人生切割术（2022）

你是谁
Who are you?
你是谁
Who are you?
有人吗
Hello?
抱歉 我太心急了
I'm sorry, I got ahead of myself.
你好啊 桌上那位
Hi there, you on the table.
不知道你愿不愿意做个简单的问卷调查
I wonder if you'd mind taking a brief survey.
你是谁啊
Who is that?
有五个问题
Five questions.
听着 我知道你很困
Now, I know you're sleepy,
但我肯定这会令你神清气爽
but I just bet it'll make you feel right as rain.
是谁在说话
Who's speaking?
天啊
God.
嘿 开门
Hey! Open the door!
等你做完问卷调查后 我很乐意聊一聊
I'd be just thrilled to chat once we've run the survey.
我们开始第一个问题吧
Shall we begin with question one?
我才不做你的问卷调查呢
I'm not taking your survey.
我们开始第一个问题吧
Shall we begin with question one?
让我出去
Let me out of here.
嘿
Hey!
开门
Open the door!
该死的
Fuck.
嘿 让我出去
Hey! Let me out!
嘿
Hey.
你好
Hello.
五个问题
Five questions?
五个问题
Five questions.
最后我能得到什么
What do I get at the end?
那要看你怎么回答了
Depends on your answers.
好吧
Okay.
太好了 我们开始吧
Great. Off we go.
首先 你是谁
Now to start, who are you?
这就是第一个问题
That's the first question?
只说名字就好
First name will do.
我不…
I don't…
没关系
It's okay.
如果你回答不出这个问题 可以说：“未知”
If you can't answer the question, feel free to say, "unknown."
这算什么
What is this?
好 未知
Okay, unknown.
第二个问题 你出生在美国的哪个州或领地
Question two, in which US state or territory were you born?
- 等等 - 请问是哪个州或领地
- Wait. - Which state or territory, please?
- 我不知道 - 未知
- I don't know. - Unknown.
第三个问题 请说出任意一个美国州或领地的名字
Question three, please name any US state or territory.
- 该死 我… - 说最先想到的就行
- Fuck. I-- - First that comes to mind.
- 不知道 特拉华州 这算什么 - 特拉华州
- I don't know. Delaware. What is this? - Delaware.
第四个问题 伊根先生最喜欢吃什么早餐
Question four, what is Mr. Eagan's favorite breakfast?
我不知…这个问题毫无意义啊
I don't-- That one makes no sense.
是吗 未知 第五个问题
Right? Unknown. Question five.
提醒一下 这是你最后一个问题
And as a reminder, this is the final question.
请你尽量回忆
To the best of your memory,
你母亲的眼睛是什么颜色
what is or was the color of your mother's eyes?
好吧 这是怎么回事
Okay, what's hap-- What's happening?
未知
Unknown.
那么答案是未知 未知 特拉华州 未知 未知
So that's unknown, unknown, Delaware, unknown, unknown.
你对我做了些什么
What the hell did you do to me?
你的回答是满分
That's a perfect score.
（卢蒙 马克斯科特 分离层通行证）
你准备好见斯科特先生了吗
Are you ready for Mr. Scout?
谢谢
Thank you.
请进吧
Go ahead.
（分离层入口）
斯科特先生
Mr. Scout.
嗨 贾德
Hi, Judd.
- 好了 晚上见 - 好 回头见
- All right, see you this evening. - Yep, see you soon.
（马克S 阿伦敦）
- 你有口臭 - 抱歉
- You're breathing shitty. - Sorry.
生病了
You sick?
也许吧 佩蒂昨天一直在流鼻涕
Maybe. Petey was sniffling yesterday.
如果你冲着我呼气 我就把你喉咙扯烂
If you breathe on me, I'll rip your larynx out.
天啊 这么极端
Wow. That went right to ten.
我觉得扯烂我满是细菌的喉咙
I feel like ripping out my germ-ridden larynx
比我冲着你呼气 会让你病得更重
would get you sicker than just me breathing on you.
不 内啡肽
Nah. Endorphins.
佩蒂最好今天别请假 因为我马上就要
Petey better not be out for the day, 'cause I'm about zero seconds
完成塔姆沃特那个文件了 他得去处理
from wrapping the Tumwater file, and he needs to process it.
我觉得他请假了
I think he's out.
