前夫总动员（2011）
The Exes
第二季
剧集 | 前夫总动员（2011） | 导航列表
前夫总动员（2011）
The Exes S02E02
Part 1
March 18, 2021, 1:18 p.m.
晚上好啊 哈斯克 今儿过的如何?
Good evening, Haskell.How was your day?
挺欢快 小花生
It was delightful...Peanut.
哇 太窝心了
Aw, that's so cute.
我前妻和我也一直用爱称
You know, my ex-wife and I used to have
我习惯叫她
pet names for each other.I used to call her--
我是问你要不要吃花生 二货
I was offering you a peanut, you freak.
坐吧!
Sit down!
别别别别坐那儿 那是菲尔的位子
Uh-uh-uh-uh, not there.That's Phil's seat.
他为什么每次都要坐那里?
How come he always gets to sit there?
这是王座 他就是王(原意为犬群领袖)
It's the power seat, and he's the pack leader.
拉你的雪橇
Now, put your head down, pull the sled,
然后跟我们一样祈祷着有点渣渣吃吧
and pray for scraps like the rest of us.
-我来了 - 国王驾到
- Hey. - Oh, oh, the king is here.
陛下 请上座
Sire, your chair awaits.
虽然不知发生什么事了
I don't know what went down before I got here,
但你恭维我喜欢
but I'm liking your attitude.
发生什么事了?
What's going on?
-伙计们 - 晚上好 霍莉
- Hey, you guys. - Hi, holly.
哇 辣鸡翅 啊啊啊啊
Ooh, hot wings.Aah-aah...Oh!
放手 哈斯克
Put down the wing, Hask--
放手 放手
Put it down! Put it down!
不凑巧这刚好是我晚饭 我要饿昏了
This happens to be my dinner.I'm starving.
霍莉 你都拿垃圾食品当晚饭了?
Holly, you're eating bar food for dinner?
本来还没觉得 你这一句话
Well, you know, it didn't seem that pathetic
瞬间把我变悲剧了
until I heard it out loud.
我是个高薪离婚律师好不好?
I'm a very high-paid divorce attorney, okay?
我哪有那个国际时间做饭买♥♥菜
I don't have time to shop and cook.
你就有时间咀嚼吞咽?
You got time to chew and swallow?
她回来了
Oh, she's back.
- 谁回来了 - 啥? 谁?
- Who's back? - What? Who?
我心仪的女人
This woman I've had my eye on.
喔 哪个?
Oh, which one?
穿黑裙子的那个金发妞
The blonde with the black dress.
哦 长得挺正
Oh, okay now, she's pretty.
- 品味不错 斯图尔特 - 谢了
- That's some good taste, Stuart. - Thank you. Thank you.
我当初发誓要是再遇到她
And I promised myself the next time I saw her,
我就去搭讪
I was gonna make my move.
上吧伙计 拿下她
All right, you go, man. Go get her!
- 我迫不及待想围观 - 他没行动啊
- I can't wait. - He's not moving.
他干嘛不动?
Why is he not moving?
那啥 还是下次吧
You know, maybe next time.
什么?
What?
斯图尔特
You know, Stuart,
我们在离婚后的确有段重返花丛的瓶颈期
we all had a rough time dating after our divorces.
我说的'我们'是指哈斯克
And by "we," I mean Haskell.
但是我们还是能夜夜风流
But we eventually slept with dozens of women.
这里的'我们' 我是说菲尔
And by "we," I mean Phil.
好吧 自从我离了婚
Yeah, well, since my divorce,
我一点感情经历都没有
I haven't even gotten on the scoreboard.
我也想走出低谷期
I'm trying to get back out there,
但却老被人拒绝
but I keep getting shot down.
哪儿来自信给我找
And that's not exactly a confidence builder.
亲爱的
Sweetie...
找女人不难
Picking up women isn't rocket science.
我来给你演示演示
I'm gonna show you how it's done.
不 你们
No, no. You guys...
女人不想听男人甜言蜜语 出言轻薄
Women do not want cheesy lines and sleazy innuendo.
女人想要的是被对方理解和倾听
I mean, we want to be listened to and understood.
我们要的是聪明 敏感 体贴的男人
We want a man who is smart and sensitive and caring.
才怪 那是女人以为自己想要的
No, that's what women think they want.
说白了 你们女人就是想要个
When it comes down to it,you want a man
骑在自己身上做运动的男人
who's gonna put it on you.
你们就想要个能让自己高♥潮♥迭起的男人
You want a man who's gonna take you there.
你们就是想找个男人滚床单而已
You want a man with a little bit of x7fbow-chicka-wow-wow.
不 别听他们的斯图尔特
Well, okay, no-- Don't listen to them, Stuart.
