多元一家人（2020）

也许你该信任你妈
Maybe you should give your mom the benefit of the doubt.
不 别扯我身上来 别把我刚说的话
No, don't take the thing that I just said you need to do
用在我身上 说我需要这么做
and then say that I need to do it.
但你确实需要这么做
But you do need to do it.
好吧 你注意到这事
Yeah, which you only noticed
只是因为我说了你需要这么做
because I told you that you need to do it.
这么说你承认自己需要这么做咯
Oh, so you're admitting you need to do it?
什么 不 我们之所以扯到我身上
W-- No, we're only talking about me needing to do it
是因为你需要先做
because you needed to do it first!
-我爱你 -我也爱你
- I love you. - ?Love you, too.
对了 祝你和新爹相处好运
Okay, good luck with your new dad.
谢了
Thanks!
祝你和被你偷走女儿的人相处愉快
Enjoy your day with the guy whose daughter you stole!
我们不能永远不理对方
We can't keep ignoring each other forever.
也许你不行
Maybe you can't.
顺便说一下 我们所有兄弟都站我这边
Incidentally, all of our brothers are on my side.
是啊 我看到推特投票了
Yeah, saw the Twitter poll.
"顺便"问一嘴 你打算把女儿丢给我多久
"Incidentally," how long are you planning on leaving your kid with me?
我不知道
I don't know.
我有三个孩子 玛塔只有一个爸
You know, I have three kids. Marta only has one dad.
听上去她应该主动向我投降才对
Sounds like she should be coming to me.
我听说你给了玛塔一些很糟糕的建议
I heard you gave Marta some terrible advice
把她的人生搞得一团糟
and messed up her life.
谁说的
Who said that?
丘伊说我们不能透露
Chuy said we can't say.
赶紧走 蠢货
Get the hell out of here, you bozos.
好吧
Okay.
-反正我们也要去见新客户 -没错
- We gotta go meet the new clients anyway. - Yeah.
为什么是他们去见新客户
Why are they meeting clients?
因为我不信任你
Because I don't trust you to do it.
你会偷走他们的孩子
You'll steal their children.
丘伊 得了吧
Chuy, come on.
吃甜甜圈
A doughnut?
家教真"好"
Great discipline.
话说 玛塔在你家能吃到绿色蔬菜吗
Hey, is Marta even getting any greens at your house?
对于一个看上去
For someone who doesn't seem to
不怎么在乎自己女儿的人来说
care about his daughter very much,
你太在乎你女儿了
you sure do care about your daughter.
你该跟她谈谈
You should talk to her.
为什么 她成负担了吗
Why? Is she being a problem?
知道吗 玛塔跟我说
You know, Marta told me
你从来没有问过她想要什么
you haven't once asked her what she wants to do.
她才15岁
She's 15.
我不用问她想做什么 我直接告诉她该干什么
I don't ask her what to do. I tell her what to do.
为什么 丘伊 她是个完美女儿
Why? Chuy, she's a dream.
是啊 她这么完美是因为我对她要求严格
Yeah, she's a dream because I'm hard on her.
你总批评我教育孩子有问题
You always criticize my parenting,
但你知道在这件事上我是对的
but you know I'm right about this.
不 你又错了
Nope. Wrong again.
你怎么能每次都错
How do you do it?
好吧 丘伊 那就记住
Okay, Chuy, just remember,
爸爸当年也是这么对我的
this is exactly how Dad dealt with me when...
在我像玛塔这么大时
...when I was Marta's age,
现在我们几乎都不说话了
and now we barely talk.
你也想这样吗
I mean, is that what you want?
也许爸不跟你说话
Maybe Dad barely talks to you
是因为你变成了现在这样
because of how you turned out.
你知道吗
You know what?
也许你女儿跟我住在一起还真是好事
Maybe it is better that your daughter lives with me!
很好 霸占我女儿吧 我不要她了
Good! Take my daughter! I'm done with her!
终于摆脱了
Good riddance!
你们也能看出来 我们是家族企业
Uh, as you can see, we're a family business.
你们做晚饭需要帮忙吗
Do you need help with dinner?
不用了 这就是晚饭
Nope. This is it.
我们通常只吃孩子吃剩下的
We usually just eat whatever the kids don't finish.
