情牵你我她（2016）

You Me Her S01E10

Part 3 Aug. 1, 2020, 4:59 p.m.

是啊
Yeah.
你看安迪
Look, Andy.
你别别别别别再了
Don't. Don't, don't, don't. Nope. No more.
不只是...
No, just...
-不要 -好的
- No. - Okay.
不
Don't.
- 我真的很抱歉 - 哦我...
- I'm really sorry. - Oh, my...
不要
Don't.
"不要"哪个字你听不懂?
What part of "Don't" Did you not understand, please?
我可是你的课题啊对吧?
I am your fucking thesis, right?
我就像是如何在
So I'm, like, uh, how to destroy
10步以内毁掉一个年轻健康的女性
a healthy, young male in 10 simple steps.
是不是?
Is that what it is?
不不是
No, it's not.
我说过我永远不会变成我妈那样
I said I'd never be my mom,
然后我直接略过了被男人羞辱
and I just skipped over getting humiliated by a man
的那一步直接到达滥用药物那一步
and cut to just the substance abuse.
你知道就是那一部分一直很喜欢你
You know, the same part of me digs you a lot.
和你一样的部分
Same part of you.
那杰克和艾玛呢?
What about Jack and Emma?
你的哪一部分喜欢他们?
Which part of you digs them?
恩?
Hmm?
我... 你就打算把这一切打包
I... is that how you're gonna box it up
然后都寄回家?
and send it home?
这是你的儿童离婚后遗症
They were a little elaborate expression
详尽解读
of your child-of-divorce damage,
你所谓的崩溃的另一个症状?
another symptom of your alleged breakdown?
恩无论如何
Yeah, well, for what it's worth,
而且我觉得并不值得
and I know it's not worth much,
我不信
but I don't buy it.
哦很明显万圣节到了
Oh, apparently, it's Halloween.
很明显你没孩子
Apparently, you're childless.
你简直是史上最坏的人
You are the worst person in the world.
谁能比你坏?
Who is worse than you?
我13岁的儿子
My 13-year-old.
他要去参加他的第一个趴体而不再是去要糖了
He's going to his first party instead of trick-or-treating.
我要做爷爷了
I'm gonna be a grandpa.
听起来是个不错的趴体
Sounds like a hell of a party.
哦会每况愈下的
Oh, it's a slippery slope.
所以你打算怎么办?恩?无业游民?
What are you supposed to be? Huh? Unemployed?
事实上没错
Actually, yes.
说得好
Good call, man.
今早我辞职了
This morning, I quit my job.
什么鬼?!
What the fuck?!
我知道! 简直是疯了对吧?
I know! It's crazy, right?
那是什么表情啊?
What is that look?
我从来没在你脸上看到过
I've never seen that look on you before.
我就是一直觉得你是个太监
I just always thought you were a eunuch.
那就是你为什么不能像个男人一样有孩子
That's why you couldn't make babies like a real man.
大哥你真是最坏的...
Dude, you are the worst offic...
我希望你可以
I mean I wish you could
听听你说的这些话
hear the stuff that comes out of your mouth
然后和其他人一起被吓到
so that you would join the rest of us at being horrified.
结果呢
It turns out,
你的两腿之间
you have a real set of bowling balls
那"胆"够大啊
between your legs.
十分感谢
Thank you very much.
我感受到了...不熟悉的感觉
I have this... unfamiliar feeling, uh,
很像是嫉妒但绝对不是
something like envy but obviously not
因为我比你挣得钱多
because I make way more money than you
而且我老婆比你的年轻一岁
and my wife's a year younger than yours.
所以明显... 这不可能
So, cl... clearly, that's not possible.
不可能
It's not possible.
好吧有些人
Okay, well, there's someone else
会不同意你的
who actually disagrees with you
对于我睾丸直径的看法
about the size of my testicular circumference.
-比如谁? -比如依奇
- Like who? - Like Izzy.
不好吧看这个表情我就认识
No. Okay. See, that look I recognize.
