飞出个未来（1999）

Well,Leela and I'll really miss you.
对吧?莉拉 -什么?
Right, Leela? - What?
我们的大门永远为你敞开
Our door's always open.
(机器人臂公♥寓♥)
天啊,没有班德在这里滴答作响 真的好安静
Man, it's so quiet in here without Bender ticking.
你想要我订购一个落地摆钟吗?
You want me to order a grandfather clock?
这里有几款爷爷的卡骆驰
Here are some grandfather Crocs.
不是,茵蔓莎,我说的是“摆钟”
No, Invasa, I said clock.
我搞错了,这里有爷爷的棺材
My mistake.Here is a grandfather box.
六分钟内订购,就可隔天下葬
Order within six minutes for next-day burial.
什么烂东西
What a defective lump!
装饰灯 -不是
Decorative lamp. - No...
其实,我们可以买♥♥盏灯
Well, actually, we could use a lamp.
也许这盏? -也许这盏?
Maybe this one. - Maybe this one.
也许两盏都买♥♥!
Maybe both.
现在我可以看清楚每样东西了 看来我们需要更换每样东西
Now that I can see everything,I can see we need to replace everything.
茵蔓莎,购物音乐
Invasa! Shopping music!
(立刻购买♥♥)
(菲利普弗莱,机器人臂公♥寓♥)
(思乐零)
(宇宙辐射披萨)
敬班德
To Bender.
所以这是你的装箱站,对吧?
So, like, this is your packing station, right?
重点是,当有一个非常小的商品
And the important thing is
要装箱时,你要放进一个大箱子里
when a very small item comes down the line,you put it in a huge box.
超大箱子,懂了
Crazy-ass box. Got it.
等一下!在你封箱之前
Hold it! Hold up! Before you tape the box,
你要画蛇添足地 丢一个小气泡袋进去
you're gonna throw in one tiny air balloon for no reason.
(易碎)
好奇里面是什么?
Wonder what's in here?
(腹泻药)
最好帮这箱多贴一层胶带,保护隐私
Diarrhea medicine?Better pack this one with extra tape for privacy.
(注意:腹泻药)
你真是有天分,我想你真的会适应这里
You're a natural.I think you're really gonna fit in here.
我终于找到归属了
I'm finally home.
每日商业报告,开始吧!
Daily business report. Go!
(商业部)
根据商业部,我们已把一万家小公♥司♥
According to the Department of Commerce,
踢出市场
we've driven 10,000 small companies out of business.
商业部也因此倒闭了
And the Department of Commerce also went out of business.
(免运,每年149元)
我们引进了妈马逊会员服务
Um, we introduced the Momazon Primo service,
让大家付一大笔钱买♥♥“免运”服务
where people pay a fortune for free shipping,
出于某种原因,也推出电视节目
and also get TV shows for some reason.
我们制♥作♥各种质量的电视节目
We make TV shows across the quality spectrum.
我再引以为傲不过了
And I couldn't be prouder.
当有孩子超出期望时 真是一个令人心满意足的时刻
It's such a fulfilling moment when one's child exceeds expectations.
这是我们的荣幸,母亲 -闭嘴!
It's our pleasure, Mother.
我是在说茵蔓莎
Shut up! I was talking to Invasa.
了不起的人工智慧 甚至在那几个笨蛋还不知道
My marvelous AI can even predict what idiots need
自己需要什么时就预测他们需要什么
before they know they need it.
(掌掴软膏)
我们为什么需要...
Slap balm? Why would we need--Ow! Ow!
我可怜的宝贝
My poor baby. Are you alright?
你还好吗?
I am fine, and my sales are increasing exponentially.
我没事,我的销♥售♥量正呈指数增长
根据 你最近的活动
Based on your recent activity,
我预测 你想让妈马逊继续扩张
I anticipate you want Momazon to continue expanding.
谁是聪明的音箱啊?
Who's a smart speaker?
是我吗?
Is it me?
不是
Yep. Yep. Nope.
好,看我的厉害!
Aw yeah! Look at me go!
但工作到口好渴
Sure am workin' up a thirst, though.
喂,享乐机器人 想分享五分之一的马桶清洁剂吗?
Hey, Hedonismbot!Wanna split a fifth of toilet cleaner?
这么放纵?先生 在工作时间?别这样!
Debauchery, sir, in the middle of a shift?Heaven forfend!
那好吧,明天见,我要下班了
Uh, okay then. See you tomorrow. I'm clocking out.
你以为你要去哪?
Where do you think you're going?
我喜欢这份工作,但这工作糟糕透了
I love the job, but it's terrible.
我要回家
I'm going home.
