如果还有明天（2010）

The Big C S01E10

Part 2 Aug. 17, 2021, 10:22 p.m.

I know you're fucking that painter man.
没错我知道很多事情
Yeah. I know a lot of things.
例如你自命不凡生活放荡
That you're a self-righteous slut.
例如你的儿子是个刻薄鬼
That your son's a judgmental asshole.
例如我受够了你那门蹩脚的课
And that I'm through with your sorry-ass class
和这个二流学校
and this whole sorry-ass fucking school.
安德莉亚
Andrea.
该死
Shit.
老兄再给我来一小杯
How 'bout another little splash there, chief?
请美女喝一杯如何
Hey, buy a lady a drink?
当然可是美女在哪里
Show me a lady, and I might.
去你的保小罗
Oh-ho. Fuck you, Pauly.
给美女也来一杯
One for the lady.
这阵子都没在球场上看到你
I haven't seen you around the rugby field in a while.
该不会是我把你吓跑了吧
I hope I didn't scare you away.
才怪
Nah.
我只不过是韧带有一些拉伤
Just a little ligament damage, you know.
对一流运动员来说是家常便饭
Very common injury in elite athletes.
这还不够
On top of that,
我人生其余的事也他妈的一团糟
the rest of my life complete fucking clusterfuck.
同命相怜啊
Ugh, join the club.
上个星期我的猫被诊断出白血病
Last week, my cat was diagnosed with feline leukemia.
接着昨天我在和客户视频聊天时
And then yesterday I dropped my iPhone into the toilet
爱疯手♥机♥落进了马桶里
while I was video-chatting with a client.
但愿信♥号♥♥中断得及时
And I hope that video fried out
没有让他偷♥拍♥到我的那个部位
before he got a potty shot of my pooter.
你还好吧
Are you okay?
我要和凯西离婚了
Cathy and I are getting a divorce.
真抱歉
Mm, sorry.
我知道你们最近不太和睦
I know you guys were having problems.
我早该料到会这样
Should have seen it coming.
这一阵子我都感觉不对劲
You know, I knew something was up for a while,
但又说不清到底怎么了
but I couldn't figure out what it was.
直到几天前你猜怎么着
And then, a couple days ago, get this.
我在自家后院撞见她
I catch her in our own backyard
和一个男人亲热
fucking some guy.
好家伙
Holy shit.
真为你难过保小罗
I'm so sorry, Pauly.
谢谢你蒂娜真的
Thank you, Tina. I mean it.
能够有人听我倾诉为我排解
It actually feels really good to talk about. You know,
这样的感觉真好你明白吗
to tell someone and have them listen, you know?
我明白
Yeah, I do.
去他的凯西这是她的损失
Anyway, screw Cathy. It's her loss.
我提议喝个痛快让你彻底忘掉她
I say we drink until we get her off your mind.
"她"是谁不认识
Get who off my mind?
为单身新贵保小罗♥干♥杯
To a newly single Pauly.
顶
Hell, yeah.
让我再见识一下你的骚劲
Tell me more about how bad you are.
我现在没心情
I'm not in the mood.
凯西浇灭了我所有的欲望
Cathy has zapped my libido.
那个臭娘们
Oh, that bitch!
她对你做了什么
What does that mean?
她对咱俩的关系充满怨念
She hates the fact that I'm seeing you,
我可以理解
and I get it.
我和她都二十年没见了
I haven't seen her for 20 years,
结果我一出现就开始
and I show up, and I start
和她弟弟鬼混
doing whatever we're doing,
我以前就做过这种事情
and I've done this kind of thing before.
和谁她只有我一个弟弟
With who? I'm her only brother.
如果我们能少一点炮♥友♥关系
If we could just make this less just about the sex,
我会感觉好一些
I'd feel better.
我们可以慢慢培养我们的友谊
We could nurture our friendship,
这样也许我还能和她重归于好
and then maybe I could repair my friendship with her.
那好吧行
All right, fine.
反正提起我老姐就已经够让我性趣大失了
Talking about my sister has made me lose my semi anyway.
