大门奖（2023）

你是个可悲的人
You are a sad, sad, sad person,
没了你之后 我的人生好多了
and my life is so much better now that you're not a part of it.
你有毒 我与你断绝关系 我们结束了
You're toxic, you're cut off and we're done.
那么 就到此为止了吧
So, are we good here or what?
我们还得和她们说今天的特餐
We still need to tell them about the specials.
今天我们的菜单中有一个特餐 “西葫芦趾头”
We have a special new item on our menu today. Zucchini toes.
类似鸡柳条 但不是用鸡肉 而是用西葫芦来当填料
It's like chicken fingers, but instead of chicken, it's stuffed with zucchini,
而且更短小 就像脚趾 “西葫芦趾头”
and it's shorter, like toes. Zucchini toes.
非常美味
They're delicious.
请容许我道歉
Please accept my apologies.
没事的 伊兹 虽然我是有些问题要问
It's fine, Izzy. Although, I do have some questions.
天啊 开始了
Oh God, here we go.
首先 我们应该单点西葫芦趾头
Starting with, should we order individual zucchini toes
还是点一整份西葫芦脚
or commit to the whole foot?
艾米莉 好好走路
Emily, walk simply.
你以为你今天是谁 - 爸爸 你真凶
Who do you think you are, today? - Papa, you're terrible.
上一秒你让我站直 下一秒
One minute you tell me to stand up straight, and the next minute
就骂我
you call me names.
我不想听你说话
I just don't listen to you.
哇 - 天啊 翠娜 真精彩
Whoa. - Wow, that was great, Trina.
很有张力 - 对 真的
I really felt that. - Yep. Really.
我能提点建议吗
You mind if I make a suggestion?
不好 来吧 我就知道会这样
Uh-oh. Here we go. I thought this might happen.
“时间老人”认为 这出戏对于学生而言太暴♥力♥了
Old Father Time thinks it's too violent for a school to play.
其实 我想说有更安全的方式
Actually, I was gonna say there's a safer way to do that.
神父 你能给我们展示一下吗 - 噢 那不太好吧
Can you show us, Father? - Oh, no, I don't know.
我们真的需要帮助
It would really help us.
我很肯定鲁本神父得回去打羽毛球了
I'm pretty sure Father Reuben needs to get back to his badminton.
我们应该继续排演
We should probably carry on with our texts.
我可以给你们示范一下 - 真的 太好了
I can show you a few things. - Really? Okay, sick.
来吧 - 这是演哪出戏
Come on. - Where did this come from?
我不知道 但我很享受 - 像这样
I don't know but I love it. - ...like this.
然后 你用右手握拳
And then you make a fist with your right hand,
左手放在他的胸脯上
put your left hand on his chest.
这样你可以估算你们之间的距离
That's so you can gauge the distance between you.
然后 像这样 让观众看到你的拳头
So, then you show the audience your fist like this,
但即将碰到的时候
but then when you're about to make contact,
松开拳头 所以只是手指会擦过他
you loosen your grip, so your fingers are just grazing him.
然后 拳头快碰到他时 扭动身体 用左脚重重跺地
And then, as you follow through, twist your body, stomp with the left foot.
像这样
Like so.
噢 天啊 这... - 噢 对 不是真的
Oh, wow. That was-- - Oh, no. Wasn't real.
天啊 鲁本神父 这招好厉害 你是从哪里学来的
Yo, that's dope as hell, Father Reuben. How you know all this stuff?
就这么说吧 我小时候常常看摔角比赛
Let's just say I spent a lot of time watching wrestling as a kid
要是不读神学院 我就会去参加美国职业摔角了
and it was either seminary or WWE, so...
你还会哪些招数
What else can you do?
我已经生疏了 我可不会摔学生
It's been a while. I'm not about to body slam a student.
你可以用我爸来试 - 等...什么
You can try it on my dad. - Hold-- What?
不...别急 这样好...
No. N-- Hold on. Is that a good--
因为感觉我们越来越脱离剧本了
Because it feels like we're getting further and further away from the text.
达斯提 这就是我们一直在说的
Dusty, this is what we've been talking about.
想办法与学生产生共鸣
You know, finding ways to meet the students on their level.
让课程更加与时俱进
You know, making the curriculum feel more relevant
贴近他们的体验
to what they're going through.
而且也能大大拉近你的翠娜的关系
I mean, and you could score some major points with Trina.
来吧
Come on.
好的 我来 对
All right. I'll do it. Yeah.
好的 我先拉伸一下身体
All right. Just let me stretch out a little bit.
我的腹股沟受了伤 噢 对 是的
I'm nursing a bit of a groin injury. Oh, yeah. All right.
别对我下狠手 - 好的
Go easy on me. - Yeah, all right.
我说真的
Seriously.
当然了 你们以前有...
Sure, I mean, you used to have this...
想聊聊你女儿的事吗
So, do you wanna talk about what's going on with your daughter?
不 最好别让那个毁了今天下午 对吗
No, we're not gonna let that ruin our afternoon, are we?