（德伦斯维尔）
如果他今天不处理 他们要到下周星期二才能知道了
If he doesn't process today, they won't know until Tuesday of next week.
- 典型的卢蒙作派 - 说话小心点 伙计
- It's typical Lumon bullshit. - Careful, guy.
嗨 孩子们 晚饭吃什么
Hi, kids. What's for dinner?
该死的 欧文 我们警告过你
Goddamn it, Irv. We warned you.
关于问候语吗 你们在开玩笑
About the greeting? You were kidding.
不 我们真的很讨厌这句话 我们给了你多少个理由
No, we sincerely hate it. How many reasons did we come up with?
- 八个 - 八个理由
- Eight. - Eight reasons.
主要理由是有潜在的居高临下感
Chief among them the latent condescension.
而且令人困惑 这种情况下 是孩子们给你做晚饭吗 还是…
And it's confusing. Like, did the kids make you dinner in this scenario? Or--
是啊 你这爸当得也太烂了
Yeah. What kind of a shit dad are you?
- 佩蒂没来 - 我们认为他病了
- No Petey? - We think he's sick.
不 迪伦今天要完成塔姆沃特的文件
No. And Dylan's about to wrap Tumwater today.
是啊 如果他看不到我完成
Yeah, and if he doesn't see me finish,
我可能就评不上季度最佳精检员了
I might get passed over for refiner of the quarter
那样我会错过该死的华夫饼派对
and miss out on my goddamn waffle party.
抱怨吧…这些员工奖励越来越离谱了
Grumble, grumble. These perks are so out of hand.
想当年我们处理完一份文件
When we'd process a file in the old days,
他们只会和我们握手 把奶精加满
they'd shake our hand and fill up the creamer.
我还是不信他们真会拿奶精当奖励
I still don't buy they actually incentivized creamer.
是真的 当年我们对此感恩戴德呢
They did. And back then, we were grateful for it.
这太糟糕了 哥们
That's fucked, dude.
是 非常糟糕
Yes, very fucked.
努力工作一天却没有儿童早餐当回报
To put in an honest day's work and not get a children's breakfast in return.
欧文今天火气很大
Irv's got claws today.
早上好 宏观数据精检部
Good morning, Macrodata Refinement.
嗨 米尔奇克先生
Hi, Mr. Milchick.
马克 能跟你谈谈吗
Mark, could I have a word?
（宏观数据精检部）
你上次见到科贝尔女士时 是在她之前的办公室
Last time you saw Ms. Cobel, she was in her old office.
现在她搬去了新的办公室
Now she's in her new office.
那是个完全不同的办公室
It's a completely different office.
你找我什么事
What's this about?
她从来不会这么说
She'd never say so,
但我知道夸一下她的办公室 能让她开心一整天
but I know a compliment about the office would just make her day.
（行政部）
马克 请进 把门关上
Mark? Come in. Shut the thing.
办公室不错啊
Nice office.
糟透了
It's horrid.
是 旧的办公室更好
Yeah, the old one was better.
你气色真差 看上去是宿醉
You look awful. You look hungover.
请坐吧
Have a seat.
董事会将通过连线和我们一起开会
The Board will be joining us remotely today.
马克S在我办公桌前了
I have Mark S. at my desk.
你好 你…
Hello. You--
我猜这是要讨论我今天代理部门主管的事
I assume this is about me acting as department chief today.
好吧 我的意思是
Okay. Well… I mean,
我之前替佩蒂顶过班 应该没问题的
I've subbed for Petey before, so it shouldn't be that big a thing.
佩蒂已经从公♥司♥离职了
Petey is no longer with this company.
你说什么
I'm sorry?
我说佩蒂已经从公♥司♥离职了
I said, Petey is no longer with this company.
我很遗憾 马克 我在公♥司♥里最喜欢你们这对朋友了
I'm sorry, Mark. You guys were one of my favorite office friendships.
总该有个通知吧 怎么回事
I mean, there should have been some notice of this. What happened?
我们很想告诉你
We'd love to tell you,
但是很不幸 保密协议不允许
but unfortunately, non-disclosure policy forbids.
我们告诉你就等于是帮你窥探佩蒂的隐私
We'd be aiding an assault on Petey's privacy by you.
马克 你能把门卡放在我桌上吗
Mark, would you place your key card on my desk?
马克S 我现在给你为基尔服务的机会
Mark S., at this time I confer upon you the freedom to serve Kier