红粉日记：索扎达姐妹（2023）

Secrets & Sisterhood: The Sozahdahs S01E06

Part 2 Aug. 18, 2023, 12:34 p.m.

不,它更能接受如何 - 不。- 她接受了。我把它放在桌子上。
No, it was more accepting of how-- No. - She accepted it. I laid it on the table.
我基本上是—— 我把它放在桌子上的原因
I was basically-- And the reason I laid it on the table
是因为我从来不想把它扔回我的脸上。
is because I never wanted that thrown back in my face.
周杰伦沉迷于毒品,
Jay was addicted to pharmaceuticals,
我沉迷于他。
and I was addicted to him.
最难的是,我还爱著他
The hardest thing was that I was still in love with him
当我提出离婚时。
when I filed for divorce.
非常爱。但我想—— 艾莉博士:你在保护自己。
Very much in love. But I'm like-- DR. ALLY: You were protecting yourself.
我 - 我不得不。
I-- I had to.
那时,你可以说,就像,我的光消失了。
At that time, you could just tell, like, my light was gone.
我一直在努力让他活下来,然后,你知道,给他注入生命,
And I kept trying to survive him and then, you know, breathe life into him,
它只是吸走了我的生命。
and it just sucked the life out of me.
我接过他,我说,“不,我救你。”
And I took him and I was like, "No, I'ma save you."
因为你值得拯救。
Because you're worth saving.
他值得拯救。
And he was worth saving.
艾莉博士:那么你现在的情绪是什么？
DR. ALLY: So what are your emotions about now?
只是为了看看我和他从哪里来
Just to see where I came from with him
以及我和他一起经历的一切。
and just everything I went through with him.
看到我现在和他在一起的东西,就像,我很感激,我很感激。
To see what I have with him now is just, like, I'm thankful, I'm grateful.
我——我希望并祈祷
I-- I hoped and I prayed
他会以我爱上的人的身份回来。
that he'd come back as the person I fell in love with.
但我不知道这是否真的会发生。
But I didn't know if it was actually going to happen.
你现在的感受是什么？
What are your feelings right now?
坚持下去。
Stick with 'em.
呃,只是看到她伤心。
Uh, just seeing her sad.
我受伤只是因为我相信,就像,她会和我一起度过难关,
I was hurt just because I believe, like, she was gonna ride it out with me,
就像骑或死。-嗯。
like ride or die. - Mmm.
乔希:所以当她刚刚——她只是弹跳！
JOSH: So when she just-- She just bounced!
我向家人隐瞒了这些问题。
I was hiding the issues, uh, from my family.
哦,好的。- 我的家人看到我减肥
Oh, okay. - My family saw me losing the weight
“因为我感到尴尬和羞愧。
'cause I was embarrassed and ashamed.
我想,“这是我丈夫,但他在这里吃药。
I'm like, "This is my husband, but he's over here popping pills.
我现在很痛苦。
I'm miserable right now." - Yeah.
到了他如此糟糕的地步,
To where it got to a point where he was so bad,
大家都看到了。我当时想,“我出去了！
everyone saw it. I was like, "I'm out!"
我不是想把任何人扔到公共汽车下面,
I'm not trying to throw anyone under the bus,
我不得不说的是她和她的姐♥妹♥们♥,
that I will have to say is her and her sisters,
他们倾诉自己的不安全感,就像,在彼此身上,
they pour out their insecurities, like, out on each other,
所以然后它开始他们的头。
so then it starts with their heads.
好。所以这听起来像是边界。
Okay. So what that sounds like is boundaries.
都是模糊的界限。
It's all blurred lines.
这是因为我和我的姐♥妹♥们♥,我们是彼此最好的朋友。
It's 'cause my sisters and I, we're each other's best friends.
自然而然地,就像你们被彼此的生活吞没了一样。
Naturally, it's like you become engulfed in each other's lives.
我被抚养长大,就像,你知道,孩子是被看到的,而不是被听到的。
I was raised as, like, children are, you know, to be seen, not heard.
我们永远不够好。
We were never good enough.
艾莉博士:但是当涉及到药物滥用方面,
DR. ALLY: But when it comes to substance abuse stuff,
你接受治疗了吗？
did you get treatment?
这只是你自己做的事情,还是——
Was it just something you just did on your own or was it--
我打了底部。
I hit bottom.
所以我的问题是,你如何维持它？
So my question is, how are you sustaining it?
现在,我确实非常保护他
And now, I do get very protective of him
“因为我想,我从来没有,永远不想看到他经历
'cause I'm like, I never ever, ever want to see him go through
他又经历了什么。
what he went through again.
我看到你们两个联♥系♥很紧密,
I see the two of you are very connected,
保持联♥系♥很重要,
and it's important to be connected,
但对你来说,拥有也很重要
but it's also important for you to have
你自己独特的观点和理解。
your own separate perspectives and understandings.
你们都没结婚那么久。
Y'all haven't been married that-- that long.
你们仍然在互相学习很多。
You're still learning a lot about each other.
我认为有一件事我想要
And I think there's one thing that I would like
你们两个分开做,
the two of you to do separately,
是日记。
is journal.
为了保持他一直健康的清醒,
