假如…？（2021）

Oh, what is that light box thing you've got there?
是魔法 我好爱魔法 是你一个人造的吗
Oh, it's magic. I love magic. Did you build this all by yourself?
不好意思 我刚好是有多个博士学位的天体物理学家
Excuse me? I happen to be an astrophysicist with multiple PhDs.
得要一大帮阿斯加德人
You know, it would take a whole team of Asgardians
才能造出这种东西
to create such a thing.
你一定是天才 你是天才吧
You must be a genius. You are a genius, aren't you?
我不确定是不是天才啦 不过...
Well, I don't know about genius, but...
还有 你的眼睛
And your eyes...
所有天才的眼睛都是如此神秘幽深吗
Do all geniuses have such deep, dark eyes?
就像看着两颗星星
It's like watching the birth
在银河系边缘诞生
of two stars on the edge of the galaxy.
现在是特♥价♥时段 想来点半价玉米片吗
Well, it's happy hour. Want some half-price nachos?
好吧 鸭仔 但这可不是约会
Okay, fine, Duck. But this is not a date.
看看会怎么发展呗
Let's just see where this evolves.
放泡沫
Release the foam.
对骰子吹气
Blow on these.
老娘需要新视角
Momma needs a brand-new eye.
沃斯塔格坠机啦
Volstagg has crashed!
我现在宣布你们结为达西和怪鸭夫妻
I now pronounce you Darcy and the Duck.
好开始纹身店
魔法 科学
电♥话♥
Ah, phone.
电♥话♥ 电♥话♥ 别吵了
Ah, phone... Phone! Oh, shut up!
未知来电
简·福斯特博士
Dr. Jane Foster?
来了 来了
Coming. I'm coming.
简·福斯特博士
Dr. Jane Foster!
等一下
Hold on.
简·福斯特博士 我们是神盾局
Dr. Jane Foster, this is S.H.I.E.L.D.
如果你不开门 我们就...
If you do not answer, we will--
什么事
Yes?
我们找到她了 长官
We have her, ma'am.
我是玛丽亚·希尔 神盾局代理局长
Maria Hill, Acting Director of S.H.I.E.L.D.
你得跟我们走
You need to come with us.
能不能等我先吃完早餐
Can this wait until after breakfast? 'Cause...
你是第一个警告我们有外星威胁的人
You were the first to warn us about this extraterrestrial threat.
现在我希望你会是消除威胁的关键人物
Now I hope you will be the key to eliminating it.
"威胁" 你真觉得他是威胁吗
"Threat"? Would you call him a threat, really?
你想知道我为什么是代理局长吗 福斯特博士
Do you wanna know why I am the Acting Director, Dr. Foster?
不行
Nope.
大玩咖 这虽然是你的派对
Hey, Spicoli. This might be your party,
但这里不是你的星球
but this isn't your planet.
在有人受伤之前 我需要...
Before someone gets hurt, I need...
深水炸♥弹♥
Ball cannons!
-他没事吧 -仍然昏迷不醒
- Is he okay? - He's still unconscious.
要不要点吃的
We getting food?
屋里还有别人吗 福斯特博士
Do you have company, Dr. Foster?
是一个朋友
Uh... A friend.
你们快看 洗手池里有只可爱的小兔子
Guys, guys, look. There's a cute little rabbit in the sink.
瞧这小兔子 多漂亮啊
Oh, look at this little rabbit. It's gorgeous.
他是...动物学家 我再联♥系♥你 好吗
He's... a zoologist. I'll call you, okay?
我全都告诉你了
I told you everything.
我追踪异常的起源 到了拉斯维加斯
I followed the anomaly's origin to Vegas.
然后你做了什么
And then what did you do?
局长 派对气氛似乎蔓延开来了
Director, the party atmosphere seems to be spreading.
加拿大 蒙古 甚至是宾州荷兰郡
Canada, Mongolia, even Pennsylvania Dutch country.
由主要煽动者 阿斯加德的托尔领头
Led by the main instigator, Thor of Asgard,
他现在已经飞走了
who's now taken to the skies.
什么 他走了
What? He left?
他...他有没有留下字条
Did he... Did he even leave a note at...
我是说 他有没有说他去哪儿了
I mean, did... Did he say where he was going?
-转得真"不硬" -多谢了
- Smooth. - Thanks.
-我是讽刺你 -巴黎
- Sarcasm. - Paris.
他一个同伙的原话是 "馋可丽饼了"
One of his compatriots was, and I quote, "Jonesing for crepes."
长官
Ma'am...
最后手段到了
the last resort has arrived.
等一下 "最后手段" 听起来没转弯余地了
Whoa, whoa. "Last resort" sounds very final.
这可是地球第一次接触到外星生命
This is Earth's first encounter with alien life.
