瑞克和莫蒂（2013）

Wait, what? Are you setting up a series of them?
相信我 关键就在于 要用主题关联分类
Trust me! The key is grouping them with thematic connections.
我得跟莫蒂单独谈谈
I just want to talk to Morty in private,
－谈一些完全无关的事 －对 我们马上就回来
about something unrelated. We’ll be right back.
好吧 或许我不该找他来
Okay, this guy might have been kind of a mistake.
－他很强硬 －他在仗势欺人
He’s really, like, aggressive. He’s steamrolling us.
他还以为自己在主持短片节目
He thinks he’s hosting a fucking clip show.
－而且我不喜欢他的声音 －我不喜欢他的声音
And I don’t like his voice. - I don’t like his voice.
我不喜欢他开玩笑
I don’t like that he’s doing jokes,
－我不喜欢他对你不敬的口气 －谢谢
I don’t like that he’s talking down to you. Thank you.
好 我们得再想想办法
Okay. Let’s rethink this.
我还是不相信这些纪录 但我愿意承认这些集点卡
I still don’t trust these, but I’ll accept these cards
－但我承认的比例是七成 －好 还算合理
at 70 cents on the dollar. - Done. Fair.
－我们要怎么甩掉他 －没事
How do we get rid of him?
我会付钱给那个混♥蛋♥ 说他做得很好
I’ll just pay the asshole and tell him he did a great job.
他还以为自己在主持短片节目
He thinks he’s hosting a fucking clip show.
－而且我不喜欢他的声音 －我不喜欢他的声音
And I don’t like his voice. - I don’t like his voice.
我不喜欢他开玩笑…
I don’t like that he’s doing jokes
好吧 是我们不对
Okay, well, that’s... - I don’t like that...
－我们应该要预见到这个结果 －观察是我的工作
that’s on us. Should have seen that coming. Seeing is more my thing.
那你就知道他要付钱给你
Well, then you know he’s about to pay you.
然后跟我说我＂做得很好＂吗
And "tell me I did a great job"?
好吧 被你抓包了 我们其实觉得你烂透了
Fine! You caught us. We secretly think you suck.
我准备了两倍该给你的钱
Here’s twice what I owe you, that’s how little conversation
我们就是这么不想为此多谈 请你离开吧
we want to have about you leaving.
你们两个是我看过最机车的人
I have never seen two bigger assholes!
－而且各种机车的人我都看得到 －那请你快点离开
And I see all assholes! - Then you can see yours out.
再见
Bye.
天啊
Christ.
天啊 好烫 烫死我了
Shit! Hot, so hot.
得从中间吃才对 这里的温度通常是最低的
Gotta start in the middle, statistically the coolest.
我的餐盘上 绝对不会有碳水化合物 莫蒂
You won’t find a carb on my plate, Morty.
－我要确实执行生酮饮食 －糟糕
I’m all about that keto. - No!
－那是…是不是该死的… －短片
Is that a fucking... - Clip?
我爱脂肪 把所有脂肪都给我
I’m a fats man. Gimme all the fats!
那个卷饼明明就是碳水化合物
That burrito looks pretty carby!
真是够了
This fucking guy.
你想到的招竟然是羞辱别人的饮食
That’s your move? Diet shaming?
你就认输吧 这样太丢脸
Just take the L, man! This is embarrassing.
我来让你看看真正丢脸的事
I’ll show you embarrassing!
快 莫蒂 只有这样才能拯救宇宙
Do it, Morty! It’s the only way to save the universe!
怎么会 怎么可能
How? How is it the only way?
莫蒂 我要死了 拜托你了
Morty, I’m dying! It’s up to you.
瑞克
Rick!
你在搞什么鬼
What the hell are you doing?
我在拯救宇宙 应该吧
Saving the universe! I think!
对吗 瑞克
Right, Rick?
（咸味瑞克酒吧）
（莫蒂赌注）
（把舌头伸进猿博格的鼻孔）
－太厉害了 －去死吧 莫蒂
This guy's nuts! - Screw you, Morty.
搞什么鬼 你还跟我说我是英雄
What the hell? You told me I was a hero!
你那天晚上确实是英雄
You were that night.
怎么回事
What the hell’s going on?
那个生气的石头是在播短片吗
Is that angry stone playing... video-clips?
那是外公花钱 请来证明我是坏人的怪人
It’s some weirdo Grandpa hired to prove I’m a bad person.
原来会接那种工作的人并不好相处
Turns out people that take that job aren’t fun to be around.
请你离开
Get out of here!
人行道是公共空间 兄弟
Sidewalk’s public property, bro!
我可以在这里尽情观察
I can observe all I want from here!
这不是我们的问题 爸 请你让这吵闹的东西消失
This isn’t our problem, Dad. Please make this loud thing go away.