过来 过来 听好
Come here. Come here, listen.
女人都欣赏有魅力的男人 懂吗?
Women are attracted to what's between the ears, okay?
你只要表现出平时的体贴 聪明 机敏就行
Just go be your sweet, smart, sensitive self.
好了好了 谢了 霍莉 我会的
Okay. All right. Thanks, holly, I will.
但是 我可不会盲目出击
But...I don't plan on going in unarmed.
笑一个
Smile on.
笑一个 跑一个
Smile on, women off.
他们勾搭上了
Oh, he's talking to her.
情势不错 别看 不要看
That's good. Don't look. Don't look.
她微微一笑 她咧嘴一笑
She's smiling. She's laughing.
这妞姐喜欢 她起身了
Oh, I like her. Oh, she's getting up.
等等 她要走了 坐下来 死女人!
Wait, she's leaving. Sit down, you bitch!
遗憾啊 伙计 又搞砸一次
Sorry, buddy. You struck out again, huh?
不全是
Not entirely.
她说我可以在脸谱上跟她互粉
She said to "friend" her on Facebook.
恭喜你啊
Oh, congratulations.
你都跟她玩上过家家了
You got to eighth grade with her.
前夫总动员 第二季第二集
斯图尔特 我要饿死了
Oh, Stuart, I'm starving.
看上去很好吃嘛
Oh, those look great.
放下我的鸡蛋 只能看不能吃的感觉如何?
Drop the eggs! How's it feel?
拿吧 吃吧 是你的了
Take it. Take it! Take it.
霍莉 你真是不可理喻
Holly, this is ridiculous.
你光靠酒吧的食物和残羹冷炙来过日子
You can't live on bar food and table scraps.
你得学会自己做饭
You need to learn how to cook.
明天 我来教你怎么做
Tomorrow, I'm gonna teach you how to make
- 家常便饭 - 好啊 好主意
- some quick, simple meals. - Okay, sounds good.
哈斯克 那块培根你还吃么?
Haskell, you gonna eat that bacon?
明知故问
We both know that's not a question.
行了 斯图尔特 浴室我用完了
All right, Stuart, bathroom's all yours.
抱歉耽搁了这么久 但不得不承认...
Sorry it took so long, but let's face it...
还是值得的
It was worth it.
今早上你就在那靓妹的公♥寓♥里洗澡了
you'd be showering at that beautiful baby's apartment.
才怪 亲爱的 你没错
Uh-uh, honey, you did fine.
你这可不是在帮他
You're not helping him.
如果他想和辣妞搭讪
If he wants to talk to hot chicks,
他得找回他当年的威风劲儿
he has to learn how to get his swagger back.
嗯 我知道 他需要找个滚船单的
Yeah, I know, he needs some chitty-chitty-boom-boom.
是滚床单
It's bow-chicka-wow-wow.
这词儿被你毁了
And you just ruined it for me.
嗯 我想我知道女人的需求
Well, I think I know what women want,
她们喜欢有魅力的男人(脑中有货)
and it's what's between the ears.
"在...之间"这个词用的还算正确
You got the between part right.
听着...
Listen...
我知道我在说什么
I think I know what I'm talking about.
女人才懂女人不是么
I'm the lady here.
要命
Oh, boys..
好吧 那就明天十点
All right, so tomorrow at 10:00,
你要为罗斯一家办理离婚事宜
you have the Rosen divorce,
十一点还要去做个口供
and a deposition at 11:00.
午餐时间 我们一起去纹个
And for lunch we're gonna get
'行者无疆'的刺青
matching "Keep on Truckin'" tramp stamps.
听起来不错
Sounds great.
霍莉 你到底有没有在听我说话?
Holly, are you even listening to me?
抱歉 你说什么?
Sorry, what?
你寻思什么呢?
What is with you?
整个早晨你都心不在焉的
You have been distracted all morning.
- 没有 没什么 - 有 你老走神
- No, I haven't. - Yes, you have.
一定发生什么事 告诉我 告诉我
Something is going on. Tell me, tell me,
- 告诉我 告诉我 - 没什么事
- tell me, tell me. - Nothing is going on.
不 有事 告诉我 告诉我
Yes, it is. Tell me. Tell me.
你不告诉我我就没完
I'm not stopping until you tell me,
告诉我 告诉我 告诉我 告诉我
tell me, tell me, tell me, tell me, tell me--
嘘! 好吧 我说还不行么
Shh! All right, I'll tell you.
今天早上 我在那些家伙的公♥寓♥里
So this morning, I'm at the guys' apartment,
然后我走进浴室
前夫总动员（2011）
The Exes
剧集 | 前夫总动员（2011） | 导航列表