不 你把钥匙给我 不 你在干嘛
No, you give me the keys! No, what are you doing?
别叮当叮当的了 我知道你要干嘛
Stop jingling on. I know what you're doing.
你之前也是这样对我的 - 不 不 不
It's the same thing you were doing to me. - No, no! No!
不
No!
老兄 你没必要把钥匙吞了
Dude, you don't have to swallow the key!
没错 他吞了
Yeah, he did.
教了他这个 我真安慰
Taught him that move myself.
典型的DeMamp招数
Classic DeMamp maneuv.
三倍速度说这个 - DeMamp招数
Say that three times fast. - DeMamp maneuv.
DeMamp招数 DeMamp招数
DeMamp maneuv. DeMamp maneuv.
DeMamp招数 - 停下
DeMamp maneuv. - Stop!
你不行
You couldn't.
有点艰难 我喉咙里有把钥匙呢
That was tough. I have key in my throat.
好了 好了 好了
All right, all right. All right.
我要叫 我要叫Ders 我要回家了
I'm calling--I'm calling Ders. I'm going home.
我 我试着做一个支持你的朋友
I'm--I try to be a supportive friend.
但我再也做不到了
I can't do it anymore.
Blake 没错
Blake, yeah.
我想来接你
I'd love to come pick you up.
你在哪儿
Where are you?
他在哪儿
Where is he?
嗯哼 好 好的
Uh-huh. Yeah, okay.
我们15分钟左右到
We can be there about 15 minutes.
好的 拜 咱们聊聊披萨吧
Okay, bye. Let's talk pizza.
我想要一张上面有我的脸的卡
I want a card with my face on it
那样就可以带着它到你的任何一家店
that I can take to any one of your locations
一辈子吃免费的披萨
and get free pizza for the rest of my life.
快告诉我他们在哪儿
Just tell me where they are.
华盛顿大街西535
535 west Washington Avenue,
但首先 我刚把交易砸了 对吧
but first--I just * that up, didn't I?
这个绝对不行
Well, this definitely isn't working.
这儿只有一堆脆皮肉块
There's just a bunch of crispy chunks.
"你永远不能成为一名骑士"
"You shall never be a knight!"
去你的 你这个恶毒的巫师
Screw you, you evil wizard!
我会成为一名骑士的
I'm gonna be a knight!
我会成为一个 嘿 伙计们
I'm gonna be a-- guys!
有人来了
We got company!
确切地说是这家店的主人
Specifically the owner of this company.
Annette来了
Annette is here.
爷爷这边还没熟呢
Gramps isn't even close to being done.
找个能把骨灰放进去的东西
Grab something to stuff his ashes into.
这个又大又旧的批萨外卖♥♥袋怎么样
Uh, what about this big old pizza bag?
不 用那个又大又旧的批萨外卖♥♥袋
No, grab that big old pizza bag.
这明明和我那个是一样大小的
It's the exact same size pizza bag, but...
好恶心
Ew, that's gross.
请等一下
Now, now, just one second.
你答应过我免费吃批萨的
You promised me free pizza.
你在吧唧嘴吗 吧唧批萨的嘴吗
Are--are you squelching? Is this a pizza squelch?
别再说批萨了 - 你知道吗
Stop talking about the pizza! - You know what?
我现在就跑进去来个突然袭击
I'm gonna run in there right now and I'm gonna blow this raid.
伙计们
You guys, you guys!
你们最好在外面等着
You guys better wait outside.
伙计们 他们来了
You guys! They're here!
快点跑
You got to run!
噢哦
Oh, oh!
DeMamps家的人来了
DeMamps! DeMamps!
救命 有人来了 伙计们
Help! We got company, guys!
Adam 救命
Adam, Adam, Adam! Help!
好啦 好啦
All right, all right.
你无处可跑了
Nowhere to go.
告诉我爷爷的棺材在哪
Just tell me where Gramps' casket is.
好吧 我会告诉你尸体在哪
Okay, yes, I will tell you where the body is.
但你得先封我为骑士
Right after you knight me.
兄弟 我才不会封你为骑士
Dude, I'm not gonna knight you.
我都不再在那里工作了
I don't even work there any--
快滚进去 - 嘿
Get your ass in there! - Hey, whoa!
