陪审义务（2023）

and I need to clear some tests.
基本就是 我们会说是实验室出错
Basically there was-- we're gonna say there was a lab error.
好吧 现在
Well, it is
快上午10点了
almost 10:00 AM.
还没收到我今天的核酸检测结果
Still haven't received my COVID test for the day.
就当罗纳德还以为其他陪审员也被关在房♥里等检测结果时
剧组偷偷将他们带出去彩排了一整天
我们要在此待到11点 我们有...
We're going to be here until 11:00.
（工厂彩排）
许多事项要在工厂里排练
We've got a good amount of things to rehearse here at the factory.
等我打个卡
A bunch of work here.
考勤必须打卡
You got your time card.
他们下楼来 我会提示你们
They're coming back down. We'll cue you guys up,
所有人重新聚一起
together everybody back up.
你们这些人是参与楼上人体模型层的
Those of you that are involved in the upstairs mannequin bed,
我想我们要讨论以下...
I think we are gonna talk through some
三种情况：他是否会轻易上钩
A, B, and C on whether he goes easily,
我们是否要再想辙 以及他是否死都不上钩
whether we re-approach, and ultimately if he doesn't go.
嗯 我们在工厂的整个期间
Yeah, the whole time we were in the factory,
都在窃窃私语说"他是死脑筋吗？"
we were all just whispering about, like, is he serious?
上面可能有什么
There might-- there might be some shit up here.
那是主管办公室
That's the supervisor's office.
但我们可以随便看
But we can check anywhere.
妮基警官
Bailiff Nikki,
可以随便看 对吧？
we can check anywhere, right?
想看哪里都可以
You can check anywhere you want.
你说 不 伙计
And you were just like no, dude,
咱们不能上去 写着"员工专用" 我就想没戏了
we can't-- we can't go up there. It says personnel only. I was like he's not getting up there.
后来 一直到...
And then, it was only until
坤和卡桑德拉上去了 -牛逼
Ken and Cassandra went up there. - We made it.
要怎么办 哥们？
What's going on here, bro?
由我决定的话 我会待在一楼
If it would've been up to me, I would've stayed on the floor.
我是说 我没想过他们会把证据藏在密室
I mean, I didn't think about them, like, hiding evidence in a backroom.
不会上楼的
I wouldn't have gone upstairs.
我们在"玛格丽塔之乡"玩得好开心
We had so much fun in Margaritaville.
（玛格丽塔之乡彩排）
为了不挡镜头 我转身脱上衣
For coverage, if I turned to take the shirt off,
是从右肩下手好还是从左肩好？
is it better to go under my right shoulder or my left?
右边吧 -行
Probably your right. - Okay.
因为摄像机在那 他们至少能拍到
Because there's that camera there. And they can at least get that
有台摄像机 对吧？
and they've got a camera there, right?
动动脑子 -好吧
Think of it logically. - Okay.
我坐大巴已经坐好久了 要上卫生间
I have been on a bus for a very long time, bathroom.
我快憋不住了 必须去... -好 快去
I -- every time. I have to go to the... - Okay, go.
因为 这是最后一次
Because this is the last time.
嗯 我的头都晕了 就是哇哦 好吧
Yeah, my head was just spinning and it's like wow, okay, this,
他穿的衬衣刚让我们有了位子
this shirt that he's wearing just got us this table
可现在有个...我靠 所以投诉的人
but now there's an, oh, shit, so the people who complained,
他们也是演员吗？ 该死的
were those actors, too? God damn it.
暂停 暂停 所以问题是
Time out, time out. So the question is,
你真醉了吗？ 你们真的...
like, so did you actually get drunk? Were you guys actually...
他们只许我们喝一杯 剩下都是无酒精
They let us have, like, one drink and the rest of them were virgins.
他和我喝的那些都是水 -水
All those shots that he and I took are water. - Water.
瞧 这就是我想弄明白的 行 好吧
See, that's what I was wondering. Okay. All right. All right.
如果他不喝酒 你们也不能喝酒
If he doesn't drink, you won't drink.
如果他点一杯饮料
If he does order a beverage,
其他人也可以点一杯
everyone else can order one beverage.
其余一律是无酒精的
Everything else will be virgin.
我们不能点真正的酒水 除非你先点
We couldn't order an actual drink until you did.
所以我们才说 赶紧的 伙计 点起来
So we were like come on, dude. Order up.
你点好了吗？
Did you order yet?
没有 你呢？ -没有 没点呢
Negative. Have you? - No. No.
你是领队 你应该点单
You're the foreman. You get to order.
免了吧 伙计 -从...非你莫属
Oh, no way, dude. - From-- just, just for you.
可以过欢乐时光了 -眼下就很欢乐了
It's 5:00 somewhere. - It's 5:00 right here.
