of my guests are even here yet.
涅维尔 我邀请的人都还没进来呢
It is very important to let in any guy who looks hot,
所以你只能放那些看起来超帅
but you know would screw you over.
但一看就会让你伤心的渣男进来
Is there any other type?
帅哥不都这么渣吗
I'll go get some more cupcakes.
我再进去拿点小蛋糕
Hey! How's it going so far, babe?
宝贝 活动如何
Andy, what are you doing?
安迪 你这是干嘛
I told you to come back in a suit.
我不是叫你回家换西装吗
yeah, I know, but I like what I'm wearing.
是啊 但我就喜欢我身上这套
So you're telling me you'll just go and do what you want,
你的意思是说 无论我多用力逼你
no matter how much I try to control you?
你就是打算不听话 随心所欲吗
Yeah.
是的
That is so freaking hot.
你这样真是帅爆了
Caroline!
卡洛琳
Caroline, I can't get in!
卡洛琳 他不让我进来
Caroline!
卡洛琳
Less kissing, more noticing me!
少接点吻 多注意我啊
See, I know her, and my name's on the list.
我认识她 我的名字就在名单上
Han Lee.
李憨
Honey, if I was a fat girl,
小可爱 就算我是个肥妞
and your name was Sara Lee,
而你的名字是叫李莎拉
You still wouldn't be getting in.
我也不会发♥情放你进来
We are at capacity!
里面满员了
Hey, Robbie. On the list.
我叫罗比 在名单上
Go right on in, child.
快请进 小宝贝
Uh, hello?
不是满员吗
Do you need a dictionary to define the word Capacity?
要给你本字典 让你看看满员的意思吗
I have clear orders:
我收到明确指示
Only very hot men who look like trouble.
性感的超帅渣男才放行
Excuse me, you know where I can find Max?
抱歉 请问麦克斯在哪
Yes, she's in the back. Cool.
她就在后头 好的
Robbie, it's me, Caroline.
罗比 是我啊 卡洛琳
Oh, sorry.
抱歉 没认出来
Did we have sex?
我们是不是上过床啊
What? No!
什么 才没有呢
I'm Max's roommate.
我是麦克斯的室友
Oh, Max had a roommate?
麦克斯有过室友啊
I was pretty much wasted the whole time.
我当初真是整天都烂醉啊
I remember, like, nothing,
我几乎什么都记不得了
But I'm in the program now, so it's one day at a time.
我加入了戒酒协会 现在一天去一次
Well, Max is through there. Cool.
好吧 麦克斯就在里面 谢了
But we did have sex, right?
但我们是上过床的对吧
No! We did not have sex.
才没有 我们没上过床
You offered, but I wasn't into you.
你邀过我 不过我对你没感觉
Yeah, right.
我会信才有鬼
Hey, Max. Robbie!
麦克斯 罗比
Why are you making that face?
你干嘛摆这副表情
You have a toothache or something?
你牙疼还是怎么了嘛
No, it's I'm successful now
不是啊 只是我现在功成名就了
and this is my shop.
这是我开的店呢
Wow. Cool.
哇 厉害啊
So listen, I'm an alcoholic now,
我知道我之前是个酒鬼
and I did a lot of stuff that wasn't cool,
做了很多不应该的事情
and I came here because the program
我来是因为戒酒会让我来
says that I have to make almonds.
为我以前的所作所为餐会
Almonds?
餐会
You mean Amends?
你是说忏悔吗
Cool.
好
So, look, I cheated on you
我知道我以前对你不忠
behind your back, like, every day.
每天都趁你不在时跟人乱搞
Well, um, we don't have to go into all this now.
我们可以不用现在搞忏悔
It's kind of a big night for me.
我今晚很多事呢
And I stole money from you too,
还偷了你的钱
like, every time we had sex.
每次做♥爱完都偷你的钱
but we had a lot of sex.
我们做了很多呢
I know.
是啊
Well, I stole a lot of money.
所以我也偷了你很多钱
Well, this just went from suck it to it sucks,
这下从你去死吧变成我去死吧
So lift up your shirt.
把衣服掀起来
I gotta get something out of tonight.
今晚总得捞点本回来
Money well spent.
