糟糕历史：油炸叔精选版（2011）

Mad? I'm absolutely furious.
求你了 陛下必须知道自己出问题了
Please, His Majesty must see that he's not well.
我觉得我颜色不太对
I suppose I have been a bit off-colour.
看他的尿液
As has his wee-wee.
亮紫色的
Bright purple.
是的 谢谢
Yes, thank you.
它真的是紫色的
我认为应当让受过专业训练的医生
I think we'll leave the diagnosis and treatment
进行诊断并做出治疗
to those of us trained in the medical profession.
科学才是最后的灵药
Only science can provide the solution.
科学和芥末酱
Science and mustard!
芥末酱 这想法不错
Mustard! What a good idea!
我是条香肠 咝咝呼哧的香肠
I'm a sausage! Sizzle, sizzle, sizzle!
显然这一点用都没有
That's clearly not working.
我们试试另一种乔治王朝式治疗法吧
We'll try another Georgian cure.
真棒 是什么
Splendid, what's that?
我不会用科学蒙蔽您的双眼
I'm not going to blind you with science,
只会用这又红又烫的铁烙敲你一下
just assault you with this red-hot poker.
乔治的御医真的试了这些"疗法"
其实真的很简单 我们只要等到
It's quite simple, really. We just wait
水泡出现然后破掉
for a blister to appear and then pop!
这真的能治愈他吗
Is this really supposed to cure him?
是的 对他大喊大叫也行
Yes, that and shouting at him.
别发疯了
Stop being mad!
快好起来
Get better!
我们乔治御医在治疗这种疾病上
We Georgian doctors have made great strides
实现了重大突破 快好起来
in the treatment of this affliction. Get better!
我们不是应该给他开点药吗
Shouldn't we be giving him some sort of medicine?
我已经开了
I already have.
一次一勺砒霜 每天两次
He's on a spoonful of arsenic, twice a day.
砒霜
Arsenic?
是的 和其他食物混合服用
Yes, mixed in with some other stuff.
但砒霜是剧毒 你会让他更糟的
But arsenic is highly poisonous, you're going to make him worse!
更糟 你是想说我堂堂国王御医
Worse? Are you trying to tell me that I, the King's own physician,
在让国王的病情加重吗
am making the King worse?
-你疯了吗 -什么疯了
-Are you insane. - Insane?
因为如果你疯了 我会连你一起治疗
Because if you are insane, I shall have to treat you, too.
让我来帮你治疗他吧
Why don't I help you treat him!
好的 你听好
Yes... You!
-别疯了 -快好起来
- Stop being mad! - Get better!
-成熟点吧 -别老是疯疯癫癫的
- Grow up! - Don't act weird all the time!
别再疯了
Just stop it!
乔治三世病情加重后 无法再打理社稷
When George III's illness worsened, he could no longer rule
所以他的儿子便成了摄政王
and so his son was made Regent, or acting King.
但是威尔士王子讨厌生活在父亲的阴影下
But the Prince of Wales hated living in his father's shadow.
乔治四世摄政王*
*I'm George IV, the Regent King
代理执政气不壮*
*Which means I was just standing in
代父监国只因他*
*Acting King because my dad
疯头疯脑老呆瓜*
*George III had gone barking mad
香蕉蕉
Banana!
宫殿设计我专长*
*Great palaces I did design
白金汉宫添荣光*
*Buckingham was one of mine
推崇艺术与时尚*
*Art and fashion, I'm so rated
才智呢
And wise?
那个说来就话长*
*That's more complicated
女演员和女公爵*
*Actresses and duchesses
一生挚爱求若渴*
*The great loves of my life
爱人要比派还多*
*I loved more girls than I ate pies
就是难忍♥我老婆*
*But I couldn't stand my wife
他受不了他老婆*
*He couldn't stand his wife
走开
Go away.
被迫迎娶卡洛琳*
*I only married Queen Caroline
债台高筑有内情*
*When my debts began to climb
答应婚事有条件*
*Because if I agreed to tie the knot
他的债务我还清*
*I said I'd pay off the lot
婚礼引发冲突多*
*But the wedding caused all sorts of strife
有妇之夫就是我*
*Because I already had a wife
那人还是离过婚的天主教♥徒♥*
*A divorced Catholic
唯闻父叹息*
*Dad did sigh
又老又疯偏不死*
*But the mad old goat just wouldn't die
还活着呢 糟糕 话说太早*
*Still here! Oh, spoke too soon
我终于可以单飞了
At last, I can go solo!