我是指开喝
I was talking about the drink.
我 先给他看 因为他是
Get him first because he's a-- he's a--
他是我们的老大 -我先来？
he's our, uh, number one guy. - Oh, me first?
快点吧 罗纳德
Order, Ronald.
那行吧 我来杯芒果巴黎
Damn, yeah. Let me do the Mango in Paris.
芒果巴黎？ -嗯
Mango in Paris? - Yeah.
好 芒果巴黎
Cool. Cool. Mango in Paris.
咱们怎么说？ 怎么说？
What are we doing? Give him the water. What are we doing?
我们可以开喝了 -太好了
We're getting drinks. - Nice.
所以粪团塑形就用这个或这个
So the, the turd will be sculpted with either this or this.
（制♥作♥预备会议）
好的 -还要
Okay. - And will be--
我们给内部增重
we'll have weights inside of it
不让它浮起来
so that it stays-- it's not buoyant.
往里塞重物吗？
It stays... Weights inside of it?
（杰森·菲利普斯 道具师）
内部增重 -行
Weight inside. - Okay.
好的 -再把它盘起来
Okay. - And then it will have a coil.
行 -再翘起来一截
Okay. - And then, I think I'm gonna have a length of it
有点像捣药的研磨碗 -赞
sort of like lapping the bowl. - Love that.
然后我们给"碗"的侧面留污点？ -没错
And then we'll leave like a smear on the side of the bowl? - Absolutely.
好 -还有 我打算垫
Okay. - And also, I'm gonna pre, uh,
几张有污渍的厕纸 -赞
skid mark some toilet paper. - Love, love.
所以就是
So, there'll be
就是几张厕纸 然后粪团
some toilet paper, and the turd,
再有厕纸 然后我打算加
and the toilet paper, and then I'm gonna bring
几加仑预制的马桶水 就像...
a couple gallons of pre-made toilet water like during
然后把"碗"淹没到剩点边缘
And then, fill the bowl all the way to sort of the rim,
就形成了那种有点凸出来的粪团
and then just have sort of the turd sticking out like that.
很棒 -感觉还行吗？
That's beautiful. - We feel good about that?
赞 绝对赞 -好吧
Love that. One thousand percent. - All right.
接着 我们用喷雾弄臭房♥间
And then, we reek the room out with a spray.
我的天呐
Oh, my God!
好恶心 -瞧这宝贝
It's so gross. - Look at that baby.
天呐 太恶心了 -吃起来味道不错
Oh, my God, that's so gross. - It tastes good.
我每天写日记 不是那种"流水账" 只不过
I journaled every day, not like a, a detailed journal, but man,
因为有...不断地出幺蛾子
because that's-- all this crazy shit kept happening
詹. 弄坏马桶
诺亚来打岔
找我们帮忙玩"浸化"
我真是根本没法记住所有事情
and I was like I can't even remember all of this stuff, like... Wow.
信息量太大了
It's a sensory overload, man.
你们把我往死里整
You guys threw so much shit at me.
来真的吗？ -嗯 我才不会...
For real? - Yeah. I wouldn't...
所以 你和珍妮假戏真做了还是...
So, did you and Jeannie actually hook up, or...
没 -没有？
No. - No?
所以那什么 那个"浸化"呢
So that whole-- that whole soaking thing?
我们确实 呃
We did
录制了我俩这么干的视频
record video of us doing that.
好吧 我想你应该在上面 -行
Okay. I think you should come, like, on top. - Okay.
但要盖上被子 -对对对
But cover yourself with the covers. - Right, right, right.
要用力蹦还是轻轻蹦？ -这个 蹦轻点
Wait, smaller or bigger jumps? - Uh, smaller jumps.
等等 用力点
Wait, bigger jumps.
行 -别 轻点 拜托
Okay. - No, smaller jumps, James, please.
蹦轻点
Smaller jumps.
轻点 拜托
Smaller jumps, please.
行了
All right.
笑死
Oh, my God.
知道吗？ 我会信以为真的
You know what, I would've-- I would've believed it.
天呐 这样的安排真是烂透了
Man, it sucks that this was, like, staged
因为 嘿 你不知道我会告诉多少人
because, man, you have no idea how many people I was gonna tell about that.
你完全无法估计 伙计
You have no idea, man.
詹姆斯·麦斯登
James Marsden
跑去玩蹦床 好让他俩进行
went and jumped on a bed so they could have
无性行为的性♥爱♥
sex that's not sex.
发生这么多怪事 我早该想到的
All the crazy shit that was happening and I should've known.
早该想到
I should've known.
我喜欢跟你相处
I had so much fun with you.
我也很开心 -我懂
I had a great time, yeah. - I know.
我还记得我们那个 在打电玩 你冲着我
I remember we were, like, playing video games and you went, like,