金色年代

The Goldbergs S03E20

Part 4 Dec. 8, 2019, 10:34 a.m.

可以学会玩"龙与地下城"
can learn how to play D&D,
其他超级肌肉男兄弟也一样可以
other super-shredded bros can, too.
没错我们有肌肉但我们玩不好这个游戏
I mean, sure, we're shredded, but we suck at this game.
亚当一直吼我们伤害我们的感情
Adam keeps yelling at us and hurting our feelings.
那是因为你们在水下混战中
That's 'cause you used a lightning-bolt spell
用闪电咒语像一帮菜鸟一样
in an underwater melee like a bunch of scrubs.
我们尽力了
We're trying our best.
我们只是没你那么厉害
We're just not good at it like you.
你知道这么差劲是什么感觉吗
Do you have any idea how it feels to -- to suck so bad?
我知道在我打篮球的时候
Actually, I do -- when I play basketball.
我不知道这个
I-I didn't know that.
对伙计抱歉
Yeah, man. Sorry.
好的大王甜甜教我们怎么取胜
All right. Lord Big of Tasty, teach us how to win.
我会的
I shall.
但首先
But first...
泰山压顶
coming off the top rope!
宝贝
Hey, boopie.
走开
Go away.
我是来为你父亲道歉的
Look, I wanted to apologize for your dad.
有些人就是不懂
Some people just don't understand
家长与孩子间的界限
the boundary between parent and child.
你吸指甲油吸嗨了吗
Are you high on nail polish?
我没上过大学
I never went to college.
这件事让我意识到
This whole thing has made me realize
我错过的所有毕竟
everything I missed out on, and at the end of the day,
我无法忍♥受你也错过这些
I couldn't bear it if you missed out on those things, too.
真的吗
Really?
相信我大学生活会非常棒的
Trust me, college is gonna be amazing.
我们会非常开心的
We are gonna have so much fun.
我的天太感...
Oh, my God. Thank you s--
慢着 "我们"
Wait. "We"?
对说来好笑
Yes. Crazy story.
我和老爷子一起看这部电影
I was watching this movie with Pops, and --
拜托别说是《回到学堂》
Please don't say "Back to School."
就是《回到学堂》我意识到我们也可以这样
It was "Back to School," And I realized that could be us.
不爸
No! Dad!
不管你正在家里哪里坐着或吃东西
Wherever you are sitting or eating in this house,
马上到我房♥间来
come to my room immediately.
紧急事件
It's an emergency.
我正坐着吃东西你叫我来最好理由充分
I was both sitting and eating, so this better be worth it.
我要和爱丽卡一起上卡内基梅隆大学
I'm going to Carnegie Mellon with Erica.
-不 -我们会做室友
- No. - We're gonna be roommates.
-不 -我们会偷偷带进
- No! - We're gonna sneak in
电炉煮面条汤
a hot plate to cook ramen soup.
-别想 -然后我们
- Never! - And then we're gonna
加入同一个女生联谊会
rush the same sorority.
这是噩梦
This is a nightmare.
我会是她的母亲兼姐妹
And I'll be her mother and her sister.
杀了我
Kill me.
她说得对贝弗莉
She's right, Beverly.
你完全疯了
You're acting nuts.
是谢谢
Yes. Thank you.
因为她显然不会去
'Cause she's obviously not going away at all.
爱丽卡会留在家做我的小花生
Erica's staying here and being my little peanut.
你们有什么毛病
What is wrong with you people?!
说真的完全不尊重我
Seriously, I get no respect!
一点尊重也没有
No respect.
罗德尼·丹泽祖也是这样说的
That's exactly what Rodney Dangerzone says.
《回到学堂》主演姓Dangerfield 直译为危险地带她记成危险地区了
瞧我们是同一队的
See? We are on the same team.
我们不是
No, we're not.
你们中要是有谁和我一队
If either of you were on my team,
就会听进去我的希望和梦想是什么
you would actually hear my hopes and dreams
不会夺走我的希望和梦想只考虑自己