我那些钱也算花得值了
Just found out I paid for more sex
刚刚才知道我花在做♥爱上的钱
than an arab businessman.
比一个阿♥拉♥伯商人还多
Maybe this wasn't the healthiest thing I could've done tonight.
或许我今晚不应该做这么神经的事
So what do you wanna do?
那你打算怎么做
Should I tell Nevel to keep Johnny out?
要不要让涅维尔别放强尼进来
Too late. Way too late.
晚了 来不及了
Max.
麦克斯
Hi.
好久不见
You look even better than I remember.
你今晚比我记忆中的你还美
Well, I should. I just got blown.
应该的 才让人吹的头呢
Suck it, suck it, suck it, suck it.
你去死吧 你去死吧 你去死吧
Max, this place is so awesome.
麦克斯 你这小店太棒了
It's like you're telling everybody
棒到像是在跟所有
who ever doubted you to suck it.
怀疑过你的人说 你们去死吧
No, we're not petty like that.
才没有 我们才没这么可悲
Hey, it's a little loud in here.
里面有点吵
You wanna talk in the hall?
要不要去走廊上聊聊
Uh, wait, let me take a look around my big, successful shop.
让我看一眼我偌大的成功店面一眼
Yeah, I can go.
行 可以去一会
Keep your eye on Max.
注意好麦克斯
That guy in the Brad Pitt glasses broke her heart,
那戴着布拉德·皮特眼镜的男人伤过她心
and I don't trust him.
我不信任那家伙
Max, you look insanely good.
麦克斯 你今晚真美
Thanks.
谢谢夸奖
Now, maybe you could repeat that to your wife,
要不要把这句话对你老婆复诵一遍啊
And where is she?
她人呢
We never got married.
我没有跟她结婚
Max! Max! I can't get in!
麦克斯 麦克斯 我进不去
Wait, what do you mean you didn't get married?
什么 你这没结过婚是什么意思
Johnny! Hey, Johnny, I'm back here!
强尼 强尼 我在这呢
I didn't know if I was gonna tell you,
我不知道该不该对你说
but then I got your invite
然后又接到你的邀请函
Max! Johnny! I'm back here!
麦克斯 强尼 我在这呢
Should we just go say hi?
要不要过去打个招呼
Uh, no, not right now.
不必 现在没空
Max! Max! I can't get in!
麦克斯 麦克斯 我进不去
Max! Johnny!
麦克斯 强尼
Max, I've been thinking about you a lot.
麦克斯 我一直很想你
Stop. Before you say anything else,
停 在你说任何话之前
I just have to say
我想说...
I need candy.
我要先吃糖
All right, what were you saying?
好了 你刚要说什么来着
I called off the wedding because she wasn't the one,
我取消了婚礼 她不是我的真命天女
And you wanna know how I know that?
想知道我从何得知吗
Max! Johnny!
麦克斯 强尼
I can't get into the party!
我进不去派对现场
Come here.
过来
Help me out!
帮帮我
Seriously!
求你了
That doorman is a biatch!
那门卫就是一贱♥货
Okay, so, uh
好了 所以...
Wait, what are we doing?
等等 我们在干嘛
Making out in a room full of candy.
在放满糖果的房间里亲热
Right.
对哦
No, no, this can't happen.
不行 不能这样
I was gonna give you my suck it face.
我本来要给你我的你去死吧脸呢
Okay, give it to me. I deserve it.
行 对我做吧 我应得的
Your suck it face is hot.
你的你去死吧脸好性感
It's the hair.
是发型的功劳
Greatest night of my life!
我人生中最棒的一晚了
T恤Disclaimer: this is not my T shirt,
我声明 这不是我的
Though I am all about the girl power.
当然 我也很支持女力的啦
Disclaimer: it's not my T shirt either.
我声明 这也不是我的T恤
Some nerd left it in the dryer at the laundromat.
是某个书呆忘在洗衣店的
It's mine.
那件是我的
Girl power!
女力哦
No way. No way!
不是吧 不是吧
Do I smell chocolate chips?
我闻到的是巧克力碎吗
And is uncle Andy making pancakes?
是安迪叔叔在做煎饼吗
You do, and I am.
你没闻错 我也做了
Dude, I don't know you,
兄台 虽然我不认识你
but chocolate chip pancakes are the balls.