但是
But...
我能给你搞点
I could fix you
花生酱夹心饼干和太空冰淇淋
some peanut butter crackers and space ice cream.
抱歉 我们不习惯家里有个真正的人
Sorry, we're not used to having a real person here.
我明天去买♥♥食物
I'll go shopping tomorrow.
没关系 这也很有趣 像室内野营
That's okay. This is fun. It's like indoor camping.
"室内野营"
"Indoor camping."
这是个形容我们生活的好词
That's actually a nice way to describe our life.
没错 能解释那些被虫咬的包了
Yep, would explain all the bug bites.
我跟大卫度过了最美妙的时光
I had the best time with Dave.
我们一整天都在码头
We spent all day at the docks.
什么码头 丹佛是个内陆城市啊
What docks? We're in Denver.
那我就美得不知身在何方了
I guess I don't really know where I was.
好了 听着 妈
Okay, uh, listen, Mom,
我不想扫你的兴
I don't mean to harsh your buzz,
但你不觉得你和大卫进展有点快吗
but don't you think you and Dave are moving a little fast?
就是呢 棒不棒
I know. Isn't it great?
棒吗
Is it?
比尔 你♥爸♥爸去世后
Bill, when your dad left,
我一心想着怎么当好单亲妈妈
I-I was so focused on being a single mom,
从来没空恋爱
I never had time for love.
不 这我知道
No, I know. I know.
我只是不希望余生都盯着你
I-I-I just don't want to spend the rest of my life staring at you
而你却各种无视我有用的建议
while you ignore my helpful suggestions.
我想出去潇洒活一场
I want to go out and live.
那好吧 我为你开心
Well, you know, I guess I'm, uh, happy for you.
来点太空冰淇淋
Space ice cream?
不 我马上走
No, I'm not staying.
大卫和我刚洗了个鸳鸯澡
Dave and I just popped in for a quick co-shower.
妈 天呐 家里还有孩子呢 你能...
Mom! My God, the kids. Would you --
不不不 我们真的只是纯洁地洗澡 为了安全
Oh, no, no, no. It's -- It's -- It's purely for safety.
太潮会让大卫想起过去
Humidity gives Dave flashbacks.
想起他的假期吗
To his vacation?
我得走了
I've got to go.
大卫还有其他特别的安排
Dave has something extra special planned.
我都兴奋到起鸡皮疙瘩啦
I've got goose pimples.
你还好吧 比尔姑父
Are you okay, Uncle Bill?
什么 嗯 没事 我没事
Hmm? Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm fine.
虽然我妈可能会嫁给一个
No, uh, you know, my mom might legally bind herself
已经71岁 腰间还挂着链条钱包的人
to a 71-year-old with a chain wallet,
但我"不"觉得闹心
but I'm great.
你为什么站在这儿
Hey, why are you standing here?
因为现在我们家六个人共用一个洗手间
Oh, there's now one bathroom for six people.
抱歉我占用了那么久
Sorry that took so long.
桑迪和大卫好像把下水道给堵了
I think Sandy and Dave clogged the drain.
我们搬家吧 马上就搬
We're moving. Let's move.
如果你们允许的话 我要出去
So, if it's okay, I'm going out.
玩得开心
Have fun.
你要去哪儿
Uh, where are you going?
别告诉他 玛塔
Don't tell him, Marta.
比尔 这里不是丘伊家
Bill, this isn't Chuy's house.
我们信任家人 给予他们自♥由♥
We trust people here, and we give them freedom.
好吧 我们信任你 玛塔
Okay, well, we trust you, Marta,
但是 你知道你大概几点回来吗
but, uh, a-any idea when you'll be back?
9点吧
9:00?
很好 那到时见啦
Great. We will see you then.
那我现在可以出门了吗
So I can just... walk out now?
可以 玩得开心
Yeah. Have a great time.
或者玩得不开心
Or a bad time.
都由你做主
Your choice.
谢啦 姑姑
Wow. Thanks, Tía.
回见
See ya later.
好吧
Okay.
你确定你要这样养育青少年吗
Are you sure that's how you parent a teen?
不用等门 大卫要带我去跳伞
Don't wait up! Dave's taking me skydiving!