and not try to take them away or make them about you.
算了吧
So just forget all of it.
我不上大学了
I won't go to college at all.
我想我们这次真的办砸了
I guess we both really blew it here, huh?
主要怪你
Mostly you.
我父母面对爱丽卡时
As my parents were facing off against Erica,
我们学校的体育馆将见证
our school gym's about to witness
一场千载难逢的对决
the face-off of a lifetime.
看来金伯格和他的笨蛋队友
Looks like Goldberg and his merry band of meatheads
没出现
are a no show.
恭喜了小伙子们
Congrats, boys.
你们赢得了芝士披萨
You just earned yourself a cheese pizza.
我曾经去过真正的地牢[地下城]
I have been in real dungeon.
但我们出现了准备好掷骰子了
But we did show -- ready to roll...some dice.
有人玩"龙与地下城"吗
Dungeons & Dragons, anyone?
随便游戏结束时
Whatever. By the end of this game,
你们不会知道你们握着的
you guys aren't gonna know what end
是大♥法♥师之杖的哪一头
of the Staff of the Magi you're holding.
如果你施困惑术
Well, if you're casting confusion,
大♥法♥师之杖给使用者
the Staff of the Magi gives the user a plus-two
在豁免对抗魔法时加两级所以祝你好运
on saves versus magic, so, uh, good luck with that.
他们掌握了我们的方法
They've learned our ways.
废话少说战斗开始
Enough talk. Let the battle begin.
伙计
Dude!
我施治疗轻伤术
I cast cure light wounds.
我拔出攻击之杖
I draw my Staff of Striking.
闪电术闪电术
Lightning bolt! Lightning bolt!
谢谢你位移斗篷
Thank you, cloak of displacement.
科比特你死了
Corbett, you're dead.
塔兹哥蛇怪把你变成石头了
Taz Money, the basilisk turns you to stone.
认栽吧
Face!
西若塔你出局了
Sirota, you're out.
拜托城主
Come on, DM.
这算什么裁决
What kind of call is that?
那一天最神奇的事发生了
That day, the most amazing thing happened.
不再是体育尖子生对抗菜鸟
It was no longer jocks versus scrubs.
我们是团结起来的班级因为我们有着同一信念
We were a class united in one belief --
那就是"龙与地下城"帅呆了
D&D was awesome.
这是所有体育课上举♥行♥过的最棒的比赛
It was the greatest game ever played in any gym class,
我们爱死了
and we loved it.
除了梅勒教练
Except for Coach Mellor,
他不知道游戏会持续四小时
who didn't realize it would last four hours.
现在是晚上6点半了我只想过回正常的生活
It's 6:30 P.M. I just want my life back.
到最后只剩两个人了
In the end, two were left standing --
我和我背叛的朋友
me and the friend I betrayed.
我们的"龙与地下城"游戏要结束了
Our D&D game was ending,
只差最后一步
and with one last move,
我就会成为体育课英雄
I would become a gym-class hero.
好了金巴巴你把手伸向灵魂宝石
All right, Goldfarb, you reach the soul gem,
你发现黏胶立方怪正慢慢渗向你
you find a gelatinous cube slowly oozing towards you.
拿走宝石
Take the gem.
结束战斗金伯格
Finish it up, Goldberg.
简单得很
Easy lay-up.
来吧背叛者结束吧
Go ahead, Betrayer. End it.
别这个样子
Don't act like that.
我和兄弟们赢的光明正大
Me and my boys won this fair and square.
胜利不是重点
It's not about winning, man.
"龙与地下城"是我们擅长的
D&D was the one thing we were good at,
而现在
and now...
你把这个也夺走了
you took that away, too.
拿走宝石快点赢得比赛吧
Take the gem and win the game already.
拜托
Please.
我举起剑
I raise my sword...
扔到一边
...and toss it aside
飞身跳向黏胶立方怪
and swan-dive directly into the gelatinous cube.
亚当不
Adam, no!
-什么你疯了吗 -不
- What? Are you crazy? - No, no.
所有人闭嘴