今天的应对方式将为我们和外星的外交关系
How we respond today will set the tone for diplomatic relations
定下好几代的基调
between our worlds for generations.
"外交关系"
"Diplomatic relations"?
现在的年轻人都用这种词吗
Is that what the kids are calling it?
你错了 博士
You're wrong, Doctor.
这不是神盾局第一次遭遇外星人
This isn't S.H.I.E.L.D.'s first alien rodeo.
传呼机 我爸有一部 他是足病医生
A beeper? My dad has one! He's a podiatrist.
等等 你们要呼叫足病医生吗
Wait, are you guys calling a podiatrist?
发送中
完成了
It's done.
正在发生吗 有发生吗 我错过什么了
Is it happening? Did it happen? What'd I miss?
好 来吧 都贴近一点
All right, here we go. Nestle on in.
-所有人说"华夫饼" 我喜欢这词 -茄子
- Everyone say "Waffles." I love that word. - Cheese.
上面浇了枫糖浆和鲜奶油的华夫饼
Waffles with maple syrup and whipped cream on top.
-托尔 -托尔
- Thor! - Thor!
他来了 他来了
He came! He's here!
女巫的那个混♥蛋♥儿子 托尔·奥丁森在哪
Oi! Where's that son of a witch, Thor Odinson?
你说什么
What did you say?
范达尔 那根丑爆的冰棍是在跟我说话吗
Fandral, tell me, is that butt-ugly popsicle stick talking to me?
-击个拳 -你居然来了
- Bring it on in. - I can't believe you came!
洛基 你真是最棒啦
Loki, you are the absolute best!
你就是我的异母兄弟 我真心这么认为
You're my brother from another mother, man. I mean that.
-真心的 -一辈子的好兄弟
- I mean it. - Brothers forever.
一辈子的好兄弟
Brothers forever!
一辈子
Forever!
等等 怎么有闷响 你是不是放屁了
Wait, what's that boom? Did you boom?
我没放屁 你有放吗 你经常放屁
No, I didn't boom. Did you boom? You always boom.
我从来不放 我只在私下放
I never boom. I only boom in private.
洛基 快看 是流星 赶紧许愿
Oh, oh, oh. Loki, look, it's a shooting star. Make a wish, quick!
对 是流星 好 我希望...
Yes, yes, a shooting star. Yes, okay. I wish... I wish...
法国
我希望 我希望 我希望
I wish, I wish, I wish... I wish...
-我想到了 -什么愿望 告诉我
- Uh... I've got it! - What is it? Tell me.
我怎么能告诉你 说出来会不灵的
I couldn't possibly tell you. It'll ruin the magic.
白蛇 我们得谈谈
Hey, Whitesnake. We need to chat.
我叫托尔 写法是TROH
The name is Thor, with a "T" And an "R" and an "O" and a "H."
但不是按这个顺序
But not in that order.
-你办的派对不错 -根本是最精彩的
- Quite some party you're throwing. - Isn't it the best?
我本来希望冰霜兄弟们能来
I mean, I'd hoped the Ice Bros would show,
但洛基居然亲自驾到 洛基王子耶
but Loki himself? Prince Loki?
你开玩笑吗 我怎么可能错过
Are you kidding? I wouldn't miss this for the world.
听着 收拾好这烂摊子 然后离开这星球
Listen, bud, clean up this mess and leave this planet.
什么 不要 我喜欢这里 人人都喜欢我
What? No, I like it here. Everyone likes me.
我们玩得超开心 直到你出现了
We're having a great time... till you showed up.
派对结束了 哥们
Party's over, pal.
是吗 我倒有个想法
Mmm. Yeah, maybe here's a thought.
不如你滚蛋吧
Uh, how about you just buzz off?
这不是请求 万人迷
I wasn't asking, hotshot.
米德加德有个词用来形容你这种女人
You know, there's a Midgardian word for women like you.
扫兴鬼
Party pooper.
没错 我就说了
There. I said it.
好吧 这一拳是替弗瑞出气
Okay, this one's for Fury.
剩下的人...
Now, for the rest of you...
吃我一锤
Have at you!
出手挺利落 但你...
Smooth move, bro. You just--
回旋锤 懂了吗
Hammerang. Get it?
听着 伙计 我数到三
Look, pal, I'm gonna count to three
你把锤子放下
and you're gonna put the hammer down.
来了 来了
Oh, here we go. Here we go.
和你说什么来着 停手
Hey, what did I tell you? Knock it off.
英国
停下 这些都是...
Hey, quit it. These are...
我也不知道这些是什么
I don't know what these are.
没人知道 但是...不 我说不行 停
No one does. But... No! I said no! Stop.
但我只需要轻轻这么一下
Oh, but I just have to do a little boop.
完了 你的怪石头都倒了