In order to maintain the healthy sobriety that he's been at,
我们想给他空间
we wanna allow him the space
维持对他重要的关系
to maintain the relationships that are important to him
并做对他来说重要的事情。
and to do the things that are important to him.
好吧,那你对此有何感想？
All right, so how do you feel about that?
我认为这是一个绝妙的主意。
I think that's a wonderful idea.
我对他如此严格的很多原因
A lot of the reason why I'm so strict on him
因为我不希望他重复他重复的任何其他错误
is because I don't want him repeating any of the other mistakes he's repeated
他身边有坏人。
with having bad people around him.
所以我同意艾莉博士的观点。
So I agree with Dr. Ally.
我有作业要做。
I have homework to do.
我会按照我的条件稍微放松一下缰绳。
I will loosen the reins a little bit on my terms.
我会让他出去的
I will let him go out
并在所有土地上度过最美好的时光
and have the greatest time in all of the land
和我和我的姐♥妹♥们♥。
with my sisters and I.
然后一旦发生这种情况并且他通过了这些测试,
And then once that happens and he passes those tests,
然后他可以冒险去做自己的事情。
then he can venture out and do his own thing.
但是你现在走路之前必须爬行。
But you gotta crawl before you walk now.
记得
Remember,
你们都不是敌人。
y'all aren't the enemy.
敌人是通信模式。
The enemy is the communication pattern.
是的！我真的很欣赏你的观点。
Yes! I really appreciate your perspective.
♪ Let's make this last all night ♪
♪ When we wake up ♪
♪ Put some makeup... ♪
嘿。你好吗？
Hey. How are you?
好。你好吗？
Good. How are you?
很高兴见到你,宝贝。- 很高兴见到你,宝贝。
Good to see you, baby. - Good to see you, baby.
我的姐♥妹♥们♥在海滩上冲我的方式真的伤害了我。
The way that my sisters came at me at the beach really hurt me.
我不是一个退缩的人,
I'm not one to back down,
但我觉得我真的需要听他们说出来。
but I felt like I really need to hear them out.
我已经准备好继续前进了。
I'm ready to move forward.
我真的很期待
And I'm really looking forward
和姐♥妹♥们♥一起度过姐妹之夜,
to having a sisters' night out with my sisters,
只是为了我们可以像姐妹一样出去玩。
just so that we can hang out as sisters.
我不想总是扮演老板。
I don't always wanna have to play boss.
女服务员:嗨,女士们。嗨！
WAITRESS: Hi, ladies. Hi!
非常感谢。女服务员:当然。
Thank you so much. WAITRESS: Of course.
谢谢你点我的饮料。我为你订购了。
Thanks for ordering my drink. I ordered for you.
我,嗯...
I, um...
无论如何,我只想办理入住手续就知道
Anyways, I wanted just to check-in to know
你知道我在想你。
that you knew that I was thinking about you.
我们很幸运,甚至拥有我们家人之间的爱。
We're lucky to even have the love that we have between our family.
人们甚至没有体验到这一点,对吧？- 他们没有。
People don't get to even experience that, right? - They don't.
这就是为什么我想,你知道,我们做这个筹款活动,
And that's why I want, you know, us to do this fundraiser,
而且——你知道,为了妈妈。
and-- and you know, for Mom.
但是还有很多工作要做。- 嗯嗯。
But there's a lot of work that needs to be done. - Mm-hmm.
上次筹款活动给你放了很多。-是的。
A lot was put on you the last fundraiser. - Yeah.
我真的很想确保我们分配任务
And I really wanna make sure we divvy up the tasks
在其他兄弟姐妹中。
amongst the other siblings.
我只是不想,就像,有人试图控制。
I just don't want, like, someone trying to take control.
席德为这个慈善机构做出了巨大贡献
Sid has contributed immensely to this charity
她的所作所为值得称赞。
and deserves credit for what she's done.
但我不知道姐♥妹♥们♥是否真的明白
But I don't know if my sisters really understand
我参加慈善晚会背后的原因以及这对我意味著什么
my reasoning behind the charity gala and what this means to me
与我所经历的一切。
with all that I've gone through.
有时候,我需要,你知道,筹款人,
Sometimes, it takes me being, you know, the fundraiser-zilla,
这样他们就可以完成工作。
so that they get their job done.
那是处♥女♥吗？-是的。
Is that a virgin? - It is.
有什么想告诉我的吗？
Is there something you wanna tell me?
我的意思是,比如,发生了什么？
I mean, like, what is going on?
有什么我想告诉你的吗？
Is there something I wanna tell you?
这是因为你没有喝酒。
It's 'cause you're not drinking.
我总是震惊得像,哇！
I'm always shocked like, whoa!
我希望我告诉你一些事情。
I wish there was something that I was telling you.
哇,哇,哇！好的,坚持住。
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Okay, hold on.
所以我们基本上是——我们有我们的事业,
So we're basically-- We have our careers,
为自己感到骄傲,也为你感到骄傲。
very proud of ourselves, and very proud of you as well.
是的,特别是,比如,我们来自哪里。
Yeah, especially, like, where we've come from.
我觉得对我来说,真的,下一步是现在,