前夫总动员（2011）

The Exes S02E02

Part 4 March 18, 2021, 1:18 p.m.

I thought you were a really nice guy.
我说真的可你让这个疯子好友
I mean, you send over your psycho wing woman
- 来和我炫耀你的尺寸? - 不是那样
- to brag about your size? - No. No, no, no.
你真的以为那就是一个女人想要的吗?
And you really think that's what women want?
我已经不知道我们还想要啥了!
I don't know what we want anymore!
好吧我知道我要的是什么离开这儿
Well, I know what I want. To get out of here.
- 苏珊不要走... - 苏珊...
- No, Susan-- - Susan--
不要那样看着我斯图尔特
Don't look at me like that, Stuart.
笑一个?
Smile on?
好吧让我来理一下头绪
Okay, let me get this straight.
你和一个成年女性开门见山的说
You looked a grown woman dead in the face
我引用你的原话"他有很大的..."
and said--and I quote-- "He has a huge--"
我知道我说啥了! 都是你的错
I know what I said! It's all your fault.
是你说他不可能成功和人滚床单
You're the one who said that he would never
除非人家知道了他的尺寸
get anywhere with women unless they knew what he had.
你去暗示她行不?和她建议建议
You imply it, okay? You suggest it.
你怎么可以这样开门见山的抛话!
You don't take it out and smack her over the head with it!
天啊斯图尔特
Stuart, oh, my God,
我真心对不起你
I'm sorry from the bottom of my heart.
我其实... 我是想帮你的
I real-- I was just trying to help.
不敢相信你们竟然和她说了这事
I can't believe you guys told her.
我把桑拿房♥当成很神圣的地方
I thought the sauna was a sacred place.
不是的是她和我们说在浴室看到你
No, she told us she saw you in the bathroom
撞到刚洗完澡的你
getting out of the shower.
而我们只是去桑拿房♥验证一下而已
We only went to the sauna to verify it.
请允许我说一句先生强大
And may I say, sir, bravo.
听我说我知道我做错了
Look, I know, I really screwed up,
但是希望没有给你带来麻烦
but please don't let it stop you from getting out there.
没有没有一点都没有
No, no, it didn't.
在你把苏珊吓跑后我又追上了她
After you scared Susan off, I tracked her down.
我和她道歉了然后我们聊天开怀大笑
I apologized, and we talked, laughed,
我带她去喝咖啡
and I took her out for coffee.
哦很好啊
Oh, good for you.
你竟然带她去喝咖啡了
You took her out for coffee.
是啊...
Yeah...
然后呢我们就上♥床♥了!
Right after we had sex!
- 宝贝勇者归来 - 是啊勇者归来!
- I'm back, baby. - Yeah, you are!
仔细琢磨琢磨
You know, if you think about it,
要不是我大嘴巴
if I hadn't opened my big mouth
然后搞得你们很尴尬
and completely embarrassed you,
你就不会出去追她
you never would have chased her down
也不会向她解释我的不合理行为
and bonded over how completely inappropriate I was.
所以我觉得我应该来句
So I guess what I'm trying to say is,
不用谢
you're welcome.
哇哦你真心有胆
Wow, you've got balls.
看来我们有新领袖了
I think we have a new leader.