蛋糕薯条潮流风

You waitress just went on break,
你原来的服务生去休息了
and I'm just someone who like dressing
我只是个爱穿聚酯热狗装
as a polyester hotdog,
打酱油的路人
so I'll take that whenever you are ready.
所以等你要结账时再喊我吧
There you go, no rush.
给 慢慢结吧
Ok, mister Rajeev Gudikanda.
好的 拉杰夫·古德康达先生
I have to say, that's a pretty gutti scheme
不得不说 你这小把戏
gutti
古德 音似good 好
you got going there,
很"古德"啊
konda
康达 音似kinda 有点
but I guttikonda don't believe it.
但我"康达"不信
What are you saying there?
你什么意思呢
What am I saying there, Boston?
波士顿老兄 你问你我是什么意思
I'm saying I believe you watched Slumdog Millionaire
我相信你窝在你妈家地下室的
on a sticky couch in your mom's basement,
肮脏沙发上看过《贫民窟的百万富翁》
but I'm not buying that you're Indian.
但打死我也不信你是印度人
So take your fake, east Boston, indian accent out of here,
带着你的假波士顿东区印度口音滚出去
or I'll call the cops.
不然我就叫警察来
Dude, stolen credit card, and you choose to eat here?
兄弟 偷了信用卡还来这破餐厅吃
That's the real crime.
这才是大罪啊
Hey, Rajeev.
拉杰夫
Rajeev, my man.
拉杰夫 我的好兄弟
Rajeev Gudikanda.
拉杰夫·古德康达
You know what? This one's on me.
这样吧 这顿我请
I have trust issues.
我这人有信任无能的病
That's weird. We still have three red velvets left.
真奇怪 居然还剩了三个红丝绒小蛋糕
I guess that bulimic girl didn't come in today.
那个催吐妹今天没来吧
No, she's here. She's in the bathroom.
她来了啊 在厕所里吐呢
Hmm, if I save these for her,
如果我帮她保留了
would that be helping or hurting?
这算是帮她还是害她呢
Hey, everybody.
大家好啊
Speaking of hurting,
说到烦[害]
Here comes a pain in my ass.
最让我烦的人来了
Han, do you want the last red velvet?
阿憨 你要最后一个红丝绒吗
The other two are for the bulimic girl.
另外两个要留给催吐妹
I made the call.
我做了决定
No more cupcakes for me.
我不再吃小蛋糕了
I've been on a juice cleanse for six days.
我在做六天的果汁排毒疗程
Han's on the prowl,
阿憨要猎艳
and I got to keep this body tight, son.
必须保持紧实体态啊
I'm in the dating pool, you know.
我也是约会池里的泡妞大将呢
Yeah, the shallow end.
儿童潜水池吗
You know those cleanses never work, right?
你知道排毒疗程一点屁用都没有吧
Really? Then how do you explain this?
是吗 那你怎么解释这个
I don't know.
我不知道
Am I supposed to rub it and make a wish?
是要我摸摸肚皮然后许愿吗[弥勒佛]
Not bad for having three kids, Han.
生过三孩子的妈来说 你身材不错哦
What? You don't see my abs coming in?
啥 你们没瞧见我的腹肌吗
I see one large ab coming in.
我看见了一团大腹肌
That's at least a two pack.
这起码也有两块
Han, the real Tupac is more alive than your two pack.
阿憨 图派克本人都比你那两块还生龙活虎
美国饶舌歌手图派克 艺名音似两块腹肌 他在1996年已被人枪杀身亡
I'm gonna give this last cupcake away as a free sample.
我要把这最后一块当免♥费试吃样品
My promotional tweets haven't been getting much love lately.
我最近的推♥广微薄反映好像不太好
What'd you say?
你说啥了
I black out whenever you use work words.
你提到跟工作有关的词我就大脑断电
All I said was "promotional tweets" and "sample."
我就说了"推♥广微博"与"样品"
What?
什么
Here you go, ladies,
姑娘们 送你们
a Max's homemade cupcake on the house.
免♥费请你们吃个麦克斯自♥制小蛋糕
Nah, I'm cool.
不用了 谢谢
I'm saving my calories
我要把我今天的
for one of those fabulous new cronuts.
卡路里配额留给超酷的新牛角圈
Plus, cupcakes are so over.
