太空部队（2020）

我在月球表面转了转
and I walked around on the surface of the moon.
就是这些事
So, stuff like that.
好的
Okay.
不拍手吗？
We're not clapping?
如果你没有故事要讲 也不用编
If you don't have a story, you don't have to make one up.
我没编
Oh, I didn't make that up.
我知道听起来很离谱 但我确实登上过月球
I know it sounds wild. But I actually went to the moon.
她没说谎
She's not lying.
她不光登上过月球 而且是第一位登月的黑人女性
She's been on the moon. Not only that, she was the first-ever Black woman on the moon.
如果这不如吃“潘木瓜”有意思 我很遗憾
I'm sorry if that's not as riveting as eating a "pa-pay-yaysh."
恐怕大家并不明白 容我说几句
I don't think everybody understands what's going on here. If I may, okay.
这位女性是英雄
This woman right here is a hero.
这个房♥间里每一位最令人激动的事
The most exciting thing everybody will be talking about in this room
应该是曾如此接近 这位登上过月球的女性
is that they were sitting close to the woman that was on the moon.
来吧
Here we go.
对 英雄
Yeah. Hero.
谢谢
Thanks. That was sweet.
先生 你做过什么？
Sir, what have you done?
我？2018年 我被票选为最性感的媒体顾问
Me? Well, I was voted hottest media consultant in 2018.
厉害 好的 -谢谢
Nice. All right. -Thank you.
虽然掌声没那么热烈 但也没事
Seems not as much applause but that's all right.
我可以在两周内 将这个房♥间任何一个人变成网红
I can basically turn anybody in this room into an influencer in under two weeks.
再来一轮掌声 -好的
I'll take one more round of applause. -Okay.
不 这是你能为别人做的事
No. And that's what you can do for other people.
你为你自己做了什么？
What… What have you done? For you?
嗯
Yeah.
我有一次 从我家屋顶跳进了邻居家的泳池
I once jumped off my roof into my neighbor's pool.
不错！这可厉害了！
Good for you! And that's bigger than you think.
你拿好这个 戴上 很好
Let's have you hold that. Put those on. And great.
很好
Great.
我不拿这个
I'm not holding this.
你是科学家 不是吗？ -是的 但我不是提线木偶
Oh. You're a scientist, aren't you? -Yes, but I'm not a Muppet.
旁边这位倒是愿意的
The other guy said he'd do it.
他是提线木偶
He is a Muppet.
内尔德在吗？他去哪儿了？
Is Naird here? Where is he?
天哪！我找不到指挥官了
Oh my God. I've lost the commanding officer.
布拉德 冷静一点 你最后一次见他是在哪里？
Brad, calm down. Where did you last see him?
我之前跟在他后面 他生气了
Well, I was walking on his back,
然后就进了厕所 但现在他不在厕所
he got mad, then he went to the restroom, but he's not there.
马克？是你吗？
Mark? Is that you?
马克 你没事吧？你在哪里？
Mark, are you okay? Where are you?
我…
I'm…
他好像说夏威夷
It sounded like he said Hawaii.
他在夏威夷 这是你应得的 长官
He's in Hawaii. You earned it, sir.
马克 待在原地 我们会来找到你
Mark, just stay where you are. We'll come and find you.
快
Go, go, go, go. Go, go, go, go.
肾结石？我怎么会有肾结石呢？
Kidney stone? How did I get a kidney stone?
可能是因为饮食不健康 但多数与压力有关
Could be bad diet, but most are stress-related.
不是因为压力 压力就是早餐上的小菜一碟
Well, it's not stress. I eat stress for breakfast.
对 再加上大量的肉 而且他还在办离婚
Yeah, along with huge portions of meat. He's also going through a divorce.
与此无关
It has nothing to do with that.
马克 如果你不是压力这么大
Mark, if you weren't wound so tight,
你的输尿管里就不会有大石头
there wouldn't be a boulder in your ureter.
好的 医生 那怎么办呢？
Okay, Doc, so what's the story? What do I do from here?
通常就是多喝水 把结石排出来
Well, normally, you would just drink plenty of fluids and then pass the stone.
但你的结石特别大
But, in your case, the stone is unusually big.
我们得做输尿管镜手术 可能会极为痛苦
We need to do a ureteroscopy, which can be extremely painful.
好吧
Ooh. Okay.
我很建议打一针吗♥啡♥
I highly recommend a shot of morphine.