终登王位初掌权*
*As true King, my reign began
但已老迈误华年*
*Though I was now older than your nan
一国之主已登基*
*And as the ruler of our nation
加冕典礼禁吾妻*
*I banned my wife from my coronation
幡然醒悟我恨她*
*And knowing now that I did hate her
三周之后死掉啦*
*She promptly died just three weeks later
可惜吃派吃太多*
*But all those pies that I got through
只有十年享快活*
*Meant ten years later I died, too
你好 我们见过吗 我是只袋鼠
Hello, have we met? I'm a kangaroo!
女演员和女公爵*
*Actresses and duchesses
一生挚爱求若渴*
*The great loves of my life
爱人要比派还多*
*I loved more girls than I ate pies
就是难忍♥我老婆*
*But I couldn't stand my wife
掌控王位仅十年*
*I had just ten years on the throne
你可曾记得*
*Do you remember that
不 你记得的只是*
*No, all that you remember is
我是个胖子*
*I was really fat
绝妙古希腊
大部分人认为亚历山大大帝是希腊人
Most people think of Alexander the Great as a Greek,
但严格意义上来说 他是马其顿人
but, technically, he was Macedonian.
事实上 他应该
In fact, he should really
被叫做马其顿大帝亚历山大三世
be called Alexander the Third of Macedon.
但这名字显然不好记
But that simply isn't memorable
而亚历山大很想被世人铭记
and Alexander definitely wanted to be remembered.
亚历山大 我们要如何命名这座新城市
So, what shall we call this new city, Oh, Alexander?
土耳其 公元前330年
-抱歉 亚历山大大帝 -这才对
- Oh, sorry. Oh, Alexander the Great. - Yeah.
我觉得应该叫它
I think we should call it...
亚历山大城 以我们伟大的领袖命名
Alexandria - after our great and powerful leader.
他在哪 他在哪 他在哪
Where is he? Where is he? Where is he?
就在你眼前
There he is!
您沿希腊到印度建立了一系列的城市
Well, you have founded a whole chain of cities, from Greece to India.
的确
Indeed, I have.
您把它命名为亚历山大城
And you named this one Alexandria.
您把这座也命名为亚历山大城 对吧
You named this one Alexandria, didn't you?
这里也是亚历山大城
Then there's Alexandria...
是的 别忘了这边的亚历山大城
Yeah, OK. Let's not forget Alexandria.
不会的 但问题来了
No. Well, that's the thing,
我觉得这样会很让人困惑
I think it might be getting a bit confusing, don't you?
我们可以根据其他人命名这座新城吗
Could we perhaps name this new one after someone else?
我是从古至今以来最棒的军事领导者
OK. I am the greatest military commander that ever lived.
已知的世界都已被我征服
I have conquered the known world
而我年仅26岁
and I am barely 26 years old.
等你自己建立了一座城市
Perhaps when you found your own city,
你也可以用你的名字命名
you can name it after yourself.
你可以叫它 排骨精城
You can call it, hmm... Skinnymandria.
但既然它们是我建立的
But since I'm founding them,
我就要叫它
I'd like to call it...
亚历山大城
Alexandria.
好吗
Ok?
遵命
Yes, sir.
话说回来 说不定你是对的
No, actually, do you know what? Perhaps you're right.
伟大的军事领导者也会听从军师的建议
A great military ruler also listens to his advisers.
这的确有点让人困惑
It is getting a bit confusing.
我们应该叫它伊斯肯德伦
I think we should call it Iskenderun.
为什么是伊斯肯德伦
Why Iskenderun?
这是土耳其语啊
It's Turkish!
-是土耳其语的亚历山大吗 -是的
- Is it Turkish for Alexandria? - Yes!
-我想也是 -没错
- I thought so. - OK.
亚历山大的扩张使得他深入印度中心
Alexander's conquests took him deep into India,
他在那里面对的