飞出个未来（1999）

《飞出个未来》
(吃吧!单身狗粮) (现推出口味!)
(老妈牌老式机器人润滑油)
(集体催眠时间)
(单身狗粮)
(老妈牌友善机器人公♥司♥)
很壮观,是不是?
Spectacular, isn't it?
大概吧,这是什么?
Probably! What is it?
我打造了整个宇宙的模拟世界!
I've created a simulation of the entire universe!
这样的话,那很糟
Oh! In that case, it stinks.
我一直忘记,教授 我们是在整个宇宙吗?
I keep forgetting, Professor Are we in the entire universe?.
喔,当然是
Why, naturally!
好消息,各位!我们有货要运送
Good news, everyone!We've got a delivery!
但首先来点名!
But first, roll call!
莉拉? -有
Leela? - Here.
弗莱? -到
Fry? - Present!
邋遢鬼 -有
Scruffy? ...Yep.
赫米斯 -到
Hermes?Check.
班德 -看我的闪亮金属像素
Bender?Bite my shiny middle pixel!
艾米 -在
Amy?Shmobviously.
还有其他人
And the rest.
我是团队中的无名氏
Hooray!I'm an unnamed member of the group!
太厉害了,教授 这模拟怎么能做得这么烂?
That's amazing, Professor!How'd you make it so crummy?
这可不容易
It wasn't easy.
就算要达到这种程度的真实感
Even to achieve this level of realism
都需要大量的计算能力
requires vast amounts of computing power.
我的辛普创 比一百个灭蚊灯的用电量还多
My Simputron uses more electricity than 100 bug zappers.
(辛普创)
这让我想起,我要拔掉灭蚊灯的插头
Which reminds me, I had to unplug our bug zappers.
打到了
Ow! - Got him!
蚊子还活着
The mosquito is still alive.
有蚊子吗?
There's a mosquito?
听着,各位
Listen up, threeple!
今天你们要把这包裹送到太空义大利
Today, you'll be delivering this package to Space Italy.
太空义大利?
Space Italy?
我知道,取名称这么偷懒很丢脸
I know, it's an embarrassingly lazy name.
但你在从头创造整个宇宙时
But, when you're creating an entire universe from scratch,
无法为所有东西编造可信的名称
you can't make up a believable name for everything.
有时你就是必须取 「太空义大利」或「机器人星球」
Sometimes, you just have to go with "Space Italy"or "the Robot Planet"
或「佐艾伯格医生」这种名称
or "Dr. Zoidberg."
荒谬至极
Preposterous.
太空义大利! 班德,你去送那个包裹吧?
Wow, Space Italy!You delivering that package, Bender?
要我爬那楼梯?敬谢不敏
Up all those steps? No grazie.
我就投进特雷维喷泉许愿
I'll just chuck it into Trevi Fountain for good luck.
爸爸咪呀,撞到太空教宗了!
Papa pia! He hit-a the Space Pope!
你因为打伤教宗而被捕
You're under arrest for-a bonking His Holiness.
我就说吧,这家行星快递真的很不入流
I tell-a you,this-a Planet Express companyis a real two-bit operation, eh?
至少有三流!
More like three!
既然我们来了,要游览一下景点吗?
So, um, as long as we're here,wanna see the sights?
来到太空罗马时...
When in Space Rome...
米开朗基罗的《大卫像》 真是栩栩如生
Michelangelo's David!So lifelike!
大卫,下面好歹遮一下
Jeez, Dave! Get a fig leaf!
啦啦啦
? La la la! ?
啦啦啦
? La la la! ?
我就是不懂为何它不会倒
I just can't understand how it doesn't fall dow...
我来拉你一把
Lemme give you a han...
天啊,他们俩如胶似漆的
Oh, mama, they're going at it like two packs of gum!
班德,给我们一点隐私
Bender, give us a little privacy.
所以在这砂锅里的人 知道自己身在模拟世界吗?
So, do those people in the casseroleknow they're in a simulation,
还是他们以为自己是真实的?
or do they think that they're real?
他们当然以为自己是真实的
Of course they think they're real.
对他们来说 我软体中的法则就是他们的物理定律
To them, the rules of my software are just their laws of physics.
但我们也认为自己是真实的
But, we think we're real.
我们的宇宙有没有可能是模拟的?
Couldn't our universe also be a simulation?
绝对不是,不可能
Absolutely not! No chance.
这想法本身就很荒谬
The very idea is preposterous!
你怎么能这么确定?
How can you be so sure?
因为从计算角度来看就不可能
Because it's computationally impossible!
例如,每个小东西移♥动♥时 宇宙中的每个原子
For example, every atom in the universe
都会受到影响
is affected whenever one little thing moves.
例如我的屁♥股♥?