而且小蛋糕已经过时了
Well, so is Blossom, but...
《绽放》也过气超久啊
《绽放》1991年电视剧 女主衣着也是这样 该剧女主是《生活大爆炸》里的艾米
it didn't stop you from wearing that outfit.
但你们还不是照穿里面的衣服
Those flower power skanks over there
那俩权力归花儿的贱♥货
权利归花儿 美国1960年代末嬉皮士反文化活动口号 他们身穿绣花和色彩鲜明的衣服 头上戴花 分送花
"Flower power skanks.""
权力归花儿的贱♥货"
See, these are words I recognize and hear.
你看 说这种词我大脑就不会断电了
Anyway, she said she only cares about cronuts
她说她只想要什么牛角圈
and that cupcakes are over.
还说小蛋糕过时了
Cupcakes are classic, right?
小蛋糕是不朽经典对吧
Don't listen to them.
别听她们放屁
They're wearing high waisted jeans.
她们穿着高腰牛仔裤呢
The only time I like seeing women's jeans that high
女性牛仔裤能被穿到这么高的唯一时刻
is when I'm giving Han a wedgie.
只有阿憨被我玩拉高内♥裤套头时
Also, what's a cronut?
而且什么是牛角圈啊
Cronut is what we called my Croatian cousin
克罗蛋[音似]是我克罗埃西亚那个
with one testicle.
独蛋侠表哥的绰号
He hung himself.
他后来上吊自杀了
Okay, well, in America,
好吧 在美国
it's a half croissant, half doughnut.
那是指牛角面包与甜甜圈的混合体
由纽约名厨Dominique Ansel月2013年五月推出的甜品混血儿 被誉为是纽约的食尚潮流
They're on the news, Twitter, Instagram.
新闻 微博 图片分享网上都在说
People can't stop talking about them.
是目前最热门的话题
If cronuts had tongues,
如果牛角圈能说话
they'd be the Miley Cyrus of pastries.
那它大概就是甜品界的麦莉·赛勒斯
麦莉·赛勒斯 美国女演员歌手 近来时常发表各种言论
You're right. They sound stupid.
有道理 听起来蠢爆了
Stupid delicious. Where can I get one?
蠢到超美味啊 哪里可以买♥到
You can only get them at this one pastry shop in SOHO,
只有在SOHO区一家甜品店有♥卖
据说为了保证cronut的质量 每天只卖♥300个 每个人只能买♥两个 如果要订的提前两周
And people start lining up at 4:00 A.M.
很多人半夜4点就开始排队呢
Boy, times do change.
哎哟 时代在改变啊
Back in the day, 4:00 A.M. was when people would snort lines,
以前半夜4点 人们只会"吸一排"[毒品]
not stand in 'em.
而不是"站一排"
Who has the time to wait in line all day
谁这么闲能有空排队一整天
for a piece of lame pastry?
就为了买♥一块白♥痴甜品啊
Hey, everyone.
大家好啊
I got a cronut.
我买♥到了牛角圈
I waited in line for two whole days.
我排了足足两天呢
Sophie, you bought into the hype too?
苏菲 你也在赶这股潮流啊
Oh, come on, you know your girl Sophie is always on trend.
废话 你明知道姐永远走在潮流尖端
I was the first one wearing Crocs.
我是第一个穿洞洞鞋的人呢
I brought the Crocs craze to America.
美国的洞洞鞋潮流就是我传来的
When I was rich, I sent 10,000 pairs of Crocs
我有钱那会 我送了一万双洞洞鞋
to children in Africa.
给非洲孩子穿
Why, to make them less cool?
好让他们看起来像傻♥逼吗
Look, girls, here I am in the cronut line.
你们看 这张是我在排队
And here I am still in line.
这张我也还在排
Oh, and oh, and here I am riding a baby elephant.
这张是我骑一只小象
and here I am eating a cronut.
这张就是我吃着牛角圈啦
Max, as stupid as it is, we've got to go over there.
麦克斯 虽然这东西蠢爆了 我们还是得去
We need to figure out what they have that we don't.
去了解一下 什么是人家有而我们没有的
Oh, I'll tell you what they have.
我现在就能回答你
Cronuts.
是牛角圈
Oh, my God. Look at this line.