那么
So, um,
我觉得爱疯手♥机♥是当今社会的新型钻石
I think iPhones are the new diamonds.
男人们送女人电子产品还觉得很浪漫
Guys give women electronics now for romantic occasions,
这让人感觉很可耻
and it's kind of a shame.
送礼物这件事本身就很可耻
Gift-giving in general is kind of a shame.
至少我们可以把裤子脱了再聊这些吧
Can we at least talk about this with our pants off?
不好意思
I'm sorry.
我在找杰克逊一家
I'm looking for the Jackson residence.
这里就是有什么事吗
Well, this is it. Can I help you?
我是凯瑟琳·贾米森安德莉亚的老师
I'm Andrea's teacher, Cathy Jamison.
很高兴见到您
Oh, it's so nice to meet you.
我是安德莉亚的妈妈多萝西
I'm Dorothy, Andrea's mother.
安德莉亚成天把您挂在嘴边
Andrea's told us so much about you.
她也经常和我讲您的事情
She's told me a lot about you too.
她特别崇拜您
Well, she absolutely adores you.
还说您是她最喜欢的老师
Says you're her favorite teacher.
来吧快进来
Well, here, come on in.
谢谢
Thank you.
多诺万来客人了
Donovan! We have company.
我在厨房♥呢亲爱的
I'm in the kitchen, hon.
真香在做什么呢
Mmm, smells good in there. What is it?
牛排
Making steak.
多诺万亲爱的这是凯西
Donovan, honey, this is Cathy,
就是安德莉亚经常提起的那位老师
the teacher Andrea's always telling us about.
这是安德莉亚的爸爸
This is Andrea's dad.
那您就是她的继父喽
So you're her stepdad?
不是亲生父亲
No. The real deal.
安德莉亚是我们六个孩子中的老小
Andrea's our last of six.
我肯定是把她跟另外一个学生搞混了
I-I must have been thinking about another student.
安德莉亚不停地说您有多么多么好
You know, Andrea sure does go on about you.
她夸大其词了
Well, she exaggerates.
她去参加暑期班
Well, she sure wasn't real happy
确实不怎么开心
to be taking summer school.
说那是痴呆学校
Called it retard school.
她有时候说话还真不过脑子
Oh, she can be crass, that one.
但是她坚持下来了学习也大有起色
But she stuck with it and really turned things around.
我们以前也觉得很头疼
We've had our trouble with her.
她是我们教育方式的挑战
She's our academic challenge.
我们尝试了各种办法
Mm-hmm. We tried everything.
孩子怎么说都是心头肉
But you can't love 'em smart.
那安德莉亚在家吗
So is Andrea here?
她刚刚出去
Oh, you just missed her.
她去街尾教堂了
She's down the street at the church.
今天唱诗班排练
At choir practice.
小姑娘们唱起歌♥来就像百灵鸟
Baby girl sings like a bird.
我十八岁的时候
Um, when I was 18,
有一次乘坐一趟国际航♥班♥
I was on an international flight,
我给一个完全陌生的人
and I gave a blow job
吹♥箫♥了
to a complete stranger.
-你骗我的吧 -不是
- Are you shitting me? - No.
好了好了该你了
Okay, okay, okay. Your turn.
艳遇还是囧事说吧
A sexy or embarrassing story. Go.
我不觉得这件事会让我脸上贴金
I don't think this paints me in a very flattering light.
但是凯西和我度蜜月的时候
But when Cathy and I were going on our honeymoon,
我特想去趟法国南部
I wanted to go to the south of France
因为我盘算着那里也许会有几个天体海滩
'cause I was hoping there might be some topless beaches there.
什么
What?
你才新婚燕尔
You're newly married
就想着去看其他美女的咪♥咪♥
and you want to look at other girls' tits?
我是"咪♥咪♥爱好者" 怎么了吧
I'm a tit man. Sue me.
太有意思了
Ah, this is fun.
和你聊天真轻松
You're easy to talk to.
我爱死你的故事了
I-I like your stories.
好吧我其实只有十五个左右
Yeah. Well, I actually only have about 15 of them.
再说半个小时我就招人烦了
You got me for another half hour, and then I get boring.
我不再把担子扛在肩*