Like my ass?
对!来吧
Oh yeah! Come on!
那是很完美的例子,班德 电臀舞跳得挺不错
That's a perfect example, Bender,and some pretty decent twerking.
我的软体不可能计算班德的屁♥股♥
My software can't possibly compute the gravitational changes
和其他所有粒子之间的重力变化
between Bender's ass and every other particle,
所以我必须让资讯
so I had to have the information
以固定的速度逐渐向外传播
travel outward gradually,at a fixed speed.
就像我们宇宙的光速?
Like the speed of light in our universe?
对!
Right!
那只是巧合
Oh, fuff. That's just a coincidence.
我必须抄捷径
I had to cut other corners, too.
我是说,我的模拟 甚至无法准确追踪所有东西的位置
I mean, my simulation doesn't even keep track of exactly where everything is.
接受所有赌注 猜猜球在哪个杯子里,猜中就不打你
Taking all bets!Find the ball, win me not punching you!
我用最后五元赌一号♥杯,我下十元好了
My last $5 on cup number one!In fact, make it my last $10!
又一个合宜的例子
Another convenient example.
我那偷懒的软体 根本不会判断球在哪个杯子里
My lazy software wouldn't even decide which cup the ball's in
直到有人实际打开看
until someone actually looked at it.
在打开看前,两个都有可能
Until then, it's just sort of in both.
所以你的程式设计捷径 就像我们世界中的量子力学?
So, your programming shortcut is like quantum mechanics in our world?
正是
Exactly like that!
有意思
Hm, interesting.
我想说的是
I guess what I'm trying to say is
我们的宇宙可能也是一种模拟
our universe is probably also a simulation.
什么?
What?
但你刚刚才说不可能
But, that's the exact opposite of what you said one minute ago!
新证据出现了,我就改变想法
New evidence was presented, and I changed my mind.
我是科学家,不是...
I'm a scientist, not a...
笨蛋? -政客
Idiot? - ...politician.
天啊,想想看,你若发现你整个人格
Man. Imagine how awful it would be
只是模拟出来的,那会有多可怕 就像班德的人格
to find out your whole personality was just simulated,like Bender's.
什么模拟?是在说像谁吗?
Whuzzulated? Like whozer's!?
我只是在说你是人工智慧,班德
I just mean you're an artificial intelligence, Bender.
就像在教授的模拟世界中的人
Like the people in the Professor's simulation.
人工? -对
Artificial? - Uh-huh. Yep.
你为什么要告诉我?你毁了我的人生
Why'd you have to tell me!? You just ruined my life!
我的人生原来是大骗局!
My big fat fake life!
你是行走的铁桶
You're a walking bucket!
你怎么能说我不是真实的?
How can you say I'm not real!?
如果你扎我,我不会流血吗?
If you prick me, do I not bleed?
好吧,这例子不好
Okay, that was a bad example!
我流血了 -炫耀喔
Ow! I'm bleeding!Showoff.
乖,班德,你跟我们一样是真实的
There there, Bender.You're as real as any of us.
哲学家笛卡儿说
The philosopher René Descartes said,
「我思故我在」,你会思考吗?
"I think, therefore I am."Can you think?
我想我不会
I don't think so!
我想我可能不会思考
I think I might not be able to think!
总之,这是很有趣的小宇宙
Anyway, it was a fun little universe,
但继续看下去会耗费大笔电费
but we're looking at a Godzilla-sized electric bill.
该把它关掉了
It's time to shut it down.
但你们不能把它关掉,这就像把我关掉
But, you can't just turn them off!That would be like turning me off!
好办法,这样可以省更多电 但先拔掉这个
Good idea! That'll save even more power!But, we'll start with them.
不!
No......no...
插头卡住了,或者我只是十分虚弱
The plug is stuck.Or maybe I'm just extraordinarily weak.
那是有可能
That is a possibility.
真是的,我就让模拟世界再运行久一点
Oh, bother. I'll just keep the simulation running a little longer.
谢谢,教授
Thanks, Professor!
班德,你怎么能在半空中飞越这么久?
Bender, how were you leaping through the air that entire time?
我没有,我第一次跳过来时还差一点 所以我又跳了一次
I wasn't! My first leap missed by a mile,so I leapt again
但我一直没停止尖叫
But, I never stopped screaming for a second!.
我觉得我已经存在了一段时间,莉拉
I feel like I've been in existence for a while now, Leela.
所以我该为自己立定一个人生目标了
So, it's time I set myself a life's goal.
太棒了,我就安静一下,让你好好想想
That's a great idea!I'll be quiet and let you think.
我就把电视打开 淹没分散注意力的噪音
And I'll turn on the TV to drown out any distracting noises.
想到了!我找到我的人生目标了