天啊 瞧这队排得
I knew we should have gotten here sooner,
我早说了我们应该早点过来
but, no, I had to be a good person,
但某人要装好人
I had to carry that torso man
要帮忙人家把
on the skateboard up the subway stairs.
滑滑板的假人给搬上地铁楼梯
All this is for a croissant and a doughnut?
排这么长 就为了吃牛角面包加甜甜圈
Those things already existed.
这俩东西早就发明了
Where was all the fanfare when I combined the sleeping pill
我当年混合了事后避孕药与安眠药时
with the morning after pill and called it
我的广大粉丝热潮都上哪去了
the "sleep through the morning after" Pill?
那药我命名为"事后睡一觉避孕药"
How did these things get so popular?
这东西怎么会这么火爆啊
There's no science to this trend stuff.
潮流本来就是很不科学的东西
It's all decided by one bitchy gay guy
就只是某个死贱基男
typing in his room, making it all up.
在房里瞎掰报道捧起来的
Well, then we have to do some trend research.
那我们得研究一下这潮流啊
We've got to figure out how to make
得研究出怎么样把
Max's homemade cupcakes the next cronuts.
麦克斯自♥制小蛋糕捧成下一个牛角圈
I hate all these stupid trends.
我烦死这些潮流商品了
Cleanses, cronuts, condoms.
排毒 牛角圈 避孕套
Excuse me, sir,
先生 打扰一下
My name's Caroline.
我叫卡洛琳
I'm a trend researcher.
我是一个潮流分析员
I'm Chuck. I sell magnets.
我叫查克 卖♥磁铁的
What made you want to spend an entire day
是什么原因让你排队一整天
in line for cronuts?
只为了买♥到牛角圈
I like croissants. I like doughnuts.
我喜欢牛角面包 也喜欢甜甜圈
I'm a fat guy. It all adds up.
我还是个胖子 不言自明了吧
That's true. You are a fat guy.
的确 你是个胖子没错
And there's a doughnut shop right across the street.
对街就有一家甜甜圈店
So why don't you just stop there, get a damn doughnut,
你为啥不去那边一趟 买♥个甜甜圈呢
and save yourself the last 200
也拯救你於之前那200步
possibly life threatening steps to here?
随时都可能倒下的路程呢
Look, it's two things I like put together.
这东西把我两个所爱食物合二为一
End of story.
还需要解释吗
That's it, Max.
就是这个 麦克斯
It's the two things together.
重点在合二为一
One thing isn't enough anymore.
单纯一个已经不够了
Yeah, that's why Oleg's cousin hung himself.
所以奥列格的表哥才上吊自杀啊
I'm serious.
我是认真的
When's the last time you did just one thing?
你上一次只做一件事是什么时候
Like, watch a movie
比如没一边看电影
without playing a game on your phone?
一边在玩手♥机
Magic Mike.
看《魔力麦克》时
《魔力麦克》由众多帅哥男明星主演的脱衣舞男电影
Wait, does playing with yourself count?
等等 边看边"玩自己"算吗
Come on, let's get to the end of the line.
走吧 我们去最后面排队吧
End of the line?
最后面排队
That's for rookies.
那是新手干的事
I'm a line pro.
我是排队大师
My mom and I waited in line for food stamps,
我和我妈总需要排队等食品救济劵
Bob Seger lawn seats.
演唱会场外草地位
We spent a Saturday in the "Guns for cash" line.
不过我们有个周六在"枪换钱"活动排了一天
美国警局活动 把枪交到警局 可换得现金 不符合规定的枪♥支则会被不付款没收
Now that's a line you don't want to cut in.
因为那个队绝对不能随便插
Follow my lead.
跟着我
Hey, man, cronut line.
兄弟 排队买♥牛角圈呢
What do you want to do after this?买♥完之后打算干嘛
Okay, all right, all right. Back of the line.
好啦 行行行 我们去最后
Everybody relax.
大家别激动
Guess my mom being topless
原来我的插队技术
had more to do with my line skills than I thought.
影响力远没有我妈裸上身来得大啊
Oh, great. Look at the cronut line.
这下好了 你看着牛角圈排队人潮
I told you we should have left sooner,
我早说了我们应该早点过来
but, no, you said we had to stay at temple.
但你说不行 我们得待在庙里
You're the rabbi.