不要 不要 我不打吗♥啡♥
No, no, no, no, no. I'm not doing morphine.
打吗♥啡♥吧 马克
Take the morphine, Mark.
不要 小孩才打吗♥啡♥
No, morphine is for babies.
那种舒爽的感觉可好了
I'll take some of that "nirvana nectar."
我听不到树叶沙沙的响声
I can't… I can't hear the leaves rustling.
我在用力摇 好吗？我又不是风
Well, I'm trying, okay? I'm not the wind.
天哪！我想念树
Oh God. I miss trees.
我能停了吗？我的胳膊累了
Can I please stop? My arms are tired.
好的
Okay, yes. All right. Yes.
谢谢你这么配合我
Thank… Thank you. Thank you for indulging me.
我现在不想自杀了
Uh, I… I don't feel like, uh, killing myself anymore.
这多亏了你 艾琳
And it's all thanks to you, Erin.
你之前想着要自杀？
But you were thinking of doing that?
现在不想了
Not anymore.
但我跟你说 你很重要 艾琳
But I'll tell you something. You matter, Erin.
地球很重要
The Earth matters.
找时间抱抱树
Find time to hug a tree,
下下水
dip a toe into a lake.
一言为定？
Will you promise?
好的
Okay.
我该回去工作了
I guess I should get back to work.
对了 艾琳
Oh, Erin? Erin?
我跟你说一件事
I'll tell you something.
在这里
Up here,
眼泪会飘起来
tears float.
就像小球似的
Like little globes.
咸度与海水一样
The same salinity as the sea.
我想你 地球
I miss you, Earth.
我得去抓眼泪了
I should go catch that tear
免得把生命保障设备短路了 到时候我就得窒息了
before it shorts out the life support, and I asphyxiate.
再见！
Uh… Bye!
正在寻找输尿管
Looking for the ureter.
找到了 上
There it is. -Up we go.
哇！这是将军的尿道？
Oh wow. That's the general's urinary track?
没错
Tract, yes,
请不要用油腻的手指触摸监视器
and please refrain from touching the monitor with your greasy fingers.
我要看
Ah! I wanna see it.
布拉德 把你得手♥机♥屏幕图像投到我的手♥机♥上
Brad, AirPlay the screen from your phone to mine.
好的
Okay.
行吗？
Did it work?
没有 没传过来 你传去哪里了啊 布拉德？
No. It's not coming through. Where are you sending this, Brad?
拜托！ -这是什么？
Oh! Come on, man! -What is that?
好像是你♥爸♥在叫 不会就是我想的那样吧？
It sounds like your father screaming. Is that what I think it is?
没错 是一颗肾结石穿过尿道
That's a kidney stone making its way through the urinary tract.
拜托！没有！
Come on, man. It's not there.
我看得很清楚
I'm seeing it fine.
我不看了 太恐怖了
I can't watch. That's every guy's worst nightmare.
怎么了？
What's happening?
阿德里安 握住我的手！
Whoa. Oh my gosh. -Adrian, hold my hand!
快出来了！ -好的 加油 爸！
It's almost through! Okay, come on, Dad!
快了
So close.
出来了
It's coming out.
神啊！ -我松了一口气
Oh my God. -Oh, I'm so relieved.
真他… -你没事吧？
Oh, fu… -You all right?
能让我看一下吗？
Can I see it?
喂？
Hello?
陈博士 我是太空探索技术公♥司♥的凯瑟琳
Dr. Chan. It's Catherine from SpaceX.
很希望你能加入我们团队
We'd love for you to join the team.
真的？
Really?
太好了 你给马洛里博士打过电♥话♥了吗？
That's great! Uh, did you call Dr. Mallory?
没有 我们只招你 不招马洛里博士
Uh, no, we're just offering the job to you, not Dr. Mallory.
我们觉得你更适合我们的企业文化
We felt your energy is a better culture fit for our office.
好的
Okay. Um…
我再给你回电♥话♥ 好吗？ -好的
Can I call you back? -Yes.
妈的
Oh shit.
好的 我们去拍照吧
All right, let's go take that photo.
我的后排兄弟
My back-row buddy.
好的 大家打起精神面对镜头
All right, everybody looking sharp, straight down the lens.
想想我们最喜欢的星座 数到三
Thinking about our favorite constellation.
一 二 三
On three. One, two, three.
《时代》太空部队
耗费巨万 是否值得？