好的 纯粹因为你看起来有点沮丧
Okay. Just 'cause you seem a bit distracted.
不 有时我专心致志时 看起来像是心不在焉
No, I just look off sometimes when I'm concentrating.
亲爱的 请你别往心里去
You mustn't take that personally, dear.
好的 亲爱的
Okay, dear.
我们聊聊别的吧
Let's talk about something else.
我以前的一个舞伴曾养马
I used to dance with someone who raised horses.
她好像还让马参加了盛装舞步比赛
Yeah. I think she even entered them in those dressage competitions.
我不是很喜欢马
I'm not really into horses.
这样吗
You're not?
不知道为什么我觉得你喜欢呢
I wonder why I would have thought you were.
那么 你最喜欢什么动物
So, what would you say is your favorite animal?
伊兹 我不介意你的女儿恨你
Izzy, I don't care that your daughter hates you.
她不恨我
She doesn't hate me.
她只是目前在经历困难时期
She's just going through a phase right now.
是的 她和我断绝了关系 也不知道那是什么意思
And, yes, she's cut me off whatever that means.
不久前 她指责我没有爱的能力
She accused me not so long ago of being incapable of love.
那有什么问题吗
Well, what's wrong with that?
你是出于礼貌这么说 但我知道你内心在评判我
You're being polite, but inside I know you're judging me.
我在评判你吗
Is that what I'm doing?
我曾试图抛下她一次...那时她还小
I tried to leave her once... when she was young.
我们刚搬到迪尔菲德 我...
And we just moved to Deerfield. I...
我曾试图抛弃她
I tried to leave her behind.
她在这里生活得很开心 而且...
And she was happy here, and she--
她和玛莎很爱彼此
She and Martha loved each other.
但我觉得这里的生活无聊透顶 决定离开
But I was so fucking bored, I decided I should just go.
(继续吗 )
所以 这就是真正的我
So, that's who I am.
你可以继续评判我
So, you can go on and judge me
不需要先知晓我这方的说法
without even ever hearing my side of the story.
我觉得你刚才已经告诉了我 你这方的说法了
I think you just told me your side of the story.
可是 伊兹 你没有抛下她
But, Izzy, you didn't leave.
因为你还在这里 显然你回来了 而且谁在乎啊
Clearly, since you're still here, you came back. And also, who cares?
你以为自己是第一个 想要逃离自己问题的人吗
You think you're the first person to try to run from her problems?
你觉得我就没做过烂事或惹恼人吗
You think I haven't done shitty things or pissed people off?
我的大部分家人恨我 - 真的
Most of my family hates me. - Really?
为什么 - 留在我身边 你就会明白
Why? - Stick around. You'll find out.
我不需要你是什么大好人
I don't need you to be a great person.
我只想要坦诚相待
I just don't want any bullshit.
你想不想去一个更私密的地方
How would you feel about going somewhere more private?
我很乐意
I'd like that.
她们是要吃霸王餐
Are they just skipping out on the bill?
对 这种事时有发生
Yeah, that happens a lot.
但也是要从我们的工资扣 所以也许你想拦住她
But it also comes out of our pay, if you wanna chase after her.
不...随她去吧 她已经达到目的
No. No, let her go. She got what she came for.
她连午餐都没吃 这只证明了我的想法
She's not even staying for lunch, which proves my point.
但就是很奇怪
It's just weird.
她好像什么都没做
It didn't really seem like she was even doing anything.
那是因为你不知道我们的过往
Well, that's because you don't know the history.
对 可以说她就是我 从没有过真正工作的原因
Yeah. She's basically the reason I've never had a real job.
真的 她做了什么 - 她打♥压♥我
Really? What she do? - She just brings me down.
她总是打♥压♥我
She always brings me down.
我这一辈子 每次
It's like, my whole life, any time I was, like,
我开始擅长某事 比如舞蹈课或是声乐课
good at something, like dance lessons, or like singing lessons.
或是我开始去找工作 她就会让我觉得自己能力不足
Or when I started going out for jobs, she made me feel so inadequate.
于是我就放弃了尝试
I just stopped pushing myself to try.
是 好吧
Yeah. Okay.
什么“是 好吧” 你不相信我
What do you mean, "Yeah, okay"? You don't believe me?
不是的 听起来很惨
No. It sounds brutal.
但是 你已经40岁了 - 39
But, like, you're 40 years old-- - Thirty-nine.
39岁 你还在怪罪你妈
Thirty-nine. You're still blaming your mom?
不好意思 女士 能给我们菜单吗
Excuse me, miss, could we get some menus?
她只是培训生 我马上就过去 好吗
She's just a trainee. I'll be over in just a second, okay?
事实上 我不只是培训生
Actually, no, I'm not just a trainee.
你要做...卡丝 别...等等
What are you-- Cass, no, no. Wait.
我叫卡丝 我将是你今天的服务生
My name is Cass, and I will be your server today.
其实 我已经记熟菜单了
Well, actually I know the menu by heart.
我希望你能再看一眼
Well, I would love you to take one more peek.
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