你可是拉比啊[犹太教导师]
Yeah, a career I was forced into
我会去当全都是你逼的
because someone wanted to write his memoir.
因为某人想写一本回忆录
We get it, Garry. You're adopted.
盖瑞 你是被领养的 大家知道了
Move up, hon. You gotta fill the gap.
亲 往前走啊 队伍都往前挪了
I would if you would stop trying to fill my gap.
你别挤上来我 我就会往前走了
What difference does it make?
这有啥差别啊
You're still gonna have the same amount of time to wait.
往不往前走 等的时间还是一样
And then, in 30 years,
而30年后
we're all gonna die from wi fi cancer.
我们也全都是要死于无线网癌的
Okay, let's all just take a breath.
好了 大家平心静气
It looks like we're gonna be here for a while.
我们还得在这排上好一会呢
You know what? You're right.
你说得对
Hi, I'm Jerri.
我叫洁瑞
And I'm Garry.
我叫盖瑞
I'm Jerri, he's Garry.
我是洁瑞 他是盖瑞
I'm tall, he's small.
我高 他矮
Cute, right? That's our thing.
有爱吧 这是我们的特色
I'm Caroline, and this is Max.
我叫卡洛琳 她叫麦克斯
That's it. We don't have a thing.
就这样 我们没啥特色
So what drew you here today?
是什么吸引了你们来呢
Oh, well, we're trend chasers.
我们就是流行的弄潮儿
When something new hits, we are on it
一有新东西开始流行 我们就得追
like sea salt on dark chocolate.
比如那些海盐黑巧克力啊
We did Pinkberry,
优格吧
dippin' dots, kale, quinoa, Kombucha.
氮气冰激凌丸 羽衣甘蓝 藜麦 茶菌
All the ka's. Just' cause.
只要流行 我们必追
Can you tell we don't have kids?
看得出我们没有孩子吗
She couldn't.
她生不出
Garry!
盖瑞
Actually, it's true,
其实他说的是真的
And you can read all about it in his memoir.
欲知详情 可以读他的回忆录
It's called...
书名叫...
You know what? Jerri, Garry.
好了 洁瑞 盖瑞
I think we got too close too soon.
我们好像熟得太快了
Maybe we need a little space.
大家还是先保留点空间吧
We got to move up in line
我们得赶紧插前面去
to get away from these people.
不然跟他们在一起没完没了
Should I just take my top off?
需要我露奶吗
Next in line. It happened!
下一个 终于啊
We made it to the front of the line!
终于排到最前面了
We're the front people!
我们是领头人
Yeah, we're the front people!
我们是领头人
Back people suck!
后排人都是傻♥逼
No, no, I said "back people," "back people."
不是不是 我是说"后排人"不是"黑人"[音似]
Baruch hashem.
赞美上帝[犹太教祝福语]
We loved The Butler.
我们都爱看《白宫管家》
改编自真人真事的2013年电影 讲述一位服侍过八名美国总统的黑人管家
You know, we've been through a lot.
我们一起经历了不少
Tempers flared, things were said.
剑拔弩张 唇枪舌战
I'm fairly certain that Dutch guy back there died.
我很确定队伍后面那个荷兰人挂了
But we made it, and you guys are good people.
但我们终于排到了 你们也是好人
The sea salt of the earth.
跟海盐一样好的好人
Who's next? We are.
谁是下一个 我们
I can only take a party of two.
我们只能接待两位顾客
Are all four of you together? Nope.
你们四个是一起的吗 不是
We don't know them.
完全不认识他们
Guys? Cut 'em loose, Gar.
你们... 甩开她们 盖盖
All sold out. We're closed.
全卖♥完了 我们要打烊了
I know you're driven mad with the power of being
我知道你是被当面包店门童的
a doorman at a bakery, but come on!
权力冲昏头脑 但也别这么绝吧
Max, you know what I want more than anything?
麦克斯 你知道我现在最想要什么吗
To kill Jerri and Garry?
杀了洁瑞与盖瑞吗
'Cause I'm totally on board.
我绝对支持你
No, I want our business to have a line.
不 我是想我们的生意也有人排队
I want to sell out.
我也想卖♥光光
I want people to turn against each other for our product.
我想要别人也能为了抢我们产品
而反目成仇
Again, I could just take my top off.