对啊 我正在准备考试
I was studying for a test.
不 你才没有
No, you weren’t!
该死的石头混帐
Fucking rock asshole.
这下好了
Now you’ve done it!
我要用他们羞辱我的方式来羞辱你们
As they’ve shamed me, so shall I now shame you!
妈 你是在里面喝葡萄酒吗
Mom? Are you drinking wine in there?
不是 我在拉屎
No! I’m shitting.
少来了 我听得出马桶盖移♥动♥的声音
Bitch, I know the sound of a toilet lid moving.
－天啊 －一石二鸟
Two birds, one stone.
比较丢脸的是妈
More embarrassing for Mom than me.
我没有说谎 我确实正要拉屎
I wasn’t lying, I was going to shit.
怎么回事
What’s going on here?
有宇宙物种正出于恶意 播放丢脸的短片吗
Cosmic being playing embarrassing clips out of spite?
天啊 杰瑞 你完全说对了
Damn, Jerry. Nailed it.
我刚刚就从楼上的窗户看到了
I was watching from the upstairs window.
看看这个吧 废物
Well, watch this, loser!
莫蒂 我在丢前几次探险的东西
Morty, I’m throwing out some stuff from our last couple adventures,
这钻石你还用得到吗
you got any use for this diamond?
不用了 谢谢
Nope. I’m good.
不会有事的
This is gonna be fine.
对不起 我开始尿之后就停不下来了
I’m sorry! I can’t stop once I start!
没差 大家都知道我很丢脸 我什么都不怕
Whatever! Everyone knows I’m embarrassing, I’m bulletproof.
天啊 太可悲了
Oh my God, this is so sad.
你看完这个短片之后会更可悲
Not as sad as you after this!
＂性感尤物捕捉者＂的魔爪
The so called "Hottie Snatchers"
已经伸到了加拿大与墨西哥
have spread to Canada and Mexico,
抓走最有魅力的当地居民
grabbing the most attractive residents
并将其带到某处去
and taking them god knows where.
相关单位建议所有美国人待在室内
All Americans, even sub-sevens,
就算长相不到七分也一样
are advised to stay indoors.
你到户外绝对会有危险
You certainly wouldn’t be safe out there.
直播时别闹 麦可
Not on the air, Michael.
我去上一下厕所
BRB, bathroom.
我得知道
I need to know!
别担心 那说法不是真的 那东西只是随机抓人而已
It’s okay, It’s not real! They’re just doing it at random!
没什么事吧 我听说…
Is everything okay? I heard a...
你也是啊
You too?
其实习惯之后也没那么糟
It’s not so bad once you get used to it.
你没必要这样对我 我只是走下楼来而已
I don’t deserve this, I just walked downstairs.
好吧 如果爸不打算出手
Okay, well if Dad’s just gonna stand here,
我是不是该做点什么
should I do something?
除非这样会让我…
Unless that somehow tees me up.
你落入了圈套
Walked right into it!
这就是我们的目标 双叉丹尼尔…
This is our target, Dichotomus Daniel.
是椅子的声音
That was my chair.
是我放了屁
It was a fart.
鸟人一直都知道
Birdperson always knows.
没错 他的喙很灵敏
It’s true! He’s got that beak!
快滚吧 你这废物
Get lost, you piece of shit!
为什么 好让你能做这种事吗
Why? So you can do stuff like this?
莫蒂 我们唯一的出路
Morty! I’m afraid the only way out
就在这个巨型鲸鱼精♥液♥缸的底部
is through the bottom of this massive vat of whale semen.
最后这段短片就只是为了制♥造♥话题
Well, that last one was just for shock value.
去死吧
Fuck this guy!
无法承受后果就不要惹到我
If you can’t take the heat, get out of the watching'!
你…你烂透了
You suck!
你播这些怪东西
Showing weird shit
就因为我们不想让你 把我们的生命当成短片节目
just cuz we wouldn’t let you treat our lives like a clip show!
－很好 上吧 莫蒂 －打趴他 老弟
Get him Morty! - Mess him up, little bro!
怎样 你要学那个尿尿人教训我吗
What? You gonna beat me up like the piss guy?
喂 这样不对
Hey! Not cool!
你快准备我教训你的短片吧
Why don’t you tee up this clip of me kicking your ass!
我变成一堆石头了
I’m all rocks now!
我没预见到会变成这样
I never saw this coming...
该死
Shit!
这种家伙会死吗
These guys can die?
我还以为这是宇宙物种
I thought they were cosmic.
我建议把这东西留在路上不管
You know what? I say we leave this thing in the street,
否认自己有参与 希望风头能尽快过去
deny any involvement and just hope this blows over.
除非他们在 原本就有偏见的陪审团面前
Unless, of course, they play this exact clip on a screen in front of a jury
用萤幕播放这个短片
with some kind of built-in bias.