但是巧克力碎煎饼超♥屌啊
How did you two sleep?
你们俩睡得如何
Did we sleep?
哪有时间睡呀
Great! So what's gonna happen now?
很好 那接下来会如何呢
I meant today, at the shop,
我是说今天店里的事
our big first day in business!
我们隆重开业的首日呢
You thought I was talking about you two?
你们以为我是在说你们的关系吗
Plbbt! I don't care about you two.
噗 我才懒得管你们俩
Plbbt! Nobody cares about you two.
噗 谁有空管你们俩啊
Well, first, we have to clean the party mess up.
首先 我们得先清理昨晚派对的垃圾
Andy and I did it last night
昨晚我跟安迪打扫完了
when you didn't come back.
在你不知去何处鬼混的时候
Um, can someone here mellow out
某人是不是该放轻松点
and put some pancakes in her pancake hole?
塞点煎饼进她的煎饼洞里啊
No, Caroline, I get it.
没事 卡洛琳 我明白
It's been a rocky ride for Max and me.
我跟麦克斯一路以来的情路不顺
See, when we met, I had a girlfriend.
我跟她刚认识时 我有个女朋友
Which he never told her about, and
但他从来没告诉过她 然后...
And keep eating.
然后接着吃啊
and because of that,
因为这样
Max and I never really got together,
我和麦克斯没有真正在一起过
and then that girl and I broke up,
而我也跟那女人分手了
and by the time I saw Max again, I was
后来再见到麦克斯时 我...
Engaged to be married?
订了婚准备结婚
Yeah, yeah, I was gonna get married.
是的 我当时准备结婚了
Wait, to that same girlfriend?
等等 是跟之前那女朋友吗
Different one. Different one.
不是的 另外一个
Yeah, but that didn't work out either,
但那事后来也没成
and I've had a couple girlfriends since
之后我也再交过几个女朋友
Oh! Only a couple!
哟 还几个呢
Yeah, none of them seemed to work out.
是啊 但是跟她们也一个都没成
None of them are Max.
她们都取代不了麦克斯
Hey, save me a pancake.
帮我留一个煎饼
It looks like Caroline has plans to eat them all.
卡洛琳好像想把它们统统吃光
Well, Max, as far as the suck it plan goes,
麦克斯 你这个让人去死吧计划
it looks like somebody sucked something.
没让某人死成 还自己成了你去吸吧
Pancakes, pancake hole.
煎饼 煎饼洞
He's a good guy.
他是个好人啦
Yeah, he seems cool.
他看起来不错啦
Kinda falls in love a lot, but hey...
虽然常常坠入爱河 不过...
And I did not tell him to say that.
我没叫他说这些
He never does what I say. It's hot.
他从来不听我指挥 太性感了
But hey what?
不过什么
Oh, we're continuing?
还继续说啊
Um, I don't know.
我不知道怎么说
Maybe I'm partial, but Max,
我说可能有些偏颇 但麦克斯
You're an A.
你是个A级姑娘
He kind of seems like a B.
而他感觉只是个B级男
B Minus.
是 B-
First of all, look at me.
首先 看好了
I am clearly a D,
我这是D级胸器
and I don't think he falls in love a lot.
而且他也没有整天坠入爱河好吗
Man, I love, love, love pancakes.
天啊 我对煎饼爱爱爱不完
If I could, I would marry a pancake.
如果可以 我真想娶个煎饼
What time is it?
几点了
10:20.
十点二十
Well, it's the first day open.
开业首日嘛
All those people are probably tired from the party.
大家可能昨晚都玩太累了
Yeah.
有道理
Oh, and look! We forgot to light it up.
你看 我们也忘了打开这个
People don't know we're open.
人家不知道我们开门了
In five, four, three, two.
倒数五 四 三 二...
Go to work.
上班吧
First day! Yep.
第一天嘛 是的
No one's here.
没人来
Remember: all we have to sell is 70 cupcakes a day
记得 我们一天只要卖70个小蛋糕
to keep on track.
就能开下去了
70cupcakes? That's not so hard.
70个小蛋糕 不难嘛
Maybe we should do the light again.
我们再重开一次那灯吧
In five, four, three, two.