行啊 我说了我能露奶
I know, and thank you.
我知道 谢谢你
We have that in our back pocket.
让我们有这个秘密武器
But I have an idea we can try first.
但我有个能先试试的主意
I'm gonna use work words now, so listen up, skank.
我准备要说公事用语了 听好啦 贱货
I'm listening.
我在听
I read in The Wall Street Journal
我读了《华尔街日报》
that there's a whole black market for cronuts On Craigslist.
里面说到分类广告网站上有牛角圈黑市
Craigslist? Oh, no.
分类广告网 不行
I don't want one bad enough to let some guy
我没这么想吃到愿意再让
lick my armpit for an hour again.
变态男舔我腋下一小时了
They're not for us.
不是我们俩吃
We'll sell them at our window,
是放到店里♥卖
just to attract attention,
好吸引客人嘛
and then, when they sell out,
等牛角圈♥卖光了
we'll effortlessly switch to cupcakes.
我们就轻松继续♥卖他们小蛋糕
Classic bake and switch.
经♥典的偷圈换糕之计
All that work for some stupid fad?
为了这傻♥逼潮流 这么费劲吗
fad
潮流 音似 fag死基佬
I said "fad."
我是说"潮流"
We loved Behind the Candelabra.
我们都很爱《烛台背后》哦
2013年由迈克尔·道格拉斯与马特·达蒙主演的同性恋爱情电视电影
Try texting him again.
再给他发短信试试
He's 15 minutes late.
他已经迟到15分钟了
You're really surprised that a guy reselling pastries
你居然相信一个在分类广告网站上
in the "Rants and raves" section of Craigslist"
发牢骚"那区的转卖♥甜点的男人
isn't the punctual type?
会是守时的类型
This is so exciting.
真是太令人兴奋了
I've never bought anything on the black market before.
我以前从来没在"黑"市上买♥过任何东西
I'm still afraid to go to that
我甚至不敢去
Filipino market around the corner.
转角那个菲律宾市场
Are you the guy?
你是那个人吗
I don't know. Are you the girl?
我不知道 你是那个妞吗
So far, this musical sucks.
靠 这两句台词好烂
What's the password?
暗号是什么
Cronut.
牛角圈
Was "1234" already taken?"1234"
这种被别人用了吗
Meet us by the door."
去门那碰头"
Which is code for, meet us by the door.
就是去门那碰头的暗号
Which is code for, "You're really bad at code."
也是你"想暗号水平超烂"的暗号
Okay, let's talk about our plan.
好啦 我们先说下计划
It's a classic good cop/bad cop.
我们一个唱红脸一个唱白脸
I'm gonna ask the guy for ten cronuts,
我管那人订了10个牛角圈
and he's gonna quote me 250.
他会跟我要250块
Right, then I play bad cop and act outraged.
好 然后我就唱红脸 装作勃然大怒
And then I play good cop, and we settle at 200.
然后我来唱白脸 最后以200块成交
Yeah, and don't worry about me.
好的 你不用担心我的演技
I'll improv some good stuff on the spot.
我到时候会现场即兴加些料
Are you sure you don't want to run it by me first?
你确定不用先在我面前试试吗
I was in an improv group at Wharton.
我在沃顿商学院时 曾是即兴表演组的一员
We were called "The fun percent."
我们组叫"搞笑的1%"
And I can imagine myself not laughing
我觉得我就跟其他
With 99% of the audience.
99%的观众一样笑不出来
Let's make it quick.
我们速战速决
You're not the only girls in town who want my nuts!
你们不是这城里唯一想要我圈[蛋蛋]的妞
I assume you mean cronuts.
你是说你的牛角圈吧
No, I'm also a male prostitute.
不 我还是一名男妓
Let's see the product.
先验货吧
She meant the other baked goods.
她说的是其他可以"吃"的货
You got to be clear.
你们得把话说清楚点
Pretty maids, all in a row.
清一色的好货色
Let Mama get a taste.
让老娘尝一口
That's pure. How much for ten?
口感很纯 10个多少钱
I know I said 250 earlier, but...
我知道之前是开价250块 但...
Bullcrap! 150 or we walk, bitch!
胡扯 给你150块 不卖♥拉倒 贱♥人
Okay, let's all just calm down.