像是你表示不支持的表情
That's, like, your disapproving look
因为我看了一辈子了
'cause I see that all my fucking life.
- 是啊你活该 - 呃...
- Yeah. You deserve it. - Well...
喔艹
Oh, shit.
跟医生有约妈的我忘了
Baby doc. Shit, I forgot.
- 杰克? - 嗯?
- Jack? - Yep?
我知道的
I know.
相信我我们已经结束了好吧?
Believe me, we ended it, okay?
一切都结束了别再担心了我已经解决了
It's over, so don't worry. I got this.
是啊一直那样就最好了
Yeah. Better stay that way.
那...没问题
It's... no problem.
这个小杂种
Little fucktard.
我听到了喔
I hear that.
我听到你说那些话了喔
I can hear you saying these words.
哈啰
Hello.
我有没有让你想要因为自己单方面的欲望而自杀?
Do I make you want to kill yourself with unrequited lust?
今晚我要扮演尸体参加死亡人数清点游戏
I'm going for a body count tonight.
看着就像
Yeah, you are.
如果你不愿意来上我的话我绝对会失去自我的
I would totally off myself if you wouldn't fuck me.
我知道的
I know.
安迪说我并不是疯了
Andy said I'm not crazy.
亲爱的你这样胡言乱语
Sweetie, it's been quite a while
已经有一段时间了
since you've made any sense at all.
你确实是个小笨蛋
You're literally senseless.
可不许别人这么说你喔
Don't let anybody tell you otherwise.
如果你认真听的话他说的确实还挺对的
He made a good point if you're open to hearing it.
不宝贝他说的一点也不对所以我也不会去听
No, baby. He didn't, so I'm not.
他说我确实与杰克和艾玛坠入爱河了
He said I really did fall for Jack and Emma.
接受自己精神错乱的这个现实要比
It's just easier to accept being insane
编造自己让一对住在城郊的夫妇越过我心灵的堡垒偷走了我的心
than inventing that I let a suburban married couple
的事实要容易得多
sneak through my defenses and steal my heart.
这明明是同一件事吧?
Aren't those the exact same things?
听着依依安迪是个挺聪明的男人
Look, Iz. Andy is a really smart boy.
他只是想到了一种比“承认自己是只废猫了”
He just came up with a better, sharper instrument of revenge
更好更犀利的复仇方法而已
than "You're a basket case".
嗯你大概是对的
Yeah, you're probably right.
自从我们上次见过面之后
Has anything changed in your sex life
你们的性生活中有什么改变了吗?
since our last meeting?
- 没有 - 没有
- No. - No.
你的意思是…在我老婆说了我们每周
I mean, we... you mean since my wife said
滚1.5次床单之后吗?
we had sex 1.5 times a week?
但在那之后我已经澄清了我们并不是
But then I clarified that we weren't actually
真的只滚这么几次床单
having fractional intercourse
因为那样是…
'cause that would be...
- 对 - 不可能的
- Right. - ... impossible.
那是...
That was...
我什么时候说的那话?
Uh, when was that?
十天前这么一来那就更简单了
10 days ago. So let's make it even simpler.
自从那天以后你们一共滚了多少次床单?
How many times have you had sex since then?
呃和对方一起滚的吗?
Oh, what, with each other?
真是个蠢问题
Stupid question.
她...那可是滚床单啊亲爱的
She's... that is sex, honey.
我觉得是七...七次对吧?
I would say seven... seven times, right?
嗯听上去…很对
Yeah. That sounds... that sounds right.
挺好的非常好啊
That's good. That's very good.
- 非常感谢你 - 是的
- Thank you very much. - Yeah.
我们也挺开心的
We're very happy about it.
我们差不多也把滚床单当作日常了对吧?
We've been kind of getting in the groove, you know?
对的我觉得…我觉得
Yeah. I think... I think
我们会看到成果的
we're gonna see some results.
这样的进步是完全基于你们想要建立一个完整的家庭
Is this improvement based entirely on trying
还是你们做出了其他的改变
to start a family, or did you make any other changes