什么情况 - 抱歉 Blake
What gives? - Sorry, Blake.
我老爸说你就是个累赘
My dad told me you're a liability,
然后他解释了什么叫做累赘
and then he explained to me what that word meant,
你就是个累赘 老兄
and that's exactly what you are, man.
你把他们引过来了
You led him right to us.
咱们快去公园
Let's get to the park.
嘿 伙计们 - Ders
Hey, guys. - Ders!
我和Annette一起来的 但她食言了
I came with Annette, but she squelched on a deal,
所以我要叛变了 我和你们做个交易
so I'm willing do a double-cross and strike a deal with you guys.
我确实想和你做个交易
I do want to make a deal.
来 我小点声讲 才怪 裸胶锁喉术
Come here, I'm gonna whisper in your ear--weird naked choke!
别 别裸的
No! No naked!
你揍了我所有的朋友
You're beating up all my friends.
就像小时候那样
It's like childhood all over again.
别开枪
Do not shoot.
我们没带武器
We are unarmed.
我们没有枪 Adam
We don't have guns, Adam.
这是什么情况
What is going on?
我们在你的批萨店里做汉堡来着
We made burgers in your pizza kitchen.
怎么着吧 - Adam
Deal with it. - Adam.
Annette 我很抱歉
Annette, I'm sorry.
我们知道爷爷有多爱"小派一碟"批萨
We know how much Gramps loved the easy as pie pizza and...
我们只是希望能和他共享最后一块派
We just wanted to share one last pie
在和他最后道别之前
with him before saying adios.
你必须把他还给我们
Now you have to just leave him for us or I'm gonna
否则我就要报♥警♥了
have to call the police,
我不想这么干 因为你还在假释期
and I don't want to do that because I know you're on parole.
谢谢
Appreciate you.
再见 爷爷
Bye, Gramps.
去吧
Release.
这真是太酷了
That was so cool.
我等不及告诉Ders这些了
I can't wait to go find Ders and tell him about it.
Adam 他在棺材里
He's in the casket, Adam.
是这样
Yeah, that's right.
所以这事儿才很酷
That's why it was so cool.
好吧 但我还是想告诉Ders
Okay, I still want to tell Ders, though.
我需要你把钥匙给吐出来
I'm gonna need you to yuck up the keys now.
快点 - 好吧
Come on, buddy. - Okay, all right.
马上就好 老爸
Coming right up, pops.
这才对嘛
There it is.
啊啊啊 你个混♥蛋♥
Ahh, you piece of shit!
你个大混♥蛋♥ - 放轻松点 好不
You piece of shit! - Relax, all right?
明天早上会有人放我们出来的
Somebody'll let us out in the morning.
明早吗 还是赶快给我封爵吧
The morning? Knight me real quick.
我们来个酷炫的组合拳
Let's do a sweet double-team move.
末日军团来了 伙计
Legion of doom, bro. Just boom!
我就是个批萨店的维修工
I'm a maintenance man at a pizzeria.
而且 我看不出你有何骑士风范
Besides, I haven't seen you commit an act of valor,
因此你不具备被封爵的先决条件
which is a knighthood pre-req.
咋地 - 嘿 好吧
Duh. - Hey, okay.
我也有过很多英勇事迹
I have done a lot of Valiant stuff, okay?
比如说吧
Okay, for instance.
我帮助过一个坐轮椅的残疾人
I helped a dude in a wheelchair
在电影院的厕所里 帮他擦屁♥股♥
wipe his butt in a movie theater bathroom.
可脏了 他屁♥股♥沟里长了好多毛
And it was messy. He had a hairy butt crack.
可你知道吗 你就是个烂人
You know what? Fine, you suck, dude.
我能把我们弄出去 用很蠢的方法
I'll get us out of here in a stupid way.
我们本来可以酷酷地逃出去的
Would've been a lot cooler if we, you know,
成为骑士 一起杀出去
knighted our way out of here.
什么
Hmm? Huh?
哦 我的天
Oh, my God! Oh, my God.
Blake 我在棺材里
Blake, dude! I'm in a casket!
我被困住了 我不知道我在哪里
I'm trapped in here! I don't know where I am!
你得帮帮我 我的天
You got to help me! Oh, my God!
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