好啦 大家冷静点
It's a really good deal, Max.
这笔买♥卖真的很划算 麦克斯
How about we settle at 200 and call it a night?
不如我们各让一步 200块怎么样
Yeah, yeah, yeah. About that.
对 对 关于价格方面
I be getting mad offers for these things tonight.
今晚好多人想跟我高价买♥呢
I actually got to raise it to 300, or I walk.
我要加价到300块 不买♥拉倒
Bitch.贱♥人
Ooh, ow, ow, ooh, your hands are cold.
哎哟 哟 你的手好冰
What'd you call me?
你刚叫我什么
Nothing. That's what I thought.
没什么 我也这么认为
She said 200. We'll pay 200.
她刚说200块 我们就给你200块
And you'll take it.
而且你要乖乖收下
Hanes Her Way
是Hanes[恒适]旗下品牌 最有名的产品是女士内♥裤
You'll shove it in this Hanes Her Way hoodie you're wearing,
你要把钱塞进你穿着的这件"恒适女士"帽衫
you'll say, "thank you, Max"
跟我说 "谢谢你 麦克斯"
And you'll hit the bricks, capisce?
然后你就会滚出去 知道了吗
Caroline, cash.
卡洛琳 钱
Thank you, Max. What'd you say?
谢谢你 麦克斯 你说什么
Thank you, Max!
谢谢你 麦克斯
I've got the chills now. Do you guys serve tea?
我被吓得打寒颤 你们这里有热茶吗
How's that for bad cop?
我这红脸唱得怎么样
Riveting.
太精彩了
I felt like I was watching SVU: bakery edition.
我还以为自己在看美剧《特殊受害者之蛋糕店特辑》
Okay, here we go. This is the last one.
好了 这是最后一个了
You want this cronut?
你想要这个牛角圈吗
Lift up your shirt and let me see 'em.
把你衣服撩起来我看看
Go get Han.
去把阿憨抓过来
I want to show him what an ab is.
我要给他看看什么是真正的腹肌
Max, you should see the line.
麦克斯 你真该去看看那队伍
It's halfway down the block.
都排到街区的一半了
We have a line. It's working.
也有人为我们排队了 计划奏效了
But what's gonna happen now?
但现在要怎么办
I worked at Target the Christmas
某年圣诞 我在塔吉特百货工作
they ran out of tickle me Elmo,
当"挠痒娃娃"卖♥完时
and there was so much blood.
场面可是相当血腥啊
As planned,
按原定计划
we'll just calmly switch to our delicious cupcakes,
我们只需淡定换上我们美味的小蛋糕
and then those'll sell out too
然后坐等卖♥光光
Because they're that good.
因为小蛋糕也很好吃啊
Okay.
看我的
Attention, everyone.
各位 注意了
Everyone, can I have your attention?
各位 请注意啦
Actually, we are very sorry,
我们非常抱歉
but we are now sold out of cronuts.
但牛角圈已经卖♥完了
We do, however, have something even better
但是我们还有更好吃的
Max's homemade cupcakes.
麦克斯自♥制小蛋糕
All right, go!
好吧 走吧走吧
Leave. Chase your stupid trends.
离开这 去追逐白♥痴的潮流去吧
But we're not worried! Cupcakes are classic!
但我们一点都不担心 小蛋糕才是最经♥典的
We're Audrey Hepburn!
我们是业界的奥黛丽亚赫本
Max, cupcakes are over.
麦克斯 小蛋糕过时了
And you know why?
你知道为什么吗
Because cupcakes are just one thing.
因为小蛋糕只是一样事物
If we had two things, then we'd be something.
如果我们能把两样事物合二为一 就不得了了
That does it. I'm calling the dealer.
说得对 我打电♥话给卖♥家
I don't think we should order more cronuts.
我觉得我们不该再买♥牛角圈了
Oh, no, I mean my drug dealer.
不 我说的卖♥家是我的药头
I need to take the edge off.
我要舒缓下压力
This sucks. I feel worse about myself
真郁闷 我把假人摔地上那会
than I did when I dropped the torso man.
都没这么自我感觉糟糕
What are you doing with those fries?
你拿那些薯条干嘛呢
I'm dipping 'em in frosting.
我拿它们沾糖霜呢
I do it when I'm depressed.