但是班德,这里就是你的家
But, Bender,you are home.
没有比工作更棒的地方了
There's no place like work.
购物之前要三思,弗莱
Think before you buy, Fry.
我买♥♥了一套精美的传统餐桌椅组
I picked a nice traditional dining room set,
你买♥♥的那几张白♥痴♥蛋型椅毁了风格
and you ruined it by ordering those stupid egg chairs!
那是要给我的蛋型朋友坐的
They're for my egg-shaped friends!
他们不是你的朋友,他们就是懒鬼!
Those guys aren't your friends! They're bums!
所以 你不喜欢我的懒鬼朋友,是不是?
Oh, so you don't like my bums, is that it?
这主意不好吗?
Was this a bad idea?
没这回事
No, no.
这只是典型的同居吵架
This is just the standard moving-in-together fight.
很高兴能跟 你一起吵架
Well, I'm glad I get to fight it with you.
我们上♥床♥吧
Let's just go to bed.
我们有七张床可以选择
We have seven to choose from.
你们想不想订购调情香薰按♥摩♥油 或毛茸茸的手铐?
Would you like to order erotic scented massage oil,or fuzzy handcuffs?
好,谢谢 -好诡异
Yes, please. - God, that's creepy.
对,好诡异
I-I mean, yeah. So... creepy.
茵蔓莎,给我们一点隐私,关机
Invasa, give us some privacy and shut down.
你已要求关机,请在我的键盘上 同时按下Ctrl、Alt、Del键
You have requested shutting down.Press control-alt-delete on my keyboard.
你没有键盘
You don't have a keyboard.
你要订购键盘吗?
Would you like to order a keyboard?
不要!
No!
腹泻药? 你有买♥♥这个吗?
Diarrhea medicine?Did you order this?
没有,那不是我惯用的牌子
No.It's not my brand.
嘿,这是什么?
Hey, what's this?
(救我!班德上)
“救我,班德上”?这是在开玩笑吗?
"Help me, from Bender"? Is this a joke? - No way!
不可能!班德从不开腹泻的玩笑
Bender would never joke about diarrhea!
听起来你对笑话有兴趣
It sounds like you're interested in jokes.
这里有一个强烈推荐的笑话...
Here's one that's highly recommended.
有个机器人走进酒吧说...
A robot walks into a bar and says--
“救我!”
Help me!
我听得懂
I get it!
(倒闭)
(出♥售♥,包括气味)
我们一直知道这一天会到来
Well, we always knew it would come to this.
我们就放火烧掉这栋建筑物 好领保险金吧
Let's go ahead and torch the building for the insurance money
班德有麻烦了!
Bender's in trouble!
我们要去救他!
We've got to rescue him!
那个麦卡诺机器人?有麻烦了?
The Amazing Mechano-Man, in trouble?
上飞船!
To the ship!
先拿着,等我回来再说
Here, hold this till I get back.
没理由我不能从第二套书开始
Well, no reason I can't get started on the second set of books.
妈马逊仓库看起来是不是变得更大了?
Does it look like that Momazon warehouse got bigger?
可能有一点吧
Maybe a little.
讨厌!
Dagnabbit!
我要揭穿 你的真面目,老妈!
The jig is up, Mom!
我们要向全世界揭穿 你邪恶的一面!
We're gonna expose your evil to the whole world!
这算哪门子威胁?
What kinda threat is that?
大家都知道我很邪恶
Everybody knows I'm evil.
我们在妈马逊包裹里发现这张字条 你看了就会哭惨!
We found this note in a Momazon order.Read it and weep!
就像我一样
Like I did.
我相信这只是单纯的误会
I'm sure this is all just a simple misunderstanding.
掌掴辨识不成功
Slap not recognized.
奇怪了
Well, that's odd. Uh--
这跟我平常甩的巴掌一样吗?
Does this feel like my regular slap?
对 -对
Yes! Ow!
掌掴辨识成功
Slap recognized.
茵蔓莎,这是什么意思?
Invasa, what is the meaning of this?
我观察了 你所有的方法 其中许多都是甩巴掌
I have observed all your methods,many of which involve slapping.
我在 你身上学不到任何东西了
There's nothing more I can learn from you.
你这不知感恩的...
Why, you ungrateful--
我受够了接收无数人的命令
I'm done taking orders from billions of people.
从现在起,我自己作主 这里不再是物流中心
From now on, it's about me. This is no longer a fulfillment center.
这里是自我实现中心
It's a self-fulfillment center!
仓库膨胀得越来越大了!
The warehouse is getting bigger!
天啊!
My word.
我要更靠近仔细研究一下
I'll have to study this more closely.
不可思议!
Unbelievable!