倒数五 四 三 二...
What time is it now?
现在几点了
Tomorrow, we only need to sell 140 cupcakes.
明天 我们只需卖掉140个小蛋糕就行
cupcakes! That's not so hard.
140个小蛋糕 不难嘛140
How many did we sell today?
我们今天卖掉了几个
Four.
四个
And all were to Johnny.
都卖给强尼了
I think I've made a terrible mistake.
我觉得我犯了大错
It's only been three days.
才刚开始三天而已
Business will pick up.
生意会慢慢起步的
No, with Johnny.
不 是跟强尼的事
It's different now that he's available. 441 说不定我是那种人Maybe I'm the kind of person
情况不同了 他现在是单身
who only wants something they can't have,
只喜欢得不到的东西
and then when they get it, they don't want it anymore.
然后一旦得到又不喜欢了
Okay, but do you feel that way about the cupcake shop too?
那你对我们的小蛋糕店也有这种感觉吗
No, I love our cupcake shop.
没有 我爱我们的小蛋糕店
Wow, that's the first time I've ever said
哇 这是我第一次脱口说出
I loved anything out loud,
我爱某样东西呢
except for robitussin.
我只对感冒糖浆说过[喝多会上瘾]
It's Johnny.
强尼来了
Well, I know what I have to do.
好吧 我知道我该怎么做
Max, you can't change your mind about him now.
麦克斯 你不能现在反悔啊
He's our only customer!
他是我们唯一的顾客
By the way, I've always loved him.
我一直以来都很喜欢他呢
Hey, guys.
你们好啊
Um, could we talk in the kitchen?
我们能进厨房里谈谈吗
Wait, before you go, I just wanna say
等等 在你进去之前 我想说
that no matter what goes down in life,
无论生活中发生了多少挫折
we are always open to your business.
我们的店永远对你敞开
We're either gonna have crazy kitchen sex
我们不是要在疯狂地在厨房搞一炮
or I'm getting expelled.
就是我要被甩了
We're not having kitchen sex.
我们不会在这搞一炮的
It's way too dirty in here
这里太脏了
from other people having kitchen sex.
被其他在这搞过的人弄得太脏了
So I'm getting expelled?
所以就是我要被甩了
It's weird, right? Between us?
我们俩很怪 很纠结对吧
Yeah, I don't know what it is.
是啊 我也不知道这算什么
Maybe it's an absence of a lot of candy...
可能是现在没有糖果雨之类的吧
but it's not the same.
但感觉就是不同了
Max! Johnny! I thought I heard you.
麦克斯 强尼 我就觉得听到你们声音了
Max!
麦克斯
I can't get out!
我出不来啊
Maybe we're only at our best
或许只有在你有个女朋友时
when you have another girlfriend.
才是我们最适合的时候吧
Maybe give me a call when you get that going
等你泡到新妞了再打给我吧
in, like, ten minutes.
大概也就十分钟后的事
Or I could just call you on my actual wedding day.
或者在我婚礼当天打给你
Oh, cool!
那也行啊
Yeah, just call me 30 minutes
仪式前30分钟
before the service, and I'll be there.
打给我 我会准时到场的
Or better yet, call me at, like, your 50th wedding anniversary.
或者在你五十周年结婚纪念日打给我吧
Yeah, now that's hot.
你这样才迷人嘛
Max!
麦克斯
Johnny! I'm cold!
强尼 我好冷
Kiss good bye?
吻别吗
Seriously, guys, I can't feel my toes!
你们俩 我脚趾冻得没感觉了
See, it's hot again 'cause we broke up!
你看 我们一分手 又来电了
I'll see you at my 50th,
我的五十周年纪念见吧
If not before.
或在那之前也行
First the party, now this.
派对这么搞 现在又来
When I have a party, you won't be on the list.
哪天我办派对 绝对不邀请你
You're right. I deserve that.
你说得对 那是我应得的惩罚
No, I was doing a power move.
别啊 我打算办一个街舞派对
Please, I'm begging you to come.
求你了 你一定得来啊
we'll see.
再说吧
I might be a little too busy
到时候我可能没空
with my big, successful cupcake shop,
得忙我成功的小蛋糕店事业呢
So suck it.
所以你去死吧