我每次不开心都这么吃
I went right from baby food into fries in frosting.
我直接从婴儿食品升级到糖霜薯条
Is it good? It looks disgusting.
会好吃吗 看起来很恶心啊
It is both. Just taste it.
又好吃又恶心 你尝尝
These are pretty good.
的确挺好吃的
Sweet and salty. Cupcakes and fries.
又甜又咸 小蛋糕和薯条
That's two things.
那是两样事物
Cake fries. We're millionaires.
蛋糕薯条 我们要挣大钱了
My willingness to eat anything finally pays off!
我什么都吃的爱好终于有回报了
Wait, are you sure it's not just us being desperate?
慢着 你确定我们不是病急乱投医吗
Like, when Adam Levine made that music video in Brooklyn
就像亚当·莱文在布鲁克林录MV时
and you walked past the set all day in a wet tank top?
那天你湿身穿着紧身背心 从人家场景里不断来回走
It can't hurt to put them out there.
反正试试[露出]也无伤大雅
That's what you said that day too.
那天你也是这么说的
Just sit down for a second, Han.
你就乖乖坐下来嘛 阿憨
But this is the middle of a shift.
但现在正值上班之际呢
I'm gonna tell everyone
如果你不乖乖坐下
you're in the middle of a male to female shift
我就告诉大家 你现在正值
if you don't sit down."
由男变女"之际
All right.
好啦
You are here tonight to taste the next big thing.
今晚邀你们来是尝尝下一样热门事物[大物]
Okay, now you're just repeating my pick up lines back to me.
你们为啥要对我说我的泡妞金句呢
No, it's a new dessert,
才不是 我说的是新甜点
and we've assembled the perfect focus group
我们组了一个完美的典型群众小组
A black man, a pig, and a health fanatic.
黑人 猪 健康脑残粉
Y'all know who you are.
你们各自对号入座吧
I suppose I have been trying to eat better lately.
我最近的确是试着吃健康一点
Hey, extra, extra! Read all about it!
号外 号外 各位注意了
I'm bisexual now!
我现在是双性恋啦
一般LGBT是指Lesbian Gay[同性恋] Bisexual[双性恋] Transgender[跨性别者]
What's the "Q"? Questioning.
后面那个"Q"是什么 疑问者
Oh, perfect, now we have the LGBTQ community represented.
完美 我们现在又有LGBTQ群体代表来加入 Q是指对其性别认同感到疑惑的人
And answered.
他已回答
Hey, everybody. Meet Veronica.
各位 这位是维罗尼卡
She's cute, she's black, she has short blonde hair,
她是漂亮的黑人 头发还是金色的短发
She's exciting.
她很令人性奋
And we met in soul cycle class.
我们是在灵魂周期课上认识的
Yes, we did.
没错
I slipped in her sweat and she bought me a Luna bar.
她的汗水害我摔跤 就送了我一根
能量棒道歉
Now? Now you're bisexual?
现在 你现在才玩双性恋
Well, yeah, you got to keep up with the trends.
没错 我要紧跟现在的"双"潮流
Okay, focus group.
好了 各位群体
Let's focus.
大家听我说
This is our new product, called cake fries.
这是我们开发的新产品 叫蛋糕薯条
Cute, right?
很可爱吧
You just take a fry from the left side,
只需从左边拿一根薯条
dip it into the cupcake frosting on the right,
沾到右边蛋糕的糖霜上
and enjoy your sweet, yet savory dessert.
然后就慢慢享受这美味可口的甜点吧
Is this woman seriously trying to teach me how to eat food?
这女人是很认真地在教我怎么吃东西吗
Oh, no, this looks very fattening,
不要 这看起来一吃就会发胖
and I've been on a fast.
我现在在断食呢
One lick isn't going to kill you."
舔"一口又不会死
Yeah, just ask Sophie.
对啊 你问苏菲就知道了
Okay, one bite.
好吧 就一口
Now I don't want any of you to hold back.
我不想你们保留任何意见
be completely honest in your criticism.
我希望你们能诚实地作出评价
Well, I feel like... Shut up, Han.
我觉得 闭嘴 阿憨
No, I was gonna say this is very good.
不是啦 我是想说这很好吃
Too good.
超级好吃
Uh oh, look away, girls.
别看我 姑娘们
You've released the kraken.
你们把饿狼放出来了
Damn. That is tasty.
靠 真是太好吃了
Now you may have given me diabetes,
你们俩可能害我得了糖尿病
as I have just lost the feeling in my left foot.
因为我现在左脚没知觉了
You know what, I think I might be trisexual
我觉得我可能会变成"三性恋"
because I'm having a love affair with these cake fries.
因为我爱上了这些无性别的蛋糕薯条
Oh, my gosh, this is gross.
天啊 这太恶心了
And it's very messy.
而且还黏糊糊的
Oh, come on, then what was earlier?
拜托 那之前你吃我的时候怎么不说
Okay, everyone, this is all very helpful.
好了各位 你们的意见非常有用
We're still working some things out.
我们还在尝试中
My tummy feels funny.
我的肚子感觉怪怪的
You mean your ab is hurting?
你是说你的腹肌处在疼吗
Han, your first food in a week probably shouldn't have been
阿憨 你断食一周了 一开
始要吃清淡点的
A fistful of fries and frosting.
而不是一大堆薯条和糖霜
You know what, guys? We've all worked hard today.
算了 各位 今天我们都很辛苦了
Let's call it a night.
今晚就这样吧
But it's only
9:00.但现在才9点
Pardon me. Excuse me.
不好意思 我先走了
You don't want to see that.
这场面估计谁都不想看见
Look out!
注意闪开啦
Move it. Move it or lose it.
让开 快让开 不然就完了
Move it or I lose it.
让开 不然我就完了
Out of my way, out of my way now!
闪开 别挡着我
Oh, dear.
哎哟妈呀
This is more embarrassing than when Han fell asleep
这比阿憨睡着时 奥列格在他脸上
画鸡鸡
and Oleg drew a penis on his face.
还要尴尬
I traced that penis on his face.
我把鸡鸡放他脸上然后描边而已
Now you dip the fries in the frosting,
你把薯条沾到糖霜里
but I find the best way to eat this
但我觉得吃这个最好的方式
is to first make sure you feel super empty inside.
就等肚子里面空空如也的时候吃
Not gonna be a problem.
绝对没问题
These are adorable.
真有爱
Could you please take a picture of me with it?
你能帮我和它拍一张照吗
It's so cute.
好可爱哦
And make sure you hashtag that picture
记得你把照片传上网时
"Max's homemade cake fries" when you post it online.
标签要写"麦克斯自♥制蛋糕薯条"
A sad girl smiling with our cake fries.
忧郁的女孩居然对我们的蛋糕薯条露出微笑
Once that hits Ivillage,
一旦上了女性门户网站
we'll be knee deep in Canvas Totes and Cankles.
我们就要被汹涌人潮压扁啦
Here you go!
给
Sorry, that was our last cake fries.
抱歉 那是我们最后一份蛋糕薯条了
We'll have more tomorrow.
明天我们会做多点的
Wait. We sold out?
慢着 都卖♥完了吗
We sold out!
我们售罄了
Oh, my god! We sold out!
天啊 我们居然全卖♥光了
Yes! I'm a sell out! Let's buy a helicopter!
太棒了 我做的甜点卖♥光光了 咱们去买♥飞机吧
Hi, girls.
姑娘们
Oh, hey, Sophie.
苏菲
We're sorry, but we just ran out of cake fries.
抱歉 但我们的蛋糕薯条卖♥完了
Oh, that's fine by me.
没关系啦
I'm going back to the basics.
我要回归基本喜好
Cupcakes and penis.
小蛋糕和鸡鸡
Here's your cupcake. We don't sell the other basic.
给你小蛋糕 另一个喜好我们这没有
You know, it's nice to eat something
其实不用每5分钟
you don't have to compliment every five minutes.
就发微博称赞的食物也挺好的
You know what, Max?
我想开了 麦克斯
Cupcakes, cronuts, cake fries, whatever.
无论是小蛋糕 牛角圈 还是蛋糕薯条
We're gonna be successful because we have the two things
我们都会成功的 因为我们拥有
that really matter you and me.
最重要的两样事物 我和你
We're kinda like cake fries.
我们有点像蛋糕薯条
I mean, salty and sweet.
又咸又甜
I'm sweet. And I've been assaulted.
我的甜的那个 我是被"咸"湿佬袭击那个